Not having a contactless payment system - this is now a god given right so don't look at me in disgust cos I'm tapping my card on your ancient crappy pos system - it's your fault not mine!

This is funny in countries that haven't rolled out contactless yet, but the machine has the transducer in it so it has the symbol, and you wave your card at it to no effect and the cashier thinks you are a complete imbecile who has no idea how to use a credit card terminal 🙂

Can be amusing when the cashier's never seen it used before too, the "wait, what just happened?" look.

Cougar - Moderator

You have a staying-in jacket?

A smoking jacket, from Selfidge's Man's Shop, circa 1920. 8)

People who think retard is an acceptable term.

Please may I have a coffee.

Honestly, the standard of pedants is dropping around here.

'Can' is more often used in adult to adult conversation, it politely requests the ability to provide the cup of coffee. 'May' along with 'might' suggests there is a smaller possibility in your request being granted. 'May' does sound more polite even though a tad weaker as a request of a serving person but I was not arguing that point. Such timidity post Brexit is alarming.

Its a widely used term of abuse, get over it.

Its a widely used term of abuse, get over it.

When I was a kid, so was "mong" and "spacker".

😆 ^^
Never used spacker, Mong is apparently an abbreviation of Mongol and also widely used.

"The Game"

Never used spacker, Mong is apparently an abbreviation of Mongol and also widely used.

"Mong" was a derogatory reference to Down's syndrome. "Spacker" was a derogatory reference to cerebral palsy. Not really any different to calling someone a retard, when you think about it.

Words shouldn't dictate if you're offended or not, the context should.

I usually find those offended are normally those that cannot process that quick enough so rationalise their response with being offended.

No one should ever go full retard...

My next door neighbours, found out yesterday that they are moving away again, they moved to our sleepy village in Norfolk 9 months ago from Manchester area as they had loved the Norfolk coast when they holiday'ed here every year for 16 years.

Every time I have spoken to them, they have either stated:
"it really smells of the country here"
"broadband speed is slow"
"no bloody mobile reception"
"no public transport links, and they are retired and won't be able to drive forever"
"how long it takes to drive back to Manchester to see family when there are no motorways"

Unsurprisingly, living in a very rural area has issues, thankfully they are remedying all of the above, by moving back to Manchester suburbs, taking all SIX of their yappy small dogs with them!

Words shouldn't dictate if you're offended or not, the context should.

I remember a long and serious extraordinary assembly at school after one kid naively called another kid a "spaz" and it transpired that he was, in fact, actually spastic.

Words shouldn't dictate if you're offended or not, the context should.

Whilst I completely agree with that sentiment, sadly the world does not work that way. "****" is simply a contraction of ****stani after all, out of context it's not offensive in the slightest, right?

Sometimes, it's best just not to use some words, lest you look like a git.

Men in scarves.. dont ask me why.. I have no idea.

People who start 'I don't like this band' threads,wow really,you like some bands and not others,thats so interesting.Get over yourselves you attenion grabbing 12 year old ****.

Words shouldn't dictate if you're offended or not, the context should.

If the context is derogatory, the word has been chosen to cause offence. And the choice of word can say a lot about the author's prejudices and lack of consideration for others.

In other words, don't blame people for judging you if you use "retard" as an insult. See also "gay", etc.

I usually find those offended are normally those that cannot process that quick enough so rationalise their response with being offended.

No, it's not that. We're not 'ooh gosh how awful' offended.

The problem is that the use of terms like this is corrosive. It's associating a physical or mental condition, a sexual persuasion or whatever with scorn and mockery. The people who belong to those groups are now linked subconsciously with negatives. Now most people can get over this when they meet a person for real and get to know that person, but it shouldn't need getting over.

Indeed.

<mod>If this is going to turn into the full half hour, can we move it to it's own thread please?</mod>

STW threads that start as a bit of fun then get hijacked by hand wringers.

I remember a long and serious extraordinary assembly at school after one kid naively called another kid a "spaz" and it transpired that he was, in fact, actually spastic.

Did you go to the same school as me? Sat through a very similar assembly and had a lasting impact.

STW threads that start as a bit of fun then get hijacked by hand wringers.

people who use 'hand wringer' as way of avoiding engaging with the issue

Cougar - should be '...standard of pedantry.....' 😆

Stretched logos
People that walk at a slower pace than EVERYONE else in a crowd

This car is powered by angel dust.

Cougar - should be '...standard of pedantry.....'

There must be some sort of Muphry's Law equivalent for making pedantic comments on the Internet.

SUVs used to be the preserve of people with more money than taste who don't really like driving but want a fancy car. Now they are bloody everywhere.

I know what other people drive shouldn't bother me but this does

captainsasquatch - Member
This car is powered by angel dust.

Saw a car where someone had taken a black marker to it to write:

"Powered by Angel Dust.......driven by Jabba the Hutt"

We have a little pot in the kitchen for putting the cooking utensils in, my unwritten rule is that the only things that go in there are the 5 or 6 items that are the set, so the ladle, potato masher etc, they are obviously a set, they have the same handles and belong together.

What annoys me is the MiL putting things in there that quite clearly don't belong in there, wooden spoons etc, they go in the draw, the draw she will have taken them out of everytime she has had to use them for the last 10 years, why are you putting these back in eh wrong place over and over again??

