MegaSack DRAW - This year's winner is user - rgwb
We will be in touch
Quite a day.
A relative drove into a parked car last night and ended up being breathalised. Over the limit and in court next month as a result.
Lengthy and deep chat today reveals that he has been on ssri's for a long time - following break up of marriage some years back and for the last year or so had an alcohol issue.
TBH no real surprise as he is quite reclusive and tends to shy away from family events, etc but has a full time job which is quite demanding.
Apparently he has refused counseling in the past and got rather aggressive when discussing the concept that he needs to talk to someone or an organisation who may help.
So....what can we do to help him?
Thanks all.
Tell him that he’s loved and that you all want to see him live a long and healthy life, making memories with the ones he loves. Offer to go with him.
If he gets angry/violent again I’d leave it. You can’t help someone that doesn’t want to be helped.
Try not to dwell on the problem. The only way he'll break out of this is by being able to visualize a future worth living for. I would also take a hard line and don't make allowances for his bad behaviour. You don't have to, and shouldn't do it in an aggressive way; just make it clear that certain behaviours are unacceptable. If you do otherwise then you reinforce his bad habits which makes them seem acceptable or tolerated. If that is allowed to continue then it will lead to a negative cycle. The visualising of a more positive future is more difficult because that is something he owns. All you can do is to provide opportunities and encouragement. Despite all this there may be nothing you can do so look after yourself.
His AD meds might be a little more effective if he drank less, but I suspect he knows etoh is a depressant.
Get him a bike and invite him out? Exercise and socialising is way more effective than meds alone.
Tell him that he’s loved and that you all want to see him live a long and healthy life, making memories with the ones he loves.
Great advice.
^ Sorry, but that is probably not the best thing to say to someone who is reclusive and avoids family/social events.
Enjoying spending time with other people might be the biggest problem he needs help with.
Sadly you can't help an alcoholic that doesn't want to help themselves - so trying to persuade them that they want to change is all you can try.