[Closed] Anyone else get envious of certain mates?

And when he commits to something he sees it through

except riding his £2k bike 🙂

[i]Anyone else have "friend envy"?[/i]

Nah. swings & roundabouts innit.

I envy your friend, but none of mine really.

Admittedly that's an anomaly for him as he didn't have a plan when he bought it. It was just something he did on a whim (because he could afford to blow the cash).

Normally he'll say something like "I'm going to run X marathon next June" then he'll go away, train and end up doing said marathon.

(which he only has to do a couple of hours a week) and earns six figures

Wow, I wonder what trade he could be in? 😉

He's also a thoroughly decent bloke. Always helping other people. And when he commits to something he sees it through. No dicking about.

Sounds like a good buddy.

Anyone else have "friend envy"?

Nope, I'm better than all of them, and regularly enjoy telling them. 😉

I don't envy anyone who counts me as one of their friends. I have to suffer many things, but at least that isn't one of them. Thank christ!

I can find nothing to like about your mate at all. 😉

All I envy (and this isn't restricted to my friends) is people with perfect eyesight and a full head of hair. The bastards. The amount these two restrictions have held me back is incredible. I'd be a god by now if I had a thick thatch on my head.

Have you got either of those things?

Certainly not jealous of those who are financially and materially better off than me. Have a good looking wife who is still my best mate after 16 years, and two brilliant daughters.

What have I got to be jealous of, someone who drives a £50k car, earns 6 figures and has bragging rights among his peers.

Not a chance, by a county mile!!!

Most of my mates are married/settled with kids whereas I'm single with no ties.

Yeah there are (many) times I envy them.

Is this a roundabout way of asking if anyone knows someone who would be prepared to kill him? For a reasonable price?

Mate who took 2 years off to ride to New Zealand, and mate who lives in a couple hundred acres of West highland wooded Glen, I'd like to do both but would also get pissed off by some aspects of them.

All I envy (and this isn't restricted to my friends) is people with perfect eyesight and a full head of hair. The bastards. The amount these two restrictions have held me back is incredible. I'd be a god by now if I had a thick thatch on my head.

The bastard ticks both those boxes too 😯

hopefully some money-grabbing slut will snap him up and make his life a misery

Thanks to a multibuy offer I now have 3 types of Balhsen Choco Leibniz in the cupboard. As a result I envy no man, though a slightly faster metabolism would ne nice.

A good majority of my mates are degenerate wasters which makes it easier to deal with the few who I would say are genuinely successful.

This did make me think of one character in particular. He has led a fairly dull life, never been much of a drinker or socialiser growing up. He did well but not spectacular through school/collage/Uni (studied economics and business studies etc – all very dull). After Uni he went straight into the big IT firm he had done a year in business with during the course and is still there 12 years down the rd – sales role not a geek. He has a very nice house/car etc but his life is just so dry. Last time we met up we were talking about festivals and when I asked him if he had ever been he said no – he had never slept in a tent! Nice guy but very straight.

Thanks to a multibuy offer I now have 3 types of Balhsen Choco Leibniz in the cupboard

If I was in your position I'd be envious of anybody who'd bought three packs of plain instead.

chakaping - Member

Thanks to a multibuy offer I now have 3 types of Balhsen Choco Leibniz in the cupboard

If I was in your position I'd be envious of anybody who'd bought three packs of plain instead.

Care in the community just isn't working!

there are three types?
milk chocolate, dark chocolate and ?

Yeah, I do, the one that joined up after I did, and sailed through every course, the same one who is now a copper, ( a job I wanted but failed on BMI... ) got a lovely house,wife and kids, ( I can't have kids) and yet all the while has no concept of how lucky he is.

Me on the other hand?

I could fall in a bucket of tits, and still come out sucking a cock. 😡

(which he only has to do a couple of hours a week) and earns six figures

Wow, I wonder what trade he could be in?

