[Closed] Excuse me! Watch your language!

It's not all that f@cking offensive

Hmm I can understand your position, I think it sounds bad, especially when I hear a recording of myself swearing. But I think there are some important points raised here.

1) Why is a swear word offensive? I think its just culture and conditioning it is only a word after all. If you hear a swear word in another language you that you do not not know or understand it has no effect.

2) I have always thought offence (as in the taking of) was the fault of the person taking offence rather than the offender, essentially you have a choice as to whether you are offended or not, ultimately its just a word and its actually arbitrary as to which words are offensive or not.

3) Freedom of speech.

If swearing is all that you have to worry about then you should be a happy man.

i swear much more than i used to and i'm nice

As a weegie I must confess that I naturally swear far, far too much. Always to emphasise a point, but often inappropriately given the company.

Sorry. 🙁

People have been talking like that for years... centuries even. I am not sure when some words became deemed as offensive, it was probably the Victorians 😉

I mean really what is the difference between the f word and shag or copulate or intercourse... if it is the act that is offensive to be mentioned then all the other words that could be chosen instead must also be offensive?

All part of the rich vocabulary that our forefathers left us.

Also why is c*n* deemed more offensive than ****?

And why can't anyone write these word on this website? Are they against freedom of speech?

Swearing probably is more common, but as long as people are aware that it isn't appropriate in certain contexts then it doesn't really matter does it, it's only a word.

Anyway, I was getting quite fed up with hearing the word **** and I did not want my 10 year old to constantly hear the f word, so I just turned around and asked him to watch his language.

He mumbled something and then stopped, no back chat or anything.

Funny that talking to someone in a reasonable manner worked, if you believe most people on here, doing that should have instantly got you stabbed.

Toys you miss the point... Words have meaning or why else use them? As to offensive or not it depends on two things
1. Whether someone swears at me or in front of me big difference.
2. Whether it is gratuitous .. then I went to the ****ing shop and then I got the ****ing paper. And this ****er said to me etc. I find that a bit pointless

At work I constantly challenge teenagers who swear as it does seem they cannot construct sentences without swearing a lot of them actually challenge that they swore and sometimes swear in this challenge as they don’t even realise they do it.
Not anti swearing as long as it fits the context ..it is annoying around your children though
EDIT: Grum I have been stabbed three times at work for balance...JOKE I have only twice been challenged and had the abuse escalate and both times it was by females. One tried to assault me by throwing her phone at me and then tried to sue us as it got broke on our premises when it hit the wall 🙄 The other eescalated to an assault but I restrained her when the police turned up and i released her she attacked me again and spat at me. She then claimed i hit her first and she was defending herself despit the enite incident being witnessed by about 20 peoplle and being captured on CCTV ..she git charged she still comes here she gives me the V's and calls me a bag head these days ...she has issues though.

Kids don't swear any more than we did when we were young. Their grammar and spelling is appalling though.
You probably just live in a lower class area than your parents did.

I find it odd that the things we are fondest of make the most offensive swear words.

If the words weren't designed to cause offense people wouldn't use them. It does seem to be habitual for some people though, which kind of defeats the point of using them.

But I don't especially want my kids thinking it's OK to swear so I'd prefer it if people kept it to their own homes or the pub rather than wandering around the supermarket.

I too wonder why some words are deemed offensive / more offensive than others, but they are and we're conditioned to that now.

As for swearing itself; personally I think a swear word being used to illustrate a point or get a point across is OK in the right place / company, but adults swearing routinely in normal conversation indicates lack of vocabulary to express themselves adequately. I would prefer that people don't swear in front of my children but I'm not under any illusion that they'll hear it soon enough. But that's mainly because I'd prefer they learn to express themselves fully without effing and blinding - then when a swear word is appropriate it still has an impact.

Kids / teenagers swearing - it's part of growing up, to push the boundaries of acceptability and again imho I'd do the same and ask them to stop until out of earshot of my two. But I wouldn't lecture strangers on what to do once they're out of earshot (like they'd listen!)

One of them was saying, "Whay don't you fing do that, blah, blah. Oh, for fs sake, blah, blah, f**ing that!".

They seem to be saying the word 'blah' a lot more then when I was younger.

Non sunt in coeli. quia gxddbov xxkxzt pg ifmk

Swearing is very much on the rise IMO. Largely due to the media making it more acceptable. I saw the F word used on a BBC advert at 6:30 last night, I had to rewind to double check I wasn't going nuts. The radio uses it fairly consistently with many words that when I was a kid you'd only hear on late night (11pm onwards) films being used at lunchtime on radio 1. I don't think its a reflection of society, I think it is leading society.

Kids / teenagers swearing - it's part of growing up, to push the boundaries of acceptability and again imho I'd do the same and ask them to stop until out of earshot of my two.

