If anyone is struggling- Please speak out

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If anyone is struggling- Please speak out

132 posts & 70 voices | Started 1 year ago by hora | Latest reply from kaesae

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hora - Member

I obviously dont want to post this on the Jahwomble sticky however if anyone is struggling, needs anyone to talk to there are many many people on here who would listen. My email is in my profile and in person I am non-judgemental. FFS I stand within Binners passive-smoking radius for a start!

I know no one can say 'buck up, cheer up mate' as those dark places are totally-uncomprehendable unless you've been there yourself.

Even if its acquiring a new login from STW and posting anon?

Email is always in my profile and I mobile can be available. I don't know if this will help.

On a much lesser note I posted up recently about my house and STW helped

Posted 1 year ago #
MrSmith - Member

Hora filling the gaping hole left in the agony aunt world by the demise of Claire Rayner?

your intentions are admirable but like plumbing and the electrics, always seek professional advice.

http://www.samaritans.org/

Posted 1 year ago #
hora - Member

Samaritans, if you had a creeping alcohol issue would you call the AA until it was too late? (Thats more a question I'm posing than a statement/reply)

Posted 1 year ago #
The Southern Yeti - Member

I'm stuck in a box!

Posted 1 year ago #
WorldClassAccident - Member

I have used STW during a few 'dark times' and it is a good half way house between talking to no-one and talking to someone who knows what they are talking about.

Probably not much use when the pills are poured in a pile in front of you but might just pull you back from pouring out the pills to begin with.

Be aware of the unforeseen consequences though, I have ended up as friends with people like Fred/Rudeboy through this approach. I sometimes wonder if the pills were a better option

Posted 1 year ago #
IanMunro - Member

That's a really touching post hora. Good on ya.

Posted 1 year ago #
loddrik - Member

I am in South London for a couple of days, can't get any more depressing than that!

Posted 1 year ago #
The Southern Yeti - Member

More seriously I do think this is commendable.

Posted 1 year ago #
catflees - Member

Thankyou Hora for posting this.

Posted 1 year ago #
mrsflash - Member

Thanks hora, good idea. I have had so much support from here when low, it would be great to be able to give some back.

Posted 1 year ago #
mamadirt - Member

if anyone is struggling, needs anyone to talk to there are many many people on here who would listen

Too right. C'mon folks, professional advice fair enough but I reckon sometimes it's just good to know that there is someone out there who understands . . . just listen . . .

Good on ya Hora!

Posted 1 year ago #
Mulletus Maximus - Member

A lot of people on here can be argumentative arses, but when people have posted for help or advise on a more serious issue then these people and others have shown what kind, helpful and compassionate individuals they are.
Maybe the help and personal experience of certain situations posted on here could spur people on to seek professional help? If so then that can't be a bad thing.

Posted 1 year ago #
roper - Member

There have been a few suggestions on Jahwomble's thread about donations.
I'm not sure what his family and friends think about it, or the rest of you, but I would like to donate to an organisation or charity which offers support to all sufferers of depression and mental illness or suicide victims. This includes support for family and friends as well as the person with the condition or problem.

If other people would rather do their own thing, that's fine, but if we are doing something "collective" maybe we could decide what the best thing is, or the best place for a donation to go? Going forward with a positive aim and all that.

What do other STWs think?

Posted 1 year ago #
monksie - Member

I was going to type something trite and thought better of it with rememberance of Jahwomble and his family but what I would like to add is: It's a very nice gesture but be careful, the road to hell is paved with the best of intentions.
(aimed at the original sentiment of this thread, not anybody inparticular)

Posted 1 year ago #
The Southern Yeti - Member

Charity ride?

Posted 1 year ago #
deadlydarcy - Member

Today, on this day, the twenty eighth of October, in the year of our Lord two thousand and ten. I stand here...TOUCHED BY HORA.

I feel moist inside.

Nah, fair dues mate.

What WCA said too. Sometimes, one can see that STW is a place where someone who might struggle to talk face to face in the first place, can get things off his or her chest. STW is nothing but supportive when people genuinely need it.

Posted 1 year ago #
Jamie - Member

TOUCHED BY HORA.

I feel moist inside.

Now normally I would insert something very rude.....

Not today though. Kudos Hora.

Posted 1 year ago #
BruceWee - Member

Good idea, hora. I would say that often it is enough just to talk things out.

However, if you find that you're are often depressed when there is nothing particularly bad going on in you're life or if you find yourself starting to think how nice it would be to be free from the responsibility of living then I would seek professional help as soon as possible.