Fireman or Teacher, hard to say which.

Has several properties, earns good money - and only works a few hours a week.

He's an MP.

hopefully some money-grabbing slut will snap him up and make his life a misery

Unfortunately he pulls fit birds too! He's pretty bright and I've yet to see him attract someone we have doubts about.

Has several properties, earns good money - and only works a few hours a week.

He's an MP.

Nah, he's straight 😀

Columbian Coke Barron?

Mate of mine rides bikes downhill at speeds I can only dream of, hits gap jumps like they weren't there and doesn't seem afraid of stacking it spectacularly. I envy him!

Nahhhh although I have to add in for a small period in my life I once stood and thought "why am I not.." It soon passed, I'm happy with every decision I've made and am not envious of anyone.

Nope, a few of my close friends are what you could term multi-millionares and i don't envy them in the slightest despite myself working for next to minimum wage and staying in a council house during the week - i'm involved with most of them on a weekly basis and i tend to spend my weekends staying wi one particular couple who own a big hoose in the Galloway countryside(as 1st noted below).

"X" started off as a panel beater but progressed to managing one of the upmarket blue-chip bodyshops in London by the time he was 23, by the time he was 27 he owned the company outright and a massive chunk of Brick Lane property, raced his own rally team to championship victory (BDA Mk2 Escort with no expense spared), partied very hard at the time with a typical 90's extravagant lifestyle, worked even harder...really friggin hard infact. His lovely GF of 30yrs (they're not married - nae kids but 5 dogs) worked the accounts at the business and they retired up here when he was 40, sold the business, all the properties in london and bought a 1000acre shooting estate and farm in one of the nicest Galloway areas, ran the estate and big-big house as an exclusive shooting lodge for a few years but they got a bit fed up of constantly having the sort of people they wouldn't normally socialise with staying in their house every week so that's all packed in now and it's run as a small farm for his prize Highland cattle with the majority of the acre-age let out to other farmers.

I'm up here at the moment for a week, which is why i've been posting a lot more than usual as they are away to disneyworld with his nephews kids, I took a week off work to look after the House, farm, dogs etc..etc.. My entire 1 bedroom bungalow back home roof included, would easily fit in the entrance hallway or the drawing room or the dining room and it's a nice place to roam about - amazing house for parties as there's so much space.

Other friends used to own (or rather their parents did) Orchardton Hall nearish to Dalbeattie but they sold it a while ago as it needed so much work done to it,

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Got other friends who are in similar financially secure positions dotted about this area and beyond - i don't envy them in the slightest as they are my friends......not something i feel the need to be envious about.

I've also got other circles of friends who have fought a life long battle with heroin addiction/alchohol addiction and suchlike who live in very-very different circumstances but they are treated with the same due respect as my so called "rich friends" and i see them regularly as well, I've lost 3 friends to heroin addiction/overdose (all fishermen), one of whom was found dead in Dumfries public toilets a few years ago with a needle in his groin, the previous year a winch on the boat ripped his arm off from the shoulder, the helicopter took 90 minutes to reach him out at sea but he lived, with his compensation money he delved deeper and deeper into addiction and i couldn't do anything to help him so it's not all champagne and pheasant shoots.

Do i Envy my friends?, nah, stupid question.... Do i Admire them?....Hell yes!.

Always someone better off. Always someone worse off. You have to look at the positives in your own life or you'll do your own head in!

I've got a mate who's pretty much the smartest bloke i know, in a calm, cool calculating kinda way, earns enough now to be considering 'tax efficient' ways of being paid etc.

I love him to bits and he's a great control subject to measure my ambition against if i had no compassion, morals, girlfriend or daughter.

From my perspective my 'sacrifices' have been absolutely worth it. I don't have to live in London either.

Comparing achievements though, he kicks my arse,

I envy their talent. But it's more admiration really not resentment.

