[Closed] Android developers (or knowledge fountains!) - an idiot requires help please

I've got an HTC Desire (original) on Vodafone and Gingerbread isn't getting released for it (via Vodafone). I'd like to install it but can't find an idiot's guide simple enough to explain what I need to do.

I did a wee bit of digging - thinking I could find a copy of Gingerbread and work out how to install it but it doesn't seem possible to find an 'official' Gingerbread release that can be DIY'd onto the device (it was a small search so happy to be missing something on this!).

I'd like to know how to install a new version of Android to the phone - ideally one that either allows me to choose what services to run on start up i.e. not the Shares/News/Friendsstream stuff - I don't use it and reckon it uses resource and ultimate helps kill the battery in a day.

I like my interface that I've got i.e. desktop wallpaper and the apps on the screens and I'd like to keep as many of those as possible.

So where do I find an idiot's guide to doing this please? Also, where do I find a very clean version of Gingerbread for the device and also will it still allow me to get updates when new ones are available?

I've got about 12 apps from the market that I suspect will have updates for - Facebook/Gmail/OnTrack Diabetes recording/IMDB/Iplayer/MyTracks/Compass/Maps/Bubble Level/etc. Also, I'd like to know if it is possible to update Android and not lose my texts/contacts/usergroups - if I lose them, fair enough but thought I'd ask.

I've had a nosey round the XDA website and I'm completely lost, hence my post here in the hope someone can assist (or point me in the right direction).

Thanks.