Productivity has hit an all time low in the office.

anyone want their star-sign reading?

go on then
why don’t you sneak out for a ride 😀

no bike, office manager sits opposite, he might notice LOL, although he’s just as bored as me.

He thinks his wife’s cheating on him BTW, bit sad 🙁

No bike! stop it you’re scaring me 🙁

Have an affair with him to cheer you both up?

Go on then, Sagittarius.

Go on then emsz, I’m bored senseless. Have been sat in the same seat unable to move since Monday.

Cancer.

Hmmm don’t think so ROb, he’s not my type.

mmb, bikes doing roadie duties atm, plus work is bus and train ride away.

Do you fancy a game of paper/scissor/stone?

bikebouy

Busy doing nothing, working the whole day through, trying to find lots of things not to do…’ That’s one of my favourite lines, from one of my favourite songs. Not that I’m trying to suggest that you will spend your weekend ‘busy doing nothing’. You’ve got so much on your plate. That’s why it’s important to make sure that your energy and time is well invested. Do something in too much of a rush and you may end up needing to do it twice. Remember too, that some things don’t need to happen as urgently as you imagine they do.

Yeti

We’ve been discussing reincarnation lately. Some astrologers believe in it. Others don’t. I have an issue with it. It may happen, it may not. But if the idea of it influences me to settle for second-best because one day, in some other world, things may be different, then it is doing me a disservice. Likewise, if I decide that things are going wrong because I am being punished for a deed in my past life that I can now neither remember nor atone for. This weekend brings you an opportunity. Don’t question it, don’t postpone it, seize it.

Go on then emsz, I’m bored senseless. Have been sat in the same seat unable to move since Monday.

Cancer.

Read that and thought you were dying 😯

Capricorn

Good news please, emsz! If I’m going to have another week of sh*t just paraphrase the good bits, would you?

* crosses fingers *

yeti,

how do we do that on a forum 😆

I am, but slowly and hopefully not for 50 years or so.

Easy really emsz. Think of something. Be honest.

I’m going for paper ❓

Camo

We all love a good satnav story. We have all heard about someone who ended up driving into a ditch or down a blind alley because the little voice on the dashboard told them to do it. Most of us also know people who switch on their devices, even when they are just going to the local store. They like to test its judgement. But for all the trouble they can be, that’s not so when you are lost, when it is dark, when you are far from home. Consider yourself entitled to take advantage of the easy option this weekend.

Paper!

and Leo as well please

Sweet – I think!

Ta!

i’m saggitarius too so thanks!

lapsteel – that’s a draw. Are you ready for round 2?

Drac

The classic comedy example involves a table with a wobbly leg. In an attempt to make it stand evenly on the floor, you saw off a little bit from the other three legs. Unfortunately, you don’t get the measurements quite right. Now, one of the other legs is short. So you have to start all over again. The same thing happens. Until eventually, your table is only inches above the floor and it is still wobbling! That’s what can happen when you set out to solve a problem. But it is not what has to happen to you this weekend. Just go carefully.

STW battleships would work, surely?

LapSteel – paper’s a good call. Amateurs at the sport always go for rock. 🙄

😀 you put lab not lap – now all I can think of is lab’s of steel.
As in “She was a hard woman she had…”

SHARK!!!!

i win!

Phil, I think you’ll find that ‘stone’ has Roy Scheider in it. Bad call, dude!

cheating!!!

who’s doing what at the weekend then?

Yeti, what exactly have you done to yourself?

I’m not going to the pub tonight for a change, me and sara gonna stay in, cooking mushroom lasagne and getting cosy on the sofa, probably just fall asleep LOL!

[video]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8gciFoEbOA8[/video]

point of order …boredom is no excuse for sloppy thinking

When the astrological signs were drawn up originally, it was done around 600BC. Each sign (e.g.: Scorpio) are exactly 30° wide – they are measured eastward along the ecliptic from the vernal equinox, which is the intersection of the elliptic and the celestial equator and is the zero point.
When the system was originally set up, the zero point was in Aries and was called the “first point of Aries”.

Aries encompassed the first 30° of the ecliptic, next came Taurus (30° to 60°), Gemini (60° to 90°) and so on…

This scheme ignored the actual stars themselves, but uniformity was more important than fussing about star positions.

Since then, precession has caused the celestial equator to wobble so as to cause the intersection point between it and the ecliptic to move westward along the ecliptic by 36° or a tenth of the way around.

Your birth sign ignores the effect of precession. What a horoscope calls “Aries” is the 30° segment along the ecliptic that is east of the current location of the vernal equinox – but today, most of it is in Pisces. The next 30° segment (called Taurus in the horoscope) is mostly in Aries. The astrological signs are directions in space that no longer correspond to the constellations that bear their names.

Precession causes the position of the sun on the vernal equinox to move as the earth wobbles on its axis – then again, the position of the sun varies on every date (analemma). This means that it is not only the names of the zodiac signs that are now wrong, the names of the tropics are also inaccurate!

This all dates to when the sun is within the constellation of your birth sign. According to astrology (corrected for precession – although these dates will vary slightly from year to year), you may find that you’re actually a different birth sign.

If you were born between November 30th and December 17th, you’re actually an Ophiuchus.

What happens in astrology is that the sun travels through the traditional 12 signs of the zodiac over the course of the year. Whatever sign the sun is in when you’re born is the sign you “are”. However, over the past 2,600 years (since the charts were drawn up), the precession of the earth has shifted the ecliptic westwards and now the sun visits the constellation of Ophiuchus during November/December. I very much doubt you’ll find a horoscope that takes this into account.
It is not even an accurate reflection of the actual stars/constellations
HTH
What you really need is something powerful and real
Chinese horoscopes
yours,
the rooster..imagine that apparently I am cock who would have thunk it.

Anyone else wondered why you never see esselgruntfuttock and Robert Shaw in the same room at the same time? Hmmm…

I’m so bored I’m considering getting premier membership to this here forum! 😐

I’m more bored.

I’m so bored I’ve needed a wee since before lunch, I can’t be bothered to walk to the loo, I’m either going to pop or wet myself.

Phil, that hand-puppet-shark has a distinct look of Basil Brush about it.

Or maybe I need to get to Specsavers

I’m so bored I’ve needed a wee since before lunch, I can’t be bothered to walk to the loo, I’m either going to pop or wet myself.

Emsz, I’ve been on a conference call with a bunch of absolute arses for an hour, and I’m (a) bored senseless (b) dying to go to the loo.

Could you just nip there for me, save me the bother?

Ta

emsz, yo may be bored, but no where near as bored as Junkyard, or me now i’ve read all that!

I’m so bored that I’ve strapped a spoon to the bruising on my thigh to see if I can get an imprint.

ohhh nickf posh….!!!

what do you do that needs conference calls?? that’s like a film or something!! *is impressed*

Didn’t read the junkyard stuff, don’t care, Horoscopes are just a bit of fun.

emsz, be prepared to have a small knicker explosion… i also partake in the occasional conference call. 8)

NickF – what’s the number? I could make it more interesting and I might even be able to add something constructive.

ohhh nickf posh….!!!

what do you do that needs conference calls?? that’s like a film or something!! *is impressed*

That’s so funny it almost hurts. Anyone who knows me will attest to the fact that ‘posh’ isn’t a word you’d ever use to describe me.

I’m an accountant, of sorts. Not even remotely glam, I regret to say.