….near to family

What would you do?

Depends. How long? How far? How difficult? How old? How much? How does it fit into your plan?

Family first for me, lesson leant about spending too much time at work. I wouldnt choose to be away from my wife. Ever.

So I'm not sure I would describe my job as a dream job but it is 250 miles from home. For me it works quite well because I work from home one day a week so I think I see my family just as much as if I was in the office near home all week.

Whether it will work for you really depends on loads of things but mainly how your kids/wife will cope without you being there. For us I think my wife quite likes the few days when I am away.

It may be a dream job but don't underestimate how expensive it will be to work away from home. It is not ideal but if the job is significantly better and your family are all on board with it then it can work.

Take job, move family.

no one dies wishing they spent more time in the office but if it is your dream job can family nor relocate?
Surely family is more important to everyone?

What do you mean by family?

Mum and Dad? Siblings?

Or

Wife and children?

Couldn't be far away from my wife and children for too long.

age dependant – im working on the west coast of africa atm – not through choice but at age 24 i dont have kids but i do have an understanding girlfriend.

gives me the opportunity to see sights in places id never dream of going to on holiday !

i dont want to be doing this in 10 years time though.

certainly wouldnt be doing it if i had kids

I'm working as a volunteer in Ethiopia, and I would say its the best job I've ever had. Easily has the most job satisfaction that I have ever known!

It is tough being away from friends and family, but I'm single so its slightly different…

I've spent the majority of the past 6 years abroad away from the missus, frequently not seeing her or any friends from back home for 5 months at a time.

Wouldn't describe it as a dream job, but the house deposit is starting to look reasonably healthy, and the plan is to move back to the UK on a permanent basis next year.

Have to strike a good balance between job satisfaction, quality time with family, and remuneration, not always easy!

Cheers, Rich

Going through a similar dilema at the moment. Good job / pay in India, but wife and son would be coming too. It means leaving all the rest of the family behind, plus friends etc. Would also have to leave our 2 dogs 🙁
Its a 3 year post, so not forever, and could lead to other bigger things.

Its a difficult decision….

when i got married i asked my grandad, aged 85 at the time, what the secret to his long marriage was. he scratched his head and thought for a moment, then answered "well…..after we got married i got a break for 4 years with the war (he ended it in a POW camp in Morocco) and then soon after worked away as an engineer for 3 years, so I'd say just try not to see too much of each other in the first ten years…"
At which point he puffed on his pipe and cracked up laughing!
The main thing is to agree what you're doing with everyone. And have a get out option if you realise you made a big mistake.
Chris @CycleActive

career mistake, that is.

I'd not be away from my kids all week, not for any job in the world. But we moved for work miles away from our parents and siblings.

Okay, I'm 29, byt Family, I mean parents and siblings (both mine and my wife's) and by distance I mean 300 miles away.

My wife would move with me for some of the first year, but then who knows.

do it then

yep, do it.

As most have said – family needs to come first or you stand a good chance of regretting too much

Also – what do you mean by dream job? Something you love doing or simply good pay and conditions?
If it's the former, I'd be wary & think it through
I was in a similar situation 30 years ago when I was offered a job as a race mechanic for the factory Yamaha team, it would have meant moving to Holland but it was everything I loved
I turned it down in the end as I didn't want to lose my love of motorcycle racing.

I turned it down in the end as I didn't want to lose my love of motorcycle racing.

That seems quite perverse, I have always operated by the principles of

a) playing to my strengths
b) doing the things I love in the hope that someone will start to pay me to do them

That seems quite perverse,

I know it sounds odd on the face of it but I used to regularly see the guys who were doing that job, they never appeared particularly happy
I on the other hand was enjoying being an unpaid spanner for for an independent team & earning money elsewhere

If it's only 300 miles, your wife will move with you and it's a dream job you should do it. 300 miles is a pretty easy long weekend trip. My family and I did that for 10 years after uni before we moved back to Cornwall and it was great, but prepare yourself for llllllooonnnggg weekends with the parents it odd how they easily turn into 6 days of entertaining 🙂

300 miles… times that by 10 and you have yourself a problem. Take the dream job

Do you know it is a dream job, or do you just feel that it is what you dream of as being your dream job? My dream job is to win a couple mil on the Lottery and never have to work. I really can't imagine any job as being a dream.

But that is just me.

my newest friend has just moved his wife & 2 kids from living 10mins from Heathrow to D&G and so far loving it.
When my kids were at school I met loads of people who had relocated up here from South Wales, Leeds and various other Southern areas and cannot think of many, if any, who have regretted it. In those days they were making a mint when selling houses down South compared to prices up here, money in the bank etc 😆

On the other hand I nearly ended up moving to Edinburgh when my wife went chasing her "dream job" Turned very sour, she came home and got a better job which has turned out to be the dream job she had been looking for 😆

D&G ??

Dumfries and Galloway. Castle Douglas actually, the Food Town

Wouldn't lose any sleep at all, did it when I was 18 – and it was a 'job'.

Different if its 'real' family, but when the kids are real young they don't know any difference.

We still don't know what it is or why it's so dreamy. Need more info 🙂

Take the job, 300 miles isn't too far.

molgrips – Member
We still don't know what it is or why it's so dreamy. Need more info

I'm a graduate Aerospace Engineer:

Job 1 – (close to home) is in nuclear submarine design.
Job 2 – (the dream) is working in cutting edge aerospace with links to the top brass of the company.

If Job2 was in the US or Europe would you still be considering it? If so, 300 miles is not too far.

What do you want to be doing in five years? Which job will get you closest to that?

Job 2 dave will get rid of job 1 next year anyway. And like someone else said, it's just a job, a means to do what you enjoy doing. Work to live not live to work laddie.

I never have been too career minded so I'm maybe not the best to comment

but if job2 is in the defence industry, it may be worth waiting until after the Autumn defence review – if you can
Trident will be safe though, so the nukes is a good long term propect

Dream job, no children, moving away from parents and siblings – do it.

If it was moving away from wife and kids it needs more consideration but you can see your parents a siblings at weekends easily.

300 miles isn't moving away!!!
There's no water between the locations 🙂

I guess if you plan on making babies any time soon you could miss the family support (grateful & FOC childcare service)

but when the kids are real young they don't know any difference.

This is rubbish. I started working away and living away during the week when my son was 8 months old. Come saturday morning, which was the first time I would see him, he ran away from me because he didn't know who I was.

It was heart breaking.

As he grew older, he could remember me, but it was pretty clear on the one full day I was at home that I was only a bit-part player in home life and that was completely shit.

However, in this case, take the dream job unless you're spectacularly attached to the area in which you live.

Definitely Job2 – the dream one. 300 miles is nothing when it's not your kids and your wife can come with. You've got to fly the nest at some point 🙂

Plus, if you move, you can live somewhere really near work and walk or cycle instead of having a longer commute.

The childcare thing – you get by.

The childcare thing – you get by.

This is very true _ I am just jealous sometimes of those who have the option. 🙂

Thanks for all e advice fellas, it’s been a long process, but I start the dream job ( I hope that’s what it is) on March 14th.

I’m off down to Bristol/Bath for only the second time in my life next week. :-s

That seems quite perverse, I have always operated by the principles of
a) playing to my strengths
b) doing the things I love in the hope that someone will start to pay me to do them

I started MTBing again after my previous main hobby turned into a job – a job that I certainly enjoy but it’s no longer the relaxing fun it used to be – so I needed a new way to have fun and chill out…