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[Closed] Im getting married..how much is this gonna cost?

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So it looks like im finally tying the knot in August or September next year. Im planning on a max budget of about GBP10k...now i havent a scooby what these things cost, so does this sound sufficient (it'll have to be!)?
It'll be a Church job, roughly 50 people (family and close friends), the usual Reception/food after and a night do with say another 30-40 friends...thinking of maybe a Marquee hire for the Reception and evening do. The budget has to include her dress (purchase), my suit (hire) - what is the routine for Bridesmaids dresses, are they hired or bought, or Best man suit? A photographer as well.

Honeymoon is not included in the budget, we have other arrangements for that.

What sort of budgets have you lot worked to?


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 7:41 am
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£15k+.. at least Go see fiancées parents.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 7:46 am
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Your soul.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 7:49 am
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For what you describe that could be a bit skinny.

However, if £10K is what you can afford it's what you should spend and alter the day rather than put yourself in unreasonable debt. If going the traditional wedding route you are going to have to develop some serious heels to dig in to keep the two of you within budget. The big thing to remember is (and is easy to forget) is what you are panning is getting married rather than a wedding. A wedding last just the day whilst a marriage will hopefully last a little longer.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 7:49 am
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Cloudnine....lets just say that the fiancees parents arent an option.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 7:50 am
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Convert, i hope so to...mind we've been together for 17 years already so thats not really a worry!


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 7:51 am
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It will cost loads, more than you think. Tradition is that bridesmaids dresses and best man/ushers suits are paid for by you. You also need flowers, food, band and/or DJ, shoes, and a whole host of other things that you will forget until you have to pay for them.

It is most certainly doable on the budget you have but as Convert says, you will need to dig your heels in on a lot of things and not buy into the "dream day" crap that empties your wallet.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 7:53 am
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It costs what you want it too.

Our wedding was around 6-8k. It was a church wedding with reception in the local village hall for 110 people. Buffet food at about £15 a head. Bought normal dresses for brides maids, friends made the the wifes dress and the cake. But we had a hired car photographer etc. The best weddings are the budget ones as yhey cotend to concentrate on whats important to the couple, not 'How nice the flowers are'.

Friends have had the 'full works' costing 20, 30 or 40k + but for me they kind of missed the important part where you Actually get married - the cost goes on what is essentialy just a party afterwards.

I suppose what im trying to say is you'll be fine with your budget just spend the money on whats important to you as a couple and you'll really enjoy it.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 7:54 am
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.lets just say that the fiancees parents arent an option

Arrange for her to be adopted then tap up the new parents


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 7:54 am
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We had been together for 11 before actually getting married but it's still too easy to get too caught up in 'tradition' for which read 'pleasing other people' and 'unnecessary handing over of cash'. We went very left field (licensed a cabin at the side of the loch for the day, small marquee/tent just in case it rained, bbq and bonfire & fireworks). I hope we had a day that was memorable and enjoyable for all and was very personal to us - about £7K I think.

Others will have done it for £50 and a bag of chips whilst some will have spunked £25K+.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 7:57 am
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We got married in march, church wedding, 80 people for the day, additional 50 for the night, excluding honeymoon, it cost us just over £15k. We could have cut cost out of it, but at that price our photographer was a close friend we had really good rate with, the flowers were done at trade by the maid of honour, so there was potential for it to be more.

Keep an eye on costs, it's easy for it to snowball. Guideline prices i'd say based on my experience, The church is about £600, dress + adjustments & extras £1.5k, venue & food £6k, flowers £500, photographer £1k, that's £9k before you include cars, suits, bridge maid dresses, shoes, hair, make up, DJ, cake etc etc etc.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 7:58 am
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Mine was less than £350 all in.
Dress was £100 (1992 prices).
Hire of room / bar in local Club was free.
Sandwiches / snacks / desserts around £75 - all on a ,long table, help yourself.
Cake was £50ish. Disco was £75ish
Wedding ceremony was around £40.

And yes, it was great.
You dont need to spend thousands to have a good time. Think what £10k would help you with - I'd sooner have a new kitchen with 10 years of use than one day of indulgence.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 8:01 am
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Weddings in this country are a joke, go abroad.

Two of my friends on very average salaries managed to spend £50,000 on theirs which they are still paying off and is still compromising their married life.

You can have a lovely wedding in Bora Bora for 5k, you get virtually nothing for that here!

Go abroad!


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 8:02 am
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Avoid Franck


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 8:06 am
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Mine was actually about £8k and i got married in a castle.. http://manorbiercastle.co.uk/

Did it different as i invited all my friends and family to the actual wedding with a party in the grounds afterwards for a few hours then had a more intimate much smaller dinner/evening do with about 30 people.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 8:09 am
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Jesus reading this I'm glad I consider it all a load of pseudo religous mumbo jumbo. Honestly, why do you bother, what difference does it make?


