Bad wife.
 

Bad wife.

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She ate the last of my roquefort while I was out chopping kindling.

Bad wife.


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 5:21 pm
 beej
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I think you'll find it was her roquefort all along.


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 5:25 pm
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"chopping kindling" there's your mistake, clearly not man enough, you should have been out felling trees with an axe that's been handed down 5 generations of your family, bare topped with braces on a hard frosty morning, having not had anything but coffee made via a smouldering fire


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 5:29 pm
theomen and tall_martin reacted
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Definitely your fault for leaving it lying about in the fridge.


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 5:29 pm
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"chopping kindling" there's your mistake, clearly not man enough,

Yes the real man simply commands it to split with the force of his will. And an axe. Although the cleaver I found in a house we moved into once, also works. 

Plus the logs you make it from should already be the correct length 😉 

Sorry for your loss of cheese. It usually is the other way around in our house though, I devour everything and the OH is disappointed when she expects it to still be almost a week later.


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 5:33 pm
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I think you’ll find it was your fault, along with everything else 🤣


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 5:34 pm
theomen reacted
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It could have been worse, she could have thrown it out because it was "mouldy".

In the early days of our relationship Mrs_H did that to some stilton I had left in the fridge😂


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 5:38 pm
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That's a risky move on her part, stealing your cheese while you're armed with an axe. The judge would clearly show leniency on you for "diminished responsibility" .


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 5:44 pm
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Just eat some of her tofu instead and think of the health benefit.


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 5:49 pm
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She did pour a 'glass' of wine down the sink (in a plastic cup) that was destined for the sauce last night. We've put that behind us.

But yeah unguarded roquefort is in continual peril in this house.

She's now moaning that the fire is "smoking".


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 5:54 pm
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Posted by: thestabiliser

She's now moaning that the fire is "smoking".

You chopped the kindling wrong.

Obviously.

😉


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 5:58 pm
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Not as bad as draining all the brine out of a jumbo jar of olives, only to use a few for a small salad.

I'm still awaiting trial, the courts are backlogged at the mo.


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 6:09 pm
theomen reacted
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I think there's a biblical passage that covers this?  "Should thine wife steal thine mouldy curdled ewes milk, thou shalt stone her with babybels until she doth repent" or something like that.


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 6:15 pm
epicyclo reacted
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Its just a bad day , not a bad wife. 


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 6:25 pm
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Peak STW tbf.


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 7:44 pm
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not a bad wife.

I dunno. She could've been gouda. I'm surprised th OP didn't go emmental....

 

 

 


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 8:33 pm
CountZero reacted
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Posted by: johnx2

I'm surprised th OP didn't go emmental....

To be brie-f, edam-ed if he does, edam-ed if he doesn't.  But I'd understand it if he just camembert it any longer.


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 8:43 pm
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She stole your Rocquefort? Cheezus wept, how dare she!?


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 8:45 pm
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Posted by: thestabiliser

She did pour a 'glass' of wine down the sink (in a plastic cup) that was destined for the sauce last night. We've put that behind us.

There's a pattern emerging

 


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 9:06 pm
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Posted by: blokeuptheroad

To be brie-f, edam-ed if he does, edam-ed if he doesn't.  But I'd understand it if he just camembert it any longer.

Why does every thread have descend into a flurry of puns? One or two might be funny, but it just goes whey too far


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 9:46 pm
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Posted by: andrewh

Posted by: blokeuptheroad

To be brie-f, edam-ed if he does, edam-ed if he doesn't.  But I'd understand it if he just camembert it any longer.

Why does every thread have descend into a flurry of puns? One or two might be funny, but it just goes whey too far

 

Yes, if people curd please just stop it with the puns, it would be appreciated. 🤔 

 


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 10:24 pm
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Posted by: MoreCashThanDash

Posted by: thestabiliser

She did pour a 'glass' of wine down the sink (in a plastic cup) that was destined for the sauce last night. We've put that behind us.

There's a pattern emerging

 

 

First the cheese, and now the wine? Next it will be the Seranno ham and the crusty bread that 'accidentally' dissapears.

 

hypothisis: She's assembling a clandestine charcuterie feast in secret, and you're not invited.

If there's any pate in the fridge, be sure to put an apple air tag on it, not an actual slice of apple, 'cause that will dissapear too.

 


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 10:35 pm
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A learning/therapy opportunity............

 

image.png


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 10:39 pm
tall_martin reacted
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hypothisis: She's assembling a clandestine charcuterie feast

She could be in it for the Mornay? 

.


 
Posted : 14/12/2025 10:56 pm
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I was thinking you are feeling brave this Christmas


 
Posted : 15/12/2025 8:47 am