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Maybe I don't need to write much more than the title question to get this thread going. I'm interested to hear from you, as mountain bikers or cyclists, what you feel makes a great café to visit. You can give 1 word answers or tell a story about a particular experience or even give an example of a particular café.
I'm particularly interested to hear what you think from a rider's point of view (but also a non-cyclist if you want) of visiting a café, the place doesn't have to be bike specific however.
I am asking because I live in a spot in Norway where riding is really on the up, this year especially has seen a huge influx in visitors for riding, trails are being built, facilities are being added and people know the place as an MTB destination. Thing is, we have nowhere for people to meet to start, pause or end a ride, there's no hub or info point, there's no hang out place and it seems we could do with one. So what does it need to be, from a rider's point of view?
Good coffee
Good variety of food including some reasonably priced basics, regulars don’t always want to spend a fortune
Home made cakes
Pints of tea, chip sarnies and preferably loads of passive aggressive notices all over the place.
A big sign on the door saying ' No coffee ****ers'.
A great cafe will have good coffee, good cake, good hit food, good bike parking in view, enthusiastic people running it, route advice and maybe a few basic spares to sell
Think Colp has it pretty much nailed, with the exception of speedy service and a choice of inside or outside seating.
The people running it mostly but also
Great coffee and cheaper coffee
Weird tea and normal 'just get me warm' tea
Homemade cakes
Assorted chocolate stuff
Energy bars for the trails and a selection of innertubes, split links, puncture repair kits and 20mm bolt thru axles
Keep it simple.
Fast service - all else fails if you can’t get this right.
Good tea and coffee - it doesn’t need to be any posh, artisan stuff, just not muck.
A small selection of both sweet and savoury products - don’t need loads, 3 or 4 of each to keep them fresh.
An outdoor tap to fill up water bottles.
Some quick takeaway stuff - cans of Coke, Mars Bars, that kind of thing.
Ideally outdoor seating that’s covered and has a heater but that’s not possible for many. A few benches is fine if not.
Reading that, there’s not a lot there but so many places fail on the basics
Mainly location but getting served quickly with no coffee arses causing a jam, having somewhere to sit, sweet and savoury food stuff, few spares is handy but not a deal breaker.
I like it when you are sit in table service and the custom is when you order, you pay. Get the cakes and coffee down ya, quick chat then outta there. When it gets busy and you are trying to catch the over burdened servers and there is a delay, it is a pita when all you want to do is get out sharpish.
Good coffee doesn't need to be pretentious, fresh scones none of your made the day before dry as Gandhi's flip flop, range of toasted sandwiches, fresh salad with a great dressing not the Basil Fawlty lettuce cucumber tomato Waldorf
Good staff you can rely on, seats easily wiped down and warm friendly atmosphere
I'd ensure you have some vegan and gluten free options. Sorry to be that guy 😀
One that's open past 4pm, they all seem to close early, not just winter hours. Fortunately there was one in Edzell open till 5 so I got a coffee to warm up after cycling Glen Esk today.

After a walk up Glen Clova on Saturday I went in to the Clova hotel at 3.55 and was told they had stopped serving coffee at 3.30
On Sunday I was in Kirriemuir and the only open cafe was closing up at 3pm though the owner did offer to do a takeaway.
To be honest, I'd not bother.
As above, the modern mountain biker is far removed from those who came before, those who would be grateful for a cup of something warm and a bit of cake or a baked potato. You'll have endless arguments with the coffee tosspots about the quality of your beans, the method of grinding, the temperature of the product, the Fairtradeness of the pottery, the sustainability of the wood used to make the tables, the traceability of the wheat used in the sandwiches, the organic standard of the dairy products, the free rangeness of the eggs, the vegan-ness of the vegetables, the amount and/or the crispiness of the bacon, and above all the price of everything and the attitude of the minimum wage staff.
I suggest fleecing the ingrates...
Soup. For warming cold bodies after rides.
Dog friendly
Somewhere I can keep an eye on the bikes
Hearty staples like beans on toast rather than poncy panini.
Home made cake
Decent hot chocolate
'crikey' Crikey.
ah Edzell, memories... Me and my mum came up from Northumberland and stayed in a campsite just near Edzell when we went to Robert Gordon uni open day (which I ended up going to) some years back. The autumn days up there are something special.
I want pretentious coffee and artisanal sourdough sandwiches. Why is it cool to like crap stuff? Maybe have a shed outside to serve muck to those who want it. I bet those people just bring their own brews and food anyway though.
poncy panini
What's poncy about a toasted sandwich? Have I wandered into the 1970s by mistake?
Somewhere to hang wet clothing. I heard that it can rain a bit in that old there Norway.
One that gives you an oatcake with your breakfast (it was my choice to have extra bacon instead of black pudding).
Yonderman at Wardlow Mires. More of a roadside cafe than a bikers tbh
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Like all the best places.
Busy enough to have a good buzz about but not too busy where you have to queue for half an hour to get a seat.
I've nothing against a panini but I do object to a decent portion of basic grub being removed from the menu and replaced with something half the size at the same price. I want fueling at times like that, not entertaining.
