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BINGO!! This one will run n run I fear. I suggest letting the guy speak for himself.
Yeah, pity this ain't a Monday Morning thread, or it could run for days.
Now, how long before Godwin's Law is invoked?
if i wanted to i could do what the **** i wanted!, but because i really care about my kids i would'nt dream of leaving them, i understand some people can'nt see there kids for what ever reason, i've been there, but with a lot of perseverence, i got through it all, theres no excuse!!!
are you for * real! you daft * shit!
Colourful.
I say again - do you know the man and his position? Because unless you do you do not have the info to judge him.
I have met sharki a couple of times but I know I don't know him well enough to cast judgement on him. So until I do I give him the benefit of the doubt and as he has been generous towards me in the past I will be generous towards him
Did anyone watch that tv program where some vicar did something similar to this? (the wandering thing, not calling TJ a "**** shit" obviously)
He was a cheating bastard who relied on his dog collar and camera crew to bounce the unsuspecting and camera-struck into giving him stuff when sans dog collar and tv crew they'd have told him to piss off
That program really irritated me - don't be like him.
I like this thread because it has Tj quoting himself quoting someone else already! and it's early days!
if your coming up past the midlands(leicester) and fancing laying a patio and path give me a shout and we can come to an arrangment 🙂
Yes, nobody is in my situation and i hope none of you ever try to take your own life.
If you have, then perhaps you can begin to know what it feels like.
So i managed to stop myself, 3 times in fact, to prevent a 4th and maybe final time. Instead i walked away from the situations that forced me to take drastic and near fatal actions.
Hey! i've sat here for 2 hrs typing a reply in this box, trying to word it in a way you can understand, to put my point across, however..
I know this place too well, to many critiques and experts on everything.
In short my feelings are thus.
For 38yrs i've felt like a caged animal, only being let out on occasions but under the curfew of society and governmental rules, having a routine, being part of the system, well it broke me, i didn't fit in.
When i walked away, i had all the control, no schedule, routine to keep to. I didn't have to be somewhere at a certain time, instead i had all the time i needed.
When i met someone, i didn't have to rush off, i could tell them stories, mend bikes, listen to their problems. Every meeting was a pleasure, every place appreciated.
I had no illness's, flu, no headaches, panic attacks.
Why not? Was it because i wasn't stressed and was so relaxed?
I had time to meet and spend time with amazing people and see amazing things, i walked over 700 miles and never got angry, rarely felt really stressed, needed to raise my voice or cry.
And all without means to depend on money, guaranteed shelter, luxurys.
If that's what it takes for me to be happy what right does anyone have to make me be unhappy?
Sharki, ignore the petty minded fools.
YOU know what's best for you at the moment. Good luck in your travels.
I'm not sure you're doing the right thing and I don't want to be encouraging you, but I've seen enough people living the wife and two kids, mortgage and mowing the lawn on Sunday morning life to know that I couldn't put up with it. I'd have walked out years ago.
I'm in the Wyre Forest in Worcestershire, somewhere on the border between a conventional and an alternative way of life.
If you happen to be passing this way, call in.
Sharky
If you are in the S of France this winter then pop over the border into Liguria, Italy.
I have spare apartment where you can stay in exchange for some trail building help...or driving the shuttle bus...guiding even...
Ciao e buon passegiata
Oh dear - all very judgemental. Room at Inners in exchange for a bit of decorating.
I'm with the MTFU crowd on this one; part of being a grown up is doing stuff that you don't want to do, like getting a job, like accepting responsibility, like looking after children.
[i]If that's what it takes for me to be happy what right does anyone have to make me be unhappy?[/i]
I suspect blaming other people for your unhappiness is not going to help.
Anyway, you have a great time, we'll still be here, doing the shit that you're not doing.
I do not know you Sharki, but do what you have to do mate!
I do agree with some of what you have said about being part the system, it stinks!
If you need some bike bits or anything else, and i have something you need you are welcome to it (email in my profile).
People have helped me out in the past, so i always help others when i can. 8)
HI Sharki - have a wicked time mate.
