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Boris Johnson!

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But it wood av bin wers under corbeen.# PAYTREERTs 4 britern

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Posted : 02/09/2020 4:45 pm
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I really, really hope the fraud that is Joris is getting it from all sides.

Like every bullshit merchant who rocks into a new job claiming they are the best thing since sliced bread then epically fail, and then **** off leaving everyone else to sort their mess out.

I've had enough encounters with people like him in my lowly little working life to know how they operate. To get away with it at the level of Prime Minister (in the short term) means I have zero sympathy if every meeting he goes to someone takes him to pieces.


 
Posted : 02/09/2020 6:20 pm
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Prepare to be shocked.

When Joris replied to Starmers question at PMQ’s about refusing to meet the families of Covid victims, he said that he couldn’t as they were taking legal proceedings against the government

Turns out this is just another thing he made up on the hoof to cover his sorry arse. A complete lie.

There is no litigation. He won’t meet them simply because he’s a shithouse who doesn’t do accountability

John Crace summed up his ‘performance’ at PMQs today

Boris left flailing as his limitations become clear for all to see


 
Posted : 02/09/2020 6:59 pm
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Not having a cheering crowd behind him is absolutely killing Boris.

He's a stand up comedian in many ways and without the adoring crowd he just seems cringe worthy and flat.

Good stuff.👍


 
Posted : 02/09/2020 7:16 pm
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He’s a stand up comedian

He's starting to look a bit like Archie Rice.

Even to those who were happy to hitch themselves to the Bullshit Bus for their own electoral prospects.


 
Posted : 02/09/2020 7:28 pm
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Not having a cheering crowd behind him is absolutely killing Boris.

this exactly, somehow he’s managed to get himself the top job by appearing like an “Everyman” but now it’s apparent for all to witness, he’s a second rate after dinner speaker repeating the same jokes and quips to a crowd that is tired of the “Boris experiment”.

As for “absolutely killing Boris”, ‘tis a damn shame COVID didn’t finish him off, if I saw him crossing the road I dunno if if I’d bother braking


 
Posted : 02/09/2020 7:31 pm
 ctk
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There's no litigation!? Jesus wept.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 12:59 am
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Apparently the group have sent a letter before action so...no litigation.
No response received yet.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 1:16 am
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There’s no litigation... yet.

They asked Boris to meet them to discuss things. According to the Guardian he said he was only prepared to do so if they made a commitment to there being no subsequent legal proceedings.

That in itself tells you everything you need to know about Boris’s confidence in the way he’s handled things.

Now he seems to have absolutely guaranteed litigation, but the payouts when they win will just be taxpayers money and he’ll just scapegoat civil servants, so who cares?

It really is incredible that such a truly abhorrent shit like him has made it to be PM.

He couldn’t give a flying **** about anyone but himself. You could see today at PMQ’s how outraged he was at the idea that he should be held accountable for anything


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 1:38 am
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Yesterday's PMQs totally exposed him again. The Guardian take down is excellent.

On a side note, while I have huge sympathy for victims families, I'm not sure what litigation will solve. Any compensation will come out of already pressured public funds. Presumably any legal action in the courts could be a pretext to delay an enquiry. Scientific advisors/experts may be loathe to do the job if they risk getting dragged into litigation like this, so then who will be advising the incompetents?

The lawyers will get richer, but not sure - beyond an understandable desire to expose the dangerous incompetence of the government, which is already pretty obvious - what it will achieve


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 9:06 am
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On a side note, while I have huge sympathy for victims families, I’m not sure what litigation will solve.

At some point there will be a public enquiry regarding the govt's handling of the virus response, and part of that will undoubtedly be the transfer of elderly patients from NHS beds into care homes, some people will be have been killed by that decision. The families of some those people will seek compensation, and some of that litigation will fall on insurance companies and medical indemnity providers. There will be litigation, and at some point, as grisly as it sounds, a tariff will have to be established to set those compensation rates. There has to be action in order for that to happen.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 9:19 am
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At some point there will be a public enquiry regarding the govt’s handling of the virus response

Probably with Joris giving evidence via video link from abroad where he is then domiciled. Having kicked the can down the road as far as possible.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 10:30 am
 grum
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I don't know if public enquiries will still be a thing when this lot are done.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 10:34 am
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Sorry, I wasn't clear - I understand what the aim of the litigation is for the individual families, but I can only see it causing a delay to an enquiry, more back covering and less chance for lessons to be learnt, and gives a smokescreen for the government to continue to hide behind when being pushed for answers and clear direction going forwards. Not sure how it will help the wider "us" in the meantime.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 10:51 am
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When Matt Hancock (well.... DominicCummings through the medium of Matt Hancock) effectively abolished Public Health England, he was sending out a clear message.