I reckon my life is fairly "sorted" without being anywhere near as wealthy as your mate. The mates that I envy are the ones that are younger than me (that'll be all of them then) as you can't buy back youth.

I have no friends

Must be lucky

brakes - Member
there are three types?
milk chocolate, dark chocolate and ?

orange chocolate, dark chocolate. There may me others too.

OP, I'm guessing your mate is a professional footballer?

I only have one friend I envy and that's because her life is almost exactly the same as mine but she has a baby, so I have baby envy more than anything. I have married friends, single friends, rich friends, poor friends and carefree friends but I can take or leave being envious of what they have. Mostly I reckon I've got it better for me personally. So it's just that one friend I'm envious of.

I had a friend who played drums a few times for a crap pub band, who once had a temporary keyboard player who used to play in a Flock of Seagulls. For a bit.
I don't see him anymore. I wanted to hit him with a spade, I was so jealous.

Not me. Everyone I've envied in the past has finally display some kind of tendancy to disappoint others. I finally reached an acceptance that I'm happy with my life and being envious of other people is just a complete waste of time.

I have lots of friends I envy, mainly because they have children. I have lots of money but being a fat middle aged single gay man somewhat limits my horizons when it comes to having kids. I would give my right arm to have the chance to be a good father to someone. I guess I can be a great uncle instead, and you can hand them back at the end of the day right? 🙂

The only people I envy are those with good health and I really should quit feeling sorry for myself now and again.

randomjeremy - that's a sad post. 🙁 Have you looked into adoption?

I'm a teeny bit envious of my riding mate. He's slim, & fitter than me (but I'm faster down 'some' hills) he's got a proper nice house, no mortgage, 2 houses he rents out, no ties (ie, no brats, which is his/their choice) lovely wife, (but so have I) but mostly I'm envious of his climbing ability. He's like a mountain goat, albeit a 47 yr old one!
Git.

I have a little but of envy of the majority of my friends for one reason or another. Admiration more than anything. Bits of my life may be of envy too, probably nothing to admire though.

I would give my right arm to have the chance to be a good father to someone.

To answer no not really envious of anyone but i would take some folks riding abilities but they have generally worked harder than me to have them.

I used to, but as Dezb said, swings and roundabouts,

Fag hag and turkey baster

who says romance is dead?

I have one best mate who I rather envy, as he has just the most perfect job. He's a goldsmith in a small goldsmiths shop, which he got after being made redundant from the packing shed at Westinghouse. Lucky git. I had my perfect job, but lost it through bad business circumstances, and things have never been the same, sadly. 🙁

somafunk's is the one of the only posts i have any respect for on this thread.
why are you all chasing money so hard?
it is little bits of paper made in infinite quantities..... the time you get going round the sun it the only thing you have no control over..... live life.
enjoy every second.
you will regret every moment of envy on your deathbed.
i promise you.
what you have right now is incredible, and most of you will only realise when it is too late

I've got a couple of friends who have absolutely brilliant kids and I look at both of them in awe as they have done such an awesome job bringing them up. All the other stuff is just stuff.

oh yes definitely, although I like myself quite a lot, I get sort of envious of other peoples traits sometimes.. I'm mostly envious of other peoples apparent Confidence, it comes so easy to them, but for me is so hard. I sometimes wish I could have a confidence switch then everything I think I can be, would be. And if someone could take away my overpowering self-doubt, that't be good.

I have no envy of things though, no matter how expensive, they are just things, or jobs, it's quite an odd mindset I have I think. If my circumstances were different I'd probably think different maybe? (40, single, no kids, renting, shit wage job) I don't envy marriage or kids (yet)

In a way I think this thread is what this forum has come to be about, the polar opposite of why I came here in the first place- People riding bikes n stupid banter.
All this middle class angst is ****ing boring. Go away.

I could be jealous of certain friend's drive to get things done, other has mad skills on bike and one has fantastic job arrangement which allows him to spend a lot of time for travelling and outdoors stuff.
However, none of them are living my life and I'd like to think that my family and happy marriage might be source of jealousy for some.