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 8:17 am
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I don't think you can say you had a more memorable wedding than someone who spent twice what you did. Plus going abroad is IMHO an opt out which denies your friends from joining the party.

Flowers might not be important to you but to the ladies they make the church and venue much more special. So what I am saying is that you get what you pay for until you start adding in fripperies that don't really matter.

My idea to save money is to have the ceremony at 4pm on a Saturday and then go straight to the venue for a meal and party. You can hire a marquee or hall and everyone comes rather than 1st and 2nd tier guests. Can work really well.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 8:18 am
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You need to save on the hundreds of small things. My wedding cost roughly £8000 (I think, it was paid for by a variety of people). The more stuff you do yourself the more genuinely personal and memorable it will be and if you dont have two left hands it will look just as good.

Invitations - make them yourself and save hundreds. Use fancy card from the craft shop etc. It'll cost you the time of designing it and a few nights together in front of the telly sticking them together.

Favours, place cards and table decorations - the same, do it yourself. I spent the morning of my wedding blowing up balloons and decorating the reception venue with my brother whilst my wife got ready.

Luckily my wife didnt want a white dress and ended up in a red bridesmaid dress. This saved hundreds and was a bit of a talking point!

I didnae pay for everybodys kilt hire. Maybe this was very cheap of me.

Photographer. Loads of average photogs charge thousands and are average. Search around and find an up and coming chap and save a few bob and get great photos. (my brother for example [url= http://www.jamesrobertsonphotography.co.uk/?p=45 ]http://www.jamesrobertsonphotography.co.uk/?p=45[/url])
But if you choose wrong it will be big regret time!

There's loads more you can do - pick your own wine and pay a corkage and get decent value wine rather than expensive venue wine, we spent loads on the celeidh band and just had a cd of our favourite tracks to dance to after, it worked surprisingly well. Cake was modest, if you have a talented friend then you could save much money here. Most of the stuff you can do to save money is fun and you can do it with your partner.

Anyway, save on the small stuff. Pay the big money on the essentials. The essentials are clothes, venue, cars, food, music, photographer, the rest can be saved on.

Oh and i got married in a castle!
[img] [/img]


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 8:23 am
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ours cost about £8000. depends how much crap and tat you want with it all.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 8:34 am
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10k is what we spent excluding honeymoon.The biggest outlay is the venue and food so shop around for them.
Also be aware that budget for the bride's and bridesmaids dresses may stretch a bit when you fiance gets caught up in the mood.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 8:34 am
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Sir, its really up to you. Cut the cloth according to you and your partners finances. If you have 10k stick to it costing 10k. It basically can cost you what YOU both want. You could do it for a few hundred or a few hundred thousands.

I married a Greek last year and we were happy to have a little wedding, small resataurant, but her mum and dad wanted the big fat greek wedding and we ended up in a 5* hotel with 200 guests. it was fab to be honest and thankfully we didnt have to pay for it as it is his only daughter.

As Cilla would say, the choice is all yours chuck.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 8:35 am
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What's an extra £5k when you've given up the rest of your life anyway.

Is it Christmas yet? Bah Humbug!


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 8:37 am
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You could do a perfectly nice registry office do and a good buffet for not much at all or you could spend £100k +

We spent around £6k (well the MiL did) but happened to know a florist, a cake maker, bands, DJ's, photography etc so got an awful lot of things at mates rates.

Would have probably been around £10k for what we did otherwise...


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 8:46 am
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I recommend avoiding the [b]"wedding factory"[/b] type places. They are geared up to rob you of every penny they can.

We got married on a beach (free)in Scotland. It was a humanist wedding (rules vary between Scotland and England about legality of this). I'm not sure if a humanist wedding in England is legally recognised.

We then had reception, drinks and food in a nearby pub/restaurant place. They do amazing food and good beers so we knew the standards would be good but they'd only done a few weddings before and didn't screw us on cost. We had no seating plan and only 80% of the required seats - ace! Makes it more social. My wife had to ask for a chair.

Then we moved on to the local village hall (£120 including clean up). The pub put on a bar and did bacon rolls and cake at the break.

Everything included it cost us £7,000.

* Photographer was a friend
* Borrowed rich friend's cars
* Dress was a £150 "bridesmaid's dress" - looked stunning!
* Band were a bunch of mates
* Bridesmaid's made their own dresses together.
* My family made the cake (they are bakers after all)
* We made all the decorations for the tables and the hall.
* Our friends helped with so much - this is a huge benefit because everyone feels part of it. A nice metaphor for your reltionship and life.

