MegaSack DRAW - This year's winner is user - rgwb
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Do you need to consciously play groups / individuals off against one another or can it just happen without you even realising it?
this is not the thread you're looking for.........................:)
I concur.
Neither of you are right.
No, but then again probably
Interesting point, and the answer is usually "yes you can manipulate without knowing it". I feel that the more intelligent you are, the more 'snide' about it you are.
The classic case is a young girl attending A+E after taking an overdose (not suicidal, just 'fed up'). Usually it's because her partner is threatening to leave, so this is manipulative behavior.
The smarter/more coping ones amongst us would aim to achieve the same outcome by more covert manipulation (spreading guilt, acting helpless etc).
As I was making this point to a nurse at work (in an attempt to explain that really these types of patient are in similar situations to us, just they manage them less well), another nurse cam up to me to tell me about a patient they'd seen and ended with "do you want to see them??". This was CLASSIC manipulation - not as supraliminal as "come and see this patient", but it really left me with little choice over my actions did it! DrP well and truly manipulated!
DrP
Yes. My mum is an absolute master of the embedded command, which I think comes from years of being a high-school teacher.
She would be mortified to realise how much she dictates to others what she expects the outcome of a conversation should be with her method of 'attack'. It's so difficult to emulate that i can't really give an example, but it was my wife who noticed just how good she was at it after she had been on an NLP course.
A crude example might be along the lines of: 'What would you like for dinner when you come to visit on Sunday?' And you're left thinking 'lamb or beef?' When the real question should be 'Are we visiting on Sunday?'. But she's so much better at it than this poor attempt.