MegaSack DRAW - This year's winner is user - rgwb
We will be in touch
I'm having 2 new office lifts installed at the moment, and I'll need to get labels made for them. This is my opportunity to give them each a stupid name on a nameplate that isn't dead obvious alongside the proper ID for the maintenance records. Go on then, give it your best shot.
For inspiration they are Kone MonoSpace 500 models.
Anyone suggesting Lifty McLiftface is immediately disqualified. I won't be able to name them anything offensive, but I don't mind the suggestions being made here.
Bert and Ernie
Upper & Downer
Kim & Aggie
Heaven & Hell
“To me” and “to you”
or
“Withnail” and “I”
Tom & Jerry
Salt 'n' Pepa
Label by lift call button saying "Push it Real Good"
Salt 'n' Pepa
Label by lift call button saying "Push it Real Good"
Love that.
(Much more than the new forum 😬)
Westlife and Status Quo.
The Archbishop Desmond Tutu and Darren
Picolax and Sudocrem
It'll raise questions that no one wants answered.
Kone is close enough to Kona for some bike references so Stinky and Humuhumu-Nukunuku-A-Pua'a
Ice Cream, and Chips
Both contained by K(c)ones
Father Robula Conundrum and Father Todd Unctious, Todd, Todd, Todd, how are'yeh Todd.
Up and Down.
Imagine the confusion.
Loosey (the one on the left) and Tighty (the one on the right)
Loosey (the one on the left) and Tighty (the one on the right)
Up and Down. Imagine the confusion that could cause.
"Push me" and "pull you"
Heaven and Hell
If they are workplace lifts I'd call them Dantés Lifts because every floor will be a level of hell. Even better if they go to 9 floors.
"Daddy" and "Chips".
Although I do like salt n pepa, once they're ready you can send an email round titled Salt n pepa's here!
Must admit I'd not though of a pair of partners names, it's a good idea though. I fear a lot of the staff who work here are too young to know who Salt 'n Pepa are.
Surely all the better for the joke?
I keep making prodigy jokes at work. A solid half my office was born after their payday.
And when people ask why you called them salt'n'pepa you can tell them it's...
"None of your business"
Please make sure one is called Otis
Reminds me of favourite dad joke....Why should you not fart in a lift?
.......its wrong on so many levels...
The Vanishing Cabinets
Call them both Schindler. A great if not dark joke, and will completely confuse the lift engineers when they find out that they aren't made by Schindler.
S & M
Daedalus and Icarus
Ronnie and Regie.
Whichever you choose, you have to go inside...
Starsky and Hutch.
Obvious elevator music is obvious....
Tower of Terror - that's what our glass lifts are nick named.
Ant & Dec
Keep swapping the labels round so nobody can remember which one is which
Call them both Schindler.
When you're working on industrial equipment, causing confusion to the maintenance engineers about their work location is definitely not a great idea! 😁
If one's Otis then the other one has to be Marvin.
And there'll be lots of people coming in, and going out again.
Or just Vic and Bob, or Bob and Paul - 'and away!'
Oskar & Itzhak
Felix & Meike
Bill and Ben
Wide, Narrow
Ellie and Vader
How about designating useful names that inform anyone that actually might need to know a factual name! Example, passenger lift 1. Goods lift, north lift etc etc.
Haunted and Probably Not Haunted
Geri and Christian. 😉
Polly and Lucian: sometimes up, sometimes down, but always… around.
How about designating useful names that inform anyone that actually might need to know a factual name! Example, passenger lift 1. Goods lift, north lift etc etc.
Well it's just a bit dull really. We've already got Alimak 1 and Alimak 2 and Dragon lift in different buildings. Officially these are called CNC-09-SGS-GEN-LFT1 and ... LFT2, I just thought this might be a innocent, low consequence dicking about.
Currently considering Titanic and Hindenburg. Might get told no on that one.
"Daddy" and "Chips".
Doddy or Chipps
Vermicious and Knid
"Daddy" and "Chips".
Doddy or Chipps
Boring sensible answer: number them. Otherwise maintenance crews will forever be going "which one's Chas and which one is Dave, again?" Or if there's only two in total, Left and Right. Lefty McLiftface and Righty McLiftface.
At my old workplace we had offices like "Upstairs Meeting Room 2" and it was dead easy to find because it was upstairs and between meeting rooms 1 and 3. Then some bright spark had the idea of renaming them all to things like "Turing." Net result, staff spent half their working day going "Where's Turing?" - "Fuctifino mate."
Best thing that my workplace (> 2000 people) ever did was to label every pillar and every floor plate consistently. Pillars are labelled by relative position from the North or South and East or West of the building, floor plates are Floor, North or South, East, Centre or West so 2NW is second floor, North West plate.
My former site renamed numbered buildings to "Turing", "Babbage" etc. it was very confusing at the time and when I left 2 years later people were still using the old numbers.
Beat me to it!
Face and Butt we’re my immediate thought!
Butt and Face
Boring sensible answer: number them. Otherwise maintenance crews will forever be going "which one's Chas and which one is Dave,
Dude, literally 3 posts above yours! A unique identifier is safety critical, this is just titting about.
Ant is always on the left. Problem solved.
As a Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy fan,
Happy Vertical People Transporters
double and post
A bit surprised no-one’s suggested Ethan and Joel
Well if it was down to me this idea would be kicked in to touch. The potential for confusion is there and should be avoided at all costs. It’s really not something to apply dicking about to.
The Sun
Uranus
Ground-Breaking and New Heights
Upper and downer.
I take it theres a fabulous prize for the best suggestion
Express & Economy
Schindler is already a make of lift, so bin dun.
Do ‘management’ and ‘staff’, and put nice carpet in the management one with nice music and a flickering lightbulb in the staff one, with electrical failure sound effects like being in Blade Runner.
Filch and snitch
Well if it was down to me this idea would be kicked in to touch. The potential for confusion is there and should be avoided at all costs. It’s really not something to apply dicking about to.
Did all you wet blankets even read the OP? Each lift will have a "proper ID for the maintenance records". These are nicknames
When in the Queen Elizabeth(glasgow) hospital visiting mum, me and Sis were in the lift which was packed. As a joke I turned to Sis and said " Is this the lift that got stuck the other day"
All eyes turned to me 😆