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Bells are rubbish

82 posts & 31 voices | Started 7 months ago by RealMan | Latest reply from juan

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RealMan is honking

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RealMan - Member

Seriously though, they are. They look rubbish, they sound stupid, nobody pays any attention to them, and they're pretty expensive.

However, riding through a busy city high street where people constantly walk out across the road without looking at all, it does get a bit tiring shouting at people constantly, as I'm sure most of you will know.

So instead, I give you the RealBell™ (and a nice little slam).

It gets the job done. Tested it in Exeter high street today at around 2pm, and it was very busy, and it does work, very well. It is proper loud. I had a lot of fun today

Cost: about £3 off ebay, plus two cable ties and a bit of electrical tape.

Posted 7 months ago #
djglover - Member

Does the air horn signify bell end?

Posted 7 months ago #
RealMan - Member

I wondered how long it would take for a bell end joke to pop up, you could've at least made it a good one..

Posted 7 months ago #
Elfinsafety - Member

If you let that thing off behind me, you'd end up in the canal, wearing it as a suppository...

No need to be a dick. Bells are small, light, unobtrusive and polite.

Give us that Garmin Edge mount. I need it.

Posted 7 months ago #
RealMan - Member

If you let that thing off behind me, you'd end up in the canal, wearing it as a suppository...

I fear the people today I encountered had similar feelings, but I am sick of people walking across a road without looking. It's for everyones safety really.

And no, its my mount, and I need it more then you

Posted 7 months ago #
Elfinsafety - Member

No you don't give it to me!

Mate, I live in That London and get along fine with just a little ping bell. Exerter's a little quiet sleepy village by comparison. You don't need something stupid like that. Just chill, relax, and accept some peds are dozy buggers.

You've only got that horn to show off. Don't. Grow up a bit, and then you will see you don't need a Compensatory Device.

I'll just take that Garmin Edge mount off you anyway.

And let yer tyres down.

Posted 7 months ago #
RealMan - Member

People in London know about the invention of cars though, and are aware that if they walk into the path of one it may hurt. People down here aren't that aware. The high street is an absolute nightmare at times.

Why do you need a garmin anyway, what's wrong with a map?

Posted 7 months ago #
SaxonRider - Member

So far, I'm giving this discussion two thumbs up.

Posted 7 months ago #
brakes - Member

you need to accept that your honking is futile and you won't change their behaviour unless you mow them down. unfortunately that's not an option - I prefer the 'near-miss' approach whereby you buzz infront of them, inches from them, millimetres away, and just say hello.
shits em right up

Posted 7 months ago #
RealMan - Member

I prefer the 'near-miss' approach whereby you buzz infront of them, inches from them, millimetres away, and just ~~say hello~~ honk the **** out of them.

FTFY.

Also when we're in a big group I can just honk every 20m or so, and then it makes sure we don't have any incidents.

Posted 7 months ago #
Elfinsafety - Member

Yeah, but really and truly, it's just about your ego really, in't it? S'all about you saying 'yeah look at me, I'm a Real Man'.

When you do actually become a real man, you will discover that excessive artificial horns aren't actually something that works well in your favour, and in fact will only make you look more inadequate if you persist in relying on them.

Posted 7 months ago #
brakes - Member

there's a guy who I see on my commute and he has one of those air zound things, he actively seeks out people to PARP at - peds, cars, other cyclists, dogs, lamp posts.
everyone thinks he's a tool.

When you do actually become a real man

the sun may have burned out by then

Posted 7 months ago #
RealMan - Member

Envy makes a man bitter doesn't it?

I could dig out the link so you can buy one of your own if you really want

Posted 7 months ago #
Elfinsafety - Member

Listen son; I had the horn before you were born...

the sun may have burned out by then

What, become cold and dark and shrunk in on itself?

Posted 7 months ago #
RealMan - Member

I'm guessing it's all out of puff by now then?

Posted 7 months ago #
jambon - Member

Used to have one of those air horns that you could refill with a track pump and the air reservoir was mounted in the bottle cage. That was when I lived in London - wouldn't dream of using it on a pedestrian - they'd just freeze dangerously, much better to do the faux near miss to try to teach them that the next time it could be something a whole lot heavier and harder and WOULD hit them. Don't know why I bothered as the motorists didn't care if I honked or not. Bleedin' loud though. Good fun on Critical Masses though! They still going?

Posted 7 months ago #
DezB - Member

I can see the use for one of those for letting cars know you're there.. Not pedestrian s though. I'm sure Realman is entertaining himself though.

Posted 7 months ago #
Elfinsafety - Member

I'm having a fry-up don't really care what you think.

Posted 7 months ago #
Stevo210 - Member

You call that a horn..........
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5SRgwKW0sts

Posted 7 months ago #
DezB - Member

I sometimes get 20-30 kids, walking and on bikes on the bit of my commute in this video. I just smile and weave my way through them, these days. An air-horn? Maybe when i was 12..

www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Rj6gBnSCEU

Posted 7 months ago #
cinnamon_girl - Member

Why not use the road Dez? Cycle lanes aren't compulsory!

~~Who wants abuse from gobby kids anyway~~

Posted 7 months ago #
RealMan - Member

I sometimes get 20-30 kids, walking and on bikes on the bit of my commute in this video. I just smile and weave my way through them, these days. An air-horn? Maybe when i was 12..

