after reading this I’m quite glad to live where I do

I’ve got a neighbour like that too, the mad old bat insists that my car pokes into “her” space at the front of her house (and yes it does) but it’s simply the layout of the cul-de-sac and the houses, there’s nowhere else to go – all my other neighbours have to park their cars too and mine simply fits where it fits. The problem is compounded by her daughters complete inability to park the car in any space smaller than a football field.
Every morning, the daughter arrives at 6.30am, parks up ouside her parents house then walks off to the station. Every morning at 6.30, I get woken up by at least one (usually both) parents outside yelling instructions to their 34 year old daughter on how to park a ****ing Toyota Yaris in a space 6m long! “BACK A BIT LUV! TURN THE WHEEL NOW!

In fact when I moved into that house 2 years ago, the very first words the woman said were “What d’ya think ya doin’ parkin’ ‘ere? Not once has she ever even said “Hello”. Rude cow.

apparently he was friends with Patrick Moore and one time Patrick drove past but didn’t stop as thought he had a visitor due to the car outside

[quote]

love that – quite clearyly a nutter! 😀

The old lady opposite me has a disabled space and parks her little car in it. Parking speces are permit only and there’s often no room in my street so I park where ever possible up the surrounding roads. When we first moved in the old lady asked me to make sure I dont park too close as she has trouble geting in and out. No problem, everyone else on our little road knows this to. So the other day when walking the dog I saw someone parking quite close to her car, so I thought I’d very cheerily and politely tell them, I pointed out the disabled space and told him about the old lady and as there was loads of space it being the middle of a working day suggested he move up a bit. He was still in his car so I thought it wouldnt be too difficult. He told me to **** off and a few other choice words…… People can be so nice!

To be fair, I’m broke at the mo.

So sort me out and I’ll knack ‘er for you.

I gave up trying to reason with my neighbour.
He owned 2 cars at the time and one he insisted parking in front of our house despite having a parking bay in front of the house and a space in the road too.
I tried to reason with him as our little boy was about 6 months old and my SO has chronic back problems, so his perpetual parking in front of the house was making life difficult for her. He didnt care, i retired indoors before i did something he would regret.
He’s clearly a moron and wont be told, i just avoid him.

bigyinn – that clearly is very selfish – he should be ashamed of himself but i am sure he doesn’t care one bit 🙁

He said to my face “yeah im being selfish, so what. Its taxed and road legal, i can park it where i like” hence my retreat indoors.
There have been several run in’s since we moved in 8 years ago. He likes to bully people, but doesnt like it when i dont cower down in front of him. I could easily flatten him, but i dont see violence as a way forwards, oddly!

He makes my lovely neighbour seem wonderful by comparison.

My neighbour showed me his deeds once, to prove to me that he owned the pavement outside his house (he didn’t, & his deeds showed that). Strangely deluded though, if ever kids (a fair few in our road) chalked on ‘his’ pavement he would come out & chuck a bucket of water on it. We came to the conclusion he is a complete bully when, when our kids were younger, they would come in saying that he had walked past them playing telling them to **** off under his breath.(I’ll spare you the countless other cases, including his Mrs riding her moped through them). I just ignore(d) him as much as possible, I think he is a bit of a sadist who sees himself as some sort of victim. Barking.
Recently though, I think his Mrs has got altzimers (sp), but I find it very hard to think any way charitable towards them.

I am going to stop feeling sorry for myself over my ‘incident’. Quite clearly I have nothing to worry about compared to some people. 🙁

(Unless she is a witch and her ‘drop dead’ comment was actually a spell…)

I started a thread sometime ago asking how well people got on with their neighbours as so often seem to hear about pointless feuds. I’m lucky as I get on well with mine and we just pop into each others back gardens if we’re looking for each other. However, they’re all well past retirement age so hope that when they leave for the last time their replacements are OK; I chose to live in as expensive an area as I could afford in order to minimize the living near one of those chav-type families I hear about….

I think we are in need of some major shoe weeing!

I’m waiting for some fecker to put a description of odd behaviour up only for me to start thinking “Jesus wept, that’s me he’s talking about!!”

e.g. when the au pair was living next door and, coincidentally, would get undressed whenever I snuck out for a crafty roll-up, making sure to turn the blinds downwards so I could see into the room…I’m sure I was the subject of some “pervert next door” thread on an ex-pat French Au Pair forum!!!

The other one that’s happened on my road recently, unsubstantiated rumours, though one of my friendly neighbours told me…some new people have moved into a flat across the road and have been seen rifling through the paper recycling on a Wednesday morning, then scurrying back indoors after doing it for a few minutes. Assuming the worst, they’re after names and addresses to commit identity fraud, or of course, they could be terrorists…but you’d think they’d try a few streets along rather than the houses a few doors down from them…WTFFFF?!!

I would have moved my car and not wasted any energy personally-keep the peace.

One guy use my private parking spot forcing me to park 20 mins walk away.
I asked politely but he ignored the warnings.

After 2 months he was found shot dead in his car in my parking spot and brains on the.

My parking problems were gone.

