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I once met Fish from Marillion in a chippy
I once met Chipps from STW in a Fishmongers
I remove rectums for a living
UB40 stole my cheese knife set
Joss Whedon stole my Sharpie.
I have a third nipple.
Not total recall style.
I have your Solex.
regards
Hai Fat
Steve McNeil stole my heart
IHN stole my joke
Perchy has officially stolen one joke.
Cougar's.
Every time I think of a joke I scroll down and find that perchy has already made it. Bastard.
Perchy has officially stolen one joke.
Cougar’s.
Hah! That's where you're wrong...on two counts.
1. I steal all my jokes. I've never had an original thought in my life. I just have an excellent memory and instant recall.
2. Cougar wasn't joking. He is a genuine Steve McNeil fanboi
I've been in about 20 police line ups.
I have more than the average number of legs but less than the average number of ankles...
I smuggled human remains into the UK.
I once had to perform 40 "Back, Sack and Crack" trims before breakfast.
I ate goat in almond sauce with Barry Chuckle
I once had to perform 40 “Back, Sack and Crack” trims before breakfast.
I hope that didnt include curly fries 😆
I went on 15-to-1 and managed to get all my questions wrong.
Three times
Had a run in with that bell Clarkson that went a bit viral (after appearing on STW).
I was also misquoted in The Times in the 80's.
Aged 17, I was mistaken for the BBC's science correspondent and almost got to do an interview
I was asked to sing onstage with the group Sparks, but didn't fancy the trip to York.
Actually, when I think about it, there are loads of things I've not done.
I have two doppelgängers (that I know of)
One held up a bank in my hometown and looked and dressed so like me that I had to carry a get-out-of-jail card issued by the local CID because they'd basically circulated my description.
The other had previously occupied a house a few doors down from me a student and left behind a passport photo. That house in turn had previously been occupied by UB40.
I once met Geoff Capes when I was a kid.
I bought a budgerigar from him as a child.
As a child (8 year old I think) I cleaned Gary Numans WW2 Harvard at North Weald and West Maling airshows (different times!)
I can bunnyhop a penny farthing
My mate Pete and I got into the Top-10 at the 2017 Egg-Throwing World Championship
I used to have to test Paul Nicholas`s harness when he was JC in JC Superstar .....yankawedgie
got chucked out of Buckingham Palace for pinching a maid`s bum
got 50p from Tommy cooper as a Christmas box, and a signed photo and a bottle of brut from anita harris
some other stuff
and...
I have a friend who is tom joness uncles sisters brother`s mate
I once met Chipps from STW in a Fishmongers
I met him in a supermarket once. They had a lovely fish counter.
Mike Patton from Faith No More tried to steal my T Shirt.
The people who helped break Eamon De Valera from Lincoln Prison called at my Grandads house in Sheffield on the way to Manchester. They offered to take my dad and his siblings to America with them. My Grandad declined.
My dad and my aunt heard the conversation as they were playing under the dining room table at the time.....
I've had a kiss from Carol Decker.
Eddie Izzard managed my flat mate's band.
Nobby Stiles' mum was a family friend.
Joe Gladwyn once gave me 50p outside Mount Carmel church in Blackley.
I've sang on stage at Band On The Wall in Manchester. Twice.
I proposed to Victor Brox's daughter.
I ate goat in almond sauce with Barry Chuckle
Don’t you mean berry chutney?
I am a son of Paul McCartney’s first girlfriend (linked to my previous Piers Morgan statement)
I introduced Tony Hawk to Barry Mcguigan at a party in Barcelona
I was the presenter of a TV show, and have been out for beers with a Mod off STW.
I was the presenter of a TV show, and have been out for beers with a Mod off STW.
Scott? Is that you?
I've smoked a spliff with the Mitchel brothers off eastender out the back of a local boozer.
I've seen John Bonham from Led Zep get up and play drums with a local band at an MX club presentation night.
I've represented GB twice at international team world champs
I came second in the donkey derby while on holiday at Butlins.
Scott? Is that you?
Shhh, I'm in disguise
I once played cricket at The Oval and also in the Wanderers Stadium in Johannesburg.
Oh my god.
Shhh, I’m in disguise
Is that why you misspelt your surname?
I once robbed a bank
a bit
I've started breakdance battles in every continent I've visited and can't even breakdance
@stevemcneill genius! 😂 😂
Sorry for starting this thread @Cougar I hope Steve is stopping @perchypanther from tasering you
I was drunk when I registered.
I was drunk when I registered.
With Cougar, we presume?
With Cougar, we presume?
Ah yes, I remember him. I had to tell him an increasingly elaborate series of lies about myself, culminating with saying as well as a TV presenter I was an astronaut for the European Space Agency. It had the opposite effect, at the end of the night he invited me back to his place for “gaming,” I agreed so long as I could send my security team round to sweep the place and install 8-bit consoles. He told me that was absolutely fine. I said I’d be right back, then ran for the hills.
I won a BMX contest when I was five.
At the time, I had never before ridden a BMX.
Sadly, my parents failed to recognise my obvious talent, and bought me a trumpet.
Well played Steve, you TV legend 🙂
He's not Steve, he's Scott, you already busted his disguise.
I agreed so long as I could send my security team round to sweep the place and install 8-bit consoles. He told me that was absolutely fine
This is clearly not true.
In that situation, Cougar wouldn't have been able to resist saying "Ok Steve, sounds Mega"*
*Yeah, I know the Mega Drive was 16 bit and so does Cougar, but he'd have said it anyway**
** 'Cause he's on the Spectrum