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Was it Harry the Spider??
No it was Harry’s barking spider.
Oh, and I'm Peter Purves' love child
I’m related to royalty.
I play the trumpet and guitar
I had one of my teeth kicked out during a game of monopoly.
On the same day we’ve had adjusting one’s oboe as a new euphemism.
Oy, I heard that.
I once had lunch with Clive Dunn and his wife in their flat in Putney.
I once tricked my way into Siri’s house and stored a large amount of fuel in his attic.
Actually, when I say once, I actually did it on three consecutive nights.
I once entered a local kart event with a friend. I finished third, beating a young boy that was meant to be a big deal. This boy was asking around who I was as he couldn't get past me and I was pulling away by the end of the race. That boy's name was Jenson Button. It was enough for one of the smaller teams to offer me a seat for the next 3 events, all local and a week apart.
So in my head I'm faster than a F1 World Champion. Reality is I had just had a lucky event weekend (weekend is heats then a final or two) as over the next few events I got my arse whooped by everyone. Gave up after that.
I once had sweet whoopee with a cast member from Corrie.
I was once interviewed on television.
By Edwina Currie.
During my blue mohawk phase I had lunch with Lord Callaghan and about a month later got told to "Drive on Mr T" by an army officer manning a road block in Zambia.
I've been unicycling on the Quantocks with the guy who made the mashed potato for Bodger and Badger.
i was delivered by test-tube baby pioneering gynaecologist Patrick Steptoe in Oldham hospital. and no, im not.
UB40 stole my cheese knife set
Piers Morgan came to our house when I was a teenager
I failed to kill him
I once convinced a fellow countryside ranger that the moorhen was also known as the Jesus bird because of its ability to walk on water. For several years he would inocently amaze school and college groups with this load of guff...
I was in a film with Christian Slater and Marissa Tomei.
The current Prime Minister of Canada and I were at school together.
I once had a sandwich made for me by Anthrax (the band, not the virus!) They all looked a bit grubby and dishevelled but it tasted really good.
I met Steve Coogan and James Lance while riding up Walna Scar. Steve Coogan was chipper and said encouragingly that it wasn't far to go. I replied that both he and I knew that that wasn't true!
I’ve been accidentally locked in to Winson Green Prison, Rainhill Mental Hospital and Manchester Terminal 2.
I rollerblade.
There you go.
I said it.
It’s out there.
I rollerblade & I bloody well love it.
We have a winner:
I’ve been unicycling on the Quantocks with the guy who made the mashed potato for Bodger and Badger.
I rollerblade & I bloody well love it.
I used to run an inline skate mag. Just before the YoYo mag.
As a baby, I was patted on the head by the kindly old gentleman from the Railway Children film.
When I was around 13 or 14 I sat with Sir Dickie Attenborough in the rear of his chauffeur driven Rolls Royce. Where we discussed football for about ten minutes and I made him laugh with my impression of him in 10 Rillington Place. He was honestly one of the nicest chaps I've ever met.
I have puked on Cliff Richard.
Oh, and I am the Indian national stone skimming champion.*
.
.
.
*I am the only Indian birth certificate waving entry to the world champs, but I am having that one.
I have twice had to abandon oil platforms I've worked on, once by helicopter and another by lifeboat
I was a Nazi soldier in Indian Jones and the Last Crusade, and a road protester in Emmerdale.
That's right, I've had a drink in the Woolpack - who wants to touch me?
I was a Nazi soldier in Indian Jones and the Last Crusade,
Presumably that’s the Bollywood remake.
I witnessed a moored yacht get run over by a drifting container ship.
I once met Geoff Capes when I was a kid. All adults seemed big as a kid, but he was really big! Seemed a nice bloke from what I remember!
Presumably that’s the Bollywood remake.
Have you not seen it? It was very well received. It has a lot more singing and dancing than the original, and the costumes are great.
I was a Nazi soldier in Indian Jones and the Last Crusade,
I bought a second hand alternator for a Mk3 Transit off a guy who dies in all of the first three Indian Jones films.
MrOvershoot it’s my 15 minute attention span that’s to blame.
I once skanked, reggae dancing in translation, to Anthrax for a few songs. In my defence so did a few hundred others as we’d all dropped black micro dots to watch RDF. Hence the 15 minute issue.
just thanked the lady who programmed doom 3do just now (on twitch) 😀
doom 3do was the first doom i ever played so it will always mean a lot to me (even though it is deemed the worst version,there is actually a good reason why).
https://doomwiki.org/wiki/Rebecca_Ann_Heineman is the lady who programmed the game for 3do.
the story of doom 3do is actually pretty interesting (well i think so anyhoo lol).
she seemed pretty amazed when i told her how much i loved doom 3do lol.
Colp I stole Maximo Parks cheeseboard and Cyndi Laupers if it makes you feel better. Bloody pop stars.
Jim Bowen once bought me an ice cream.
I spent a day in a classified nuclear site in Romania unofficially.
A girl called Cherry tried to snog me after just being sick.
I have been to the toilet at +4600m and -1000m relative to sea level whilst still attached to Earth.
I have a third nipple.
Not total recall style.
I've had a kiss off Jet the gladiator
I held the 'jumping over people' and 'jumping over people backwards' records at the local roller disco (13 people side by side forwards, 10 people side by side backwards) on proper wheels-at-the corners skates.
Colp I stole Maximo Parks cheeseboard and Cyndi Laupers if it makes you feel better. Bloody pop stars.
Hang on, maybe I jumped the gun here.
2006 around July time, did you go to Delamere at all?
I met Paul Mariner (ex-Ipswich and Arsenal striker) on the deck of the Holyhead- Dun Laoghaire fast catamaran in the late 80s.
I can turn my lower eyelids inside my eye without touching them
I’ve just remember that as a a Cub Scout I stood next to Patrick Moore and had a piss whilst he was making an appearance at Herstmonceaux castle. The Greenwich Telescope was located their at the time.
I have an imprint of a three pin plug on the sole of my right foot.
I once met Fish from Marillion in a chippy
I was accused by social services of not paying child support for 2 children. They came out to see me and properly laid in to me and my mum and dad about it and they couldn't understand why we were laughing about it. Police and courts were threatened constantly too. Worked out fairly quickly when they were there as I was 14 at the time and the kids were 5 and 3 they couldn't be mine. But they wouldn't listen to that, even when dad gave them my birth certificate! Eventually we worked out the bloke had the exact same name as me and his house name was the same, just a different village.