Have a look at this University drinking league, Leeds met students drink 26.7 units a week on average – a bottle of vodka a week for yourself.

Someone is telling porkies….

I was drinking about as much as her and I thought I migh thave a problem. It wasn’t affecting my work or my home life but I was reluctant to do without it. Since then have been not drinking on school nights and I feel righteous but not any healthier or happier.

If she got upset likelihood is that she has dependency issues if not health issues. Gently gently I would say, people are very sensitive about such things because the second they admit it they are obliged to fix it.

You were right to raise it though because it is clearly concerning you and that is enough. If you can’t concern yourself with the welfare of your loved ones then you really should worry, the main thing is that you are sceptical of your motivations, you must always ensure that you are behaving in the best interests of others and not fulfilling your own agenda.

It sounds pretty mild but best nipped in the bud before it gets out of hand. Good luck.

I think to raise the concern with your loved one is perfectly valid, but possibly was a diplomacy fail. Maybe, as mentioned, the: ‘do you think we’re drinking a little too much hon?’ approach would have been a bit easier to swallow…

Have a look at this University drinking league

I would be deeply, deeply surprised if that table isn’t a gross underestimation.

Well it’ll be an average of all students probably, those who drink and those who don’t, so they’ll bring the mean down a lot.

I find this useful for guaging how much a person really drinks
esp as we ALL underestimate how much we drink

The cost of all that booze! Plenty of scope for increasing fees I reckon.

I consider myself to have issues if I feel like having a quick drink more than once a week, it’s usually a sign I’m not overly happy with something, but I don’t see any issue with telling someone they may have an issue, I just don’t subscribe to the “you’re an adult, it’s your own problem” attitude. Any sensible logical person would take that from a loved one as a reasonable question with good intent.

How come we are only being told these sorts of guidelines when 20 years ago it was never mentioned.

Because 20 years ago the info was only just starting to be gathered in any real gusto?

docrobster – Member
I find this useful for guaging how much a person really drinks
esp as we ALL underestimate how much we drink

No WE don’t

French people drink lots of wine, and they seem quite nice.

Me and ‘er indoors probably drink too much. Some weeks when I’m doing the Walk Of Shame, taking the empties out for recycling, it looks like the Rolling Stones have been recording Exile On Main Street in our house for the preceding fortnight.

But like the OP, I’d say the majority of it is us opening a bottle of wine to have a glass with our dinner, then her quietly tanning the rest of it.

I might have a couple of beers on a given evening seldom more than that.

Amazingly, the best way to avoid drinking alcohol is to not buy it in the first place – stocking up on special offers and multi-buys just sees you go through a larger amount in the same amount of time.

I find this useful for guaging how much a person really drinks

Really? I am a drinker but it doesn’t have a ‘nothing’ option.

Amazingly, the best way to avoid drinking alcohol is to not buy it in the first place – stocking up on special offers and multi-buys just sees you go through a larger amount in the same amount of time.

i dont agree really – we have bottles of whisky, cachaça, rum and over 300 bottles of wine in the celler.. our glass recycling has never gone cazy..

i think its more a little bit about control? The brits ‘in general’* dont seem to have this..

*widely sweeping statement, but since leaving the motherland and living elesewhere i’ve seen a huge difference..

French people drink lots of wine, and they seem quite nice.

For fear of being misquoted, I think there is a difference in the way the French view and drink alcohol, not implying anything in relation to the OP.

esp as we ALL underestimate how much we drink

Do we really? I think not.

And you can stuff your scientists.

deadlydarcy – Member

Jeezus, if I drank a bottle of wine a night, I’d be a right state by the end of the week! Jeezus, if I drank a bottle of wine a night, I’d be a right state by the end of the week night! 🙁

Her reaction suggests, she might think she has a problem. Why not suggest you both cut down for a while?

we ALL underestimate how much we drink

No we don’t. Median weekly units is zero.

scotia – Member

i dont agree really – we have bottles of whisky, cachaça, rum and over 300 bottles of wine in the celler.. our glass recycling has never gone cazy..

i think its more a little bit about control? The brits dont seem to have this..

Yeah, I’ve got a cupboard full of spirits as well and they rarely get touched. The odd G&T in the summer, an occasional glass of single malt, a bottle of Fino sherry that gets used in stir-fries in lieu of rice wine vinegar, and the same bottle of tequila that’s survived about four house moves.

Beer and wine, on the other hand…

did you notice the 300 bottles of wine?!

Apologies to the teetotalists! 😳

I’m not a teetotalist but neither do I underestimate how much I drink.

scotia – Member

did you notice the 300 bottles of wine?!