GOOD LUCK! You'll need it.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 8:50 am
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Dress £350
Bridesmaid dresses £180
My suit £160 (which I still use - why on earth do people hire stuff?)
Shirt and tie for father of bride and best man £60
Church £0 (my own)
Reception (we had wedding at 3.30pm, I'm not paying for everyone's dinner!) £350 for 70 people. Everyone who went said it was one of the best receptions they had been too - we asked for BBQ chicken, pizza, sausage on stick, jelly and ice cream - everyone loved it!
Band - friends of ours - free
Bar - everyone paid for own drinks.
Car - friend - free
Rings -mine £70 (cheapest ti one I could find), hers £20.
Cake - £50. Made it ourselves from a customized MandS cake - 3 tier!
Photographer - £100. Only thing I wish we'd spent more on as photos ended up being poor. Should have gone with someone else who was recommended who was £300.

Around £1k 10 years ago and so many great memories. And no money owed afterwards too!


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 8:54 am
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Married in a castle too. Brilliant day, we took the approach of just having immediate families there, loved every second of it.

Mrs O's wedding car was £5 - but he did clean it especially.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 8:57 am
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The wedding industry survives on the myth that everything connected to the wedding must be bespoke and 'special', even stuff that nobody gives a whatnot about.

TBH, it entirely depends on the attitude of your other half. If she's after the full princess experience, then yes, it will cost you a packet. If she's more realistic and doesn't want to hand over vast sums of your money on planners, flowers and embroidered place names at the reception, then your budget should be more than enough.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 8:58 am
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£10k is plenty. We had a budget of about £15k and £5k of that went on the honeymoon, as we felt like treating ourselves.

Many of our guests have commented on how nice the wedding was, how relaxed it was and how it seemed like we had put a lot of thought into it because our personalities came through in it.
I think that's the key; have a think about what you want. Don't just follow the magazines/wedding fayre/shop ideas about what your wedding 'should' be.

can you get friends to help with certain bits like invites/table layouts etc?
We did something that worked really and had lots of people talking during the evening; we put £500 behind the bar, but then gave all the bar staff coins for tossing. The guests had to order their drinks, then call heads or tails. If they won, they got their drinks on the tab and if they lost they had to pay for them. It was a real talking point and made the money go a lot further.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 8:59 am
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Many of our guests have commented on how nice the wedding was, how relaxed it was

This was the key thing for us. If my wife had spent months in the run-in and on the day fretting about tiny details, rather than just having a great time with friends, the day would not have gone well at all.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 9:01 am
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We had a church wedding and reception for 120 people which cost only a little more than that. Money saving tips we used:

Choose a reception that lets you BYO. We got all the wine and champagne from France.
Find a family member or friend with a nice car and use that for the bride
Family friend did the photography
Made our own cake
Hired the suits
Invitations bought off ebay


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 9:03 am
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We spent £4.5k 14 years ago. My sister spent £40k 10 years ago. We both had a good time and the memories are the same. Choice is yours, but we couldnt contemplate spending money we didnt have or have to ask for.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 9:04 am
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for 10k you'll be pushing it for what you want....

Buy the flowers yourself from a fruit and veg market. we did this, I went at 5am, still cost a lot of money, 300 quid or so, my mum and sister did the arrangements.

our friend DJ'd for a hundred quid, my wifes dad plays in a and, so they played, just had to slip the other band member 100 quid

we got a good deal on the photgrapher, as my wifes friend did a photography coure with him, it was still 600 quid.

we did the invites ourselves.

we spent 15k, for a nice hotel wedding, 3 course meal for 60 people, party for 100 or so in the evening.

biggest costs were dress (about a grand) her ring (700 quid) and meal was about 4k :-/ brilliant day though, we had a blast


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 9:05 am
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If parents / friends / professionals get involved you will be way over budget.
Be brutal about who you want to invite
Keep it simple and intimate - they are by far the best and most fun weddings.
My step son got married in a Tee-pee in a lavendar field in Hitchen. I is what they wanted ... so great

And the people who don't like you wedding shouldn't have been invited !!


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 9:14 am
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Scary sums here a lot of £7k to £10k. Making me scared of when/if my daughter gets married. Might have to go into hiding.....


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 9:15 am
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Don't let people milk you. Don't tell anyone you're organising a wedding, tell them it's a party.

It depends on how obsessed you and your fiance(e) are with all the trimmings. The trimmings are all total bollocks invented to steal your cash.

All you need for a wedding is a room, an official, family, friends, food and booze. Nothing else. That should make it good. If not, get some better friends and leave the family out 🙂

£10k far better spend on a massive post-wedding holiday I reckon (don't call it a honeymoon otherwise you'll be doing a load of soppy shit that costs 10x more than a proper holiday)


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 9:17 am
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Ours was maybe 5 grand. We had some nice stuff, we had some stuff bought for us. We had a late weeding so we only had a late meal and no evening do. 20 people but at a really nice place.