I admit I'm not the best person to comment; as a veteran of day trips to Glentress/Innerleithen from Manchester I'm very much a proponent of finish ride and **** off home ASAP. I was the same as a roadie; when the cafe stops happened, I'd go and do a loop to keep ticking over and get more miles in.
Like Robert/Phillipa Millar said I'll have cake and coffee after the ride...
Traditional cafes with cooked breakfasts and large mugs of tea are great.
Modern cafes with flat whites and gluten free everything are also great.
I just want a clean place that sells decent grub at a decent price.
I miss the cheesey beans on toast at the old Hub cafe at GT. And the HUGE chocolate flapjacks. Happy times.
Somewhere to hang wet clothing. I heard that it can rain a bit in that old there Norway.
Got that one covered ;). Used to live in pretty much the wettest place in Norway, got sick of that so only gone and moved myself to the 'warmest place in Norway'.
Great coffee and cheaper coffee
Weird tea and normal ‘just get me warm’ tea
Agree with this. Also a cup of tea should not be the same price as your expensive coffee.
From a riders pov soup and a roll in winter. Ice coffee in summer.
Somewhere to lock the bike.
Sheltered from the wind so you can slump outside. Good phone signal.
Nice view, ideally of the sea as there is usually something going on.
So that's basically Billy Winters in Portland Harbour.
Fast, value and filling.
Basically a refuelling spot and then off.
Fond memories of those flapjacks at Glentress! Grew up riding there as a teenager, still go back for a trip every time I'm in the UK. The area I live in now feels very Tweed Valley-esque, just 10yrs behind in development.
Track pump
Tool wall
Outide tap
Clean bogs with hot water not 30c tepid water
no smoking on the premise / terrace . sorry but you stink
usb ports a plenty
29 posts and so many boxes to tick
Tool wall
Don't even think about it. Everything on it will be lost / stolen / broken within a day and you'll have every ungrateful sod in the car park demanding to know why you haven't got the specific thingummy for their proprietary wotsit. Or you'll have some pillock who's decided, seeing as all the tools are there, to strip his headset down and who then loses all the bearings down a gap in the decking. Way WAY more trouble than it's worth!
How different is the cafe culture in Norway compared to the UK?
Also a cup of tea should not be the same price as your expensive coffee.
The majority of the cost isn’t in the tea bag, it’s in the rent, the wages, the infrastructure around it. The total difference in cost between coffee and tea is sod all.
If you actually want to make money:
Bought in cakes don't have enough margin
Same goes for any and all confectionary
Watch the pricing on cans etc, shop around and stock up on deals
Good margin:
Hot drinks
Home made tray bakes, then round cakes (carrot cake etc)
Scoop ice cream
Toasties & Panninis
I've just retired from the business after 15 years of a cafe at an FC forest, message me if you want any help.
Friendly staff. Fast service. Warm.
Everything else comes after.
Don't try to pack too many tables , nothing worse than yo canny get in your seat due to the big guy with his legs 45° taking up all the room
Ban Lochs and Glen buses as they hog the bog for the next while
Contactless payments, I only get cash for Xmas and birthdays and I'm over 40😁.
A hatch to buy from so you can hold your bike if on your own.
Water bowls for the dogs.
Toilets you can take your bike in.
Very very good coffee, that's made properly and not burned. You can have the best roast in the world but if the barista burns it with 100C water, you might as well drink instant coffee cat p*!
If riding:
-Somewhere to sit that is suitable for well over an hour of lounging with your mates. If we're all spending close to 10 quid each (coffee, loaded toastie), I think that's reasonable and I wouldn't feel guilty
-Ideally substantial savoury option (eg toastie)
Agree with all of the above re: friendly, etc. A cafe where you build a relationship w/ staff>customer, will always be a winning formula for so many reasons!
It needs to be warm and dry. I used to go to a cafe that was popular with walkers and cyclists and most of the time it was chilly and the windows running with condensation. Then the owner fitted a woodburner and the transformation was amazing because of the forced ventilation caused by the stove, along with the warmth.
Oh and it needs rubber covers on the chair legs to stop them scraping on the floor.
Very very good coffee, that’s made properly and not burned. You can have the best roast in the world but if the barista burns it with 100C water, you might as well drink instant coffee cat p*!
There you go...
You've gone out to ride your bike, not go on a coffee tasting tour of the world!
Great food and coffee. Friendly staff. Plenty of bike racks. Plenty of seating, indoors and out. Ability to cope with groups of 10 cyclists arriving at a time.
You’ve gone out to ride your bike, not go on a coffee tasting tour of the world!
The two are not mutually exclusive?
No they're not, but as always here in STW land, dicks will be a dicking.
It's like when people talk about opening a bike shop and ask what people would want to see; the tosspots always want a coffee machine or a coffee bar with a 'barista'.
If it's a fancy coffee you're after, bugger off to a coffee shop; it's not like there's a lack of the bloody things.
Very very good coffee, that’s made properly and not burned. You can have the best roast in the world but if the barista burns it with 100C water, you might as well drink instant coffee cat p*!
Isn't this a myth?