Yes, but the "acceptable" boundary now is "anything goes" to a lot of people. And if you disagree you're an old miserable git, rather than someone upholding a level of respect and decency. I have no problem with people swearing in extreme circumstances, to me that's exactly what it is there for. To use it in day to day life both dumbs down it's usefullness in extreme circumstances and makes daily life so much more unpleasant. Rightly or wrongly, listening to someone swearing like a trooper really does make you question their intelligence.

jon1973 - Member

One of them was saying, "Whay don't you fing do that, blah, blah. Oh, for fs sake, blah, blah, f**ing that!".

They seem to be saying the word 'blah' a lot more then when I was younger.

Capullo! 😉

Junkyard - Member

Toys you miss the point...

I disagree I think I understood the point clearly. I was merely trying to separate the logical from the emotional. As I said I do not like the sound of it, which is purely down to conditioning, an emotional response. Logically offence is arbitrary and down to the choice of the offendee. You and I choose whether a swearer offends us.

Swearing shows that you lack the eloquence to express yourself adequately.

That's what my Dad always said. Then I joined the Army and I have to physically stop myself using swearing as a comma.

I swear far too much but i certainly wouldn't want my children hearing it

Or anyone elses for that matter

I have always thought offence (as in the taking of) was the fault of the person taking offence rather than the offender

People have cursed/sworn for ever and a day.

The difference nowadays is that people tend not to moderate their behaviour in different social situations as they may have done before.

-blokes on the docks/in factories/in the pub would have been swearing a lot in our grandfathers' day, but done so much less when they went home to their families.

I've never been a habitual swearer. When I was heard swearing in the office, one of my younger colleagues actually commented on it
-Everybody else seems to swear constantly.

On sites, no sentence is complete without at least a couple of completely unnecessary ****s and ****ings, frequent t**ts and a few c**ts. The older (35yo+) blokes still apologise for this in the company of women, so I doubt that they do it as much at home.

Swearing can be a release and used in the right place, can have an effect.

Habitual swearing ceases to be 'swearing', it sounds coarse and may suggest ignorance or philistinism.

so f@ck off you stupid ignorant Nazi c0ck weasel - I mean I could suggest your wife or mother is a lady of the night, your daughter addicted to crack and a lady of the night and it would be up to you if I am insulting you or being abusive ... apparently it has nothing to do with me, the meaning of the words or my intentions . I disagree with this No the words are offensive as I have a dictionary and it tells me what they mean. Words are not [in the sense you mean] open to interpretation as hopefully my [tongue in cheek] abuse showed.
Genuinely no offence meant her ebut hopefully I proved my point

I think the problem here is that you are insulting someone, where you don't have to use offensive language, and not using offensive langauge. I agree that, at the correct time, in the correct place, it is the listener has a problem. There is an case that the relationship between speaker and listener will affect the level offence caused. I will accept a fellow Welshman caling me taff or gog but it is less acceptable from an Englishman.

When I worked in a city centre bar I would sometimes get complaints from parents regarding the level of bad langauge, to which the response was that the bar was really a city centre adult bar and that they really should either put up with the language or go to a pub designed for families. I knew the customers were, generally, well educated and would behave themselves in a family bar....

I 'muttered' bollocks in front of a group of walkers I didn't know were there the other day. It was just at that moment after I thought I'd cleaned a technical climb that I've been trying for years but failed on the relatively easy bit.

I did say 'pardon my french'.

😆

A few years ago I gave up swearing for about a week - and the weird thing is I felt a lot less stressed/angry during that time. But then then old habit kicked in again.

I think there's a connection between verbalising the expletive as a means of giving ones self a rush of emotion, whether it be negative (anger, stress, frustration or whatever) or positive (elation, etc). Therefore, if you're the type who likes to swear a lot because you're too ****in lazy to compose a more articulate sentence, then you're more likely to be raising your stress/anger levels, which becomes self-perpetuating in that you keep doing it because you're addicted to the whole thing/rush. Innit.

I think the reason that Esperanto failed to catch on is because the only swear word in the language is "sausages".

don if true then words would have no meaning if it is up tot he listner to decide what they mean surely the person saying it decides - I agree re it is sometime the listener but that distinction for me is being swown at or sworn in the presence..the words are offensive check the dictionary it will tell you they are both offensive and what they actually mean. I do get your point mind hpefully you get mine.

Now are you a Gog or a Taff it is important

Diolch

Ps Taff is river taff for South Wales Gog is Gogledd for North wales iirc.
Me Yr Alban [spell?]

I had a 'sweary' incident the other week whilst out with my kids (5 & 7yrs old).
Crossing a road junction in town where a bloke was stopped on the crossing and pouring out a whole tirade of foul abuse at the woman stopped in front of him. Poor woman was in tears.
Now i'm no old fart, i'm 35, he had a good 15-20 years on me, but it wasn't right.
I politely asked him if he would mind not swearing like that in front of my kids (and the others with them). Started walking away when he got out of his car and turned the volley of abuse on me, along with threats of 'i'll knock you out, you c*nt', 'i'll f**cking stab you' etc etc.

