I am by nature rather meek and mild, however once out on the road on my bike I find myself rather short tempered and irritable with inconsiderate road users (not exactly road rage, but heading in this direction).

I had some bloke in a passengers seat lean out of the window yesterday and yell at me to keep in (presumably because they had to wait a few seconds to follow me around a corner before they could speed on by); I raised the middle finger by way of retort and then rather wished I hadn’t. Fortunately they carried on, but one day someone going to stop and wallop me; there are plenty enough nobs out there on the road and I don’t want to be one of them.

So, tips for keeping calm and just letting it wash over me please.

Blow them a kiss instead.

I found that having the driver stop, get out the car and assault me was quite a good way of keeping things in perspective.

Don’t sink to their level anymore. Not too often, anyway

Edit – Jambo +1. Seems to confuse them

Sounds like you kept your calm quite well. I once chased a bloke in his car on my bike after he called me a dickhead for no reason, I was planning on smashing his car window with my bikelock. Now Im rather glad he drove off quickly.

Thread title instantly made me think of Reservoir Dogs and the clip in the tune ~1min20secs…

[video]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHDYfoRYcqQ[/video]

Almost 25 years old now! 😯

The trouble is generally you’re dealing with people whose apparently unprovoked aggression towards cyclists is merely an outward sign of much deeper issues, being mildly inconvenienced whilst driving is merely the spark that sets them off.

Just think about how horrible it must be to go around that angry all the time, for them and those around them, you’re out riding, enjoying yourself and they’re sat there fuming at everything.

Who’s winning?

That’s the logic that I use, used to road rage like anything when I commuted in Birmingham but have calmed down greatly since.

Don’t flip the bird unless you have the muscle to back it up.

It’s difficult, I had a horrible temper until my early twenties I’d say, horrendous, it’s now under control 99.9% of the time and I’ve chilled out.

People generally perceive me as laid back and easy going on whole I think. At work I’m grumpy and a bit snappy, but respected for doing my job as well as I can and it’s understood I just don’t tolerate mediocrity I think.

Twice towards the end of last year I lost my rag whilst driving, once because a lorry driver nearly reversed into me twice, the next because a guy gobbed off at me as I drove past him leading his horse, there was no drama, I was going snails pace. On both occasions it was just verbal drivel, but it scared me and one resulted in an (informal) complaint to my manager as it was on works time and they guy found out who I was.

Made me think, I can’t go back there, you just have to let it wash over you. I’m a big(ish) bloke so people generally back down if I get fired up I think, but there’d always someone bigger than or more nuts than you, and in any case, intimidation isn’t a skill to have on the CV…….

Deep breaths and laughter, the laughter confuses them.

Me and a mate came out of the woods with our lights on and a driver slammed his breaks on got out and slipped over..we were laughing so much he got back in and drove off..HaHa.The moral of the story is just laugh it off, it will probably wind them up even more..

Blow them a kiss instead.

^^This^^

I have bawled at bad drivers plenty in the past, it does no good. It Potentially just gets you a slap, plus lycra and disco slippers isn’t fighting gear…

If you do get abuse from an angry driver, honestly, blow them a kiss, give a cheery wave and smile or wish them a “good morning”…

There’s generally a very small window of opportunity for these little exchanges, if you don’t respond in kind and are simply pleasant or jovial, it utterly wrong foots them and instantly makes the antagonist look like an even bigger prick.

Unfortunately the blowing a kiss isn’t the answer sometimes, my friend always said to do this but he ended up beaten up by the side of the road by two thugs who then jumped up and down on his bike and wrecked both wheels as a final insult.

one day someone going to stop and wallop me

Paging Mikewsmith…!

But seriously, blowing a kiss can be just as antagonistic as flicking a finger or two. Either ignore and ride on or adopt an attitude whereby every car that doesn’t wipe you out is a good car and secretly thank them for not doing so.

Perhaps chant this…

there are plenty enough nobs out there on the road and I don’t want to be one of them.

…as your mantra when vexed.

Just let “idiots shouting things” become part of the road noise. It’s inevitable, you can’t do anything about it, and it’s not personal.

Just ignore.

Minimizing busy traffic on your routes minimizes the expectations of confrontation thereby reducing stress and improving your ability to ignore it when it does arise.

Don’t flip the bird unless you have the muscle to back it up.

I’m very happy to fight people, but realise it’s not a great idea. I was always a bit nervy riding a racer with silly disco slippers, as, if there were an incident they don’t make the best shit-kickers

Having been training kung fu for a while I can say its definitely changed my attitude; I’m still as aggressive as I always was, but I can let the actions of dickheads wash over me more easily now. I think the trick is to be able to let something go as soon as it happens & not react in a negative way.

every car that doesn’t wipe you out is a good car and secretly thank them for not doing so.

This is very true, and a good practice.

Otherwise, just repeat ‘I am one with the Force; the Force is with me’.

think there is a TKD club on here who could change your perspective 🙂

just video them put on you tube and await the public humiliation then get on tv and await the royalties.

screaming abuse at a driver who is in control of a ton plus of metal is not always a good idea, would you call a chap with an axe or a knife a dickhead.

its not personal

This ^^
The type of people who would shout out of a moving car at some random other road user are dickheads, they’re always dickhheads, and it makes no difference who they are being dickheads to.
Not a good idea to get involved with them, you never know what might get out of the car.

