Even better he posted details on LandyTrackWorld.com
Posted: Wed Feb 01, 2012 12:32 am Post subject: Ever do something you will never EVER do again? Please read
So, today I drove maf to Devizes, with the intention of doing a few lanes solo on the way home. Perfectly fine I thought so long as I am careful and steady and know when to quit.
Maf is setup terribly in my opinion from the previous owner but still very capable.
So having done a few lanes around Devizes I decide to cut across Trowbridge towards keynsham, so I can pickup my stepson at 18:00 from longwell green on the way home.
I skim memory map and see a well placed byway on the way home.
Pipehouse lane near midford.
I drove the first half, past a defender 90 parked at its home, thinking "lucky bugger, living next to a byway. Bet he uses it all the time".
Now whilst in devizes I collected the lt230 transfer linkage as currently I can only select hi and low. Not diff lock.
Already you should be thinking "moron".
It's now dark, I have no diff lock, I am by myself, and doing a lane I have never even tried before.
Anyway, bei g a complete "moron" I go along the lane, and come to a dead end. But see something goes around the corner. So I turn into it to shed some light. I spot a steep drop. So I get out and have a look.
First thought "this is no ordinary byway". 2nd though "there is no way in hell maf can even fit past that".
So, I get back into maf, my phone tells me it's run out of space so stopped recording. I put it in reverse and I get wheel spin. There is so much aggregate down its just digging a big hole.
I'm now starting to think I'm need to get a move on to collect my stepson.
So I do one of the most stupid things I have ever done.
Into drive and off we go.
The first part was very very tight. Maf was the same size and crudely fitted. I'm becoming a little uncomfortable at this point.
Then there's a huge bolder in the track. So luckily being pretty big I re-align it and use some other rocks and tree trunks to make it reasonably passable.
Awesome. Over that. I'm sure that's the tricky bit done. Doesn't matter anyway, as I'm committed now anyway.
I carry on down and to my horror the road splits. Why the horror? Left looks off piste and crazily impossible. Right is extreme axle twisting, massively rutted from large ware flow and too much aggregate being put down. Both ate over grown with thick cutoff branches.
I only ever stood a chance at making it right, so I walked it (first sensible thing I did). It's so steep maf slides on the handbrake and nearly stays with park Engadget as well.
I put some rocks into the deepest section, that was roughly a single sided 2ft deep rut, on the outside of a corner on steep hill. "moron" is really hitting home.
Nobody can recover me, I'm late, out of my depth, no doubt stuck, and totally bricking it.
Back in maf, start talking to the car lots.
I get over the hump, and into the rut, nearly tipped but made it!! Finally!!
The rut switches sides and is even more pronounced. Trees line the sides that frankly I could only drive through without touching if the truck was level.
Totally and utterley out of my depth now, it's becoming dangerous, and I so do wish I hadn't been so stupid to put myself in this situation. At this point there is no fun what so ever.
I go for it, slowly, watching the axle twister, waiting to lift a wheel and with no diff lock get stuck.
Goes left, then right, NSR wheel lifts, and I know at that point for a fact it's game over, one huge truck stuck up an unrecoverable lane, with a plonker driver.
Maf starts to tip, just before she gains momentum I plant the throttle and aim to have the roof tip into a huge tree to stop it going over. Incredibly it works. Loads of creeping of suspension, and the NSF wheel miles up in the air, and the roof wedged against the tree.
Time to quit, but with no hope of recovery I edge the throttle and I still have no idea how, but it has traction.
I increase the throttle, and we start moving, the NSR window implodes, and the drivers door mirror snaps off. Maf starts to level and pulls itself out.
Now totally freaked, and just hell bent on getting out I struggle to not just plant my foot and hope for the best.
"must be the last hurdle, I can see car headlights and possibly the road for christs sake! I've learnt my lesson, damaged my truck, and still have to face the wife. (how would I feel if she took ZIGGY out and did similar?)...,
Really tall stone wall, and a massive tree stump ensuring nothing but a series will get past without having to articulate and no doubt plant the NSF Wing into the wall no doubt getting stuck.
I skim the wall with the wing all along, not touching once, trying not to snag my no doubt flat tyres On the rocks / branches before the wall.
I edge around the corner, NSR lifts, but eases down. Amazed!
Look ahead, and there is a tree arch that is 12 inches lower than maf's roof. It was semi rotten and over 6" thick. Even me swinging on it would snap it off, but it was flexible.
Close sunroof, push through. One almighty pop and maf is now a mobile tree. Sunroof did go through!
I slip and slide down to the road, unable to see left, and on a short distance right around a tight corner.
I wait for no headlights, and put maf's bonnet out, cats slow to right, back of maf slides but not too much for me to still make the turn right. Eventually get out, complete with a log on the front I can't quite make out in the dark.
No room to get out at the end of the lane or most the way down.
When I find somewhere to stop shortly after, there is basically a tree wrapped around the outside of the car, and draped over the back.
Removed, picked up stepson, home.
1. Mirror is fixable.
2. Rear window being fitted tomorrow, very lucky I could source one
3. Need new drivers door pins. Play in the hinge.
4. Rear offside door pushed in slightly. Can adjust out.
5. Small scrape on roof rail
6. Tiny dent in rear door
7. Possible exhaust leak. Underside of truck was sheeting off healthy 4" branches that had been laid down to fill some unavoidable ruts previously..
2. Will never do a lane I dont know by myself.
Hours after the event I have googled the lane. It's low use, riders can't make it down without putting their feet down, three different forum posts list it as impassible.
So, I'm amazed maf did what it did. I'm equally amazed at how quickly a few consecutively stupid decisions can land you in hot water. How maf didn't just go over when pulling off that tree I will never know, how I didn't rip the tyres, how it fitted down a lane that It simply wasn't supposed to I will never know.
I learnt alot today, and will never ever forget it. I'll be walking the route in the coming week or so with my old man and filming it.
I figured this was worth sharing, as it's affected me alot. You can pass this off as lunacy, or just a bit of aggressive offroading, what's the big deal. But for me, wow, lots to learn and change from, and never to be repeated.
Luckily my wife hasn't ripped my head off, but treading on egg shells doesn't come close.
So that explains the rocks Fin found