It's really mental how much you can spend on a wedding. If you're set on spending £10k and you're fine with that, it's do able, you just have to make sure you don't get carried away with the little things. If people say to spend more because it should be the happiest day of your life, they're talking sh1t, as long as you're marrying the person you want and the people you want are there you'll both love it.

The little things that cost the money at our wedding I hardly remember, if at all.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 9:19 am
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We got married in August, here's a breakdown of our costs:

Honeymoon £4,492.80
Rings £2,182.00
Drinks (free bar) £1,985.12
Food (65 people) £3,993.00
Accomodation £1,220.00
Band £725.00
Barn hire £2,535.00
Photographer £630.00
Clothes £1,460.00
Hair + Makeup £390.00
Flowers £162.60
Guitarist £170.00
Registrar £390.00
Misc £800.00

SUM £21,135.52

The wife bought the flowers from a wholesaler an did the arrangements herself, she also did all the decorations, invites, menus etc. I did the lighting for the band. The PA came with the Venue which we got half price for a late booking on a Friday. We did a free bar, alcohol bought through a local independent wine merchant. Photographer was a work colleague.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 9:21 am
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£900 all in for us 18 months ago. 8)
It was a registry office, but that included the cost of the dress, hire of the Local village hall for 50 guests, dress, food, Bar and drinks, music, evening buffet, everything... If I look back I have no idea how we managed it. We prepped it all ourselves, just the two of us. The family mucked in to clear up at the end of the day, but we had planned to do it all ourselves...

We were knackered at the end of a fantastic day, but if we hadnt done it that way we would still be saving for the day now.

And sitting outside on the hall steps, looking up at the stars once everyone had gone, and we were waiting for a mate to drive us back in his Taxi ( i did say we did the whole thing for under a grand!) was just perfect!

we were skint mind, if we had 10 grand to spare we could, and would have upgraded!


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 9:21 am
 Yak
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5k all in including the honeymoon back in 2005.
50 people in a farm-hotel venue. Everything we wanted and none of the trimmings we didn't want. Great day with family and friends!

Write a list, allocate a budget and stick to it.
That's it.

It was a bit of hard work in the run-up as we weren't that organised. I made the cake and did some other bits and pieces in the run-up as I took some time off work. My best man had also flown in from Australia, and I had promised him a week of climbing before the wedding, which we also did 🙂 .

Anyway - all worked fine and everyone had a great time!


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 9:32 am
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Rule #1 - [b]do not mention the word WEDDING when booking a place[/b] - use "family function" instead

Ours was about £15k, inc. the honeymoon.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 9:42 am
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Not sure what our cost - but it was less than 10k.

Invites were hand made by us.
Reception for 130 people in a village hall (cost about £250 to hire)
Meal was a BBQ - think I spent about £500 on Steak/Chicken/Sausages in Costco
We paid for all the drink - the beer all came from ASDA (3 crates for £20 deal)
the wine came from the local Threshers - buy 2 get one free + sale or return.
DJ was about £400
Suits were from M&S - £100 each
Etc....

You don't have to spend a fortune - provided you are a bit creative and don't mind doing a bit of work yourselves.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 9:59 am
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Scary sums here a lot of £7k to £10k. Making me scared of when/if my daughter gets married. Might have to go into hiding.....

Your issue will be that your daughter will expect far more than that ... Weddings are no longer about the celibration of two live coming together but a short union of two people so that they have a personal Prom. The world has gone mad. The average wedding now costs around 15k. The average marriage lasts 7.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 10:29 am
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Less is more. The least enjoyable weddings I have attended were the church and hotel reception types. Too formal. Much more expensive.

Mine was church then reception in parents house and (admittedly large) garden. No marquee. Food was a mixture of home cooked and buffet by caterer. Booze was large carry out. No band. Entertainment was conversation. The table tennis was out in the garden at one point though. Wife made her own wedding dress.

My brother hired a local council owned hall. A friend's brother who was a minister did the marriage at the hall. Hired a band. Drove load of wine and beer home from Luxembourg where he was working. Buffet dinner. Bride did flowers for the venue after going to the flower market. The wedding car was a black hackney from the venue to fairly local hotel before going away the next day.

