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Luckily quarter of a mile from home. Decided to stand up to stomp the pedals and fly off a few curbs. Big crunch but instantly forgotten as my chain snapped and my knee smashed into my bar/stem.
Now elevated with an ice pack but it’s swollen massively. Looks like an extra knee growing out of my normal knee.
Not sure where it stands in the mtb pain hierarchy? Higher or lower than shins / pedal interface? What else am I missing?
Bollocks to the crossbar is pretty bad in the moment, although doesn't usually persist as long.
The worst shinner I had wasn't painful, another was, but not as bad as a golf ball sized lump on my knee, and the knee definitely kept me off the bike for longer.
Kidney stones...
Kidney stones...
After regularly dehydrating myself on mountain bike rides, I would agree with this.
Although rolling a testicle over the back of a saddle comes close 😳
Out for a ride to avoid going to the pub at lunchtime on black eye Friday a few Christmas’ ago… Front wheel washout on a fast descent of a local sandstone gully. Came to my senses still holding the bar and almost upright on my bike , semi ‘impaled’ on a snapped sapling. Cue broken ribs. Crawling gingerly in and out of bed and trying not to cough or laugh for the duration of the holidays. Bonus after a few days was riding ( easy stuff) from home because I couldn’t lift my bike into the van.
Bollocks to the crossbar is pretty bad in the moment, although doesn't usually persist as long.
more a 90s issue 😂
Kidney stones is correct, any woman who has given birth and had kidney stones will tell you that.
It's all too regular for me that. The family just look on helplessly knowing that there's not a lot they can do to help.inner thigh cramp the night after riding...
Luckily quarter of a mile from home. Decided to stand up to stomp the pedals and fly off a few curbs. Big crunch but instantly forgotten as my chain snapped and my knee smashed into my bar/stem.
Now elevated with an ice pack but it’s swollen massively. Looks like an extra knee growing out of my normal knee.
Not sure where it stands in the mtb pain hierarchy? Higher or lower than shins / pedal interface? What else am I missing?
I've had a few painful episodes but this was the worst (on bike anyway)
4 miles from car parked up a forestry road in the galloway hills, 30 miles from home, and 45 miles from Dumfries hospital.
Fell off in the most innocuous way possible descending Corserine (big hill) and landed on left elbow, suffered a compound fracture of elbow joint with bit of bone sticking out (got pic, won't post), strapped arm to chest using belt from endura humvees best i could and trying not to pass out made my way down and eventually back to car, lifted bike into back of my mk2 scirocco scratching hell out the paintwork (19lb ss thankfully).
Drove to hospital which was v-hard as I had to change gear with right arm/hand - kept car in 3rd gear and 40mph all the way till Dumfries then 2nd gear, drove to A&E door and apparently i passed out attempting to get out of car with blood dribbling from my elbow ......... had surgery following day and 7 days hospital B&B due to blood infection from wound which as I have a bicuspid heart valve they were quite worried about
Fine now but my elbow clicks/pops
Dislocating your knee... Painful enough to cause me to void my bowels as I did it! A strong 9.5/10 on the pain scale.
Taking your first shit after invasive surgery on your ringpiece... I would genuinely have taken my own life had I seen a way to do so whilst this was happening. Not ashamed to admit that I was in tears the whole time... A genuine 11/10...
Not had kidney stones yet, but am reliably informed they're pretty sharp too...
Waking up in the recovery room after my appendix and the cyst on it had been taken out.
Because despite repeatedly being told morphine has no effect on me, despite witnessing me being given morphine before the operation and me continuing to talk normally and quite insistently telling them it really wasn't working... Morphine is what they gave me.
I am not sure if its the most painful thing but it was the biggest acceleration from completly oblivious to "someone has cut through my abs"
I'm with the OP. I would rate a fractured knee cap as more painful than cracked rib, fracture wrist or broken arm. The other weirdly painful thing was being bitten on the eyeball by a midge
My displaced fractured collarbone in June will take some beating!