Having a cellar’s different though, innit? You have to have a cellar in the first place.

I’d imagine if I had that kind of set-up there’d be a load of bottles in it that were too good to drink or were being kept laid down for special occasions so special that you’d never actually get round to drinking them.

this is quite revealing too

I certainly don’t under estimate my alcohol consumption. Inthink if you do then you probably drink too much. This week one bottle of beer on Sunday night, no alcohol Monday to Thursday, probably a g&t and a glass of sparkling on Friday night, couple of beers on Saturday and that’s pretty much an average week. Might have a beer if we go out for lunch at the weekend.

Not looking to annoy or aggravate anyone but to those that drink on a weeknight for example, why are you drinking?

I used to but looking back i cant think why, I think it was more a habit then anything else.

I started road biking then we had a baby, there was always something else that needing bought so we stopped buying drink. Before we knew it we are both loads healthier and sleep better, I lost 3 stone since January some through removing drink I imagine but probably more through exercise.

Rarely drink now not for any moral high ground but i just hate hangovers and the thought of outdoing my hard work on the bike.

Think the biggest factor is having a child though did anyone else find alcohol consumption reduced after a baby in the house?

I used your calculator above there Docrobster based on our last weekend get together I drank about 70 units, I’ve not added the Saturday nights yet.

must be just people that come to see me then 😉
but then I work in a former pit village where 7 pints a night is the norm. thirsty work you know

why are you drinking?

Because I like wine.

I drink because yeah I like it, it’s great way to relax and it’s a nice social thing but it was easy for me to pretty much stop. I go weeks without a tipple.

carbon337 – Member
Think the biggest factor is having a child though did anyone else find alcohol consumption reduced after a baby in the house?

My wife and I were never big/regular drinkers, but having a child dis top the occasional heavier night. At the time, I was the only driver and we were always worried that we’d have to jump in the car unexpectedly for some reason 🙂

Rarely drink now not for any moral high ground but i just hate hangovers

You don’t have to always drink enough to give you a hangover you know.

should have said rarely drink heavily for the hangover statement.

Just been chatting to Mrs about it, we think it was her pregnancy that kicked it off – me sitting drinking on a random Tuesday night in November didnt seem fair when she couldnt have one. Kind of just got out of the habit. We were about 4 bottles a week between us so not huge amount but then normally a big night once a weekend.

Its difficult talking about others drinking without firstly pissing others off but secondly sounding like some sort of born again dogooder.

Apologies to the teetotalists!

I said MEDIAN not MEAN – I drink alcohol, but very seldom to excess!

I reckon if she got upset at that, it’s because she knows she drinks too much. I drink less than her and I have too much – if regular.
Not that I know anything about her.

It may be five years, it may be fifteen, but you are going to pay for this….

– 😆 Not just me then!

The way to get yourself out of this, is to explain that you don’t think she’s an alco or anything – it’s just the extra calories are making her arse bigger by the bottle. This way, she’ll know you were only concerned for her. No, really……

I said MEDIAN not MEAN – I drink alcohol, but very seldom to excess!

Your MEDIAN isn’t zero, then. I think you mean MODE.

it’s just the extra calories are making her arse bigger by the bottle

The danger there is the OP’s head might get bleedier by the bottle.

The French, Italians and Spanish drink constantly, we drink in binges. They’re always pissed, we aren’t, hence the problem. Remember kids, don’t drink and drive, drink and ride.

Makes me laugh that someone who drinks between 6 and 12 beers a week (2-3 beers 3-4 nights a week) is being told they drink too much !
.
And that they have no right commenting on their partner drinking 4-5 bottles of wine a week !!
.
He are having 12-24 units a week.
She is having 27-36 a week

Do you drink piss for beer? The beer I drink is ~3 units a pint, which would mean he’s actually drinking a very similar number of units to his girlfriend. You can argue about the different allowable units for men and women if you like, but that’s for average men and women. He’s certainly drinking enough to make his high horse a bit wobbly.

To OP yes that’s too much.

I don’t see any wrong with telling someone s/he is drinking too much. Well in fact tell them off … as direct as possible. No pussy footing. Hurt the feeling? Well, it bloody well be … I would rather hurt the person feeling than having to nurse him/her back to health.

Tell the person not to be a drama queen and drink less or die young. Well dying young is fine but just don’t prolong it as it’s a hassle to people around.

There is no excuse whatsoever for not being able to take criticism or being told off as an adult.

If you work on Alcohol by volume 4 75cl 12.5% bottles a week equals 12 pints of average strength beer / lager / cider.

Sound familiar?