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[Closed] Weddings do they really cost that much........

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A guy I worked with got married quickly as they found out a baby was on the way. Her family were quite middleclass and were not impressed when they were told it was in the registry office followed by a trip to pizza express to make the most of the all you can eat lunch buffet then to one of the local pubs.

The bride and groom were happy and surely thats all that matters!


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 5:03 pm
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you'd be better buying a a half decent digital camera and passing it around. Maybe write "wedding camera" on it with a sparkly marker.

That wouldn't end well with some of my wedding guests...


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 5:14 pm
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Ours was around a £800
village hall family done the catering,wife's cousin had a mobile disco it was a brilliant party
no honeymoon as we were doing up our first flat funnily enough had our 20th anniversary party
in the same place last year cost was around the same,bottom line is it can be as expensive as you want it to
be it's all about personel choice have a friend whose getting married next year and they have the whole wedding planner,cake tasting,floral selection ,band auditions etc think the costs are crippling them !!


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 5:28 pm
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I loved my wedding. Registry office but all mates there. Dad did photos but he quite good. Huge party at our house. Masses of lovely food all done by a caterer. I sorted all the booze - great barrels full of ice and champagne, some really nice wines plus we had a kids bouncy castle in the garden. Fantastic atmosphere and great value.
I would have found it hard to give away a load of cash for formalities I did not want, some chicken and underwhelming sparkling wine. The fact it did not cost a fortune made it so easy to relax and enjoy a huge day in our lives with family and friends. So if you have unlimited funds then go for it otherwise you really don't have to bankrupt yourself.


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 5:46 pm
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Ours cost about the same in total as the OP is spending on inviting one couple. 20 years on and after observing many couples I have a theory: the success of a marriage is inversely proportional to the amount the couple themselves spend on the wedding.


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 7:47 pm
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I think ours came to about 5-6K 9 years ago - father in law paid for most of it. We hired the local village hall and got caterers in - about 100 to 120 guests plus a few more at night. It was a brilliant day and pretty good value I reckon. There's no need to spend a ridiculous amount of money, and i'm sure we still would have had a brill time if the budget was less. I could quite fancy doing it again actually!


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 8:08 pm
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It's like a competition for who spent the least on their wedding. C'mon, surely someone out there has done the £15K plus? Dish please. 🙂


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 8:15 pm
 hora
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The Christian ceremony makes me sick.

22yrs together, no faux-religious social shit.


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 8:20 pm
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The Christian ceremony makes me sick.

Nothing like tolerance. Any other religions you hate?


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 8:36 pm
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Why does the cost matter? Isn't that a personal choice?

But you have to smile. Marriage is (correctly IMO) perceived a something special, something that is protected by law, an institution where we are happy to re-write history to ensure that it is available to all irrespective of sex, religion (or otherwise) etc. It is a mark of the most important human emotion - love - and a sign of long term commitment between two people. Hopefully it is something that we only do once, or at least only a very small number or times, in our lifetimes and yet despite all this we get,

..."how much? I could buy a bloody bike for that!"

Tis a strange world!?!


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 8:39 pm
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We spent £16k on ours - and that was without parental financial support.

We could've had a great day for much less money as many have demonstrated on here, but we wanted lots of extras - a classic Ford for her, a new Lamborghini for me (hired not bought!), a meal for 100 people, gifts for close friends/family etc etc.

We were fortunate enough to be able to afford it and had the desire to do it and we've no regrets.


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 8:48 pm
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Yay! £16K 😮

Any advances on that then?


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 8:50 pm
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I think I'm just past the 16k mark and still have a few bits to sort out.


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 9:01 pm
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Only bit of advice I can give is don't tell the people you are booking that it's for a wedding as that word seems to mean a license to print money.

I got married in NZ and then did the party and re-affirmation of vows in the UK. When booking the venue I said it was a wedding party and the price was £1800, I then phoned back a couple of days later and said it was a family party and the price went down to £750. The same with the disco - £1000 for a wedding party, £450 for a family party.

The divorce was only £500 though 😆


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 9:04 pm
 hora
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"Nothing like tolerance" Totally agree. Lets see the Church of England embrace marriage between a man and man or woman and woman.