To be honest I'm of the belief that he's more use to his kids alive than dead, maybe one day the wanderlust will go but the choice between seeing his kids grow up and living on the road would never be an easy one to make and to me he's clearly had a long time to consider his options and his choices are his to bear.
I say again - do you know the man and his position? Because unless you do you do not have the info to judge him.
I have met sharki a couple of times but I know I don't know him well enough to cast judgement on him. So until I do I give him the benefit of the doubt
This little pearl of wisdom came from TandemJeremy the very same man who only a couple of weeks ago was rather active and very spiteful on the Elbry threads, a man, I suspect, Tandemjeremy has never met.
For what it's worth if Sharki wants go off on a big wander and his kids/family etc are all happy with it then as far as I'm concerned so be it, but can we not have anymore of the Howies style justifcations for it please?
richiethesilverfish
Its hardly the same situation. Sharki is not claiming things that are clearly untrue
[i]I say again - do you know the man and his position? Because unless you do you do not have the info to judge him.
I have met sharki a couple of times but I know I don't know him well enough to cast judgement on him. [/i]
and you also don't know him well enough to know what he's really thinking.
i know shane well enough. i'm not going to discuss my thoughts on here as he knows them.
No I don't aleigh - which is why no judgement.
then you need to get under the surface to understand why, not just encourage the situation
Don't save up to go travelling like the rest of the world would...
...and, without meaning to be cruel or judgemental, don't worry about paying anything towards the society that you exist in, the sanitation, the healthcare, the education, the legal system, the searchers who spent time looking for you..
It's fine, we'll take care of all that while you find yourself.
(I'm aware that this is coming across in a less than pleasant way, but it's meant as a kind of antidote to the 'Yeah man, you go and find yourself dude-ness above.)
To be honest I'm of the belief that he's more use to his kids alive than dead
Amen to that. Not everyone is wired up the same, you can't just tell someone to MTFU and take it all because there are so many unknowns to a persons psyche. Having read Sharki's posts its obvious he cares enough about his kids and life to choose a longer path back to happiness. So to all the people who think he's just copping out or whatever take a look at your own kids and think to yourself, if you just couldn't cope anymore and felt like ending it wouldn't you do everything in your power to remedy your situation by any means necessary?? Sure it seems harsh leaving your kids and opting for a nomadic lifestyle but in years to come his kids will be pleased he was man enough to accept a life that worked for him and didn't leave them fatherless.
Sharki - we've never met, but we have a vague connection - you used my 24/12 place last year when I couldn't make the event.
MrNutt sums up my view best. Plus the world would be a very dull place without people realising that the daily grind is not for them. There's plenty of room for a few people to live a little differently.
Doing your own thing, being happy and passing on this happiness to your friends and family through letters, emails, phone calls and occasional visits seems to me to be far better than carrying on in a situation that has taken you to some bad places.
Whatever you end up doing - good luck.
[i]Sure it seems harsh leaving your kids and opting for a nomadic lifestyle but in years to come his kids will be pleased he was man enough to accept a life that worked for him[/i] [b]and went walkabout while someone else paid for them and fed them and brought them up and wiped their noses and disciplined them and made their school dinners and washed their clothes and read them stories and bought them sweets and tucked them into bed and helped them to become people.[/b]
Fixed it...
[i]So to all the people who think he's just copping out or whatever take a look at your own kids and think to yourself, if you just couldn't cope anymore and felt like ending it wouldn't you do everything in your power to remedy your situation by any means necessary?? [/i]
yes, it's called getting professional help, something i know about
and went walkabout while someone else paid for them and fed them and brought them up and wiped their noses and disciplined them and made their school dinners and washed their clothes and read them stories and bought them sweets and tucked them into bed and helped them to become people.
Fair point, but what would you do in his shoes?? Carry on your life as is and end up killing yourself or blissfully anaesthetised at the bottom of a bottle, either way being of no use to your kids. Maybe leaving your kids is the same as that but you can come back when you're able and still be a part of their lives, better than nothing.
I know about professional help too and it worked for me, what i'm saying is everyone is different and surely we cant judge a man for finding his own happy medium however selfish it may seem to the rest of us.
