following a comment in another thread on here, I once left my flat to go to my folks for lunch, got into my car and realised i'd forgotten my coat so went back to my flat to find my then housemate going at it over some 'niche'* images.
"Oh, you've caught me red handed" says he 😯
what's yours?
*foot/boot content
Rolled back into car park after solo night ride with lights off, having browned out a few minutes earlier. Flipped lights back on to find my wheels, only to highlight a couple of the "light on their loafers" persuasion, doing the hands on shoulders thing..... Thought I carried it off well by calling out "evening" and just going about my business, (but quite quickly to be fair).
Going sailing early one sunday morning, to find two very attractive ladies running naked around a roundabout in high heels, with people shouting encouragement from nearby window.
Flip side...
I was staying in a B&B in the New Forest with my wife (then GF). We had been out riding the day before (me on my steed, her on a hired bike). She was knackered and didn't want to ride it back to the shop so I said I would. She disappeared off in the car and I decided to nip back in to the room to curl one out.
As I sat there I heard someone come into the room so I made suitably grunty noises but the owner of the B&B didn't hear my grunted hints and walked straight into the loo.
She was suitably Hyacinth Bouquet and was utterly mortified at walking in on me and apologised again and again, including in front of other guests at breakfast the next morning.
I was in my bedroom wearing my sisters jeans with a scarf and roadie cap on backwards. My mum thought 'no my son has finally become a shallow, deviant who follows cycling fashion' 🙁
found a guy running about the woods in only brogues and a dress shirt!!
this was 3pm on a friday afternoon!!
lordswood for any one local!!
encountered couple having what appeared to be fully clothed sex or just drying humping in middle of single track. literally rode around them through the stinging nettles. 30 minutes later on the way back out they were still there.
Wandered up stairs on eth bus only to find some bloke shagging the back seat. Then had to watch it for the entirity of the journey as the security camera cycled through its images.
A friend answered his door to me whilst seemingly doing up his flies.
His hoover was on, as was his computer (though all windows were minimised).
I didn't ask but he explained that he'd dropped a bowl of crisps under his computer work station so was hoovering them up. errr Okay mate.
saw a couple having carnal fun in a bay window - as they were clearly exhibitionists I stopped passers by and started cheering and offering encouragement eventually they got embarassed and scuttled off when there was about 10 of us. Seen many doggers on night rides.
Oh on getting caught my GF at the time once fell down the stairs drunk on way to the bathroom I went to help her up our flatmates appeared and thought [as we were naked] we were humping in the stairs ...neither of us could rememeber it the next day and it came up when she was complaining about bruises.
When I was about 11 walked in on my parents hard at it 😯 not what you want to see.
I still say the Toyota Yaris I came across in a carpark in the woods. Two girls, one guy inside at it. I almost shouted at them out of jealously.
Jammy Bastid.
the Toyota Yaris I came across
literally?
I went travelling with two mates for a few months, usually staying in one hotel room to keep costs down. Two of us headed to the bar, the other one hung about to "have a shower" and said he'd come and meet us in a bit...
I forgot something, went back to the room.
Frosted glass door panel plus brightly lit hotel room plus dark corridor equals full on silhouette of him cranking one out sat on the end of the bed...
He was a tad shocked when I knocked on the door... I think I may have ruined his rhythm…
Hmm I walked into that one literally..
all 3 were naked, the girls were teens/early 20's as was the lad. How they managed it in there and what they were thinking....heaven knows. All I know is I was bloody jealous!
He's got a Yaris, 2 girls is just Karma
Naked woman on Westminster bridge at 4pm in the afternoon, being pursued by 3 blokes shouting at her in German, trail of clothes leading round County Hall.
In san francisco one lunchtime, loads people walking about or sitting on steps or cafes eating lunch. Notice guy in the middle of the street take his shoe off hold it up in the air then throw it on the ground unzip his fly and get down and start shagging it.
Also saw someone shagging an exhaust pipe on a jeep wagoneer a couple of days later also in san francisco, weird city.
I "happened upon" a naked ramble in the wild hills of Northumberland one day. all old and saggy unfortunately...
what they didn't realise is that further round the hill they were going to meet up with the route of a charity fell run 😈
Brighton beach, saw the naked beach signs. Walked swiftly up the huge shail banking expecting lots of naked students etc....
Yep, it has scrawny, wierd and nasty looking men laying there 😆
Not walked in on but was driving back from a surf trip in devon when an Audi in front was swerving across two lanes repeatedly, this carried on for about 5 mins, was about to flash the guy and give him some abuse when a head popped up from his lap, his girlfriend/wife had obviously been giving him a noshing whilst he was driving, we ended up overtaking him and all four of us in the car were cheering and waving to them as we passed them, they were both a little red faced.
In my previous job as a Gasman I've walked in on some very odd sights! On service visits once we'd finshed the boiler we were supposed to go round the house and walk the heating system. Check the rads, cylinder etc.
One house I'd finished the boiler and asked the owners permission to go round the house and check. He said fine so off I went. Downstairs was fine so off I popped upstairs. Into the study, yep all ok but whoa!!! the room was full of shelves stacked with hardcore gay porn DVDs! Gay straight or whatever you'd have thought the householder would be a bit embarrassed to let you see all this.
As it turns out the next room was a fully equiped S&M dungeon with chains, whips, masks and man size thigh high PVc boots! I did a quick about turn and bottled going into the next room. Not at all what you'd expect in a respectable suburban house!