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 9:05 pm
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I think £20k+ is pretty normal in the South East, for a traditional wedding with all the trappings.


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 9:09 pm
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The wedding I enjoyed most was the smallest & cheapest: registry office & a big meal afterwards for not very many people.

The two most expensive weddings I've been to were least fun, and both ended in divorce.

I think there's a moral in there somewhere, so if you're spending north of £5k, you're doing something wrong.


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 9:09 pm
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I think there's a coincidence in there somewhere

FTFY 😀


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 9:17 pm
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Ours cost just over £10k - we got married at Rowton Castle. My mother paid for it - I think she just wanted to see me in a dress! 😆

Bizarrely my brother and his wife got married in the same venue, but their wedding cost twice as much. I think the fact her dress was £1500 more expensive than mine was probably part of it!


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 9:37 pm
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The thing is, for me it was a day and I'd have been happy to have done it cheaper but for the Mrs it was something she'd been dreaming of and planning her whole life. In that context the cost is worth it. I kept an eye on individual expenses and negotiated down where I could but I made it clear I didn't ever want to know the final amount. Did make her promise it wouldn't be over £10k though.


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 9:45 pm
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Yes, given that something like 40% of all marriages end in Divorce, you're going to get a lot of expensive weddings ending in divorce AND a lot of cheap weddings as well......


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 9:49 pm
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I'll leave it Hora as the thread has sensible direction at the moment


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 10:05 pm
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Think we had change from £3500 , 11 years ago and still hanging in there !!
We both worked for the same company, so the MD in his E class merc was the chauffeur for a beer, friend was an avid photographer, so we gave him £150 for the day. 40 guests in the registry office ( no more room for more) so fed them at the wedding breakfast and then 100 guests on top at the evening do, with a workmate being a DJ for a favour ( although we gave him something) and mum put some cash behind the bar for the evening. I bought a suit and the mrs got a dress with a seperate top , so she could wear it again as not a wedding dress. Great day and night.
My sister, on the other hand spent £40 grand on hers. Which still astounds me. Was a great place and do, but bloody well should have been. I gave her away, so was chuffed to do that too.


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 10:14 pm
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I think ours is gonna be about £15k, in 5 weeks time.
That is for 70 day guests and an additional 30 in the evening. And that includes a honeymoon of 7 nights in Sri Lanka doing a tour and 7 nights in the Maldives, which we decided to splash out on as we don't normally do expensive holidays. So the honeymoon is gonna be about a third of the cost...
The cost of stuff and the requirements did seem to escalate once a few wedding magazines had been bought!

We won our photography in a competition at a wedding fair, so that saved us probably £1000 or so.


 
Posted : 19/05/2013 10:38 pm
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You don't need to spend much. All you need is a room and some mates. The rest is all you being milked.


 
Posted : 20/05/2013 7:39 am
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So ... what's the deal with second marriages? Have received an invite from a middle-aged relly who's getting married for the second time.

My response will be to jog on as I have no desire to attend and frankly would rather be riding my bike!

Am I being unreasonable? 😉


 
Posted : 20/05/2013 7:52 am
 mt
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Hora, the Church of England would let you through their doors, that is tolerance.

Have considered any other religious organisations view on same sex marriage? One originating from the Middle East perhaps or was only the C of E that upset your childhood?


 
Posted : 20/05/2013 8:06 am
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Dragging the thread back a bit: we mangaed to make a profit on ours. We paid for it all ourselves using the woods around our rented cottage as camping and mates helping out with everything. We had a ceremony at the local registry office with immediate family a meal at the pub and off ot a hotel fo the night. We then spent a day organising the big party and hog roast when we had about 200 mates/family for the big ceilidh. Parents insisted on chipping in so by the time we got back from honeymoon (camping around Cape Wrath) we came out about £300 up. Anybody else manage that?


 
Posted : 20/05/2013 8:21 am
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Vegas for me. Think the ceremony cost $500 including photographs and limo. They beam the ceremony live via web to friends back home if you want them too. On to San Francisco for honeymoon.


 
Posted : 20/05/2013 8:22 am
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We get married in just under 2 weeks time.

I'm 25 and mrs Crispo to be is 24.

