MegaSack DRAW - This year's winner is user - rgwb
We will be in touch
I've recently realised that I nearly always wee in the same part of the loo bowl, which got me wondering whether all the guys out there do the same and is it the same area?
So, given that the furthest part of the bowl (straight ahead) is 12 o'clock and the nearest bit is 6 o'clock, where do you aim? Side or water also.
This also presumes a bowl that is devoid of targets.
Me..... side/1:30.
Normally in the field while walking the dog if it's first thing 😳
On the compost.
maybe you need:
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Approx 9 o'clock, side above water line to cut down on noise
Wherever it goes
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In the shower at work. Bit awkward if someone is using it, but if you need to go, you need to go.
I have always found that, particularly in other people's houses, or in my own at night, water or side is still a dilemma for me.
If you wee into the water, often the whole house can here, not pleasant. If I direct it to the side to keep the noise down, does it sound like I am weeing all over the toilet seat and general 'non flushed' surfaces?
To answer your initial question though, I tend to go round in circles.
Depends if there's a particularly tenacious smear of turd I'm trying to hose off.
I see how high up the wall I can get it.
In the sink whilst brushing my teeth.
on the floor
Not saying, but let's say I think most bases have been covered above 😉
And what's with the post piss shiver?
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Often thought that one of these might reduce general overspray
Me too!Depends if there's a particularly tenacious smear of turd I'm trying to hose off.
Where do I pee? B&Q usually
For a few years I used a B&Q just south of Glasgow, which had a food van outside, as the last stop off when I was gathering materials for a job - I'd buy a few bits and bobs, buy a bacon roll and a coffee, then use their loo before setting off to where ever I was working that day.
Now, years later, as some sort of pavlov's dog conditioning, when I enter any branch of B&Q I immediately want a wee.
And the thread goes niche.
Either sting her with a jelly fish or set her on fire, both should work
Pretty much anywhere. If you're working late at night in a built up area with no loo your choices are limited. My own car has often been the target.
On the compost, in the toilet hand basin and when I do use the pan, sitting down. A well-trained, submissive Sitzpinkler me.
Too early for depravity then? 😛
Cold short stages/events and it's down the right leg in my bibs, longer stages and warm and I stop at the most convenient place, winters a faff as unlayering inevitably means dribbles.
HTH
Mainly in the flower beds at home, quicker than walking upstairs, just nip out the back and water the lavender...
Depends on whether the old chap is set to jet or spray.
On the lawn at 06:00 every morning. It gives me a chance to check out the weather.
At any other time in the Laufen home urinal I fitted in our downstairs bog:
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(That's a picture of the aiming fly, posted by Yak, above.)
When I was a kid we had static caravan in the lakes, it was off-grid so the lights were gas mantles. In the winter when the temperature dropped the gas pressure from the gas cylinders outside. So winter nights were spent chain-drinking tea and taking turns to go out and wee on the gas cylinders - each time we did the lights would get brighter.
I sit (wherever possible). I only stand in the pub or other suitably manky bogs.
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I see how high up the wall I can get it.
At primary school I knew a kid who could hit the ceiling - I shit you not.
At school we didn't aim for the ceiling, but did try to see how far back we could walk and still get it into the urinal. If you had a big enough piss you could get your arse on the radiator. A power piss Was what we called it.
He used to do it above the door so when other kids walked in they got a delightful little sprinkle on their heads 🙂
That boy is now my accountant 🙂
There is/was a sexual orientation issue in the US re water or side, side being considered somewhat effeminate.
Churchill used to visit his garden every morning just wearing a vest for a constitutional slash.
Like him, I use the garden, an Englishman's right/rite and all that. Sadly the compost bins are too high for my aerial trajectory.
Compost bins? I once threw an old bird's nest on the compost; it was hopping with fleas and Mrs Gti told me to burn it, which I didn't. I was in the habit of peeing on the compost and began to notice spots around my genital area then one day, mid-pee, I reslised that all the fleas were sensing my body heat and jumping on for some blood.
Mrs Gti went, er, hopping mad and insisted I paid to get the house treated for infestation.
[i]some sort of pavlov's dog conditioning, when I enter any branch of B&Q I immediately want a wee.[/i]
This! Anyone else have this? For me, it's my garage... as soon as I enter the garage to start working on something.. ping! Bladder calling! Back in the house.. or the kitchen. Get up, walk in the kitchen, just about to start preparing food.. ping! Bladder calling!
Bloody irritating it is.
pavlov's dog conditioning
Yes. For me it used to be putting on a wetsuit. So have a pre-emptive pee, put wetsuit on, need a pee again. Not had a wetsuit on for years now, but I imagine it will still happen.
This is the only reason I haven't become an astronaut. As soon as the suit went on I'd need a poo.
When going into English seas I always used to pee after I put the wetsuit on.
Being able to Pee whilst cycling is an objective of this years PDP.
