My GF has been away in Vietnam teaching english and We had been together 3 and a half years strong. I knew somthing was up do to the lack on personal connection we were making on the phone and through e-mail and thought we might be drifting apart ,i rarely recieved a reply from any message i sent her through txt or e-mail. I don't think she had the courage to talk about it on the phone. BUT FACEBOOK……..ARE YOU F**KIN KIDDING ME. WTF………………………………………………………………………………………
Granted there aren't many instant lines of comunication when it comes to being abroad but i had presumed that three and a half years meant a bit more than that. Am i being a douche here? i'm not sure. I'm slightly confused.

Ouch. Did she write on your wall, or was it by private message?

ohhhh, harsh

In the chat. Not on my wall.

Get Ro to kick her in't chuff.

That's just plain out of order IMO.

There isn't a good way to break up with people. That does seem harsh though.

Blimey, that sucks:(
Women are evil though.
Did she mention someone called ro?

Get a new girlfreind, plenty in Tesco in Heswall on a thursday night after 7.00pm.

Send all her naughty pics you may have of her back to her on facebook

lol, i live in Heswall and Tescos does have some treats in store that has to be agreed.

That's shite, but at least she didn't just change her status to 'single' as happened to one of my mates

It's all communication, isn't it?

It's all communication, isn't it?

Only just Mol, only just…

Harsh way to go…

She could of just put up pics of her new bloke and let you work it out

I got dumped by email once – sent it back with one of those standard 'address not found' responses.

Douche

How long has she been over there for?

Since the 20th of febuary.

I'm astonished BB – I didn't think anybody would finish with you. Dreamboat.

Four months? Thats a longtime to go without affection/companionship which is harsh but true.

Look on the brightside- Better now though than later IMO.

Painful as it might now be, at least you are not now dating the sort of person who would break up a long term relationship via instant messaging.

Plenty more pebbles on the beach.

Plenty more pebbles on the beach

Plenty of BETTER and shinier pebbles on the beach.

It wont seem like that right now but you'll look back and smile at what you have rather than what you had.

Why did she go in the first place? Look back for the signs etc.

Hora, there are many skills you lack but surely counting isn't on of them?

That Cranberry is an excellant point. I would like to mention, just to add to the info, that i went travelling for 8 months after the first year of us deciding to be together and subsqeuantly made a desicion that i would contact her as much as possible, which i did. Infact she printed out all of our correspondance and put it in a book for me. I know it's a different situation i.e she is working out there. But principally it shows that i was willing to make the commitment and now the tables have turned she can't handle it. I'm not sure what answers i'm looking for. It's possible i want to try and hate her, but hate is somewhat close to love. Rationally i think it's best to 'Nothing' her but i'm not sure how i get to that point.

She probably didn't go to Vietnam at all, she just moved to the next town and has been avoiding the places she knows you will be. All the people you both know are are probably in on it.

It's the only sensible explanation

Wee in her shoes.
(when the opportunity arises)

I've never understood how long distance relationships are supposed to work at all. That's a pretty harsh way to do it though.

She went to teach in Vietnam because this is somthing she has wanted to do since she was in university 7 years ago. I see what you mean about the signs. There probably were some before she went away but i did'nt spot them maybe or possibly i did'nt want to believe it. i don't know….. i may just be over thinking things, you know how it is.

Cant you start one of them Facebook group things…
"I sh*#$ed [name] [name]" type affair…
Get as many folk as possible to join.

Or just wish her luck & move on.

How long is she supposed to be away for?

coming home in October

Wee in her shoes.

Mail it over via courier with instructions?

plenty in Tesco in Heswall on a thursday night after 7.00pm.

Tescos in Heswall aka God's Waiting Room? Shirley shome mishtake; or just very "niche" desires…

So, no more "Me love you long time", then?

Sad, but people are often cowards in these situaitons and do something in a way that they may well regret.

Write to her, express your sadness, tell her you love her. Not much else you can do. Except take a trip to Heswall Tesco, it seems.

Bon courage.

She must have left a lot of her possessions with you so I'd guess there are plenty of shoe/wee opportunities? You probably wouldn't take boots to Vietnam so some good capacity to fill.

IMHO revenge isn’t worth it; you’ll end up regretting it.

Granted that was a pretty lousy way for her to end it, but it is probably down to her not having the courage to say it to you over the phone rather than treating you like a piece of chewing gum.

The best course of action is to try your best to put it down to experience learnt and move on. Easy to say I know but I’ve been there and it is simply the best way forward.

coming home in October

So thats 6months apart Sam?

Strikes me it'll be a holiday romance (living a dream/no grey skies etc). Bang back to earth when shes back.

..When shes back she might want to talk. If she does reply its probably not for the best as your girlfriend wouldn't approve.

I worked in the US for 14 weeks sometime ago, and on my return the missus at the time, had moved down to Eastbourne to work and was frosty cold on the phone, she basically told me she didn't want to go out with me anymore.

But i wasn't letting her get away with it that easy, i demanded to see her and jumped on the NationalExpress down there, listening to the wedding present all the way down to get myself fired up, she was working so i listened to more TWP and then gave her a right rollicking, we called it quits and we remained friends.

best to get it off your chest, . . I'm not suggesting a trip to Vietnam, but I'd insist on a mutual coming together when she gets back so that she can explain herself, . . .if she agrees of course!

I had another brief relationship with a girl who went traveling to India, I was even ticking the days off until her return, she sent me postcards and letters explaining how it had opened her eyes and she'd met some bloke who gave her massages and rides on elephants, picture it, . . I still didn't really click and she dumped me as soon as she got back, . . she refused to see me for me to get some things from her house, so I left a nice letter in return, explaining how upset I was, . . . .

p.s. I'm still listening to The Wedding Present and am getting married next year, so have faith in a happy ending, this ones not going anywhere, I keep her in a cage under the sink unit!! 😉

Hora, when did you get all "dad" like??

Plenty more pebbles on the beach

Plenty of BETTER and shinier pebbles on the beach.

It wont seem like that right now but you'll look back and smile at what you have rather than what you had

Four months? Thats a longtime to go without affection/companionship which is harsh but true.

Look on the brightside- Better now though than later IMO.

Your little ones gona love you saying those to him in the future 😉