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First and Steerage
For the really dark depths of humour:-
Markham & Hartley
Or
Probable & Certain
Well if it was down to me this idea would be kicked in to touch. The potential for confusion is there and should be avoided at all costs. It’s really not something to apply dicking about to.
Did all you wet blankets even read the OP? Each lift will have a "proper ID for the maintenance records". These are nicknames
Yes that’s why the word confusion was used.
Car
Bike
Angelina and Brad
Ok, a bit dated now they despise each other - but there's a bit of gender/sexuality equality - something for everyone.
I reckon first thing in the morning I'd like to cruise up with Brad and talk nonsense (probably eating, he's always eating) and in the evening I'd like to ride down slow with Angelina to wind down.
Or.....'Diabetes' and 'Heart Disease' - a little daily reminder to 'TAKE THE STAIRS YOU LAZY ****ERS'
In the spirit of The Grand Shaft at Dover https://doverwesternheights.org/grand-shaft/
"Officers and their ladies" and "Sergeants and their wives" with the stairs marked "Soldiers and their women"
Peat / Diesel?
Salt&Pepper / Justin Bieber (bit niche, but fans of the above will have the song stick in their head all day)
Smells of farts / smells of wee
Or go full Nursey?
"Loosey (the one on the left) and Tighty (the one on the right)"
so No1 and No3.
Sorted.
Can we have the "Are You Being Served" floor announcements in the lifts?
- Ground floor: Perfumery, Stationery and leather goods, Wigs and haberdashery, Kitchenware and food... Going up!
- First floor: Telephones, Gents' ready-made suits, Shirts, socks, ties, hats, Underwear and shoes... Going up!
- Second floor: Carpets, Travel goods and bedding, Material, soft furnishings, Restaurant and teas... Going down!
At my old workplace we had offices like "Upstairs Meeting Room 2" and it was dead easy to find because it was upstairs and between meeting rooms 1 and 3. Then some bright spark had the idea of renaming them all to things like "Turing." Net result, staff spent half their working day going "Where's Turing?" - "Fuctifino mate."
Same here, engineering company, lets name them after famous engineers.
Except they've named them after famous computer engineers (Turing, Lovelace, Caverndish) which both means we have no idea where they are, or even who they are. They could at least have picked engineers from the industry we work in!
Arthur and Maggie?
Obviously the one on the left is Arthur.
Snake and ladder.
Easy come easy go.
Snatch and jerk.
Scylla and Charybdis
Arse and Elbow
Lusitania and Titanic