[Closed] Bike p0rn - what's the sexiest damn bike you've ever seen on the interweb?

This thread almost could have been called "Bike Perversions. What's the ugliest damn bike you've ever seen on the interweb?"

With a couple of notable exceptions.

Yeti RDH in black (sorry no linky).

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Yeah, thats an expensive frame, obviously. But sexy? Vaguely good looking?
Nope. A hideous hotch potch and my rebuilt Principia looks better!

Obviously IMO.

Found the one I was on about.. I think it looks awesome!

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Some Gorgeous bikes on the thread!

My Fave commuter I saw online ages ago:

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And Old Git Surry posted this one ages ago:

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pics dont quite do it justice but this was pron in the flesh

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Maybe some distinction needs to be made:

Readers wives = on-one

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Just for vinnyeh.

My Jones hanging around after a good thrashing. 😉

They look so much betterer without one of those gear danglers hanging off the back. 😆

[url= http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4050/4493561695_57dc802e65_b.jp g" target="_blank">http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4050/4493561695_57dc802e65_b.jp g"/> [/img][/url]

Waits for a good flaming. 8)

Didmatt, that 951 is gorgeous!

[url= ]This - and variations thereof.[/url]

Road bike pron needs two things:
Butted steel frames.
Campag components.

I think this looks rather spanking. Drilled Campagnolo brake levers.

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Mountain bike pron needs to look stupid. Something like this is ideal.

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That 951 would win if it didnt have fugly wheels on it.

you can pick from either of my current very different bikes

[URL= http://inlinethumb50.webshots.com/44465/2933932850036898833S600x600Q85.jp g" target="_blank">http://inlinethumb50.webshots.com/44465/2933932850036898833S600x600Q85.jp g"/> [/IMG][/URL]

[URL= http://inlinethumb20.webshots.com/2003/2955441700036898833S600x600Q85.jp g" target="_blank">http://inlinethumb20.webshots.com/2003/2955441700036898833S600x600Q85.jp g"/> [/IMG][/URL]

Dear god!!!

sweet merciful joisus... that Preston is awesome in it's complete non-sexiness!

But who am I to talk, I find my Bow-ti strangely alluring 😆

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Bit like a too-skinny supermodel isn't it?

[i]Bit like a too-skinny supermodel isn't it? [/i]

That's been in a particularly nasty car crash?

yes.

edit: Actually, after looking at it for a little while, I've realised it makes my head hurt. It's like one of those impossible drawings with water continually flowing downhill.

The Bow-ti is a bit of old 90s porn.

That 951 looks like it can take a good hard thrashing. V nice.

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and

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psychle - Member
Didmatt, that 951 is gorgeous!

It is, then again im a sucker for most big travel bikes... just something about them!

I_Ache - Member
That 951 would win if it didnt have fugly wheels on it.

shredder's white Mojo with white forks.

http://www.singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/new-steed-2010-ibis-mojo-sl-wanting-build-advice-though

OK, on the MTB front I think schmiken wins so far with his pic of the old Klein.

I'm afraid that things like an On-One just don't count. For it to be bike porn it needs to be rare/exclusive/different (but also nice looking which cuts out all the Jones freak bikes). The On-One is a decent bike but it's simply a collection of mass-produced products bolted together.

Road bikes only count if they're simple and subtle - road bikes shouldn't need garish graphics and paint jobs or stupid bendy forks, they should just look fast.

[url= http://www.brianrourke.co.uk/rourke-953-mtb-frame-pi-1174.html ]this[/url]. end of.

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Congrats samuri, not a bad effort there.
sambob - that's one of the wrong-est answers ever posted on any STW thread...

sambob - that's one of the wrong-est answers ever posted on any STW thread...

I don't know... that's pretty good looking to me!?

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I think I'm going to be sick.

afraid that things like an On-One just don't count. For it to be bike porn it needs to be rare/exclusive/different (but also nice looking which cuts out all the Jones freak bikes). The On-One is a decent bike but it's simply a collection of mass-produced products bolted together.

whilst I am inclined to agree up to a point.. I think is very narrow minded.. and slightly bossy of you..

It also speaks volumes about the kind of porn that you like to watch..

Whilst I find readers wives a bit hard to stomach.. I personally prefer the girl next door look.. rather than the near perfect uber chicks that we seem to get thrust upon us.. hey... and anyone with a soul must secretly feel great about seeing a Jonesesque girl getting wild and freaky with a big happy grin on her face from time to time..