There is nothing wrong with big hotel wedding if that is what the couple want and the couple or their family can afford it. Going into serious debt for a wedding is madness though.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 10:48 am
 iolo
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It will cost half of everything you own and loss of your house.
You'll get to see the kids once a month.
The divorce lawyers these days are taking the mickey with their fees too.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 10:53 am
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Mine cost just over 11k
75 people there for day and evening, married in a converted barn in Essex. Bbq style meal (actually cost more than a conventional sit down meal)
Dress was about 1k
Suit hire for me and 2 others from moss bros was about 400 I think.
Photographer was 1k
We made some of the table decoration stuff.
It doesn't have to cost a fortune and to be honest we could of done it less than that. I think the 3 main things to have right are the venue, food and photographer.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 10:55 am
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ive just booked for 2015.

5k has got the venue - country house overlooking the water and food for 80 folk + 50 night guests

band was 1k

Hoping for it to be under 10k all told - as thats what id saved for it.

as long as its a good time for all and not much more ill survive but ill not be borrowing to pay for it - some of the weddings ive been to have been at the expense of parents remortgaging houses and shit. - id rather just go to a registrars and sign the paperwork for peanuts than have a flash wedding if we were not able to.

for me its about bringing our families together for a party tbh - we live all over the world and only time we all get together at once is for weddings or funerals.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 11:20 am
 grum
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Probably knocking on 5 grand all in - wedding and reception for around 120 at a beautiful village hall, amazing buffet, bands, DJ, photographer - most of whom were mates. Me and the best men all just wore nice suits. We had an amazing day and lot of people said it was one of the best weddings they've been to as it was informal and relaxed.

I've photographed quite a few weddings and the nicest ones by far have been the ones that are a bit unusual and quite relaxed, and where friends/family have got involved in making/doing stuff. Feeling like you 'have' to do/buy all sorts of stuff is a recipe for a stressful yet dull wedding, IMO.

Do what you want not what's expected of you.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 11:34 am
 LHS
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We worked it out it would cost between £15k and £20k for the wedding we wanted and number of people in the UK. Went to the Alps and did it for £12k, including renting a chalet for a week.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 11:44 am
 grum
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With foreign weddings though you are 'saving' money by passing on the cost onto your guests. Seems a bit cheeky to me and excludes/puts pressure on people with less money.

Unless you only know rich people I suppose.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 11:48 am
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This is a scary thread 😯
Luckily my OH knows she won't be getting more than a registry office and a two for one at the pub 😉


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 11:53 am
 wl
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I'd go £1,000 wedding and £9,000 honeymoon. Anything else is nuts.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 12:35 pm
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My business partner got married and we did it - church, meal for 50 people and party - for under £3k - basically by roping everyone in to help out. Luckily Nicola could make all the dresses, we have lots of practical friends and I have a nice barn so the costs were mainly materials and food. One of my favourite bits was a friend who brewed 120 bottles of elderflower wine as his wedding gift.

I wrote it up [url= http://www.makepiece.com/pages/Nicola-and-Daves-Wedding_1.aspx?pageid=260&catId=5 ]here[/url].

[img][url= http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7362/10960707374_a02941a2c3.jp g" target="_blank">http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7362/10960707374_a02941a2c3.jp g"/> [/img][/url]
[url= http://www.flickr.com/photos/68631407@N03/10960707374/ ]Weddingbarn[/url] by [url= http://www.flickr.com/people/68631407@N03/ ]BeateKubitz[/url], on Flickr[/img]


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 12:36 pm
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+1

However, if £10K is what you can afford it's what you should spend and alter the day rather than put yourself in unreasonable debt. If going the traditional wedding route you are going to have to develop some serious heels to dig in to keep the two of you within budget. The big thing to remember is (and is easy to forget) is what you are panning is getting married rather than a wedding. A wedding last just the day whilst a marriage will hopefully last a little longer.

If your budget is 10k, maybe plan for 9k. If possible you can use 1k on the honeymoon but more likely that will cover the costs you don't think about upfront.

My wedding cost around 8k. I can go into details if you want. Here are some pics to show just what we did. If I was to get married again I don't think I would change it. Other than perhaps pick a day when my wife wasn't ill! We also had coaches take us to a nightclub that we had booked out for an afterparty but no photos from that.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/96268906@N05/sets/72157634957121163/

Edit - A lot of this was possible through friends rather than paying full price. The sound systems for the reception and the afterparty were both owned by friends so were free, we sorted out a deal for the club, the photographer was a friends brother so was practically free (£400 for over 12 hours!), my wifes dress was made by friends so was cheaper, our friends TAPT did the design, printing, made the ties & waistcoats and made the amendments to the suits - They also lent us the back drops, bunting and invites made by us, bands were all sourced through friends so were cheap, about 12 friends all deejayed for free, Half price prosecco and a pound corkage per bottle meant we could have bubbly on the boat rather than fork out loads on crap champagne at the reception venue. Chutney and biscuits made by some friends. The list goes on.