I thought that was as bad as it could get, then just recently, little things that actually fit inside the pot so you can't even see them in there as they are down inside, peelers, pizza cutters, they have started being hidden in there, blade up - thanks for that.

Then, the final straw the things that do belong in the pot ending up in the draw because the pot is overfilled with rogue items.

they go in the draw, the draw she will have taken them out of

People who say 'draw' instead of drawer.

they go in the draw

I just can't picture your MiL doing that.

We have a little pot in the kitchen for putting the cooking utensils in, my unwritten rule is that the only things that go in there are the 5 or 6 items that are the set, so the ladle, potato masher etc, they are obviously a set, they have the same handles and belong together.

What annoys me is the MiL putting things in there that quite clearly don't belong in there, wooden spoons etc, they go in the draw, the draw she will have taken them out of everytime she has had to use them for the last 10 years, why are you putting these back in eh wrong place over and over again??

I thought that was as bad as it could get, then just recently, little things that actually fit inside the pot so you can't even see them in there as they are down inside, peelers, pizza cutters, they have started being hidden in there, blade up - thanks for that.

Then, the final straw the things that do belong in the pot ending up in the draw because the pot is overfilled with rogue items.

At last, someone who really read the brief.

😀

Muphry's Law

... any of them who fantasise about Nigel Farage leading the country go automatically into the Fascist camp.

I don't think it dilutes the past;

Nigel Farage is a small-minded populist nob.
Mussolini was a small-minded populist nob.
General Franco was a small-minded populist nob.

No dilution going on there.

GWR's booking system.

Muphry's Law

?

Basically, if you pick apart someone else's typing / spelling, you'll invariably spell something wrong yourself in the process.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muphrys_law

Seems it also applies to pedantry, so there should be a law for it. "Cougar's Law of Pedantry" for instance, to pluck a random name out the air arbitrarily.

Whilst we're on flying, people who quite clearly take the piss with carry on luggage. You know what the size limits are so no, you can't squeeze that 65l rucksack into the overhead locker.

Flight attendants who ask me to put my small backpack under the seat in front, where I was planning to put my feet, so that some muppet can put his 65l rucksack in the locker.

to pluck a random name out the air arbitrarily.

Surely you mean "to pluck arbitrarily" ?

Having to take out and manually scan in my tesco club card when I can pay by just touching my wallet on the scanner.

People clogging up the queue at the self-checkouts in Tesco by scanning clubcards and paying by card, instead of using PayQwiq on their phones.

When I take the time to quote for work, which can often involve days of research, phone-calls etc.. and if I don't get the work said person doesnr even have the decency to say thanks but no thanks.

That Amoy soy sauce bottles now have a much larger orifice. ensuring that half the contents of the bottle are sloshed all over my takeaway in a split second, utter W@NXERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Basically, if you pick apart someone else's typing / spelling, you'll invariably spell something wrong yourself in the process.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muphrys_law

Surely you mean "to pluck arbitrarily" ?

Can be amusing when the cashier's never seen it used before too, the "wait, what just happened?" look.

Doing it with one's phone also blows the occasional mind.

Surely you mean "to pluck arbitrarily" ?

I would have thought "to arbitrarily pluck".

Assuming you don't wish to split any infinitives it can be either "to pluck arbitrarily" or "arbitrarily to pluck" but not "to arbitrarily pluck"

This is because "to pluck" is the infinitive form of the verb so should remain as such with any adjectives applied to the beginning or end.

HTH 😉

Just like the amoy sauce bottle i bought cheapy btwin oil for my chain but every time i go to use it i unscrew the full lid and it goes everywhere chain, rim , tyre watercourse. Its a design fault and i forget every time

So called trades people who use the wrong screwdriver bit in a battery drill.
The noise as its rounding the screw off makes me want to stab them in the face.

****ends.

Noisy breathers.

The frequency work expects me to change my network password.

The fact that in 19 years I have proved totally unable to teach any of my children that putting something inside the dishwasher, actually means putting it inside the dishwasher, and not just in close vicinity to it.

Posties delivering mail at this time of year wearing shorts. Its Baltic outside and the just walk their legs must be freezing , school kids are as bad with short sleeves with that dont i look hard look, as the Arctic Monkeys once said they must be f-----g freezin

Assuming you don't wish to split any infinitives it can be either "to pluck arbitrarily" or "arbitrarily to pluck" but not "to arbitrarily pluck"

Not that there's any reason to avoid split infinitives...

Websites that order things most popular first and not price ascending or descending. For maximum petty annoyance websites that show 10 per page and when changed to the maximum per page, it is back as most popular first 👿

People who (when opening their front door to receive mail) stand gawping at the Postie's legs, simultaneously letting all of the heat escape from their homeostatically-sealed, perma-hot residence.

'Global warming? Hahha, you're kidding, it's freezing out there!'
'It quite literally isn't. As you see, I'm wearing shorts, in fact it's the mildest January I've ever experienced'
'BBrrrrrRRrr! Eh?' (door-slam)

Filling the car with petrol,always hated it!
Clothes tags.
Bad cake.
Ignorant / arrogant people.
Oversized packaging.
Passwords, too many to remember!
Too many effin' remote controls.
Too many different chargers for too many bits of technology!