Advice on not looking like a bellend?

I would appear to have failed the stw bellend test miserably; jeans, t shirts, short sleeved shirts, skate shoes, hoodies being my apparel of choice. I’m crushed 🙁

So, for all you budding Gok wans, what should be regarded as the epitome of sartorial elegance and coolness?

the trick is confidence and purpose, hoodie and skate shoes can work 😉

You can dress someone in the best suits and they will still look like a trapped ape. As for the number of people that reckon just wearing a dinner jacket makes you look like bond (in the dark, half squint after twelvety pints of Vodka Martini).

Simply nothing your mother would buy…

In avoiding bell-endery, I would sooner take stw advice than anything from Gok wan.

Oof didn’t read all of that thread, are jeans tshirts short sleeve shirts and skate shoes really the mark of a bellend?! That’s almost my entire wardrobe!!

Oof didn’t read all of that thread, are jeans tshirts short sleeve shirts and skate shoes really the mark of a bellend?! That’s almost my entire wardrobe!!

Me too! Assume a bell shaped form.

If this is true i’m definitley a bell-end! 😯 😆

apart from the short sleeved shirts…..

Buy a Ramones t shirt learn the name of 3 of their albumas and you may win some money off me 😉

I think when you get to a certain age you have to accept that in your face designer labels are a no-no. Way too many people seem to miss that one.

I am not sure if it was right to wear that clobber at any age! I am also fairly sure that when they were younger those people probably wore stuff from C&A.

Pigface, you describe my friend perfectly. He failed the test, despite all the names being written on said t-shirt.

I am 33 and a skateboarder.. Tight Jeans, skate shoes, T shirt. trucker cap, Tattoos…. I’m doomed.

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I think I’d rather take fashion tips from my mum than STW to be honest!

Basically read the full thread of what makes you a bellend, do the exact opposite of all the advice and you are sorted! Not sure that leaves much though with all the contradictions and I think all that is left is onesies, ski suits and wetsuits. At least you can wear them with pride knowing you are the height of fashion and defo not a bellend. Sorted.

I think when you get to a certain age you have to accept that in your face designer labels are a no-no. Way too many people seem to miss that one.

Damn, it’s worse than I thought. Should I chuck out all my zoo York t shirts 😕

Good advice JRTG but then you be stuck in a queue at Man at M&S or George at Asda.

😆

I am 33 and a skateboarder.. Tight Jeans, skate shoes, T shirt. trucker cap, Tattoos…. I’m doomed.

You are definitely a bad example, you should be wearing a helmet, it’s the law 😉 May I suggest a met parachute as a stylish choice.

You worry about what your clothes look like and you drive a Bongo?…

😆 (From from a fellow 40something Bongo driving, skate shoe/hoody wearing, bellend).

Panic buys

onesies, ski suits and wetsuits*

*from Amazon.co.uk of course

The ability to ride a bike amazingly good be it up hill, downhill or on the road and not be an arrogant twunt with it.

Asda sell jeans for 4 quid, get some of them.

Wear your bell-endery with pride brother. I do. Judging by the remarks on the other thread, I’m well into the swollen, bulbous variety. I don’t care. So there! 😀

I think I’d rather take fashion tips from my mum than STW to be honest!

Indeed, especially don’t take style advice from people who post about 200 times a day and answer first on every thread!

Anyone offering fashion advice should post a picture of themselves looking dapper so we can see their qualifications.

I’m the one on the left…

I once did post a photo of myself.

People’s “eyes where offended”

Best not to dig it up.

ianv – Member
I am 33 and a skateboarder.. Tight Jeans, skate shoes, T shirt. trucker cap, Tattoos…. I’m doomed.
You are definitely a bad example, you should be wearing a helmet, it’s the law May I suggest a met parachute as a stylish choice.

tea all over keyboard… nice one. 😉

You worry about what your clothes look like and you drive a Bongo?…

What??? Now you tell me Bongos aren’t cool either, I wish you had told me that when you sold it to me 🙁

Does the fact that its a Freda, and therefore a niche bongo, add any cool points at all ❓

It’s called a “Freda”

What do you reckon 🙂

It’s called a “Freda”

What do you reckon

You have a point there 🙂 Maybe I should have gone for a PANDA, like Khani

I wish you had told me that when you sold it to me

Are you blind?..
Now go and buy some folk music, join UKIP, and admit you’re doomed…

Now go and buy some folk music and admit you’re doomed…

Well it would certainly be better than the crap you left in the CD player 😆

Sartorial elegance you say…. You need tweed, or maybe a nice, subtle navy pinstripe. Brown brogues for the tweed, black Oxfords for the pinstripe.

I am comfortable in my bellendery.. It’s like an old pair of slippers… 😀

Avoid cycling clothes is my advice if you don’t want to look like a bellend.
In fact, avoid riding about on a bicycle.

Luckily I’ve long since accepted I am the least fashionable person on the planet and so can do both these things.

Embrace your bellend, as I embrace mine.

Otherwise, custom suit FTW (once you hit forty, which I assume you have, if you post on here).

Embrace your bellend, as I embrace mine

You’ll go blind…

Otherwise, custom suit FTW

Like this?? Not sure really, it would clash with my grey hair.

This is looking like a bellend: