im bored at uni revising and me and my mates are comedy geni as it is so we want to know how stw compares.....
your allowed to post anything funny in the confines of forum rules and utube links are included.
Chat Forum
tell me a joke or something funny...
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Posted 12 months ago #
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why not show us how funny your mates are first, so we know what we are competing against
Posted 12 months ago # -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c3y0CD2CoCs to get you started
Posted 12 months ago # -
I dropped a full tube of toothpaste down the toilet this morning.
I was absolutely crestfallen.
Posted 12 months ago # -
Opened a can of whup-ass and, Jesus, the smell! Turns out it was just a mislabelled can of regular ass.
Posted 12 months ago # -
I wasn't feeling well so I went to the doctor's.
The doctor explained, "well, I'm afraid you've got Onomatopoeia."
"Really?" I asked, "what's that?"
"Well," replied the doctor, "it's exactly what it sounds like."
Posted 12 months ago # -
You will never guess who I just saw at the petrol station - it was that Human Torch guy from the Fantastic 4 film.
I tried to get his autograph but he just kept rolling around on the floor screaming.
Posted 12 months ago # -
A bloke I was talking to the other day was bragging that the temperature of his balls was -273 degrees Celcius.
Absolute bollocks if you ask me.
Posted 12 months ago # -
Absolute gems from Cougar - I'll be getting much mileage from those.
Posted 12 months ago # -
Tbf Cougar, your one-liners are always gems...more please.
Posted 12 months ago # -
+1 for the Cougar!
Posted 12 months ago # -
I'm like a slower Tim Vine.
Wait, that's Jeremy, isn't it.
Posted 12 months ago # -
more please.
Oh dear. Ok.
What's the difference between zombies?
Zombies make honey, and zombies don't.
and
What kind of bees can we get milk from?
Boo-bees.
Posted 12 months ago # -
fwiw your 'pirated' joke still makes me snigger every couple of weeks
Posted 12 months ago # -
'pirated'
Which one is that?
Posted 12 months ago # -
Which one is that?
I bought a DVD the other day, on the back it said "3.142 stars out of 5."
I'm worried that it might be pirated.
Posted 12 months ago # -
Drug dealers in Barnsley have been selling Ecstasy in dental syringes, it's called E by Gum....
Posted 12 months ago # -
I saw some Tightrope Walkers the other day.
I thought, crisp flavours just keep getting stranger.
Posted 12 months ago # -
What goes "Mark!... Mark!... Mark!... Mark!... Mark!..."?
A dog with a hair lip.
Posted 12 months ago # -
@ a) pirated and b) crisps
Posted 12 months ago # -
What goes "Mark!...
Similarly,
What goes "Boo!... Boo!..."?
A cow with a cold.
Posted 12 months ago # -
Jeez the pirated joke took me at least 30 seconds. In off to hand my degree back
Posted 12 months ago # -
My local pub is getting a Man Utd dartboard. It doesn't have any doubles or trebles.
Man Utd fans will today unveil a "19 times" banner at Old Trafford.
In recognition of how many times they touched the ball Saturday
Posted 12 months ago # -
Vine-tastic!
Posted 12 months ago # -
The term "pikeys" has been deemed no longer politically correct.
They are now to be referred to as Caravan Using Nomadic TravellerS
Posted 12 months ago # -
woman sends hubbie to the the shops...
'can you pick me up a loaf of bread.. oh and if they've got any eggs bring back a dozen...'
bloke comes back with a dozen loaves..
'WTF is this all about !?' exclaims the wife..
'they had eggs..' replies the crestfallen fella...
Posted 12 months ago # -
And on the bee theme, where did Noah put them?
In archivesPosted 12 months ago # -
I went out with an Irish Catholic girl once. Very frustrating; you can take the girl out of Cork...
Posted 12 months ago # -
I went to the docs the other day after experiencing some problems with my gentlemans parts..
'Right then Mr Yunki.. drop your trousers and underwear and I'll take a look..'almost immediately she declared that I would have to stop masturbating..
somewhat dejected I enquired as to why..'So that I may examine you..' was her curt reply..
Posted 12 months ago # -
Due to an error in translation, Osama Bin Laden arrived at the gates of paradise to discover that he was going to be attended by 72 Vegans
Posted 12 months ago # -
Bloke walks into a doctors with a strawberry wedged up his bum, doctor says " you need to put some cream on that"
Posted 12 months ago # -
Man is driving down the road when he accidentally ran over a small child coming back from band practise carrying his triangle
Boom, boom, tssssccchh....
Posted 12 months ago # -
"Good grief, Holmes - why are you putting Silver Shred marmalade on that young lad's bottom ?"
"Lemon entry, my dear Watson"
Posted 12 months ago # -
Any more?
Posted 12 months ago # -
How many ADHD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
.....Want to go ride bikes?
Posted 12 months ago #
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