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That man being, er, me. And when I say 'everything' I don't mean I'm dripping in yachts, sports cars and luxury ski chalets, I just mean that I'm comfortably off, don't really need anything and, anyway, I'm not really that interested in 'stuff'.
However, it's my birthday at the end of next month and MrsIHN has asked if there's anything I'd like and I'm a bit stumped, cos, well, see above.
So, I thought I'd tap into the intellectual might of the forum to come up with some ideas.
Let's say a budget of up to £100. Off you go...
Coke.
Decent hooker for 15 minutes
Coaching session or a class of some sort would be my first choice I guess
How shit are your riding skills? A coaching session?
Some kind of experience? Gig? Comedy club? Spa day? Go-karting? Etc.
Donation to keep STW going?
My parents, being right good Christians, when it comes to their birthdays, always make us buy a goat, or a tent, or a well, or something, via Christian Aid or Tear Fund, for people less well-off in less well-off countries.
Or, find a local cycling group/club that sponsors up and coming youngsters, and donate to them?
Really: Just an epic evening out with her, as that is what is important.
Tickets to a comedy show?
Monthly subscription to Cocoa Runners - https://cocoarunners.com/subscribe/
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massage
Just go out with your wife / family whatever. Have an ice-cream. Go large on the fries. Have a starter and desert.
Decent hooker for 15 minutes
15 minutes? That long!?
Donation to charity?
In the donation vein as mentioned above:
+ you get a nice little certificate with a picture of your twinned toilet to put by your own
art, commission something from binners
Forge session. Make a thing out of hot metal.
Decent hooker for 15 minutes
Why would you want to pay for 10 minutes of chat?!?
Had this conversation with Mrs Noise before my recent birthday. Usually I do a list but genuinely this time couldn't think of anything I actually wanted or needed.
She wouldn't entertain the idea of not getting me anything so I've ended up with a day hunting with Harris Hawks and doing various other falconry bits. Which is actually pretty cool.
How about a bottle of nice whisky?
Cheers all, keep 'em coming.
Skills course - my skills are undoubtedly crap, but not too the extent that I care enough to pay someone to make me a bit less crap
Art - yeah, thinking about that (but, although I love the baldy crayon jockey dearly, Binbins' stuff doesn't really do it for me)
Charity - without wishing to sound like a dick, we give quite a lot already
Hooker - I can see the appeal for MrsIHN to pay someone else for me to disappoint sexually for once
Whisky - I think I'll probably get a bottle anyway
Subscription - hmm, interesting, although chocolate is wasted on me, I'll shovel a bar of Dairy Milk in my gob and be happy
Tracksaw
I mean, I appreciate the input, but I need a torch about as much as I need a dead doll.
I think this is the perfect reason to get one of those instant tubeless repair kits...
The aluminium ano ones with the tubeless plugs with brass spikes... Erm.... Dynaplug... That's it..
I don't mind spending money on myself, but couldn't face spending that on a small bit of kit..
But... Perfect present from someone else.
And, they ARE ruddy useful!
Get that, a top up plug kit, and 8 minutes with a hooker
DrP
If there’s nothing you need, make a useful contribution to society, STW?!!
https://www.thepackhorsehayfield.uk
Go for a meal here. (we haven't been yet but by all accounts its cracking)
I am in the same boat as you for this year.. Don't want or need anything however as it's the "big" birthday I'm being asked what, where etc. Frankly a nice meal with good company will do.
When people have absolutely insisted they get me a present I've gone for stuff like chains, chainrings, bottom brackets, brake pads or whatever will come in useful. Or tools - bearing presses, new hex key set, headset press - things you get by without but having the right tool can just make it easier.
Forge session. Make a thing out of hot metal.
I think we may have a winner...
Sponsor an endangered species - the bicycle commuter. You'll get two GPX files of my daily commutes (typically 5 days a week but not guaranteed) for 3 month's along with the occasional photo and short text when inspiration strikes.
Today:
I overtook a man slowly driving a mini digger up the dirt track at the back. I surprised his colleague who was walking further up the track. Nearer to work the road was almost blocked by a lorry delivering a not very large garden shed by crane.
Get a train to Manchester from Disley and have a very nice boozy lunch somewhere
Try Habas or Canto
We gave up on birthday presents (and Christmas) years ago. If we want something we buy it.
Forge session. Make a thing out of hot metal.
I think we may have a winner…
Where are you based? I know a few decent options in wiltshire.
Winter cycling boots contribution. Best invention after the bike wheel
Kite or porcelain poppy.
Ahh gotta be a xiaomi portable car tyre inflator (and you should have change over for a blowy and a dab of molly.)
Decent hooker for 15 minutes
15 Hookers x 1 minute?
Ask her to take you out for the day.
Boring but maybe consider a donation to your local food bank? It'll give you a lovely warm feeling delivering £100 worth of food there and they will be overjoyed with it.
I’m new to these:
Exceeded my expectations 👌
I'm lined up for a forge session with a friend here in South Wales. Ystradgynlais to be exact. He's very, very good indeed. The Battle on the Beach trophies are some of his work.
A nice fully lined and interlined Roman blind. Keeping wind, chills and light out, keeping heat and cosy ambience in. :O)
Or a lunch out with friends at the 'Old Hall' Chinley.
Not a surprise coming from me, but a Leatherman.
You might think you don't want or need one, but the amount of times you'll use it when you have it on you will surprise you
Sheepskin onesie ?
I can't believe that Drac forgot to put the word 'Power' in front of Kite --> #standards 😉
Surely for a ton he could get a marmot skin onesie and a 4 pack of fosters..?
A pizza oven (given its a bit more than your budget) but I got one last year and it has been great - a fantastic way of entertaining and making food together.
johndough
A pizza oven (given its a bit more than your budget) but I got one last year and it has been great – a fantastic way of entertaining and making food together.
Name checks out
I did my 10th Plasma donation the other day and because they're desperate for donations they've started rewarding us. I got a big bar of chocolate, a pair of blood drop socks, a certificate, and a little blood drop badge.
It was quite embarrassing as I pointed out that was more than I get from Mrs R for birthday and christmas combined!
Have a look at Kiva. It (ie You) provides micro loans to people all over the world. When the money gets paid back, you get to 'reinvest' it again with another person/business.