I have cold hard ev...
 

MegaSack DRAW - This year's winner is user - rgwb
We will be in touch

[Closed] I have cold hard evidence

16 Posts
14 Users
0 Reactions
112 Views
Posts: 0
Free Member
Topic starter
 

that my immediate superviosr/boss person thingy has been gaslighting me. Written documentation with my tasks to do, that conflict with what she says she told me to do. I've now been told I don't listen to her, can't remember what she said or can't follow verbal tasks (seeing as I worked in ktichens for 5 years, I'm pretty sure that I can). I do not remember her telling me to do these things differently.

Should I kick off with HR seeing as she won't accept that it is her problem that the written instructions differ?

I'm getting pissed off now and feel that I can no longer carry out my job effectively as this seems to be happening quite regularly. This kind of crap is also going to get me fired and the slowly mountaing rage is either going to kill me/get me fired/or have me on the 6 o'clock news.


 
Posted : 12/06/2014 2:45 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Record all conversations, then play them back to her, stay calm and use your male superior brain power.


 
Posted : 12/06/2014 3:01 pm
Posts: 17998
Full Member
 

Special sauce?


 
Posted : 12/06/2014 3:07 pm
Posts: 9
Free Member
 

Go speak to a union rep before discussing it with anyone.
No one will come out of this smelling of roses if you do go further with it.
Or leave.


 
Posted : 12/06/2014 3:09 pm
Posts: 41395
Free Member
 

Don't record without agreement - it can be seen as a breach of trust.


 
Posted : 12/06/2014 3:12 pm
Posts: 12079
Full Member
 

If you've got written instructions and you've followed them, it'll come down to your word against hers about any verbal updates - not a good place to be. I'd make a point of sending her an email any time she changes her mind, asking for confirmation as it's clearly different to what was previously asked for.

Speaking to a rep (assuming you have one) wouldn't be a bad idea, either. Recording the conversation sounds pretty dodgy though, I'd avoid that!


 
Posted : 12/06/2014 3:12 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
Topic starter
 

I think I will find another job....yay for a 6 month gap in my CV as a recent graduate.

Record all conversations, then play them back to her, stay calm and use your male superior brain power.

Part of me wants to do this and come into my 6 month performance review with this t-shirt on, a pair of raybans, an insane grin on my face and an Oxford educated lawyer friend. At least it would be entertaining, for all of the 5 minutes that I'd still be allowed on site. You know what they said in mash, anger turned inwards is depression, anger turned sideways is hawkeye.

[img] [/img]

But I've grown up now, I'm married and everything....gotta keep my trap shut for the rest of my life whilst my soul slowly rots to it's core.


 
Posted : 12/06/2014 3:34 pm
Posts: 2390
Free Member
 

its


 
Posted : 12/06/2014 4:12 pm
Posts: 77691
Free Member
 

Gaslighting?


 
Posted : 12/06/2014 4:15 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
Topic starter
 

its

👿


 
Posted : 12/06/2014 4:19 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Gaslighting?

I was wondering the same. Whenever I read a new word on the internet it tends to refer to some weird sexual practise so I don't like to ask.


 
Posted : 12/06/2014 4:48 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gaslighting


 
Posted : 12/06/2014 5:15 pm
 Drac
Posts: 50457
 

I was wondering the same. Whenever I read a new word on the internet it tends to refer to some weird sexual practise so I don't like to ask.

[img] [/img]


 
Posted : 12/06/2014 5:38 pm
Posts: 1343
Free Member
 

Every days a school day!!


 
Posted : 12/06/2014 6:24 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
Topic starter
 


 
Posted : 12/06/2014 11:10 pm
Posts: 0
 

mogrim - Member

If you've got written instructions and you've followed them, it'll come down to your word against hers about any verbal updates - not a good place to be. I'd make a point of sending her an email any time she changes her mind, asking for confirmation as it's clearly different to what was previously asked for.

Speaking to a rep (assuming you have one) wouldn't be a bad idea, either. Recording the conversation sounds pretty dodgy though, I'd avoid that!

Pretty much it your word against hers and they will generally go with the managers word. You ned to manager her now. Get all your instructions orders in written form and any changes amended so in writing - if she wont furnish them to you email her back and have a tracable trail to follow.

You'll either find she gives you one email and lays off you or starts to snow herself under micromanaging you. Talking to a rep is not going to hurt at vall but dont mention it to co workers /managment. I fouy feel it warrants it keep a log/diary of the conflicting instructions etc.


 
Posted : 13/06/2014 6:31 am
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Had the same problem.

My female manager was nuts. Her word and against mine. She always used emotion than logic
and accused me of lying when another manager was a witness for me.

I got by: I never had meetings with her during her period - no joke but it worked!

Changed managers via H.R. & my current manager is awesome!


 
Posted : 05/07/2014 7:57 am