Don't mention wedding, PUSH for deals. Think about it sensibly rather than getting carried away or checking other prices.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 12:37 pm
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With foreign weddings though you are 'saving' money by passing on the cost onto your guests. Seems a bit cheeky to me and excludes/puts pressure on people with less money.

People will choose to come or not, sometimes a good way to keep numbers down. Plus I only know rich people. 🙂


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 1:59 pm
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You could easily do it for <10k. Depends where you want to spend the money.

We (well in laws) admittedly spent more than that in June but we had 110 guests.

Some ideas:
[*]Our two biggest costs by a mile were venue and food. We have been to weddings where instead of a sit down meal a hog roast was provided which was perfectly good. That could save dosh. Venue wise, if you're willing to be flexible on dates then could try booking a cancellation slot.
[/*]
[*]Booze - if you go to a venue try to find somewhere with a corkage allowance and buy your own. Aldi champagne - £13, Prosecco £7 for reception and speeches. Our table wine was actually more expensive than the sparkly as we got from a vineyard in france we have visited. We also didn't offer a free bar.[/*]
[*]Flowers - see if you can get a wholesalers to buy direct from - should be better price than florists. We did ours for about £400 and arranged them ourselves the day before. Took a few hours with bridesmaids helping[/*]
[*]Dress - i'm no expert but my wife's dress was fantastic. She found it for £25 in a charity shop (shame she also bought £700 dress but decided at last minute she preferred her £25 back-up!)[/*]

Hope it helps!


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 2:40 pm
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We took a similar approach as grum and £5k all in for us. Again personal, relaxed bit quirky with a retro theme and everyone said how special it was.

Church wedding and we used the church hall for evening do. My wife's aunt did the catering for about 75 (she does this for hunts on an estate) and everyone loved the food. Cakes made by my mum and wife's friends. Booze was shipped over from France. Dress was from a vintage shop cost after cleaning £100 (photographer was raving about it all day). Suits all hired. Photographers were about £500 and they were top quality. Decorated venues with friends. Had a ceilidh in the evening. Honeymoon was about £700 for a cottage in Yorkshire. Was great to be able to pay for it without getting into debt too.

Don't get caught up in spending loads. Make it personal decide what things you would really like and don't worry about the rest. Make sure your guests get some good food and more important is having a good time together with your family and friends. If you can get them involved them it does really help make people feel part of your day.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 2:47 pm
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We got married in the Saddleworth Hotel, the main selling point being that they specialized in weddings and you had sole use of the venue. It was perfect in every way and the owner is fastidious over the smallest detail.

We paid £1000 Hire
Then i think about £86 per day guest (however that included a 5 course 3 AA rosette restaurant meal, a rolls royce silver phantom drop top wedding car, DJ, flowers, reception drinks etc)
and then £14 per evening guest. We had about 35 day and 35 extra for the evening which worked well as you got chance to actually socialise with those you invited as oppose to some weddings which are so huge you get to see the B&G for maybe 30 seconds.

That was about £5K all in, plus £750 for hand made dress, £150 suit hire for gents and we made the invites and had a friend as photographer who was about £600 for the day including electronic copies of hundreds and hundreds of pictures.

Just over £2K on the honeymoon (saved over £1500 by booking the cheapest room then bunged the woman on the front desk $100 dollars to upgrade us which she willingly did)

I would have happily had a BBQ in the garden but its all about the wife at the end of the day and its her day to feel special.

Most importantly save and pay for it so you can start married life debt free, plus pay off debts other than mortgage if you have one first. If you havent got it dont spend it as the stress at the start of married life wont be worth it


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 3:21 pm
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I got married in September, our initial budget was 10k but all in it cost ~14k. We could have probably saved in places, the day was however, magical. We were lucky to have the whole day in one venue and my uncle providing the photography as a gift.

It can be done cheaply, there will be arguments in the planning stages.
Try not to mention to suppliers that it's for a wedding and it works out cheaper 😉


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 3:45 pm
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We were a bit screwed with the pretending it's not a wedding game. August BH, outdoor Barn - no one would believe it was anything else...


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 3:51 pm
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We're getting married next Nov and have been quoted £7k for venue hire, food and drinks (90 people day & night). We're hoping to come in under £10k so need to do invites, rings, dress, photographer and band/dj for less than £3k so we're looking to save where we can.

It depends on your venue but you can save a huge chunk depending on the time of year you get married. I think Oct - Mar (ex Xmas) are generally cheaper.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 4:36 pm
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If i could guarantee snow and sun id happily get married in winter.

Odds on for driech weet and grey.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 4:38 pm
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We're getting married next Nov and have been quoted £7k for venue hire, food and drinks (90 people day & night). We're hoping to come in under £10k so need to do invites, rings, dress, photographer and band/dj for less than £3k so we're looking to save where we can.

