Some cycling jokes. I wrote them myself. Can you tell?

Q. Where does Johann Sebastian keep his energy gels?
A. In his Bach pocket.

Q. How do fish keep fit in the winter?
A. On a turbot trainer.

Q. What drug does a postman use if he wants to ride his delivery bike faster?
A. GPO.

Thank yew.

[/TUMBLEWEED] 😉

😐

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amusement

Amusement is the state of experiencing humorous and entertaining events or situations, and is associated with enjoyment, happiness, laughter and pleasure.

Current studies have not yet reached consensus on the exact purpose of amusement, though theories have been advanced in the fields of psychology, psychiatry and sociology. In addition, the precise mechanism that causes a given element (image, sound, behavior, etc.) to be perceived as more or less ‘amusing’ than another, similar element to a particular individual is not clearly understood.

It’s the way ya tell em

I chuckled 😳

Good Effort.

See the Head after class.

😥

Oh, and on a non-cycling theme…
There’s a new camper van being built in Sunderland , specially for opera fans.
It’s called the Nissan Dormer.

Dad jokes are social currency amonst certain friends of mine 8)

I’ll join in..

Two Nuns in a bath.

One says to the other, “Where’s soap?”

Other replies “About 10 miles from Gisburn”

😐

^ by Jove! I think he’s got it!

Q. Why do Lancashire folk who use Persil never find 1970s Belgian cycling champs wearing their cycling gear?
A. because it gets the Merckx out of their sweaters.

a man walks into a bar. OWWWWWWW! 😛

Why is Brant rubbish at board games?

Because he always rolls on one.

Why did the Brooks saddle cross the road?

To get to the udder’s hide.

Right, I’m off now!

My now out of date “joke” about what some mockingly call “banjo country”.
What’s the difference between Todmorden and Hebden Bridge?
In Tod you’re expected to marry your cousin whereas in Hebden it would be a civil partnership 😉

Why didn’t Lance Armstrong ride MTBs?

Because everyone would realise he was off-road.

(I really must go out & do things).

Why didn’t the bike cross the road?

Too tired.

Q. How do fish keep fit in the winter?
A. On a turbot trainer.

This one made me smile, thanks.

What do you get, if you cross a river with a bicycle?

Wet feet.

What is a pirates favourite groupset?

XTR.

The best by far but some decent efforts

Well, if we’re doing bad jokes in general….

Yorkshireman takes his cat to the vets. Vet looks in to the basket and says, “Is it a tom?”

To which our Yorkshireman replies, “No, you daft idiot, it’s right there in the basket!”

The best by far

*flounces*

What did Kenny Rodgers say after buckling the wheels on his road bike?

Roubaix, God please just turn around.

Venetian blinds have saved humanity.

Without them it would have been curtains for us all.

I was clearing out the store room at work the other day and found a huge roll of bubble-wrap.

I asked my boss what to do with it and he said “Just pop it in the corner.”

Took me four hours.

I was hit in the head last night with a bottle of Omega 3 tablets.

Fortunately, I only sustained super fish oil injuries.

A woman stopped me on the street and said she recognised me from vegetarian club, but I’ve never met herbivore.

A geeky one for good measure,

Seems you can register almost any TLD now; except .cheezeburger, since ICANN has .cheezeburger.

Oh, and another.

I’ve started making beer.

It’s dead easy, you just pour root beer into a square glass.