Sharki - my Mum and Dad i am 100% sure will welcome you in the cottage in teh Peak. Dad is a carpenter and needs some help as do the laydeez of the village. Give me a shout when you get up here. Unfortunately our house is now a little full 🙂
Fair point, but what [s]would you[/s] did I do in his shoes??
Gritted my teeth, took my medicine, went back to work, acted like a grown up, paid my taxes, paid for my children.
Sorry, but running away and leaving the rest of the world to the job that you should be doing is wrong.
****less dads are ****less dads, whether on a council estate or a mountain bike forum.
If I were you sharki, I'd bite nasher's hand off, That's an offer of a lifetime right there ^^^^^^^.
Oh and ignore the negativity on here, I'm sure you will anyway.
[i]Fair point, but what would you did I do in his shoes??
Gritted my teeth, took my medicine, went back to work, acted like a grown up, paid my taxes, paid for my children[/i]
same for me
edit - it's not negativity
Well I'm glad that worked for you. I'd second what The Doog and trailmonkey said.
Sharki I'll pm you my contact details over there
[i]I'd second what The Doog and trailmonkey said.[/i]
if you don't have kids and haven't suffered with depression you would
I have met sharki a couple of times but I know I don't know him well enough to cast judgement on him. So until I do I give him the benefit of the doubt and as he has been generous towards me in the past I will be generous towards him
Bingo. Same here. Shane is a sound bloke and welcome at our house if he passes. I don't need to say any more.
🙂
@ crikey and aliegh, i know its not negativity cos i did the same as you two, all i'm saying is we're not all the same, sometimes the pills dont work.
[i]it's not negativity[/i]
+1
It's not negativity; the problem is that people look and think 'Wow, cool, yeah man, just travelling about' without looking closer and seeing that dumping everything and running away is just another symptom.
Mental illness is illness, just like appendicitis, or pneumonia, and ignoring it doesn't make it all better. Being told that your choice is great, or cool, or courageous is the least helpful advice in this situation, and ignoring existing responsibilities makes things worse for other people too.
Walking away from your problems is the kind of behaviour we/us/you would condemn in any other situation, so why is it ok now?
Tough choices, but then no one ever said life would be fair.
edit: [i]we're not all the same[/i], true, but we all have similar responsibilities, to ourselves and others, and I can't see that the proposed lifestyle will make things better.
Like the 'things my dad says' thread; one piece of advice I got was " Stop being a t**t, and start being a grown up". If that means working at a shitty job to provide for people, get it done, stop chasing rainbows, appreciate that happiness is a fleeting emotion, not a lifestyle choice.
aleigh i'm not going to comment on a public forum but all i can say is that i can empathise with sharki
I'm not saying his choice is great, i'm saying it works for him. And it's keeping him alive. I could never, ever leave my kid like that, i missed the second year of my kids life with my problems but thats a different story. Ultimately it does seem like running away but its keeping him from being another statistic and we should be thankful for that. Going to hit the hills now before i get too introspective!
What's wrong with being selfish? You only get the one life, too many people piss it away.
Perhaps after getting away from it all for a week / month / year, the OP will end up sorted enough to come back. Sounds like a sensible decision to me. If it works, great, if it doesn't, try something else. Keep trying.
Unless you've not been paying attention too closely, he's already moved on from the selfish option. That's a win right there.
[i][b]Perhaps[/b] after getting away from it all for a week / month / year[/i]
Perhaps...
..and the next year? and the year after?
How long would the charity of STWers be happy to keep going?
It's not a plan, it's not a solution, it's running away.
I'm out, because I [b]have[/b] to do stuff...
i agree, everyone's different. in my opinion it's for professionals to work out the best solution, not yourself when you're in a fragile state.
Enjoy finding yourself, if running away works for you then good. Am near the wyre forest if you needed to trade a bit of gardening for a bed or food.
One thing to seriously to consider and keeping the back of your mind. While you are off finding yourself, those you leave behind will move on with their lives, you may find it very difficult coming back to a place that should be familiar but actually you are more of a stranger than you were on your travels.
Right then, whose first on here:
[img] 
[/img]
Sharki or you lot?