To be completely honest we are both from very fortunate backgrounds and our parents have insisted on paying for the wedding for us. I've obviously paid for honeymoon, rings, hotel for the night, gifts for parents/ushers etc.

To be honest I dread to think what the total cost has come to, we're having 120 day guests then another 40odd for the evening. Think we are expecting a few more at church too. That's just the way it is when you have a big family and lots of close family friends. All I know is that I am very very grateful that we've had so much support!

I honestly can't wait for it now!


 
Posted : 20/05/2013 8:23 am
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@cinamon_girl - attendance is not compulsory

@crispo - good luck

My wedding cost a few hundred, registry office plus food and drinks in the back garden

My daughters will be a bit under £25k for 80 guests


 
Posted : 20/05/2013 8:27 am
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Crispo, good luck and hope you have a cracking day...

Sounds pretty similar to ours back in 2005. In-laws caught the venue, food, flowers and photographer; my parents supplied the booze (breakfast and bar) plus entertainment; we paid for dress, rings, honeymoon, presents, wedding night etc. I think the whole thing came in around £12k for 80 odd dinner guests and 20-30 extra in the evening. We were really lucky and caught a new venue just as it was gaining momentum, paid £2k for what now costs around £4k 😯 . Food and booze was about £5k from memory and this included a paid bar, obviously this is one area you can save a packet if you're looking to do so. We supplied the wine for the meal and paid corkage of about £1.50 per bottle IIRC.

Far to say it was a superb day and is, by far, the most enjoyable (formal) day we've had. We still have mates referring back to it as a classic which is nice. The guests are the most important component IMO, clearly the bride takes center stage but if you want a memorable day then make sure your guests are catered for and you'll have a blast. [b]DON'T[/b] treat it as a reunion for old friends and distant family, it's your day and it's yours (and your parents) money, why waste it on people you don't see often and who don't play an active roll in your life? From my experience this is where weddings come unstuck with disparate groups of people milling around and not interacting... if most of the people know each other it's much, much more fun.

[u]Some of the points that worked for us were;[/u]

A Friday wedding. Although guests needed a day off to attend it meant they still got a weekend, it's was also half the price of a Saturday so we could pamper them a bit more. Everything at one venue so no trooping between church / registry and reception. Once they arrived guests could relax and start to get in to the spirit. The venue included accommodation for about two thirds of the guests (mix of bedrooms and cottages on the estate), obviously this was extra but guests were happy to pay as they would have a hotel. Meant the party went on into the small hours...

We left at about 11.30pm and went to stay in a very nice (cosy) local pub. It was rather entertaining walking in in full wedding atire and the look on the locals faces was hilarious... I ended up pulling pints behind the bar and my wife got heaps of attention. Safe to say a good move. If we'd stayed I'd have got pissed with mates and probably slept on one of the chairs 😳

I have to plug the venue as it and it's staff were amazing. Chris, the owner, was taking guests for tours of the wine celler and letting them sneak a few glasses. If you take a look remember we only paid £2k so you can see we got an amazing price, it's a whole lot more than that now...

[url= http://www.orchardleigh.net/ ]Orchardleigh House[/url]


 
Posted : 20/05/2013 9:39 am
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how good can a single 8 hour period be? I mean £30k on a wedding?

Mention the word 'wedding' to a business and it's keeerrching£££££££.

My mate spent a fortune on a wedding at a very grand hall in cheshire. They went to select the wine for the dinner and got charged half the normal restaurant price for a full bottle for a tiny sip of each despite the fact the catering alone was costing £15k.

"would madam like the standard air or the premium luxury wedding air on the best day of her life"


 
Posted : 20/05/2013 10:22 am
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my wedding cost about £30k.....and that was just on my side...i think my wife's family spent about £15k on their part....i had about 800 guests and she had about 700....we come from big families...that was 7 years ago.....that's asian weddings for you!!


 
Posted : 20/05/2013 3:18 pm
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I couldn't get over the fact that most places charge you for a cake stand and a knife.....

You pay anywhere from £5k upwards for a venue with some grub and then it's £50 for them to provide you with something to stick your cake on & cut it with....! They try to make it sound like they are doing you a favour too!!