Going back downstairs I wondered how I was going to face the householder, I couldn't wipe a silly smirk off my face. I think he was more embarrassed than I, but I couldn't help wondering ifhe'd sent me up there on purpose to guage my reaction and to see if I was in The Club so to speak!
Riding through Casa de Campo several years ago when something caught my eye, a white ar5e bobbing away taking pleasue in one of the park's employees!!
On the other side, I got home very late one night, many, many years ago. My parents were upstairs (and upside down house) with some family friends. When they heard me come in, they began singing "we know hat you've been doing!". As they all came down the stairs they stopped open mouthed. I looked down to grass stained knees and grass in the toes of the shoe.
I guess they did know what I had been doing! 😉
I guess they did know what I had been doing!
playing in your den in the back garden?
We were on our way down to the SouthWest a few years ago and my wife accidently dropped an earing down the drivers footwell, I spent a good few minutes telling her to leave it there when a car behind us started swerving from side to side trying to get passed. Eventually they overtook us and shouted things like "corr bet you loved that" and "was it good". Totally bizarre.
they were both a little red faced.
Perhaps she was more than him 😉
playing in your den in the back garden?
Got it in one. 😥
darkcove - He'd probably got a funny idea about what visiting repairmen did after watching some of those DVDs.
Whilst out running on the Ridgeway I cam across a couple having sex and completely naked. I slowed my pace a bit and they were clearly shocked. But they were about to be even more shocked because coming round the corner was a massive group of elderly ramblers.
I mean fancy doing it on the Ridgeway?
A mates friend came home to find her male lodger with pants down and todger in hand asleep with a documentary about submarines on the telly in front of him. His response 'I wasn't *ing to this I was *ing to the tennis earlier 😕
Ohh, I was once riding through some woods in Harrogate and came a cross a little old lady taking a wizz (clearly caught short). She desperately tried to get up and make herself decent whilst her dog (which she was still holding onto) tried to attack my bike and pulled her over.
Exploring some old mining tracks on Dartmoor a few years ago followed one down to a river and stopped there for lunch. 2 girls and a guy appear on the far bank about 50 yards upstream, strip off and have a bit of a skinny dip (it was a lovely day for it).
They didn't seemed phased at all when we crossed the river and shouted a cheery HELLLLOOOOOOOO at them.
lol @ mastiles 😆
House that backed onto ours - the frosted bathroom window was never capable of masking the owner's frequent and vigorous solo sessions in the shower. Same chap never seemed to realise that at night, his open Velux window was usually at the right angle to highlight similar activities when in bed.
Wasn't really a case of walking in on it - rather opening the back door to be greeted by it on too frequent an occasion.
Not walked in on but a girl who used to live next door to us (converted flats backing onto shared yards)...one summer we all had our windows open and she was always very vocal...
When she reached her 'peak' she used to shout (and I mean shout) OH YES I AM COMING I AM COMING YES I AM COMING. Following this.. The amount of times you could hear laughing from around the yard - mainly from men...
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Walking through a nudist beach in the south of france, saw a guy who had found an inventive way to keep his car keys safe. They were on a ring. dangling off the end of his kn0b.
Mastiles -always fun with a couple of mates on a nightride in Harrogate, is to run the descent down the left hand side of Valley gardens past the sun pavilion and the colonnades.
enough to make a grown man blush 😯
Mastiles -always fun with a couple of mates on a nightride in Harrogate, is to run the descent down the left hand side of Valley gardens past the sun pavilion and the colonnades.
I shall have to remember that one 🙂
Not exactly rude but certainly bizarre. Was walking in the Brecon Beacons last August with some friends, the clag had really come in and it had turned into a really miserable cold wet walk, so the last thing we expected to see when we got to the top of Pen Y Fan was a bunch of druids or something preaching to some deity in the driving wind and rain. Utterly bizarre
On a group ride in mid-Wales and as we turned a corner we saw a middle aged (being nice here) lady in high heels, fishnets and a leopard skin dress 'amusing' herself while her partner in crime filmed her using one of those old style (i.e. huge) VHS camcorders.
Would have been less funny except we saw them twice more in more and more remote locations further round our 30 mile route.
Brother came back from a stint off-shore to stay with some mates in Sarf Lahndun. Said mates were very taken with the(semi)naked young lady in the back bedroom of the house that backed onto theirs- you could see right into the room. Brother takes one look, turns pale and marches around to see the young lady- who just happenned to be our half-sister!
Pics please?
not exactly walked in on but.....
Friend of a friend used to work out of Poole on a fishing boat. On the way out to sea one day he needed to lay a pipe so grabbed the usual toilet bucket, and went round the side of the boat outside the cabin and kegs down did the balancing over a bucket at sea manouver.
What he hadn't accounted for though was the ferry packed with tourists that then floated past that side of the boat with hundreds of people laughing and pointing. Mid curl the best he could do was grab some worm ridden newspaper to cover his face. Although it didn't stop him being recognised by some of the tourists in the pub on his return.
Perhaps not quite on topic as I was "walked in on" sort of.
Working outside years back there was no loo in the field we were working in and I needed a dump. It was very foggy so I didn't need to go too far to be out of sight and went about my business a few hundred yards form where we were sited.
Mid dump, the fog just lifted like it hadn't been there just then a farmer on his tractor in the next field, 25 yards away, went past looking at me in horror.
"Morning" I said as I squatted over my steaming log.
Lesbian three way, with stuntc0cks, on a beach in Spain. A Tuesday morning at around 1030.
Which was nice.