Nurses across the road used to do stip teases etc so I went round to say hello/dinner/party…neighbours…everybody needs sexy neighbours…

Maybe you should do the same-either shoot her or have make love to her…

I’d move…

True story.

Wasn’t me.

The guy drove a yello cheap a chento and supplied drugs to kids in schools. Obviously cutomer service wasn’t very good.

My parents have a couple of neighbours that park across other peoples street-parking bits so that the husband doesnt have to get up to move his car so his wife can get hers out in the morning. It obviously hasnt occurred to them to put them away in the right order. The other problem is the road is pretty narrow so double parking causes a few issues, and parking opposite a drive means its pretty hard to get cars out of drives sometimes. Doesnt seem to stop them.

I keep my fun car on a neighbours drive, used it relatively rarely but still want to be able to use it. Only HER neighbours visitor decided she couldnt be bothered parking the car in front of the person she was visiting, it was going to get parked in front of the drive where my car was. After having to ask them to move it a few times (only 6ft further forward for gods sake, space never filled by anyone else!), being talked to like a child in front of the family she was visiting, I blew my top at her and pointed out she was either incosiderate, stupid or both and next time I’d just hook up the 4×4 and drag her box out of the way by its axles. She made another remark to the effect of “its not that much of a problem to come and ask me to move it”. I stopped, stared her in the eyes and said “its not that hard to think before you apply the brake”. Amazingly its not been parked there since. I’m waiting to hear it’s been burned out! lol

Where my mum lives parking bays are at a premium, there is one lady who parks her chelsea tractor over 2 bays for absolutely no reason, not slightly over but full on park in the middle of 2 bays, ive seen her, there are no disabled people to get in or out of the car, there is no reason for it. Once when I was taking my car to scrap in a couple of weeks anyway I “made it fit” into the space she had left before changing my mind and parking elsewhere.

its to stop her doors getting dinged.

my neighbours are great btw, very friendly and extremely nice.

my parents neighbors are nutters tho, and have been known to see if cars are over there driveway using lazer pointers/levels and stand in the drive with sound meters to see if people are being too noisy.

My neighbour saw me cleaning my bike outside my house using a bucket of water (I have no outside tap), I saw him looking and waved and said “bonjour”. He came over the next day and he’d bought me a hose which was plugged into his outside tap and told me to use it whenever I needed to (we pay for water here too!). Then he took me round to his garage and he’d cleared a space for my bike and got me a key and told me that he didn’t think my girlfriend would like muddy bikes living in the house!!

Just to balance the stories!

He fancies you.

In our last house, there were a block of garages, one opposit each house, so all of the neighbours plus us, parked our cars there, it suited us and was a considerate thing to do. Of course our elderly neighbour was the only one who insisted he block up the shared area by parking bang ourside his own house.
He was a lovely chap though and we got used to him. However when we first moved in he put string along the shared piece of front garden and mowed only his tiny half.
As the months went by, I started to mow all of it and cut his hedge too, for this he seemed grateful and started to be as friendly as all the other neighbours.

Luckily in our present house the neighbours all help out when it comes to parking and often let us use their driveways when friends call. It’s the only way as it’s a tiny cul du sac with no off road parking space.

sound meters to see if people are being too noisy.

I can understand that to some degree – having had one particular neighbour spend most of every summer revving a car with a straight-through exhaust and stereo blaring, or repeatedly kicking a casey against their garage door for hours on end. It can start to drive you mad. Especially when there are 3 dog-owning households over the back too that wake you at 3am 5am and 7am every day by letting their dogs out to the loo then not standing with them so they have to bark to be let back in. I swear my father will buy a shotgun soon!

As per bunnyhop though, now at my parents place all the neighbours share drives depending on need, which is funny considering they’re all semis in a normal street – looks like people are just stealing each others cars 😀
At my flat I park on any bit of road I can find, dodging chinese takeaway customers and the mass influx of churchgoers on thursdays and sundays.

Damn, never thought of that! I was in my cyclings shorts too so it must be that 😉

Sounds like some of the more financially stable need to buy a collection of pretty property from around the UK and put them all near each other, around somewhere called STW Ville or such like, where it seems, the majority of people on here are certainly a ‘live and let live’ type.

As I live on the edge of sheffield, i’ll have a 3/4 bed period property with a garage and a shed please, a cellar would be nice too.

My old dad is a bit bonkers, I helped him clear out his garage and he broke the frame on a complete door just so ‘someone else couldnt have it’ – crazy.

jt

My ex landlord gave me a key to his empty house, next to mine, so i could park my motor bike safely at night. When the house got rented out he extended a stone out house so the bike would fit safely in there.

Proper chap.

Sounds like a nice guy Peregrine – stay on the right side of him!

Friend of mine had a twit over the road from him that complained when anyone parked out side his house, on a public road. Couple of weeks ago the neibour knocked loudly on said friends front door but instead of letting the 2 Alsations out for a bite to eat his partner opened the window and asked how his “Horticulture” was coming on and did the smell bother his neibours. They haven’t heard from him since.