That message was “we’ve conducted our own enquiry and have concluded that we are completely blameless and all those deaths in care homes were entirely the fault of PHE so we’re winding them up”

It’s a flagrant attempt to pre-empt and put off a public enquiry. The families of the bereaved can see it for what it is and their litigation is to demand a public enquiry so that they don’t get away with this. It’s not about compensation, it’s about accountability.

This lot are going to do everything in their power to ensure there is no public enquiry.

This will be like Hillsborough. They’ll still be trying to hold them to account for this in 25 years time.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 11:04 am
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This will be like Hillsborough. They’ll still be trying to hold them to account for this in 25 years time.

The grass around any published findings will be very long indeed.

If Cumstains has anything to do with it, the grass will have become secondary forest by then. That is if some Tory donor spiv developers haven't built on it first.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 11:35 am
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Very inconsequential tangent here: can we drop the 'Cumstains' nickname? It's no better than 'Wee Nippy' which I thought had been agreed was just puerile and undermining the valid points otherwise being made.

No offence intended to those using the nickname, you're still contributing far more to the discussion than I am!


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 12:00 pm
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can we drop the ‘Cumstains’ nickname?

I'll think about it. The thing is I really struggle not to do this sort of thing when it comes to this useless shower:

Joris Bohnson
Dominic Cumstains
Little Matty Handjob
Little Liam Fox
Chris Fayling
Priti Vacant
Dominic Raaaaaaaaaaab
Poison Penfold (aka Mark 'Monster' Francois)
Private Pike (aka Gavin 'ooh Betty' Williamson)

They're just beyond belief. They are only where they are because of their professed belief in an utterly stupid 'project'. So we end up with risible characters like this whose chief 'quality' is their opportunism/stupidity.

But yes, I'll try better....


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 12:49 pm
 grum
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+1 13thfloormonk


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 12:52 pm
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Joris Bohnson
Dominic Cumstains
Little Matty Handjob
Little Liam Fox
Chris Fayling
Priti Vacant
Dominic Raaaaaaaaaaab
Poison Penfold (aka Mark ‘Monster’ Francois)
Private Pike (aka Gavin ‘ooh Betty’ Williamson)

It's a good list! I'll be honest actually, maybe it's just the dirty ones I can't be bothered with, the others are funny, but Cumstains and Handjob just seems a bit playground.

(sorry, sorry, not trying to critique someone else's humour, maybe there just needs to be a bar set or I need to look away for the rude bits 😀 )


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 1:09 pm
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I prefer Short Cummings.  But Little Matty Handjob has to stay!


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 1:12 pm
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I don't really have a problem with a pejorative nickname as long as it actually reflects on the actions of the individual

So Failing Grayling is completely appropriate.

Dominic Cumstains and Joris Bohnson miss the mark

How about:

"Eye Test" Cummings and Boris Piccaninny Watermelon Letterbox Cake Bumboys Vampires Haircut Wall-Spaffer ****-Business ****-the-Families Get-Off-My-****ing-Laptop Girly-Swot Big-Girl’s-Blouse Chicken-frit Technology-Lessons Surrender-Bullshit French-Turds Dog-Whistle Get-Stuffed Get-Brexit-Done Bung-a-Bob-for-Big-Ben’s-Bongs I-Shook-Hands-With-Everyone Herd-Immunity Squash-the-Sombrero Johnson


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 1:13 pm
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Just call them by their surnames

Cumstains makes me wince


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 1:18 pm
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I'd vote for "short" Cummings, it seems to fit.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 1:19 pm
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And yet we criticize Trump for his derogatory nicknames. Pot, kettle etc.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 1:34 pm
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I agree completely with richmtb,nobody nailed a true description of Johnson better than Stewart Lee.
🙂


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 1:48 pm
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That John Crace takedown is a must read if you hate Johnson as much as most of us seem to do. It's devastating as it's just stating the obvious and isn't a wry look as you'd expect from a sketch writer but barely disguised contempt. I think he said recently it's a struggle to take a skewed satirical slant on parliament like some of his predecessors when this govt is now beyond satire.

Anyway, f you Johnson you fat *


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 1:48 pm
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I’ll think about it.

