Americanisms for me - especially in MTBing. We don't have fire roads in this country. A switchback goes up and down - it is not a series of hairpins.
In use all the time on here and just wrong.
The "Charlie Nicholas"
A grammatical solecism which may or may not be peculiar to Scottish football pundits is the omission of the letters "l" and "y" from the end of their limited repertoire of adverbs.
Some examples:
"Aye, the boy's played brilliant today."
"He's ran in there quick and boof! ball in the back of the net!"
In use all the time on here and just wrong.
Says who?
Totally stoked (Like a steam engine?)
Another frigging metaphor you thick sod.
don't really make me cross, but noticeable and much overused
words & phrases off of here:
hive-mind
darkside
boils my piss (although "... and when I piss, it stings .." always made me smile)
Politics (mostly):
refute (does not mean deny)
everyday life:
simples, bovvered - because theyre kack catch-phrases from the telly
(most other "bruv" type crap, I give the benefit of the doubt & assume it's tongue in cheek)
(oh, yeh - "off of". Admit it, you were already composing a reply)
Uni
Molgrips, I realise realtime has a technical basis and used in that context it's fine. What grates is the characters asking for real time update. My point being, when you're chasing terrorists, who's going to give you updates 30 minutes after the event? Everyone in that situation would know that you need the information as it happens.
"I need real time updates"
"really? Because I was just going to sit on the intel while I went to lunch. I thought 'one hour after' time would be good enough."
The collective that is the English speaking world will always keep an open mind to new words, phrases and uses thereof, and will chew on each if them for a few years. Most get spat out and disappear into obscurity. Some, however will remain to annoy pedants the world over.
I love splitting infinitives. I like to occasionally finish sentences with a preposition. All these things were frowned upon once. 🙂
Lush . Even typing it makes me mad!
Gorge' ( as in gorgeous not the geographical term)
And anything that's written or spoken in txt spk.
Molgrips - a fire road is a track built into the forest to allow fire engines to get in in case of forest fires - its something they have in north America and not here
We have forestry roads or estate roads or whatever. We don't have fire roads and a switchback is correct English usage for a road that goes up and down not hairpins. Google switchback road bearsden for an example
Check your dictionary or encyclopedia
ZL, u typd tht post rlly wl m8 🙂
Some of this is pretty silly - as dd pointed out the English language is constantly evolving and the concept of a single 'correct' language is a fairly recent one. Shakespeare for instance invented loads of new words and phrases - if only there had been internet forums around for people to whine about it at the time eh?
Innit.
I reckon "switchback" itself is a fairly "new" word and probably pissed any number of plank-up-the-back-of-their-shirts pedants at some stage.
Lighten up.
Glasgow Rangers
And or
Glasgow celtic...
Funny you should mention the bard grum...
The spelling we all insist upon is the one he never actually used. 🙂
The noise, for I shan't use the term word to describe it, "blogosphere" was used today during the news on Radio 4. I almost cried.
Fancy people coining words for that which has no word to describe it. 🙄
"I want you to give it 110%". I know it's not a word but the saying drives me mad. How can you give it more than 100%? Always saying it on shows like x-factor, "You've really got to up your game this time and give it 110%" boils my blood!
"I'm liking that" - what wrong with I like that ?
"Steed"
"Singletrack weapon" - its a bicycle ffs
'Tis or 'Twas - you are not a pirate
"Quiver" - unspeakable
Health and Safety.
Average speed check.
'Pulls up chair' is one used on here all the time that makes me want to cyber chib the ****er using it!
Dealdlydarcy, fair point. This lack of existing words is a real definitiongate.
words are good - we're all carried along on an unstoppable pandemocratic flood. You may nurture your petty prejudices, but almost no one is listening, and your objections will be swept away in the flux. Language changes by its nature, and we all get to take part in those changes by voting with our mouths :o)
TJ, out of curiosity I looked up switchback in the (only concise Oxford, mind) dictionary.
1st definition is a zig-zag railway or road to allow ascent or descent of a steep slope, followed by your alternating up & down road, then by roller-coasterish definition (the latter two are identified as typically non-american but still placed behind the "wrong" definition of zig-zags)
Molgrips - a fire road is a track built into the forest to allow fire engines to get in in case of forest fires - its something they have in north America and not here
I know that thanks.
What I meant was, who says these things are wrong? The best thing about English is that you can't be wrong. You can be grammatically incorrect, but you can make up words to your heart's content. The OED actually add new words based on the things people say, so they reflect us not the other way round.
Although grammatical rules are beginning to be adapted based on common usage.
Thankfully, there are and always have been plenty of creative and inventive people in the UK. Like Milton, for instance. And not everyone's like the miserable gits on this thread.
No one has mentioned:
MTFU & WTF.
Not words, but they great, m8. 😉
molgrips - MemberApp was in use many many years before iPhones came out.
Some right pathetic losers on this thread. Get a grip!
think you'll find that is "loosers" in our developing language
🙄
Scardey pants - mine has it the other way round.