It depends on your venue but you can save a huge chunk depending on the time of year you get married. I think Oct - Mar (ex Xmas) are generally cheaper.

Obviously everyone has their own tastes so this might not suit, but I think you should be fine.

Photographer - haggle. Or I'm sure you know someone handy with a camera.
Invites - make yourself. Probably still £200 on materials though.
Rings - My wifes was >£30 from Amazon, mine was made for me by a friend so it was free.
Hers was a corset made by a dressmaker - £150 (£40 on materials), and simple skirt made by her mum
Band/DJ again free. Surely you know a few people who could do this. It would probably be cheaper to buy some soundlab PA speakers and amp from Maplins than hire a PA. Also some disco lights!

Admittedly I am pretty lucky with knowing people who can provide me with things, but all it takes is a bit of forum trawling and I'm sure you can find some people to help for half the price of people advertising.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 5:31 pm
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Got married at a hotel that did deals on the rooms. 37 close friends and family, sit down spread for 37 people, no evening do or music.

Mother in law/godmother did the flowers, god father provided the brides transport (was head honcho of the 2CV owners club 😳 ), my mum made the cake, wifes uncle iced it, one bridesmaid, cost less than the £4.5k honeymoon

Edit: the subsequent cost, both financial and emotional has been beyond calculation mind....


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 5:58 pm
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We apparently paid £500 for chair covers we'd never own 😯


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 6:14 pm
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We got married this year, think it was between 5 & 6k.

Church wedding, 40 guests
Evening do was an extra 30 guests.

My mate used his MkI RS2000 Escort as the wedding car. I know a photographer, so got a decent discount there. My OH has a friend with a cake business so that was taken care of.

We used Loweswater village hall for the evening do, beautiful setting, cheap as chips too. The local sports committee supplied the bar, all profits go to local causes and drink was cheap too.

We had a 3.00pm wedding, shorter day = less £££. Rather than a wedding breakfast we just had the evening meal, used the local butcher and had a hog roast.

Most expensive cost was the band we hired but they were top notch.

One bridesmaid kept costs down too.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 6:29 pm
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Don't get caught up in spending loads. Make it personal decide what things you would really like and don't worry about the rest. Make sure your guests get some good food and more important is having a good time together with your family and friends. If you can get them involved them it does really help make people feel part of your day.

This.

One of the best things we did - hire a marquee and stick in my parents garden (with not a great deal of room to spare) - then did a booze run to France which meant that no-one had to dig into their pocket throughout the evening. Block booked a number of the closest bed and breakfasts (a number of which were run by family friends) so that people travelling could walk and didn't have to worry about designated drivers or taxis...


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 6:37 pm
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Wrightyson Think the co-ordinator got the jist when he said - chair covers to make the chairs look nice for the day guests would be 6 quid a chair + fitting - when i turned round quick and said 480quid plus fitting for a chair covers - that folks hang their jackets over in the first 10 minutes , i dont think we will need that.

He then tended to glass over frivilous extras after that,


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 6:51 pm
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Photographer - £100. Only thing I wish we'd spent more on as photos ended up being poor. Should have gone with someone else who was recommended who was £300.

🙄

Some people just never learn... I've photographed hundreds of weddings and absolutely agree that money is not the defining factor in a successful wedding. The happiest weddings I've attended are, as Grum mentioned, usually a bit quirky or different. It's the people that make it or break it though - of you invite 50 old relatives with no sense of fun or energy, your wedding will be crap. I wish I'd invited more mates and fewer rarely seen relatives (not that my wedding was crap, it wasn't!).


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 7:02 pm
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Ours cost £92, paid to the registrar in cash in a brown envelope ("sorry, cash only, no cheques or cards"). Also cost another couple of quid for the train ticket to work afterwards.

We couldn't stop laughing at the gushing registrar going on about our happy event "come on luv, hurry it up, I've a train to catch and the kids are bored".

Best buy under a hundred quid I've ever had. (though I think she paid).

Do it for a grand and put the rest into the mortgage.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 7:49 pm
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Mine cost about £1000.
We picked everybody up and dropped them off about 30 during the day, paid for all the food, wine and beer during the day. Had fireworks. Then hired a room for the evening do and put on finger food/nibbles. A wedding night in a local hotel, then off to the old dungeon ghyll for a few nights.
Been 14 years now


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 7:52 pm
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Our's was about 2k if you include me buying a posh suit and shoes that I then wore daily for the next two years. Registry office close family only meal in local bistro . Evening party in church hall with dj pa and buffet . Wifes "wedding" dress was a nice party dress from Harvey Nick's sale for 100 quid . The only flowers were her bouquet and my button hole picked from our garden. We decorated the hall with candles in jars and balloons ourselves in the afternoon. Photos were done by mates with decent cameras. We had a personal very happy day no debt and 5 years on I am sure my memories of our day are as special as anyone else's .