I would rate a fractured knee cap as more painful than cracked rib, fracture wrist or broken arm
I played a footy match once where our winger hurt his knee about 5 minutes in. At half time he said he needed to come off. Turned out he'd fractured his kneecap
four broken vertebra - slow speed over the bars - 1 year later for first ride, 2 years later for first 100 mile ride….4 years later for LEJOG…..
when the consultant told me after 5 days that I probably wouldn’t poo or wee again “but you’ll be ok, you can have a bag” , I didn’t imagine I’d ever be riding again….but thankfully he was wrong on all counts 👍
My displaced fractured collarbone in June will take some beating!
Stings too, I put mine back in place to walk towards the car while my mate set off at speed to pick the car up.
four broken vertebra - slow speed over the bars - 1 year later for first ride, 2 years later for first 100 mile ride….4 years later for LEJOG…..
when the consultant told me after 5 days that I probably wouldn’t poo or wee again “but you’ll be ok, you can have a bag” , I didn’t imagine I’d ever be riding again….but thankfully he was wrong on all counts 👍
I should add that the only lasting effect is that I’m an inch and a half shorter 😬
Ruptured Achilles tendon is quite a sting.
Spent a few months this year sorting one . I empathise .
I see all of your shattered bones and ruptures organs and raise you…
… the scratch on your calf of a frayed front mech cable
Kidney stones +2
One summer, at around age 10 my mate Bradley borrowed my BMX. He somehow managed to get his dick caught in the open brake lever and sliced his dick in half.
Double fractured thumb under a sealed nail, after being sandwiched between two hockey sticks, which you were stupid enough to not have bail pierced for 9- hours?
Walking barefoot and standing full weight on a Lego brick?
Riding a bike as a kid just wearing sandals. Stood up for a burst of power, foot slipped off the plastic pedal, dragging my toes along the road, and smashed my nuts on the top tube.
I know a fella who sliced the tips off three of his fingers at the same time. Whilst chopping a lemon...
Fractured scapula was my worst. I also broke 6 ribs at the same time and I barely noticed them because the shoulder pain was just so much worse.
Broken / bruised ribs. Jaysus.
Gallstones are probably up there near the top, along with having a minor operation with a series of local anaesthetics rather than a general as they couldn't find an anaesthetist (they had to hold me down on the operating table). Rode home one handed with a fractured collar bone, so thats definitely not in the same league.
However, passed out with a fractured kneecap, so not sure where to rate that, could be at the top, but I was unconscious so thankfully didn't feel it. Same with passing out after falling down the stairs and dislocating my hip.
sternotomy. pain so intense even morphine dont ease it.
gravel rash after a white van enema. In A&E they wanted to scrub the grit out from my left shoulder to my wrist, and my left arse cheek to my knee on my outer quad. I don't know what the gas and air consumption is for child birth, but I was huffing on that stuff like a teenager in the park.
When I face surfed on the north downs my face was so swollen they had to keep topping up the lidocaine as they were sewing up the full thickness tear of my left cheek and reattaching my bottom lip to my jaw. I think they were using a bicycle pump to inject instead of a syringe. 2 hours of needlework.
Trapping the wiener between saddle and tyre (I think) landing a jump of the back was excruciating. Fully expected to find a severed tip in blood filled shorts.
Two that spring to mind are:
1) liquifying an ab wakeboarding and, despite being in pain, staying in the boat a spotting for friends for a couple of hours. It was only when I started going grey and cold that I drove to ER (who told me off for waiting so long and then driving there)
2) Box jumps at the gym during which I missed and landed on my shin taking it down to the shiny white stuff. That hurt. Took ages to heal and then, predictably, I did it again. It's still really thin skin on that part of my leg and a very strange colour.
Of course, DC cardioversion hurts too, but that's a no-brainer.