Posted 1 year ago #
elaine anne - Member

mr smith : samaritains are a help yes... but sometimes some people feel they cant ring them either for help.... if you realy trust a friend then do ask for help in those darkest moments.... it happened to me on another forum and the way i came across to a certain person...they imediately knew how i was feeling so many helpful chats later helped me see the world in a different light from the once darkness that i knew...
so yeah friendscan be very helpful in times of need.... if you feel you cant talk to the professionals...

Posted 1 year ago #
hora - Member

TOTALLY agree. I mean the start. If there is anything anyone you can just bang out your frustrations to and get another opinion/thought. To put something potentially into perspective. I've been soo stressed over something that I've blown it out of proportion and its then knocked onto something else.

Posted 1 year ago #
richteabiscuit - Member

On a personal note this is why I like STW. I re-found this place about 6 months ago when my marriage fell apart and although I've always been a bit of a lurker and haven't posted a great deal you've all kept me company during my meal for one, this starting over is a tough gig.
Cheers Hora.

Posted 1 year ago #
DezB - Member

Does this mean speaking out on STW will no longer involve a lot of piss taking?

Posted 1 year ago #
Pook - Member

Nice one Mark - this place is very supportive once you can see past the p-taking and ribbing.
I've made some good friends through here, and had a lot of advice from some genuinely charitable people. I've also met Hora*

*who is incidentally hosting a group support session* this evening in Manchester.

*STW drinks

Posted 1 year ago #
hora - Member

I'm not hosting it! I'm only going to be there!! Too much pressure 'why this pub'? 'The route to this pub is shit' 'Why stop here'?

Posted 1 year ago #
gravitysucks - Member

Goon on ya Hora. Sometimes this place gives me the impression that there are lot of muppets on here. Things like this remind you its all just banter at the end of the day and were all just on big happy family!

On the collection front Does anyone know the famiies situation? A few people mentioned he had a young family. The charity route is a realy good option but to be honest if they are struggling financially a pot of money could take away some very unwanted pressure at this time. I mean the siuation is horrific but the prospect of not being able to pay a mortgage or realising Xmas is only 8 weeks away is a pressure they clearly don't need at the moment. Supporting charities is someones name is a good thing but direct support for there family might be even more helpful.

Posted 1 year ago #
Ho hum - Member

A very admirable post hora

Thank you for taking the time to write it.

Posted 1 year ago #
Pook - Member

I'm not hosting it! I'm only going to be there!! Too much pressure 'why this pub'? 'The route to this pub is shit' 'Why stop here'?

you forgot "you cut me out of the video when i did a boom gnarly trip to the bar for scampi fries"

Posted 1 year ago #
DrRSwank - Member

Hmmmm,

Whilst well intentioned I would also urge caution. Talking to mates is good - it can help.

But if people are feeling very negative then it is more professional help that is needed.

A friend recently took their own life and, in hindsight, perhaps it was possible to piece together enough bits of information to see the build up. But hindsight is wonderful, and, in honesty, there was no way anyone could have seen where this was heading.

A professional might have.

It is admirable what you have done Hora. But if you (the collective you) ever feel that someone may be heading too far into darkness do try and engage proper help.

Posted 1 year ago #
stumpynya12 - Member

Hora..... Good on you for an honest op. Like others comment, this is a good place and it does help to level your head sometimes on here. Helmet opinions anybody.......

Posted 1 year ago #
soobalias - Member

whoa, scampi fries!

you could av let me know.

Posted 1 year ago #
iDave - Member

read the OCD thread again, then consider if this is the place to ask for help.....

Posted 1 year ago #
hora - Member

Off-forum though. Onforum you temper what you say (personalwise) as you don't want any other 'STW'er to think your online 'character' is anything but better than the others?

Posted 1 year ago #
iDave - Member

is offering to help people off-line not suggesting that you're better than the others?

i get the sentiment of the OP, and it's admirable and i'm sure genuine, but I know from personal experience that the Black Dog can't be trained with a pat on the head and a well meaning biscuit

Posted 1 year ago #
hora - Member

Its a minefield but one can be put off by posting on a public forum. An admission of 'weakness'? Which it shouldn't be.

Posted 1 year ago #
Surf-Mat - Member

Amazing what people can discuss on here and good when STW contact turns into "real life" meets/purchases/whatever.

Despite the pi55 ripping, there are some good folk on here.

I imagine we've all had some unique experiences, some pretty dreadful, that can be used to try and others help on various subjects (ahem - not just cars...;-) ) outside just "what tyres to buy" and "what helmet for 5xxx extreme death riding."

Posted 1 year ago #