Apparently his neibour had worked it out but is scared to tell the police so told the other residents on the street instead. Strange how things get around.

lost me

Some sound personal advice for the OP, sleep with your neighbour. I always find sleeping with a woman stops them from speaking or contacting me again 8)

At uni we had a neighbour who used to move his car then place cones out to keep his space. As it was a crowded Glasgow tenement street and we had to park 2 streets away sometimes this did rather annoy us.

So we kept on nicking his cones (well he had obviously nicked them in the 1st place) till he ran out. You can’t beat students at nicking cones!

Have to say I have been very lucky with all my neighbours other than at that flat which also had noisy neighbours downstairs who would try and carry on the clubbing vibe when they came home at 4 am by playing loud crap dance music. That changed after we rang the polis who must have been bored as they popped round! The sound of the Police banging on the door shouting ‘Open up, it’s Strathclyde Police’ and the frantic flushing of the toilet downstairs still brings a smile to my face even now!

A 63 yr old in Lille this week shot a young couple dead who dared park in his ‘spot’ infront of his house on a busy road this week. Sad.

Rats, crowded territory, it all follows.

Moral, don’t live next door to rats.

Shame it ain’t that easy.

You live in a terraced house next door to hers and you are soon to be the proud parents of two bundles of joy. Are you sure she isn’t just getting her retaliation in early 😉

A while back I posted a thread about my neighbour having a few issues with us building an extension that would block a view from his downstairs toilet window.
At the time we had spent a bit of extra dosh to look at options to reduce the effect and we gave him (and his silent wife) a copy of said report so they know what the score was. At the time we were very VERY careful not to actually say what we were going to do as we didn;t know how much it would cost and if we would eventually do it. There were no issues with permits or anything, in fact we could have built a complete second storey and not actually told them. Anyway, that was maybe 5 months ago and the only thing we have heard from them was a chance meeting in the driveway where my wife asked him if he had got the report and we’d work out what the plan was etc. He went mental and started to call her all sorts of obscenities then complained that because his house only had one garage, and he has a Land rover he can;t fit it in there so he needed to park his wifes car on the road so that was our fault (?) and that our extension would lose him “50 grand on my house” so would we give him that money etc. My wife pointed out that we didn’t actually know if we would build it and that the report was given, as per the note on it, so they knew what we were being told and the options we had considered. Anyway upshot is they will not speak to us other than for him to call me a “Scottish ****” every time he sees me, i laugh because it a) winds him up and b) don’t really care and c) I know I am so him reminding me, given that he is English just tickles me.

The funniest thing is that we won’t build the extension anyway cos its too expensive ! Just plain odd. This is someone who bought a house with one garage that his car won;t fit in and seems to think that for some bizarre reason its our fault ? Anyway its an endless source of amusement to me esp as we’ve had to put survey markers in the drive now and the engineer has painted a big F-Off orange line right through the middle of where his car is which clearly shows that its parked in the middle of our section. One day, ONE DAY, i will make him move it. I’m just biding my time 🙂

My brother and his family live in a terraced house with rather thin walls. Of a weekend he and his wife are regularly entertained by the sounds of their middle-aged, recently divorced neighbour and her swinging parties / post pub gang-bangs. Apparently she (and the variety of men / women she invites back) are all rather vocal in their appreciation of each other.

It’s got to the point where they don’t really notice it any more but if anyone stays overnight they have to warn them about next doors nightly goings-on. My parents were rather shocked the first time they visited – rounded off when they sat in the living room on a Sunday morning watching the procession of men leaving the house.

Thankfully we live next to a rather nice elderly couple who have become like an extra Aunt and Uncle to my two girls and who we get on very well with.

You live in a terraced house next door to hers and you are soon to be the proud parents of two bundles of joy. Are you sure she isn’t just getting her retaliation in early

She isn’t a next door neighbour – she lives in the same little cul-de-sac. So no retaliation, just selfishness.

For balance, my other neighbour has swapped keys with us, in case we are locked out, and we both shared an appreciation of the air-stewardess who used to live opposite out back, and would do her ironing naked in front of her French windows.

I came home one day to find my elderly next door neighbour had been round and cut down my metal washing line pole with his angle grinder. He must have seen me the day before spending an hour failing miserably to dig it out. Another time he helped me lop the tops off the leylandi at the back of the garden with his wobbly old chainsaw stood on a rusty old step ladder. That was a bit scary.

He must have seen me the day before spending an hour failing miserably to dig it out.

At least you HOPE that was why he did it.

I am as friendly as some of you are with direct neighbours. One has a key/alarm code to our house when we are away and vice versa. Others borrow our hosepipe (not on meter 🙂 and others use our garden recycling bin. I also look after the unmetalled road for all 20 or so residents.

It is just this one mad bint. Ohh, and the guy a couple of doors down from her lets his dog use the lane as a toilet, but I am yet to catch him at it to bring him up on that particularly filthy habit (consideing there are several children and three more on the way it really does need stopping).

Never really had a bad neighbour but then if I was a 5ft6 tall male I bet there would have been some who would take the p1ss. After all life is like a school playground.