I'd like to think that 99% of the time i'm the one people are envious of. Whilst i have a small house, a 2002 Mondeo, everything else in my life is truely exceptional. I walk 2 mins to horses stables, i can be riding trails in less than that.. i live in an area where crime is almost 0 and have the most amazing son on the planet, a beautiful wife and 3 x 1000cc motorbikes...

Nah not really, though I have done at times in the past, but it's not healthy really. I have mates that earn a lot more than me but they also work a lot more and don't really do anything creative, which I get a lot of pleasure from. Sometimes I wonder if I chose the right path but then I get paid to do something ridiculously fun and remember why.

I did have a mate who would boast about everything he had and everything he did as if envy were required of me, but I never felt the need to validate him.

For all those with envy about all the great things you see / experience about your mates, ask yourselves, do you really see what goes on behind closed doors / when your back is turned?

Very often every silver lining has a cloud.

Cheers jonah tonto, Well said 🙂 , there is one thing in life that is certain - if you desire or chase ££££ over quality, meaning and friendship throughout your life there will be only one outcome available to you and i can read that into quite a few posts on this forum, not necessarily on this thread i might add, If your ever up in the Galloway area give me a shout up (mail in profile) and i'll show you some of the wild riding we have, also got some excellent trail centres but i guess you know that.

On a wee side quip : Quite a few years ago i invited a few folk from this forum whom i'd never met in real life to come up to Galloway, stay with myself and i'd show them round a few of my riding spots. I didn't tell them i stayed in a 1 bedroom council bungalow (nice bungalow in a nice town in a nice area) but why should that make a difference?, my attic is all floored out and i have a couple of decent comfy double airbeds up there so i set it all up for them and they eventually arrived - welcomes and proper introductions were made etc - etc, off out to my mates pub for a drink and we talked bout stuff in general and had a cracking weekends riding out and about, i genuinely thought they were pretty decent and cool folk and as they left they thanked me for the riding, hospitality and the food i cooked for us all (i do like cooking!), and i found a nice surprise hidden in the cupboard after they'd gone - A bottle of malt whisky, i was touched.

A few months later i met up with other folk (decent folk) i know at one of the SSUK races (i use the term race in it's most loose form) and i mentioned the fact i had "such and such" staying a while ago for a riding weekend in the hills and they said (not verbatim but as best as i remember) "yeah....we know.....they've been slagging you off to f-cuk bout you living in a 1 bedroom council house at your age" they also mentioned something disgusting about one of my friends who is no longer alive (overdose) who used to come round to visit and get away from his situation for a few hours every week and i will not repeat what they said but if i ever meet them again when i return to the race scene next year i promise i will break their f-cuking jaws so they'll never be able to utter another word again....

Robert M Pirsig attempted to define quality in "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenence" and a few people on this forum might learn to be more satisfied with their standing in life if they took themselves away for a while to digest his musings, I regularly re-read "Zen" and whilst i find myself getting confused regarding some of his metaphors and in no way claim to fully understand the messages within, i do find the book has an extremely calming effect on my soul and thought process - right.....that's the hippy-dippy-trippy shit over with, promise! 😀

Kevevs :Nah!....The forum has always been like that - perhaps not to such an extent as it is currently but you have to understand the STW middle class demographic which i guess is rather well off but time poor and not really satisfied with what they've got..... chasing the promotion,the cars,the bigger house etc...etc... I may be entirely wrong though and if so i'll give you a few nice pictures to relax with that i took a few hours ago as i walked the dogs round the farm and checked on the beasts when the sun was coming up (see earlier thread if you missed it - I don't own a farm, just farm sitting), A stunning morning that went from torrential downpours to bright sunshine to torrential downpours in a matter of minutes - i got soaked to the skin and wrung my boxer shorts out when i got back but it was exhilarating and filled my chest wi that funny happy swelling feeling that i guess so many on here have lost somewhere along the road.