I kept quiet, ignoring the twunt, whilst doing my best to usher my rather upset kids away.

Number plate noted, police informed. I don't expect anything to come of it, so i'll leave that one for karma to sort out.

After listening to a talk by a language expert who made a very plausible correlation between the repeated use of the word f*ck and similar in normal conversation and a poor overall vocabulary word count I have tempered my language considerably! She was basically making the point that the use of such language was mainly due to a lack of alternatives available to the speaker due to poor education or exposure to literature and varied spoken word. Or to put it another way, those that have to swear repeatedly to make their point are usually a bit thick! 😀

After listening to a talk by a language expert who made a very plausible correlation between the repeated use of the word f*ck and similar in normal conversation and a poor overall vocabulary word count I have tempered my language considerably! She was basically making the point that the use of such language was mainly due to a lack of alternatives available to the speaker due to poor education or exposure to literature and varied spoken word. Or to put it another way, those that have to swear repeatedly to make their point are usually a bit thick!

I swear A LOT.

I work in publishing, my vocab is pretty extensive. I just happen to like swearing.

I work in publishing

Viz?

My cousin works in publishing and would I defy anyone who met her not to think she was a bit thick!

Well I might be lazy, but I'm fairly well read 🙂

Junkyard, Gog and proud!

I think we agree, but are looking at it from different angles. If you hear an offensive conversation which is not directed at you, then you as the listener make the choice to be offended or not.

don simon - Member

Junkyard, Gog and proud!

I think we agree, but are looking at it from different angles. If you hear an offensive conversation which is not directed at you, then you as the listener make the choice to be offended or not.

Shocker I think I'm in the same situ, I try not to be offended even when people insult me, I see it as their problem if they want to spread negative vibes man.

I don't hold with this "lack of vocabulary" argument. It's nonsense.

To paraphrase Billy Connolly, if you can give me a non-sweary equivalent to "f*ck off" I'll gladly use it. And it certainly isn't "go away."

That said, I agree, people swear too much, myself included. I think though there's a difference between swearing and inappropriate swearing. I'd be happy swearing like a navvy in front of my mates, but I wouldn't do it in front of my mother and I dispair when I hear people bellowing it to each other across the street.

I'd agree with the point Toys made too; broadly speaking, you choose to take offence, not cause it.

ah Toys the Buddha and the gift argument
If a person gives you a gift and you refuse to accept it then who does it belong too? Same if you dont accept the insults. I see what you mean in general with general swearing not really aimed at you ...I dont want my 5 year old asking me what f@ck means though when he heard it in a park though. Not when it is though,

Don ...Gog also from Uni days...if only you could get work there I would never have left

... reminds me of this:

http://marnanel.org/the-tripod-stand

cougar - we are talking about the words used in different contexts. Billy Connolly's "F*ck off" used as an expletive having no equivalent is one thing; it's the use of the same word in place of adjectives or adverbs or just as a pause mechanism that I am referring to.

I popped into our facilities dept earlier and overheard this choice sentence "You won't f*cking believe this but when f*cking Trevor took his whole f*cking family to the f*cking pub on Sunday his f*cking mother in law only f*cking asked him to take her f*cking home early so he missed the whole f*cking second f*cking half - silly f*cker".

The "Victorians" are right.

The whole purpose of refraining from swearing is that [i]it has real impact when you really need it[/i].

If you swear all the time it just becomes more lingual poly-filler.

A swear word used appropriately can help emphasis a point but to use it almost every other word shows a lack of intelligence..Example I went to a Roy "Chubby" Brown show once & he said **** every other word, now that was funny for about oh 5 minutes..but 45 minutes late I was bored out of my skull & so decided to **** off to the nearest bar!

ps I was on the ranges once with the Army & one of the blokes had a stoppage, when asked by the NCO what he was doing his reply was: "Sir the ****ing ****er is ****ing ****ed.." I & several others p1ssed ourselves with laughter..

That quote has also been attributed to John Emburey of Middlesex and England cricket fame, who upon being asked about the state of his just broken finger responded with the immortal 4 word sentence

'Facking facker's facking facked!'

I hope in your story the bloke was severely beasted for misaddressing the NCO. NCO's are called by rank. Sir is reserved for officers and WO1/WO2's, iirc.

The weird thing is, the words we use as swear words now, haven't always been that offensive.
Back in the mid-to-late Medieval period those words were in everyday usage as evidenced by the common street name of 'gropec*nt lane' meaning the place where the whores worked. They were crude yes, & not used in polite society (i.e the Gentry & above) but they weren't really shocking either.
If you wanted to REALLY offend back then you would use religious terms.
Terms like 'God's blood' 'Christ's bones' etc. This would make people stop, turn white & cross themselves in the st.
We still have the vestiges of this today - every time you shout "Jesus Christ!" you are harking back to a medieval swearing tradition 😆