A switchback railway is not quite the same thing as hairpins anyway IIRC - the train does not go round a curve at teh end of each zig zag but reverse and points are changed to allow it to go up the next inclined track - hence switch back
Molgrips the fire road is wrong simply because "fireroad" has a definition as above and it does not fit the forestry roads we have. Our forestry roads would be "logging roads" in americaneeze. Tehy are not there to allow fire engines in therefore thay are not fire roads
Another one I hate is prioritize. No such word.
Ti29er - MemberNo one has mentioned:
MTFU & WTF.
Not words, but they great, m8.
They "grate", or are great?
"The community is pulling together" or any other reference about a bunch of people in the event of some disaster, who barely know each other (if at all), but suddenly become referred to as a cohesive group .
Pretty much anything from this site:
[url= http://www.bullshitbingo.net/cards/buzzword/ ]Buzzword Bingo![/url]
You guys need to drink less coffee. A lot of the bullshit business phrases are funny really, whenever I hear some one using them in a serious way, it just makes me laugh. Lingustic tics are what makes this language what it is. The alternative is some worthy board of old men deciding what you can or can't say, like they have in France.
Language changes. Hooray
Another one I hate is prioritize. No such word.
Obviously there is such a word, as you managed to type it. Doesn't seem that bad a word, either.
Personal pet hate: "Work", as used by the STW journalists. For example, "This bike is great for singletrack work". It's not work, it's play.
Thankfully, there are and always have been plenty of creative and inventive people in the UK. Like Milton
Was he the guy who invented sterilising fluid? Hardly a massive claim to fame, I'd have thought you could come up with someone a little more significant than that. What about Alexander Graham Ball who invented pennycilin? Or that Hoover guy who came up with the Dyson?
"Staff" for people who work somewhere, which becomes even more tortured when reference is made to something that belongs to the people who work somewhere "staff's pay slips". "could all staff please keep staff's microwaves clean for other staffs" etc etc.
Jedward & Brangalina or any other allegedly famous couples who have their names shortened to one word.
'T'is' and 't'was' and other weird anachronisms don't do a lot for me, ditto 'steed' for bike, which is in the same vein when you think about it. 'Nom nom nom' as used incessantly on twitter which instantly marks out the poster as an infantile moron. And pretty much any word with more than three syllables used by Louis de Berniereres in his showy, faux Marquez drivel 😉
Any management bollox. Obviously.
Particularly at the minute: "It's in your gift" to sort out whatever!
People saying "brought" instead of "bought."
In relation to bike journalism I particularly hate the use of the word "hack". I've never been for a "hack" in my life!
Sponge: that was point of the mis-spelling!
Scaredypants: [i]"off of"[/i] - seriously, fundamentally, wrong!
Hack is a riding term, as in a cross country ride (on horseback).
And finally:
[i]"down to London"[/i] No. No. No.
It's always [i]"[b]up to London[/b]"[/i] (or any capital city for that matter) from wherever you are geographically in the country.
'Tis or 'Twas - you are not a pirate
Don't be so certain of that...
Louis de Berniereres in his showy, faux Marquez drivel
philistine.. at least de Bernieres isn't likely to bore anyone to death... unlike Marquez with HIS showy drivel..
It's always "up to London" (or any capital city for that matter) from wherever you are geographically in the country.
Ti29er - I had you pegged for a bit of a mentalist after you furiously insured me that kids don't take drugs as a right of passage... But THIS little gem proves that you are indeed a raging crack head..
TJ: A switchback railway is not quite the same thing as hairpins anyway IIRC - the train does not go round a curve at teh end of each zig zag but reverse and points are changed to allow it to go up the next inclined track - hence switch back
Yeah, it also has rails laid on it. I guess we'll have to take the "or road" part of the definition as closest to what we're discussing then ? 😉
"Public sector final salary pension"
Ooh, I really hate
[b]Ginormous[/b]. Seems to have become a word on kids tv these days. IT'S NOT A F%^&iING WORD!
Don't get me started on
[b]"somethink"[/b] and
[b]"nothink"[/b] (yeah no-think, that's about right) you thick bastards. My wife has been teaching kids so long shes started saying it. Grrr.
BTW [i]The Rolling Stones' "Get Off of My Cloud"[/i] it's OFFA.
Basis...
frequent basis
daily basis
routine basis
etc.
Complete bollox business speak. Instead why not try...
frequently
every day
routinely!
Or does that not sound corporate enough?
My personal teeth gritter is when youths say "aks" instead of "ask". watched a programme last night where inner city youths from a school were interviewed and this word was in almost every sentance.
a fire road is a track built into the forest to allow fire engines to get in in case of forest fires
Agreed it may be an Americanism, but I always thought that fireroads were breaks put in the forest to slow the spread of fire?
people that say pacific rather than specific - guy in my office does, seems to say it everyday - he also says 'its fluid' quite a lot which means he has no idea but doesn't want to admit it
Maybe yeti - if so there is still an English word - firebreaks - and we tend not to put roads in firebreaks
Hack is a riding term, as in a cross country ride (on horseback).
Yeah I know that. So WTF is it to do with bikes?
pamphlet. It's a leaflet.
I'm shocked to find this one hasn't been done yet...