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Old "one horn" - she can be a bit cantankerous and will chase you down

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This is daisy, she's lovely and friendly - follows me like a dog

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The new Limousine bull, he's a big lad wi mahoosive knackers

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My fav tree in the house grounds, i talk to him every time i pass as he's over 400 yrs old so i guess he's pretty knowledgeable bout stuff, he doesn't say much but he's a good listener.

top post somafunk.. you summed it up nicely for me 😀

A few months later i met up with other folk (decent folk) i know at one of the SSUK races (i use the term race in it's most loose form) and i mentioned the fact i had "such and such" staying a while ago for a riding weekend in the hills and they said (not verbatim but as best as i remember) "yeah....we know.....they've been slagging you off to f-cuk bout you living in a 1 bedroom council house at your age" they also mentioned something disgusting about one of my friends who is no longer alive (overdose) who used to come round to visit and get away from his situation for a few hours every week and i will not repeat what they said but if i ever meet them again when i return to the race scene next year i promise i will break their f-cuking jaws so they'll never be able to utter another word again....

Thats awful. 🙁

Though also some people like to stir shit up and one person's light hearted piss taking comment is another persons vindictive bitchy comment.

PS can I come and stay in your scummy council bungalow and go biking some time? 🙂

A stunning display of mass assumptions and disrespectful tosh there Soma but interesting reading nonetheless. You have nice Cows.

grum - Member

A few months later i met up with other folk (decent folk) i know at one of the SSUK races (i use the term race in it's most loose form) and i mentioned the fact i had "such and such" staying a while ago for a riding weekend in the hills and they said (not verbatim but as best as i remember) "yeah....we know.....they've been slagging you off to f-cuk bout you living in a 1 bedroom council house at your age" they also mentioned something disgusting about one of my friends who is no longer alive (overdose) who used to come round to visit and get away from his situation for a few hours every week and i will not repeat what they said but if i ever meet them again when i return to the race scene next year i promise i will break their f-cuking jaws so they'll never be able to utter another word again....

Thats awful.

Its also based on hearsay. Why get wound up / make assumptions about it and then take action based on that? Maybe contact the chaps and have a polite discussion asking them what there comments were first.

Making assumptions about them based on someone elses interpretation (with respect) lowers you to thier world if indeed what was said is true.

My fav tree in the house grounds, i talk to him every time i pass as he's over 400 yrs old so i guess he's pretty knowledgeable bout stuff, he doesn't say much but he's a good listener.

🙂 I thought I was alone in that activity.

A warming post - good stuff.

Grum : Sure if you like, I've been off the bikes totally for 4yrs so wait a few months till i regain some semblance of bike fitness, drop me an email if your ever heading up this way next year, I have a lovely penthouse suite available upstairs, admittingly not much of a view, and for access you'll have to negotiate a ladder and pass through a hatch 😀

If you like i'll take you out interval training with old "one horn" above, perfect training partner as she'll punish you if you don't sprint fast enough.

Heres one of my fav coastal path routes, not much chance for error but arse-clenchinly good fun with good pub n' grub at the end. Cracking night ride route if you're confident on the trail as there is zero light pollution and the stars are almost touchable, or seem to be. It usually blows quite a strong s-westerly so if you do fall or stumble it should blow you up the cliff rather than the 200ft drop 😯

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NZCol : Apologies Col, it wasn't meant nor implied to be read as a sweeping generalisation of every stw'r (christ, i'm one after all) but from what i've experienced certain aspects do ring true in my eyes n' ears.

Nah....Definitely wasn't hearsay as such but hey-ho.....there's lots of good folk in this world, certainly enough to go round anyway.

Right..... i'm off, not posting anymore as i've monopolised this thread quite enough and bored everyone shiteless. Might actually go and ride my bike seeing as i'm back home.