Left leg tib fib, didn’t hurt at all when I did it, but after surgery I was climbing the walls. If I had a rusty spoon I would have done my own surgery just to make it stop.
I came back to say the same. A female associate said the same thing to me at the time I had them.Kidney stones is correct, any woman who has given birth and had kidney stones will tell you that.
I genuinely could have died when I had mine. I was on my way to Stoney Cove to go scuba diving when the pains first hit, if that had happened when I was 30m underwater I would have either drowned or ended up in the pot after an uncontrolled ascent...
I ended up in a disco bus on laughing gas instead followed by intravenous morphine in A&E. When I was admitted to a ward they changed it to Oramorph which barely made a dent in the pain.
Had kidney stones twice. Had to go one up on my wife giving birth to our 2 children 😆
This is nothing compared to some on here which I'm wincing about just reading them...
First broken collarbone. I got the train home (having ridden an hour plus to the station), then knowing that the hospital would try and cut my Rapha top off, I decided to have a shower first and change into loose fitting regular clothes.
Nearly passed out from the pain of lifting my arms up trying to take off snug fitting lycra top and base layer. Literally screaming in the shower. Got the bus to hospital, cringing every time it hit a bump.
Also these threads are inevitably full of blokes talking about collarbones, ribs etc and then a woman comes along and talks about childbirth. That usually wins the thread outright!
Two fractured vertebrae and four ribs, and nearly two months in hospital. Painful, I won't joke, but I would have been happy to die.
Made fracturing my pelvis and hip socket a breeze last January !
The worst chain related incident I had was a dropped chain after a big jump on a BMX track riding a HT. I stamped on the gas as soon as the bike touched down on a pretty steep downslope. My foot instantly hit the ground, front flipping me and the bike into the ground at lightening speed. After the initial hard impact to the top of my head, I skidded down the hard pack downslope upside down on my head into the tarmacked berm.
I'm a little embarrassed to admit I was not wearing a helmet. I am sure no one is surprised it didn't knock any sense in, although I do always wear a helmet now! I was a bit dazed, should have been KO'd, was not far off it, but carried on riding. Was still a bit woozy 2 days after not to mention battered and bruised. Got off lightly TBH.
One of my lads recently dislocated his knee while climbing at the wall.
According to my colleague, mother of three 'above average sized babies', her dislocated knee was far more painful than giving birth...
First broken collarbone. I got the train home (having ridden an hour plus to the station), then knowing that the hospital would try and cut my Rapha top off, I decided to have a shower first and change into loose fitting regular clothes.
Nearly passed out from the pain of lifting my arms up trying to take off snug fitting lycra top and base layer. Literally screaming in the shower. Got the bus to hospital, cringing every time it hit a bump.
That actually makes me feel better. When I was in the ambulance with my collarbone at end October PM we took off the stretchy RAB jacket, but she cut my Ion l/s top to shreds and I'd been regretting not trying to take it off. Given my lower lip was hanging off as well quite apart from lifting my arms getting it over my head would have been horrible.
when I compression fractured my spine I was initially worried all my trousers would now be too long. I think it was the drugs I was given at A&E as I was pretty out of it.four broken vertebra - slow speed over the bars - 1 year later for first ride, 2 years later for first 100 mile ride….4 years later for LEJOG…..
when the consultant told me after 5 days that I probably wouldn’t poo or wee again “but you’ll be ok, you can have a bag” , I didn’t imagine I’d ever be riding again….but thankfully he was wrong on all counts 👍
I should add that the only lasting effect is that I’m an inch and a half shorter 😬
Falling off the road bike and breaking my pelvis was pretty painful when they had to scrape me off the road and put me into the ambulance,with the help of a good old cocktail of drugs. I'm not sure if it was worse than the foreskin in the zip incident that I suffered about 30 years ago.The worst part of that is the knowing that to get you out of the situation the zip is going to have to go back down .
