The marked differen...
 

MegaSack DRAW - This year's winner is user - rgwb
We will be in touch

[Closed] The marked difference between peoples e-mail and their "in person" character.

13 Posts
10 Users
0 Reactions
82 Views
Posts: 373
Full Member
Topic starter
 

Call me a dunce for only just noticing but at work I have recently became aware of how a person comes across on e-mail and what they are like in person the difference can be huge!

The specific situation I am talking about is when you have correspondence with either a person working at an other office, or a client, neither of which you have spoken to or met in person.

Often said person can come across as agressive or snippy via their e-mail character, but when you meet them in person they are cordial, polite and good company.

Thinking this through what might be the factors influencing this?

How you interpet their written word.
No body language to gauge what mood they are in.
No voice intonation

Etc.

I guess when you think about it their is a huge amount of message delivery information absent within an e-mail with respect to their character.

thats it.

cheers

S


 
Posted : 03/07/2010 9:14 am
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

If anything gets a bit awkward, I ALWAYS use the phone - seen too many situations flare up when relying on email.


 
Posted : 03/07/2010 9:31 am
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

the measure of someone is how many awkward conversations they're willing to have


 
Posted : 03/07/2010 9:36 am
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Depends on your job I guess. Not many awkward situations in this job. Some must be horrendous.


 
Posted : 03/07/2010 9:39 am
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

All true. Phone's much better. If I need to do it by email, I lay it on thick with the conciliatory stuff.
So instead of "I trained you all how to do this, and have already told you since about these failings. Pull your finger out you incompetent blah blah", I'll say..
"Thanks for your efforts last time in addressing teething problems. There's been a definite improvement since last time. I apreciate that blah blah , there are some really good examples.. hopefully they'll all be like this soon. Please could you address the following minor points with your teams.."

I want to say the first one, but I say the second one. Result = no pissed off people. I get what I want.


 
Posted : 03/07/2010 9:39 am
 D0NK
Posts: 592
Full Member
 

Yeah I've noticed it too at work, either people are really bad at expressing themselves in just text (not the easiest thing - 90% of communication is nonverbal I was told at a disciplinery) or it's the keyboard warrior aspect kicking in.


 
Posted : 03/07/2010 9:52 am
Posts: 2
Free Member
 

I use both in work at least.
Email's provide you with a written copy of the conversation so nobody can deny what they said.
Then you phone them up and make sure they understand the tone.


 
Posted : 03/07/2010 11:14 am
Posts: 5807
Free Member
 

I try and speak face-to-face by preference, next preferred option is to use the phone and only email as a last resort or to confirm in writing what I've already discussed and agreed by speaking to someone.

I believe that if you start off by email with an eye to covering your arse you're already halfway to a communication breakdown. And when you start to see people copying everyone and their dog in on the correspondence it's a lost cause.


 
Posted : 03/07/2010 12:48 pm
Posts: 2
Free Member
 

[i]I believe that if you start off by email with an eye to covering your arse you're already halfway to a communication breakdown[/i]

Or you're dealing with people who you know will regularly retract what they say.


 
Posted : 03/07/2010 12:52 pm
Posts: 150
Free Member
 

If email is your primary contact then all hope is lost, bail whilst you can.


 
Posted : 03/07/2010 8:02 pm
Posts: 184
Free Member
 

I spent a long while communicating with someone about a bike event. Their emails seemed really quite serious. No humour, no exclamation marks etc.

Met them finally and they were incredibly witty and funny, just very dry. Read some of their emails back afterwards and sort of got the sense of humour!

Agree with the emails at work thing. Worst is emailed someone sat right by you...FFS!

🙂


 
Posted : 03/07/2010 8:06 pm
Posts: 373
Full Member
Topic starter
 

We had a set of project e-mails going back and forward copying everyone and their brother trying to sort out price, timelines, contracts etc. It got ridiculous and very time wasting, so one hour long teleconference with all the aprties sortd out all the issues.

E-mails a great tool but can be time wasting and damaging used in the wrong way.

I am going to use it much less going forward.


 
Posted : 04/07/2010 10:32 am
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

I am going to use it much less going forward

good to see some blue sky thinking there


 
Posted : 04/07/2010 10:40 am
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

if you want to see what email correspondence can create you should take a look at [url= http://www.27bslash6.com/ ]THIS[/url] website. genuine correspondences with an exceptionally rude man, who I am sure is quite a nice guy in person!

pay particular attention to the Dear neighbour, you're not invited to my Party transcript


 
Posted : 04/07/2010 11:37 am