[b]SOLUTION[/b]
There's a chiller cabinet in my local Tesco labelled "Indian Meal Solutions". FFS...
(No, they've not been liquidised and put in bottles, before you ask)
When used by estate agnets and on house buying TV shows -
'Property'
IT'S A BLASTED [b]HOUSE[/b] YOU HALFWIT! [i][b]HOUSE!! HOUSE!! HOUSE!![/b][/i]
sorry.
TJ my uncle used to be head of all things truck (lorry?) related at kielder forest.
He is old, has never read an american bike mag and still says fireroad.
your wrong 😉
'Property'IT'S A BLASTED HOUSE YOU HALFWIT! HOUSE!! HOUSE!! HOUSE!!
It's not necessarily a house, but it's always a property, is it not? Plus, if you want to get into a smart-arse competition, the house is simply the building - there's usually some land too - so talking buying 'the house' would be inaccurate, since you are buying the land too in most cases.
Get a grip!
Btw I thought they were called fire-roads because they used to be made with cinders..?
TJ - Americaneeze is not a word. Irony WIN.
Shakespeare for instance invented loads of new words and phrases
As did Milton, he was apparently one of our most neologistic literary figures. See, I invented a new word there too - anyone wanna complain about that one?
It's not necessarily a house
Yes, it is necessarily a house. Or a flat. Or a maisonette. Or a bungalow. Or something.
I'm not saying it wrong, and its definately irrational, but the term 'property' (Arrrrggghhhhh!) just grates against the very fabric of my soul when used like this, which is the point of the thread is it not? 🙂
Nonk
Interesting. I had never head them called fireroads until the rise of MTBing. Always forestry roads and firebreaks.
"MTFU"
Going forwards
People who aspirate the letter "aitch" as "haitch". They are found predominantly in the North.
Plebs.
rprt +1
Havent read the whole thread but people who use "literally" incorrectly.
I have heard commentators say (describing running)
"He is literally flying"
Probably already said, but spotted it in one of Chipps' reviews...
"Neat" as in - adopts best Britney Spears voice - "that's really neat"
Not a word but a method of speaking:
When people use an upward intination at the end of sentences implying a question when one does not exist. Used lots by Americans.
'Can I get'?
No, you can have, you faux American idiot.
And people who pronounce their th's as v's. Wiv, bovver etc.
They are found predominantly in the South.
Plebs.
Ginormous. Seems to have become a word on kids tv these days. IT'S NOT A F%^&iING WORD!
It's called the evolution of language. If the internet had existed hundreds of years ago they'd be moaning about the thousands of new words that we use day in day out today.
Still annoying though, I agree
People who aspirate the letter "aitch" as "haitch". They are found predominantly in the North
read a great quote once, can't remeber who came out with it
someone said they had an 'orrible 'eadache and the reply was "poor love, what you need is a couple of aspirates" 🙂
"A big ask": heard this on Radio 4 (Evan Davies), drives me mad. What the flipping heck 😀 is a 'big ask'?
"I'm good". What does that mean? "I'm working on behalf of all people to prouduce a positive outcome?" Or do they mean "I'm well/fine/OK."
Those two above are usually said by people who think they're trendy.
Also stupid people who use the phrase 'That begs the question....' They usually mean to say 'That raises the question...'.
We used to play a game at work where we would gain points by putting in word we had made up into a report, in a manner in which it would appear correct. We got extra points if we heard someone repeat that word 😀
My Mum used ginormous when I was a kid, it must be a word by now
We used to use Mark and Lard catchphrases in meetings, points lost if you were called on it.
Any business language which is designed to confuse the listener and demonstrate the incompetence of the speaker.
'Epic fail' - Or in fact, 'fail' used in reference to any action deemed to be unsatisfactory, distasteful or embarrassing, but not always unsuccessful.
Trending, as in "Trending now" on Yahoo.
The expression "My bad", annoying when said by an american, even more annoying when said by someone trying to be american.
"101%" "110%" etc, clearly nonsense, how can you have more than 100%.
"101%" "110%" etc, clearly nonsense, how can you have more than 100%
but it's usefully revealing - anyone that uses it can be safely ignored as a nincompoop :o)
No I get 150%. Its one and a half times the current level.
[i]It's called the evolution of language.[/i]
No it's not. The only place I've ever seen that phrase is on this bloody forum. STOP SAYING IT!!!
You want Americanisms? Our company is getting swamped by the bloody idiots who come off conference calls and start saying "I'll give you a heads up.." "Reach out to me.." etc. YOU'RE NOT IN NYPDFUDGINBLUE. Bastards.
I get really pissed about it. (That's another one!) Grrrrr.!!
Words which grate against the very fabric of your soul
god
ironically...
It's called the evolution of language.
No it's not.
OH YES IT IS!!
and HE'S BEHIND YOU!
I get really pissed about it. (That's another one!) Grrrrr.!!
see ? You can't help yourself 🙂
Any word spoken in this way:
When people use an upward intination at the end of sentences implying a question when one does not exist. Used lots by Americans.
Also used by lots of antipodeans and london types.