Oh, and would you like us to cover our tatty worn out chairs with a cotton throw and some ribbon?? Yes. OK, then. Bend over and take it like a man.......


 
Posted : 20/05/2013 3:29 pm
 D0NK
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Bend over and take it like a man.......
you do seem to get reamed for anything prefixed with "wedding"


 
Posted : 20/05/2013 3:42 pm
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Oh, and would you like us to cover our tatty worn out chairs with a cotton throw and some ribbon?? Yes. OK, then. Bend over and take it like a man.......

We found this. But the mrs is from a family business who doing furniture covers and reupholstery so we are getting 120 covers made for our do!! 😯


 
Posted : 20/05/2013 4:01 pm
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you do seem to get reamed for anything prefixed with "wedding"

Yep, is a very expensive business! We're doing all the non essentials ourselves - invites, table decorations, table plans, favours, flowers, have a friend doing photography for nought (other than lending him my D4, flashes and lenses etc). Bride will arrive in her Dad's Kia etc. Still managing to spend £15k which is truly shocking when you think about it.


 
Posted : 20/05/2013 5:22 pm
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Got married 7 years ago. Decided to only invite friends, family could go 'do one' (his side: rabid right-wingers, my side: lazy-bum Welsh). There were 15 of us all in. Went to registry office then to posh restaurant.

Had a fantastic time. Food: £650 (told you it was posh), rings < £1000, license £60 for partnership.

Even now people tell me it was the best wedding they'd been to.


 
Posted : 20/05/2013 5:47 pm
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cinnamon_girl - Member
So ... what's the deal with second marriages? Have received an invite from a middle-aged relly who's getting married for the second time.

My response will be to jog on as I have no desire to attend and frankly would rather be riding my bike!

Am I being unreasonable?


Well, that all depends on how close you are surely? As above, it's not compulsory to attend, and it being a second marriage shouldn't really make a difference, should it?
When my bro and Tess got married, the ladies in the registry office said afterwards that it was one of the best weddings they'd had for ages, because it was a second for both, they were very relaxed, and there was a great atmosphere.
They didn't bother with a car, they walked from their house to the RO, about half a mile or so, then Jon rode his bike to the clubhouse at Kemble, while Tess wore a crimson leather corset and long skirt and travelled over on a trike, escorted by around sixty or seventy bikes, and the owner of Kemble Airfield did a low level fly-past in his black Hunter as they all drove onto the road running alongside the runway! They then had a blessing at the clubhouse by one of the bikers who's an RAF padre.
Now that's cool. 8)
[edit] just found a photo at the clubhouse. Didn't cost much...
[IMG] [/IMG]


 
Posted : 20/05/2013 7:21 pm
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Even now people tell me it was the best wedding they'd been to.

I tell everyone that [i]theirs[/i] was the best wedding I attended too. 😀


 
Posted : 20/05/2013 7:30 pm
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I tell everyone that theirs was the best wedding I attended too.

😉


 
Posted : 20/05/2013 10:59 pm
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went to a wedding on Saturday.. was prob one of the most fun weddings i can remember being at.... prob i didn't get completely totalled and was still standing at the end of the night.

wasn't massively expensive, 8k? i think.


 
Posted : 20/05/2013 11:40 pm
 grum
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Thos thread is a weird mixture of people boasting about how expensive and amazing their wedding was or boasting about how cheap and amazing their wedding was. 🙂


 
Posted : 20/05/2013 11:42 pm
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[url= http://i419.photobucket.com/albums/pp271/repackrider/avatar235.jp g" target="_blank">http://i419.photobucket.com/albums/pp271/repackrider/avatar235.jp g"/> [/IMG][/url]
[url= http://sonic.net/~ckelly/Seekay/mtbwelcome.htm ][b]2retro4u[/b][/url]
Marin County, Cali

Dropping in late here, but...

Length of the marriage is in inverse ratio to the expense. We got married 27 years ago at the courthouse for the filing fee. Took about fifteen minutes. We swore to a bureaucrat that we would be trustworthy, loyal, faithful, etc. Essentially the Boy Scout pledge.

Then we spent a bunch of money on a party.


 
Posted : 02/06/2013 3:37 am
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