The one piece of advice my dad imparted to me when I first started to learn to drive which has stood me in good stead, is to assume everyone else on the road are complete and utter imbeciles and that they will do something unexpected at some point. That piece of advice has prevented me from being entangled in multiple bumps, prangs, crashes both in my car and on my bike. So when such imbeciles do actually do something stupid i’m not entirely surprised and therefore never get angry and upset. How can you get any with an imbecile? They don’t posses the wherewithal to understand what they do or what’s going on around them. Pity them.

Don’t engage with them at all…….. telling a tw8t he is being a tw8t, won’t stop him being a tw8t.
And if you are not careful you’ll end up in a who can be the biggest Tw8t competition, and who wants to win that.

Thanks for the advice; I’ll try and concentrate on just enjoying the ride.

Lol @ speshpaul

If I’m on my own then the most I’ll stretch to is a shrug and a dissapointed shake of the head. Sometimes it’s just a cheery wave, that could be interpreted as sarcastic.

In a group, I might get the middle finger out.

But then once I got so incensed that I chased the driver up the road and smashed their mirror off. I just don’t see how it’s possible to control your emotions quite so accurately all of the time.

Don’t engage with them at all…….. telling a tw8t he is being a tw8t, won’t stop him being a tw8t.
And if you are not careful you’ll end up in a who can be the biggest Tw8t competition, and who wants to win that.

This is how see it too. Don’t engage and you have a shouty nob being shouty. Engage and you have two shouty nobs being shouty!

Just try to remember that no matter how strong and ninja-like you are, you get your butt handed to you cos you’re wearing carbon soled disco slippers so won’t be able to fight back.

But then once I got so incensed that I chased the driver up the road and smashed their mirror off. I just don’t see how it’s possible to control your emotions quite so accurately all of the time.

This. ^^ Called fight or flight response for a reason.

I’m terrible at controlling my anger on a bike if someone’s put my life in danger whereas in other walks of life I find incompetence amusing.

I got convicted of criminal damage at 19, so guy pulled a proper dangerous cross lane manoeuvre in Stockport and then pulled over and got out of his car to in his words ‘kick my face in’, as I had flipped him the bird. He realisee I was considerable more radged than he was, despite being half his size, and jumped backed in his car. But I’d fully lost in and booted off his wing mirror and attempted to put it through his windscreen. Deservedly, the Police that were passing in the other direction, intervened. It was a trip to the station and subsequent visit to the magistrates court, and nearly cost me my job. But entirely my fault, and I’ve always been deeply embarrassed by it.
Made me really focus on the fact that no matter who is ‘right’ or ‘wrong’, you can only be responsible for your own behaviour. So I guess I grew up really, the price of not doing so can be life changing in many ways. I still have some banter with driver’s but have never flipped out since.

I got convicted of criminal damage at 19, so guy pulled a proper dangerous cross lane manoeuvre in Stockport and then pulled over and got out of his car to in his words ‘kick my face in’, as I had flipped him the bird. He realisee I was considerable more radged than he was, despite being half his size, and jumped backed in his car. But I’d fully lost in and booted off his wing mirror and attempted to put it through his windscreen.

If this is the extent of the story, then I really don’t see why it was in anyone’s interest to go as far as prosecuting you. All sorts of people get let off for much more serious crimes because it’s not in the public interest. Giving a 19 year old a criminal conviction for having a bit of argy with an aggressive motorist seems a bit disproportionate.

Oh, okay.

I can totally understand why people loose their temper; if a pedestrian was taken to walking down the street yelling abuse at every stranger he saw that he didn’t like fur some random reason, the police and public just didn’t put up with it and something would be done about it. But because the crap police just let abuse of cyclists ride, no pun intended, it isn’t surprising that people are tempted to react. But if you can, it’s always better to just let it go. If it does end up in fisty cuffs, and you win, you’ll only end up in court with the mincing driver crying like a baby and the crap police backing him all the way.

Repeat “I shall not allow these people to pollute my mind with anger”.

I used to be like you OP. Last year sometime did something daft in a car whilst I was walking. Have him the finger, he got out, things escalated quickly and I kicked his rear lights in. This caused him to run back in to his car, lock the doors and speed off.

I felt like shit when I got home and called the police to report the incident. Ended up paying out to repair his car and the police asked me if I wanted to press charges against him for his driving. I didn’t do so.

The whole thing was ridiculous and now I just ignore all vehicular based stupidity. It’s not worth it and just ends up spoiling the day for all involved

i try to restrict myself to a gentle shake of the head if the incident has passed. I’ll shout like a good one if someone is about to do something silly with me in the way.
Last time I chased a car, I caught it up when it stopped, but I stayed behind it, calmed down, and felt a bit silly. It had a British Triathlon sticker and bike rack on it, go figure…

Just play to your strengths. If it gets really out of hand you’re always wearing a helmet.

I always dream that if I was in a situation that got horribly hot I’d have the reactions to do some key to bush action and ride away.

key to bush action

Woah, that’s quite specialist; an on the spot shave with a blunt instrument in revenge for having an attitude problem.

Cool and creative…