That's interesting, when I was 12 or so, I used to be one of those kids going to that very school, and rode there every day on my bike.

I used the road..

Posted 7 months ago #
DezB - Member

That bit of cycle lane is on the right side of a big roundabout. In rush hour traffic, its far safer and quicker, to take on the kids than do a big 4 junction (including traffic lights) right turn on the roundabout. The kids aren't gobby, just dozy.

[edit]name of the school Realman?

Posted 7 months ago #
RealMan - Member

Depends where you're coming from I'd say. If you're coming from the little residential area the other side of the golf course, possibly would be a bit quicker. If you're coming from further up it would make much more sense to just take the main road to the roundabout then go round it like a normal vehicle, rather then weave through school kids, against the current as well.

name of the school Realman?

Are you being serious?

Posted 7 months ago #
DezB - Member

I'm coming from waterlooville and going to Whiteley. Down Cams and up Wallington. After 8 years of going the Gosport way on the dual carriageway, its quite nice to be able to avoid the traffic and use that bike lane.

Posted 7 months ago #
RealMan - Member

What, going through Funtley?

I admit the road after the fly over to the train station roundabout is a horrible surface, and I would not really want to ride it every day (least not on a road bike), but still, it's got to be the fastest, easiest way. If you really wanted to avoid that, you could just go up wallington way, up past sainsburies, then off up turnpike and kiln road into funtley, but there's so many schools there, I imagine the traffic would be awful.

There's actually quite a neat off road route from fareham to funtley that is kinda fun.

I'd actually be tempted to try lanes, sort of a southwick, wickham, knowle route. Doesn't look like it would be that much longer, and probably a bit quieter. And avoiding the ****holes that are fareham and portchester is always a massive plus.

Yeah, if you cut up to worlds end, skirt denmead, and avoid southwick, you can actually shorten your commute. Pretty long commute whatever you do though.

Posted 7 months ago #
Elfinsafety - Member

Nice bit of music there Dez! One of me favouritist choons dem, innit?

And if you think about it carefully, it's very apt considering the nature of this thread....

Posted 7 months ago #
Earl - Member

I just shout 'ding ding!'

They get out of the way because they think I'm a **** and its saves me 50g.

Posted 7 months ago #
el_boufador - Member

In the mid 90's when I was about 15 my mate had something called an 'Air Zound' which was essentially an air horn coupled to an aluminium pressure vessel which you filled with compressed air and put in your drinks holder. It was very loud.

We used to go to the petrol station and fill it up as far as it would go, then we'd go riding through the pedestrianised bits of the town centre, silently waft up behind some poor old dear carrying bags of shopping and let it rip. They used to jump about 2 feet in the air and if you were lucky drop their shopping too. It was hillarious.

Dear God if you exist please don't send me to hell.

Posted 7 months ago #
yunki - Member

I've been thinking about this..

Exeter High Street is a chuffing huge expanse of semi-pedestrianised tarmac..
about 4 lanes wide.. closed to all traffic except buses.. (are cyclists even meant to be there..?)
At best you can knock maybe 3 minutes maximum off any concievable journey time by using the high street.. going round the back past the library instead will only take you 30 seconds longer..

The only cyclists that I've ever seen that are dumb enough to insist on dodging the gazillion peds and umpteen buses are smackheads on stolen bikes..

You are Dom Joly's narrower profiled cousin and I claim my free quasi modo mask...

HELLO!!? ESMERELDA!!!!? I'VE GOT THE HORN!!

Posted 7 months ago #
Surrounded By Zulus - Member

I have an airzound. The other day this had the effect of making the woman I was overtaking go from the far left of the path to the far right of the path and collide with me. Thankfully my immense core stability meant that she was deflected a bit. Moral of the story is that sometimes no matter what you do you encounter people so dumb that there is nothing you can do to avoid crashing.

Posted 7 months ago #
RealMan - Member

Mostly true yunki, but we meet for rides on the high street, so on a day when I do ride, I do have to go on the high street like 4 times, riding several times a week, it gets pretty annoying.

Not just the high street either, queen street is just as bad, as are almost all the roads coming off the high street except new north road..

(are cyclists even meant to be there..?)

Pretty sure they're allowed, as there's a cycle specific junction from paris street into the high street.

Posted 7 months ago #
jruk - Member

Most peds in Exeter and elsewhere aren't looking out for bikes. In fact most of them don't know the difference between red and green lights. But an air horn isn't the way to go - 'excuse me' tends to work fine if delivered in the right voice and is likely to result in a slap.

Posted 7 months ago #
Junkyard - Member

wow now how did you get away with that so far
WTF is going on with that bar tape
You have let me down , you have let the rules down but most importantly you have let your self down

Valid options are:

Match the saddle to the bars and the tires to black; or
Match the bars to the color of the frame at the top of the head tube and the saddle to the color of the frame at the top of the seat tube and the tires to the color where they come closest to the frame; or
Match the saddle and the bars to the frame decals; or
Black, black, black

Amateur

Posted 7 months ago #
winterfold - Member

It's disgraceful that someone so ready to give out a lecture on the rules can make such a beginnerish mistake. And those pedals.

RealMan - pls sell your road bikes.

Posted 7 months ago #