I'm hoping they've devised some special trials:
Crawl through shit wearing inadequate PPE for 17 hours straight - reward is a round of applause and fewer rations for the camp.
Can the rugby guy pick him up and shove his head in a hornet's nest for an hour or two?
Just looked back at the records for Nadine Dorries on Celeb.
Although she was voted out first, she only did 2 trials.
just shows how toxic politics has become in the last 10 years,(or should that be how toxic the Tory has become) that it seems obvious that he will get every single one.
I guess he might even get kept in, so he can be subject to more trials.
and had the whip suspended
Just means that while he can't vote in the division lobbies... he's not a Tory MP.
Once he's out, and they want his vote again, he'll get the whip restored.
We've already had someone regain the whip, and, more bizarrely, become a minister after being on the show.
In the meantime... he needs to be in the public eye to sell his book this Christmas.
One wonders why Johnson has not been punished for being on holiday while parliament sits.
This is his chance to bring the British public together. I’m sure there will be a general reluctance to send him home early (but get no where near winning it) and a huge effort for him to take part in every single task.
I might have to watch it!
This is his chance to bring the British public together. I’m sure there will be a general reluctance to send him home early (but get no where near winning it) and a huge effort for him to take part in every single task.
I might have to watch it!
It's a double-edged sword though. Battling through endless revolting tasks stoically will actually improve his standing. Far better that he has one, truly awful event, breaks mentally and has to run away. Or is voted off immediately without even getting his shower scene.
You're all so uncharitable. I'm sure we're all about to see the real Matt Hancock, and all realise that our perceptions of the government and their ministers has been dreadfully clouded by the nasty things the press writes about them.
Ooh look, magic beans!
Would Tindall have access to a royal pardon if he were to drop kick the scrote into next week?
Hancock obviously came to the conclusion he’d have to wait for at least one more Tory PM before he got a government job again…
https://twitter.com/parody_pm/status/1584643344902549504?s=21
…might as well stay out of the way, make some cash, prepare the ground for a book tour when his book is released after the show.
Of all the diabolical and sometimes litteraly illegal things tory MPs have been up to for that last few years, one gets the whip removed for this??!!
I'll happily clap for a minute whilst he eats dingo's anus.
Hopefully a live dingo for added entertainment.... and teeth, lots of teeth
Would Tindall have access to a royal pardon if he were to drop kick the scrote into next week?
Finding a jury who would be willing to try the case without bias would be tricky.
Shows what he thinks of his constituents and loyalty to the party. Who would want to live in the West Suffolk constituency which gave hime a 23k majority? Might make them think, then again...
He's the new Lembit Öpik.
He’s the new Lembit Öpik.
Cheeky 😉
He’s the new Lembit Öpik.
Speaking of whom, he was on 5Live Drive earlier saying of course an MP should take time out to do reality TV, they work long hours, if people don't agree they don't have to watch it.
I'm not totally sure how the show works, but if the public vote could force him to eat Cock au Kangaroo every night and then evict him on the first vote, I'm good with that.
Even more trickle downs for Matt. Money from the telly whilst drawing his MP's salary, book out at Christmas and once he leaves Westminster he can call in all the PPE favours before they die, go bankrupt, run away. He can then canter off into the distance on a quadruped of the graminivorous variety.
I can't see his book troubling the best seller lists; likely that everyone on his christmas card list will be getting a signed copy - whether or not they want one.
What advance did his publisher pay?
If nothing, that's vfm; anything else is dead money.
Money on whether he wears down Tindal or Babatunde first. I reckon he’s racist / slimy enough to get through the latters comedy persona pretty quickly.
Can’t imagine Boy George will give him an easy time
I could see Jill Scott tearing him a new one - unless he withdraws.
If Jill tears him a new one, will they feed him the old one as part of a bushtucker trial?
Mr hutch - call ITV immediately!
To be fair though, the people who book the guests for the show have played an absolute blinder. All this free publicity and a guarantee that the voting lines will be inundated every day until he leaves. Car crash TV at it's finest.
Edit: today's Wordle is trolling him, surely 🤣
Edit: today’s Wordle is trolling him, surely 🤣
Most of the words that apply to him are only four letters though.
EDIT: Got it in three!
No Wordle spoilers!
Apparently he turned it down twice, before <span style="text-decoration: line-through;">being offered more money than he could carry home in a suitcase </span>having a change of heart.
MoreCashThanDash
I’m not totally sure how the show works, but if the public vote could force him to eat Cock au Kangaroo every night and then evict him on the first vote, I’m good with that.
Nah keep the ****er in until at least the smoothie task!
He should be the subject of a rigorous public inquiry into his part in the mishandling of the pandemic not playing at being a celebrity. In particular the transfer of elderly hospital patients into care homes probably killed thousands of people unnecessarily. Not to mention that his constituents go unrepresented while he swans around lining his pockets.
It's part of the conflation of politics with audience participation light entertainment that's helped to land us with clowns like Johnson and propagated the rise of a generation of Conservative politicians who think the whole thing is some sort of game.
It's tempting to just sneer at him for being a prat, but there are much deeper issues here and a serious political system would see him removed from Parliament for misconduct.
Guy Fawkes did have some good intentions...
In any other job, if you just disappeared for weeks when you felt like it, you'd get the sack. Constituents should have a right of recall in such circumstances.
There will be urgent constituency matters during this period involving housing, benefits and healthcare where normally you'd expect an MP to intervene on your behalf. Tosser.
The prime minister's official spokesman said he believes "MPs should be working hard for their constituents, whether that is in the House or in their constituency".
Ahem, Boris, Ahem.
Ahem, Boris, Ahem.
Boris is currently shilling for crypto, isn't he?
Which is objectively much worse than going on a two-week jolly to munch bollocks.
I think a lot of people are missing a key point here. For a guy who has slid up the Tory party's greasy pole to cabinet level, munching down a few kangaroo anuses au cockroach is pretty much just an amuse-bouche.
If I were Matt Hancock, I'd point out that many tory MPs have second jobs and other interests, including the former leader, and he's doing nothing out of the ordinary. At least he's doing it in the public eye and being up front about it, unlike his peers. I'm more amused than outraged TBH. Strictly next?
Well I see Kezia Dugdale has crawled out her hole to remind us of SLab's support for the Tories as long as it can be used to justify their own idiocy.
*slow clap*
Looks like that's Slab torpedoed for another electoral cycle, good going hen....
There will be urgent constituency matters during this period involving housing, benefits and healthcare where normally you’d expect an MP to intervene on your behalf. Tosser.
To be fair, the MPs staff field most of this, but I agree, he should not be away doing this unless Parliament is in recess.
I got the impression that Sunaks comments covered Boris's little jaunt as well.
The legendary Lembit Öpik speaks...
Resurrecting this thread to celebrate the rats in the sack tearing each other to bits. All the protagonists - what a shameless bunch of horrid bastards!! Keep escalating people!
He wrote a ****ing book to cash-in on the pandemic! Mind boggling.
As much as I despise Matt Hancock - this is a shitty thing to do.
It smacks of the me, me, me society. She's got a story out of it now instead of it being lost in all the other shite the enquiry would throw up. And she's got the money from Matt from writing his book.
And if it was that important for her to share the info - why not publish it before the book was out? Oh yeah, because Matt's payment needed to clear the bank.
Can't see people rushing to her door with private information after this.
