What a ball ache !

whoever comes up with the funniest answer will win 10p and I’ll donate £2 to a charity of your choice.

You the people of the forum get to vote and have your say !

Ps I really have lost my keys and er in doors is not impressed so any good ones I will relay back !

In the door ? That’s where i often leave mine ….

What a ball ache !

Are you sitting on the keys?

are you stuck in the house, or locked out?

if you’re in the house, start looking in shoes, for some reason i occasionally put keys in shoes.

don’t ask me why i do this…

ahwiles – Member

are you stuck in the house, or locked out?

neither at the mo…wife or kids will let me in when I get home.

Have you looked in your other hand? That’s usually where mine are when I lose my keys (in my other hand, not yours).

Failing that, check the last place you’d look, conventional wisdom would suggest that’s where they are.

Left my car keys in the boot lock ,couldnt find them so used the spares .Yes I drove round with my keys in the boot lock all morning !!

check the last place you’d look, conventional wisdom would suggest that’s where they are.

the last place I’d look is in Russel Brand’s chest hair so maybe you should try and track him down?

I can see how this will end when I get home and start looking, lots of swearing followed by more swearing and chucking clothes about…and my wife will be saying really useful things like ” I never loose my keys” and ” oh your always loosing keys” along with lots of other useful comments and will she offer to help….NO !

Your “outside girlfriend” has them.

Have you been to a swinger’s party recently?

hang on a second….

donald – Member

Have you been to a swinger’s party recently?

This gets a vote from me !

This is what wives are for.

As I’m always asked

“Have you had a proper look? Or just a man look?”

The last two sets of keys that my wife lost turned up in the fridge and the wheelie bin.

Same place you left your phone charger ?

I think I saw your kids eating them.
Get some laxatives on the way home.
And a chainsaw just in case.

Look,there it is

They’re in that drawer of random rammel & clutter that you’ve already looked in 3 times.

I’ve got them. Just in your bedroom trying on your smalls 😈

Look under the pile of peanuts next to your computer screen. 🙄

Well, where did you last have them?

woody2000 – Member
I’ve got them. Just in your bedroom trying on your smalls
POSTED 3 MINUTES AGO # REPORT-POST

My wife’s are far nicer and don’t have any stains at the rear !

Has your wife been to a swinger’s party recently?

I know… 😉

donald – Member
Has your wife been to a swinger’s party recently?
POSTED 6 SECONDS AGO # REPORT-POST

Not this month as far as I know !

I’ve got them, but I’m in bed with the flu and they’re at work. I’ll get my colleague to courier them to you. Do let me know if you want a tracking number.

my wife will be saying really useful things like ” I never loose my keys”

… shortly before you deduce that her keys are, in fact, your keys which she picked up by mistake after losing her own set.

(also, “lose” not “loose”.)

My wife’s are far nicer and don’t have any stains at the rear !

I suppose you want one of us to wipe your arse for you, now… 😆

I am such a loser/looser

Thanks for the correction… Do you know where my keys are by chance ?

I am such a looser

It may explain the unwanted stains.

Just blame your wife. Mine “moves” my stuff, buries it under her work and worst of all “tidies up”. She’s buried, moved and tidied up my keys, wallet, guitar picks (the most irritating one as everything in the house is wood and I use Fender medium picks), etc. so often that now I just have to say “have you seen my … .” and she’s rummaging through my pockets, under her work, the places she tidies stuff … in the hope of finding them before I do.

Edit: inside the vacuum cleaner? always the first place to look for anything that will fit up the hose.

2 places I “hide” mine, rear small zip pocket of my Winter riding Jersey and left front pocket of my jeans 😆

I lost my keys the other day, I found them in my hat.

Are they in your hat?

Another thing to consider is quite often when I lose things in the house, it’s because my wife has tidied them away.

Often this is resolved by asking her.

Have you checked on top of your head ? Thats where i find my glasses when i lose them ……

Often this is resolved by asking her.

Nah, would rather spend the evening looking for the keys 😉

down between the sofa cushions is my bet.

With my bank card which is also lost. 8 days before Christmas. With a 5-10 working day turnaround for a new one.