It ain't about the ring the dress or the party it's all about the girl.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 10:49 pm
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What Crankboy said. Pretty much the same here. I think ours was £1800. Got my suit from M&S, wife got a 'party' dress from Debenhams, £100 ish. Registry office, 34 guests at a nice country pub, everyone had a disposable camera while my son did some 'artistic' shots, my sister made 5 MASSIVE chocolate cakes & everyone had a fab day.

No need to go mad IMO, you'll only be lining someone else's pocket.


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 11:11 pm
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we had a hotel do, max 20 guests - immediate family only, really

I paid for the hire of the hotel for the day, registrar, civil ceremony, daytime reception, my suit, wine, photographer, honeymoon. came to less than £5k. Was a pretty fancy hotel mind. www.langleycastle.com

Mrs_d's parents paid for the flowers, her dress hire & our stay in the hotel for 2 nights - no idea how much that cost

when the wine ran out (fixed budget) my sister bought a load more - thanks sis.

no evening do - not necessary for < 20 people, we just said "there's the bar"


 
Posted : 20/11/2013 11:36 pm
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Venue for food dance ect could cost in excess of £15,000, i am a professional 2 rosette chef of 23 yeaars who has cooked for Royalty (regal and Elton)£4000 of that would be exclusive use ,i did my wedding in a michelin star restaurant all in including photographer for £900 .i did call in favors, however we could get the price down, think mid week or Monday,think out of season ? beach in late early year ?many possibilitys especially on the food PM for menus and prices ?? check out my current soon to be last Hotel "The Gallivant hotel Camber " we are beach but i can work anywhere ?.com


 
Posted : 21/11/2013 12:09 am
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That used to be "the place". Was quite good.


 
Posted : 21/11/2013 12:32 am
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I'm conditioned by my job to suggest splashing out on a decent photographer but I'm honestly gobsmacked at what many of you have budgeted for photographs of one of the most important days of your life. Disposable cameras? Friends? Relatives? £100?!! I do realise that many people don't give a tinker's toss about photographs but surely some creative, timeless images of your wedding day should be high up in the list of priorities?

And whilst I'm belly-aching, this thread has turned into a one-upmanship competition to determine who has managed to spend the least. Human rituals are as important today as they were when we were still sacrificing goats. Not something to be ashamed of... At least buy a decent goat.


 
Posted : 21/11/2013 12:48 am
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We hired a villa in Tuscany and had my folks and bro, and her folks and sister there for a week. Got married in Lucca in an 18th C palace then went down to Amalfi coast for honeymoon. Neither of us wanted a big white wedding with people, just our nearest and dearest. Had a blast.

When we came back we hired a village hall, did our own music, food, toys games and a massive bouncy castle. Again, roaring success and had a blast.

Don't do anything to impress others, do what you want and enjoy yourselves.


 
Posted : 21/11/2013 1:04 am
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User-removed I'm not seeking to slag off your industry just pointing out that the human ritual of publicly committing to your partner does not need to be an exercise in conspicuous consumption nor a cash harvesting exercise for a dedicated industry.

If I wanted to brag about cheapness I'd have mentioned other weddings eg. Paid for the registry office non wedding dress from a catalogue . Meal in a Chinese no presents buy your own food then on to the pub.


 
Posted : 21/11/2013 7:37 am
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Been to many weddings where unlimited cash seemed to have been thrown at the things (including a wedding where the wedding present to the bride and groom from the bride's father was a brand new Aston Martin) - but all of them pretty bland really, not that memorable and blend into each other.

The wedding we went to which really stood out from the rest was the simplest and cheapest. Hire of boat on lake for ceremony, followed by marquee on the lake shore with good food, free beer, fine wine and a DJ. Very simple, the most personal and all that was needed for a good time.


 
Posted : 21/11/2013 9:08 am
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Ours was 12k with fancy venue, sit down meal, designer dress (my suit was from debenhams though!), hired two boats, loads of booze, evening buffet. Missus is creative though o we did loads of the decorating etc ourselves. So loads of room to cut costs. 10k is plenty if you avoid champagne, wedding cars, favours, a billion bridesmaids, suits for best man, get a mate to do photography etc. If in marquee just buy loads of booze from the supermarket, been to plenty of great weddings with pie and peas on instead of a fancy meal. Nice surroundings, people you actually want to spend the day with, dancing, good (but not necessarily expensive) food, job done (DO NOT suggest scrimping on the dress though!)


 
Posted : 21/11/2013 9:48 am
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