LOL!
I can see your point. Personally I wouldn't want to own any uber niche porn bikes on this thread (I don't watch porn either thanks...), I just think that to qualify as bike porn it needs to be different to the usual mass-market offerings, even if it's been lovingly custom built by the owner (as that On-One obviously had been) but I can admire the bike porn for what it is.

I'm never really bothered what someone actually rides, it's all people on bikes and that's (usually) a good thing. The whole point of bike porn is to say "ooh, that's new/different/niche/aesthetically pleasing" but then to go and ride your own bike. None of my bikes fit the description of bike porn - they're all custom builds and (to me) they're very nice but they're just bikes, no-one would look at them and go "phwoar" which is surely the whole point of bike porn?

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😀

phwoar... how'd I forget the Mojo HD... luverly!

Bleugh! Mojo is one of the ugliest contemporary bikes IMO. A real marmite bike if ever there was one.

this would do me....
not bad self
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anything by groovy or kish

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or of course dekerf

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Something like this for me.

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[img] [/img] This does it for me...

Jonesesque girl getting wild and freaky with a big happy grin on her face from time to time..

Would that be like 'readers wives'?

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Nobody's got anywhere close.
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or maybe
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though this is my personal favourite
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cyborg pr0stitute from the future

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Whoa (falls off chair)

@aracer - nice demonstration of not getting anywhere close there, cheers.

[url= ]this one[/url] in this colour.

please please please stop putting disgusting darkside demics on here. they are [u]NOT[/u] bike porn.

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Hmmm, could think of 100 others that this thread deserves, but this springs to mind first (sans stupid saddle and brake cable):

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[i]please stop putting disgusting darkside demics on here. they are NOT bike porn.[/i]

s'funny that cause [b][u]I think[/u][/b] the thing you posted is absolutely hideous. Nice colour but that's it. But everyone has different taste so maybe you need to think about that.

Although anyone thinking a road bike is bike porn and then posts a pic with the bike in the inner ring needs to be spoken too.

But everyone has different taste

apparently very few people have [i]any[/i] taste

your all blind!
yargH!

I can't stop looking at this:

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what about this

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One of these (road)

http://www.cervelo.com/en_us/bikes/2010/R3sl/

http://www.cervelo.com/en_us/bikes/2010/P4/

And I have one of these which I love;

http://content.mtbr.com/images/Tradeshow/13/298/prodimg1.jp g" target="_blank">http://content.mtbr.com/images/Tradeshow/13/298/prodimg1.jp g"/> &imgrefurl= http://content.mtbr.com/TRP_13_298_1crx.aspx&usg=__oIN6IZn9RzMPbxmK-Ofx_MFjzFQ=&h=750&w=1000&sz=322&hl=en&start=4&sig2=rinjLydMriXKxJVp9FfHYQ&itbs=1&tbnid=natQ3RChaRK1xM:&tbnh=112&tbnw=149&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dfoes%2Bfxr%26hl%3Den%26gbv%3D2%26tbs%3Disch:1&ei=-1_tS8-tHoLDsAa7xfSaBQ

but mine is red.

The closest for me on this thread are the old Klein, the Groovy (minuss the barends) and the Fat Chance.

for attention to detail and slick lines, this is a beaut:
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There are a lot of nice bikes in this thread (and some not so), but I have to say the first picture I saw of a Singular Peregrine:
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made me really want to try one, and I can't say that of many of these except that Jones.

This looks so good for DJ

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StuE that is horrible. Kill it please.

I quite like this....
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Most of you are very, very wrong.

Crank Brothers wheels- horrid.

Bendy aluminium- horrid.

Wierd handlebars- horrid.

Pinarellos- horrid.

29ers- especially horrid.

Components that aren't black or silver- horrid.

Joneses- repulsive.

Here's some really nice bikes-

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I'm especially proud of this as it's mine (it'd be proper porn if I had a photo of it now without those minging blue tyres)-

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All in though, Samuri wins. That's a beautiful bike.

Yes with the evil, but that vanilla is a bit dodgy. I do love de rosas though.

I can't find a pic of a Vanilla that does it justice. They're stunning frames but all the pictures on the website have them hanging with horrid bits.

This is awesome as well, proper big bmx (Sunday Model C)

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ahem.....

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i thank you

old skool p0rn 🙂

Wanted a picture of the new Mondraker Kaiser - but this was all I could find
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Not Really - here is the money shot

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Or if you prefer blondes

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Ventana El Ciclon in this custom blue [img] http://forums.mtbr.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=353574&stc=1&d=1208691762 [/img]

Jim the saint wins by miles!

I prefer carbon HT bikes myself. S Works is better specced but IMO this looks nicer:

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Blimey surf-mat.. if that's your idea of bike porn, this must be a right tun on!
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