Triathlon content so if that offends leave now
A clubmate did a big triathlon race this weekend - the sort where you can track their progress online as they go around and go through interim chip timing spots. He's newish to the sport and this was his first ironman distance race. He's not very good, but gone from very overweight to just a bit overweight, but he's keen.
He completed the race inside the cut off time, just....only snag is he clearly cheated, or at the very least cut the course short by, ahem, accident! All going fine and steady and then 3 timing chip points fail to time him. When he goes through the next timing point he has apparently travelled the last 90km 10mins faster than all the pros in the field at a pace a lot of club roadies could not maintain for a flat 25mile TT and this was hilly terrain. He's probably skimmed 1hr 40mins off his time which would mean he would have failed to finish inside the cut off. I don't know if he sat in a bush (2 lap course) and jumped out later or took a short cut on the 2nd lap.
These sorts of events at that end of the field are clearly just personal challenges rather than races. If you choose to cheat, well I guess that's up to you. And as such I'm not sure why I'm bothered. I wouldn't be but he's all over the club's Facebook site extolling his performance and gently ribbing another clubmate (who is another league faster) whose bike split he beat.
It would be cruel to publicly 'out' him as a cheat (it really is blindingly obvious if you know what you are looking at in the results, not just a guess that might be wrong) as his wife and family are all over him with how proud they are and tbf not my place to do so anyway. I'm toying with having a quiet word when I see him at the weekend with a nod and a wink and recommending that coming over all 'riding god' will get him found out and he should become a little modest and coy, or just smiling from afar at the plonker he is making of himself!
The best bit is his wife wants to buy him a Cervelo p5 as a 'reward' for doing so well (I need a new wife!) - it'll be amusing what excuse he finds when he is an hour and a bit slower than he was this time on his current Boardman!