Thought I would get this of my chest, asked a work colleague out on a date and she turned me down. Known her for ten years thought iwas in with a shout but turn s out she seeing someone ,if I had known wouldn't have bothered but she kept quiet about it. Not looking forward to tomorrow.
I'm sure she'll feel flattered. Nothing to be concerned about.
Move along, get it out your mind and be surprised when you get the second chance offer (or is that ebay?)
Laugh it off, move on. Good on you for having a crack at it. Shy bairns get nowt.
you need closure; shit on her desk
(course, she may not be seeing someone but just doesn't want to hurt yr feelings. In such cases, desk as above and then wee in her shoes)
Better her saying "no" now than you shagging her and then her saying "err, no thanks" after. Trust me 8)
Shy bairns get nowt
Good point; well made.
Unless you crashed & burned in front of your whole department, where's the problem tomorrow?
Faint heart and all that...
I hope you at least said "oh well, your loss." 🙂
It's not the beeing turned down,feel like she led me on, but hayho.
she may have made that up to by herself sometime to consider your proposal?
i'm seeing someone, but i didn't tell anyone,....hmmm,...maybe she's seeing someone who is married?...the plot thickens, and blackmail could be your way in?
True, but she had her chance.
... so if she turns around next week and agrees to a date, you'll say that? 😕
Probably not,but would like to think I could.
Put it down to experience & move on.
Look outside work for love.
if it's meant to be, it's meant to be....if i was as keen as you seem on her, i'd keep plugging away, almost as though you never asked her and just see what happens.
take it easy, chill out and don't stress over women.
Fair play for having the balls to do it. Nothing ventured - nothing gained!
I'm sure she'll feel flattered. Nothing to be concerned about.
And this^^
I sense irony in the OPs name.....apparently you're not according to your work colleague 😆
Just go into work tomorrow being yourself.
Unless you made a right dick of yourself, then what's the problem? Carrying on as normal and being friendly will go much further than being uptight about it.
I'm a bloke, blokes make up stuff in their heads as far as wimmins feelings are concerned. It's always been the same and always will be. Sometimes the instinct is right, sometimes it's so far off whack that you end up questioning your mental state.
Don't put it down to being 'led on', move on and maybe just have a good colleague friend relationship that will hold more value in the long run than a colleague shag partner relationship. Women friends are great and make a good release from bloke friends - make as many as you can and your life will be better for it!
Least said, soonest mended
Bad luck, but good on you for asking anyway.
Though you must now pretend that she does not exist, other than at the christmas party where you will get drunk and go from playing it cool and trying to woo her with your amazing dancing, being a complete bastard and saying how glad you are you didn't waste your time on her whilst trying to get off with the other girls from work in front of her, to finally blubbing whilst begging her to give you just one chance.
That's when you'll not be looking forward to going in to work the next day.
Thank for all your words of wisdom! Goin in head held high.
I appreciate that you have had a knockback, I am sorry for that. Who and why we are attracted to others quite odd, so do not feel that you are deficient in any way.
But I would ask you to take caution from TheArtistFormerlyKnownAsSTR, his advice here is good:
I'm a bloke, blokes make up stuff in their heads as far as wimmins feelings are concerned. It's always been the same and always will be. Sometimes the instinct is right, sometimes it's so far off whack that you end up questioning your mental state.Don't put it down to being 'led on', move on
Otherwise it sounds a teeny bit sexist, and a bit worse in the eyes of some. I know it made me cringe when I read it.
Stick to head held high and give her respect, she has a perfect right to knock you back.
As said look outside of work, don't dip your pen in the company ink.
Get down on your knees and give thanks that you've been saved from the worst fate ever... an affair with a colleague is dangerous and can potentially lead to one or both of you losing your job.
Didn't anybody ever tell you never to pee on your own doorstep?
Nah, give her a cheeky smile every time you see her, let her see you aren't agonising over it and if it's meant to be it will.
[i]Didn't anybody ever tell you never to pee on your own doorstep? [/i]
Shoes, it's "don't pee in your own shoes"
Thank for all your words of wisdom! Goin in head held high.
and so you should. you took a fancy to someone, was brave enough to ask her out but it didnt work. so what. just be friendly to her, the odd little good-natured jibe every now and then possibly about 'well you had your chance' etc so she knows its no big deal to you, youve moved on and not interested in pursuing her anymore (even tho you may be). certainly no puppydog eyes or telling her 'if it doesnt work out with matey im still here....'. youre not, her chance has gone 😀
Agree with the other comments really, but only from the don't take it too hard on yourself, she'll probably respect you for having the balls to do it..
I ended up marrying my office romance 😉
You've laid the seed. Just make sure you're there for the break-up... 😉
I'm surprised no one has offered this usual STW response yet, if I were you and I wanted to get total closure on such a traumatic emotional experience I'd [i]wee in her shoes[/i], preferebly when she's not standing or wearing them as you may well be escorted from the building.
I'm surprised you haven't read the thread! No-one has advised him to own her with bombers though.
Better to have loved and lost than never to have lost at all... well done for having the nerve.
issyfit - Member
It's not the beeing turned down,feel like she led me on, but hayho.
Just asking, but what made you feel you're being lead on? I've got this Goddess all over me like a bad rash at the moment, I'm sure she's leading me on, she rides exactly the same trail I do almost every other morning, I mean she knows I'm there, that's why she keeps coming down it isn't it? 😉
PS you're braver than me, I can't bring myself to do anything other than get out of her magnificent way...
Yeah whatever. At least you asked. Just don't wait 10 years next time! Never mind 'she had her chance'. A decade? Sounds like you had yours.
Monday morning, take her to one side and say
"I hope me asking you out last week doesn't make things awkward between us, I really enjoy working with you and thought it might be fun to spend some time with you outside of work, here's a sherbet lolly to show there's no hard feelings".
Thus proving that you are a bigger man, making you infinitely more sexy and everyone love sherbet lollys.
We're getting mixed metaphors here. Strictly speaking, one s***s on one's doorstep or in Salford, I seem to remember, one pees on one's chips.
Read the thread before rushing in with a seemingly witty comment?, gawd no.....that's not the STW way.
Hmm, the most obvious solution seems to be - kill your rival - get the girl
Own him with bombers
We've both been married before so wasn't in a position to do anything. Tbh didn't really fancy her then but funny how things change. On the bright side not as bad this morning as I thought it would be.
Good good. Just wait till you meet someone else. She'll be all over you.
If you've both been married before then take heart, there is a 70% chance you would get divorced if she said yes and you ended up taking her up the aisle.
Unlike the guy in the other thread who hasn't heard back from his job interview - you are now on the reserve list.
[i]you ended up taking her up the aisle. [/i]
I thought that sort of euphemism was frowned upon round here?
Never dip your pen in the office inkwell*
*Is what a female colleague told me when I asked her out
feel like she led me on
Stalker Alert!