It may become easier for you when you reach 14 years old.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 2:00 pm
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kerley
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I’ll think about it.

It may become easier for you when you reach 14 years old.

Wasn't there a thread recently about getting old and being intolerant? 😉


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 2:09 pm
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It may become easier for you when you reach 14 years old.

Two more years?

I'll just carry on then. Just as soon as I've finished drawing that cock on the blackboard.

😘


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 2:19 pm
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Abbott got the job because they're sick of experts. He's going to be a bag of laughs.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 3:23 pm
 AD
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I see Rees-Mogg is keen on getting numbers up in the Commons.
Normally I'd actually think this is the right thing do but I suspect Moggster is more keen to get a baying mob behind Boris to chortle and yell as appropriate rather than any commitment to democracy.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 5:22 pm
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Have you seen what the haunted Victorian pencil has just done?

https://twitter.com/bbcpolitics/status/1301505990660153344?s=21

I’m presuming he played it on a wax cylinder on his gramophone


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 5:49 pm
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^^^^

Patriotism is the last refuge of the scoundrel.

Rees-Mogg is a much of an actor as Johnson is.

But such pathetic panto acts are seized on by gullible twerps as 'character' and 'a bit of British'. Zero substance when the crunch comes, though.

Even poor Rishi will have feet of clay when the BoE say 'no more sweeties for you'.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 6:00 pm
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It seems it’s perfectly fine to undermine the UK economy for personal profit as long as you wave your little Union Jack as you do so and talk like Mr Chumley Warner

If you’re a disaster capitalist then English Nationalism really is the gift that never stops giving


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 6:06 pm
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I'll second using correct surnames - de Pfeffel Johnson

shame it's not used a bit more widely to damage the 'I'm ordinary guv, honest' act........


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 6:47 pm
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Boris is still Teflon at the moment, whatever his name is.

On 1st January though all bets are off as the whole country wakes with an epic hangover that will last for years.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 6:50 pm
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On 1st January though all bets are off as the whole country has an begins an epic hangover that will last years.

I'm planning to run naked across the lawns of chequers whilst waving a huge European Union flag, come the 1st Jan. Bollox to Boris & his Brexit.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 6:58 pm
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I do like Hat Mancock as a nickname.

Him and Raaaaaaab remind me of so many people I worked with in the past who had smoke blown up them by gibbering managers and then single hand-idly failed to deliver a single thing of worth and everything they did deliver were just words written for them by the gibberer's.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 7:02 pm
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All they've got left is the culture war lever, nothing else. It seems to underpin all their arguments now because reasoning and facts have left the building.

Hence fat man pushing the IRA and remainer buttons at pmqs, even though they had absolutely nothing to do with any issues

That's why that land of hope and glory nonsense was manna from heaven. It was a complete non issue but the media went crazy for it and the usual **** seized on it, funny that


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 7:08 pm
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tjagain

Cumstains makes me wince

I solved this by avoiding dark coloured sheets....

Or is that the name of a Steel Panther album? If not, it should be.

Sorry - immature and puerile but I couldn't help it.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 7:24 pm
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binners
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It seems it’s perfectly fine to undermine the UK economy for personal profit as long as you wave your little Union Jack as you do so and talk like Mr Chumley Warner

If you’re a disaster capitalist then English Nationalism really is the gift that never stops giving

Sadly so true, there are a few deluded fools at work who honestly think we still have an empire and spout guff about "once we are free from Europe the world is ours!"
I just shake my head and slowly walk away.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 7:43 pm
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Yep... a big chunk of the UK population have had images of spitfires and talk of the blitz spirit used to sell them a sepia tinted dream of empire.

In reality Boris and his fellow snake oil salesmen, responsible for this, are doing the polar opposite of restoring ‘Britain’s glorious colonial past’.

They’re going to cause more damage to the British economy than any foreign power could ever dream of inflicting. We’re placing economic sanctions on our own economy. Declaring a trade war on ourselves.

Utter madness! And they’re doing this to make a quick financial killing for them and their mates, then they’ll be off, leaving carnage in their wake.

They’re correctly assumed that if you wrap it up in red, white and blue while singing Rule Brittania, you can literally get away with anything

It’s tragic


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 8:30 pm
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'Blitz Spirit'.

The big difference being that there actually was a proper threat in those days, which wasn't self-inflicted.

I imagine the rest of the world look at us with a mixture of amusement and pity.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 8:48 pm
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People were utter arseholes to one another during the blitz. No change really.


 
Posted : 03/09/2020 9:13 pm
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