Pavlov - as soon as I get somewhere where it's very inconvenient or embarrassing to need a pee, I need a pee 🙁
Mrs Gti went, er, hopping mad and insisted I paid to get the house treated for infestation.
So you caught crabs, and passed it off as fleas. Well done.
As for pissing
At night time, I often manage to dribble down my undies and have to change them.
How many of you sit down for a piss, forget to check the positioning and piss under the rim? Sometimes not finding out until your socks or trousers are wet?
May
[i]How many of you sit down for a piss, forget to check the positioning and piss under the rim? Sometimes not finding out until your socks or trousers are wet?[/i]
er, I did this when I was about 5 and cried for my mummy. Not since, as far as I can remember.
I've competed in a gazzilion sailing events, many events have Women participants. One particular memory was a lovely foredeck crew girlie dropping her sallopets and asking to be held off the stern of a racing 24tr (open cockpit) whilst she had a shit.
Just behind the startline..
With 10mins before the start sequence.
And we carried no loo roll, why would we?
She's still lovely to this day and once that kinda things been done/seen you kinda get over ablutions 😉
I aim for the water, that way when you pee at night and haven't turned on the light, you know when you are on target.
^ a risky strategy in the dark, if misjudged can end up with over correction, and piss everywhere.
Wet rooms do have their advantage.
I sit (wherever possible).
Elderly persons such as myself find this an inefficient way of voiding the bladder 🙁
True, but elderly persons such as myself find it a good way to keep our khaki corduroys dry.
I also dry the end to avoid the dreaded wet penny effect.
http://jezebel.com/jennifer-lawrence-is-not-a-trump-fan-pees-in-the-sink-1734114610
Soooo... Ladies?
In the kitchen sink if the bathroom is occupied or the drain outside the back door if its dark and I cant be bothered to walk upstairs
Toilet in my bathroom, the shower if it is the wife's bathroom. It is my own little rebellion.
If I can see, 12 o'clock/back wall so that it makes less noise. If it's late at night/dark, it will be a sit down job. Saves a lot of anguish and cleaning.
In the sink whilst brushing my teeth.
Perfect timing is required for this method to then shake and wash hand to then put electric tooth brush down having washed the brush.
Generally speaking though, as I'm youngish, and take it my prostate is still reasonably healthy then I do seem to slash above 12 o'clock.
When I am pissed, I tend to let it flow into the water in the bowl just to hear the sound like a heavy thunderstorm. Quite a refreshing sound I reckon.
In a cubicle. Alone. By myself. Always.
Communal pissing is for savages.
Having a slash is a time for quiet reflection and introspection. I don't want to have to carry on a conversation when i'm "in the zone"
When it comes to pishing, I'm a lone wolf.
on boundaries.
As I've taught my eldest son, and am presently teaching my youngest:
Downhill, downwind and preferably with a good view to take in.
In the shoes of my enemies.
Downhill, downwind and preferably with a good view to take in.
But not against a wall, if a strong wind is to your back, unless you really don't like anyone downwind on the other side of the wall.
Out of the hole in my willy
In the shoes of my enemies.
I just made a snorting noise and inhaled some coffee. Thanks.
Downhill, downwind and preferably with a good view to take in.
Off a Starbucks building whilst people watching I hope.
At the moment with minimal use of my legs ( yet again) sitting down after suitable adjustment of the foreskin to ensure I don't get wet pants/socks.
When said legs are working - usually around the 10 o'clock area so as theres no splashback and/or noise.
I just slosh it around, occasionally in premeditated circles. I do however always find myself muttering under my breath 'here comes the rain baby'.
I mainly use the flowerbeds outside, quicker than walking upstairs to the bathroom....
If there is a choice, as opposed to wherever it goes, I prefer to aim at those bloody silly disinfectant blobs that wife insists on sticking to the pan. How long do they last before I can knock them off?
[quote
http://www.scientificamerican.com/podcast/episode/21-second-rule-mammal-urination/
That can't be right. 21 seconds is out of my abilities. Wife on the other hand sounds like the Isle of Wight hovercraft gearing up for launch and I doubt she could wee for longer than five seconds if she tried. Truly disturbing.
Back to the wind.
Very drunk - wardrobe.
In the shower, sink, field, shop doorway - wherever.
If I'm pissed....I pee every where....then jump into bed wipe the drips on my wife's leg!!...ha ha ha
Have only one toilet in the house; keep your cupboards as cupboards. Piss in the kitchen sink when the loo's occupied. Simples 😀
I used to always need a piss when hiding while playing hide and seek. 20 years later I start playing the game with my eldest daughter and I still needed a piss when it was my turn to hide!
I leave the seat down, I like a bit of jeopardy in a house where I'm outnumbered 4 to 1 by the ladies. I do however refuse to use the big steel single urinal after the guy next to me just fired straight ahead thus spraying my legs(I'm in shorts) with a fine spray of warm straw water.
On the lawn at 06:00 every day. It saves water and is good for the grass.
In my home urinal with aiming fly at other times; WC pans being unsuitable for blokes standing up because of splashback.
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