[Closed] The curious art of talc'ing your balls...

I've just started doing this as recommended by my doctor, betty swallocks and not being completly dry before dressing was the cause of a little pronlem, that tuned into a big problem

It can be a bit odd doimg it at the gym in front of people though 😳

is there not an increased risk of cancer if you use talc regularly?

I confess - after commuting home, I then need to walk the dog (or ride again with the dog), can't be bothered with 2 showers, so a bit of sweat absorbing powder works wonders.
The ladies love it I can asure you.
(Has to be Johnsons Baby Powder)

yoshimi... you could just use the hair dryers, or if you go to a posh gym... dip your knackers in the dyson blade? 😆

watched "run fatboy run" last night and wondered the same thing.

does self-raising work or does it have to be talc?

Would using Self Raising Flour have the same absorbancy and also lead to 'enhancement' to the trouser snake?

EDIT: damn!!!! too late

mmmmm some other ideas:

hot chocolate powder
custard powder
icing sugar

[i]icing sugar[/i]

Might want to rethink that one. Talc [i]prevents[/i] stickiness...

Self Raising Flour

mmmm yeasty 😯

What about climbers chalk? It even comes in a handy package called a chalk ball or a nadz?

Anyway. This is a serious question for which I hoped for serious answers. The usual suspects just come and reduce it to playground drivel in less than ten posts.

*shakes head* I don't know...

dip your knackers in the dyson blade?

I don't think anyone would really be wanting to use the hairdryer again, the gym does have Dyson Blades but I'd be too worried about rupturing something, have you soon what they do to your hands 😯

think about it though... wrinkle free after a couple of runs through the airblade!

oh and dez...

smelling of talc, or smelling of tasty wedding cake.... i know which one most ladies would prefer 😆

EDIT - would custard powder mean people could walk all over them and it form an instantly hardening protective custard shell?

*shakes head again*

Ask a mate to blow the sweat away from your balls. Would go down really well.

Just MTFU and give the area a blast with a good anti persipirant? There must be something you can spray on that would prevent the problem. Talc is for inner-tubes.

Its nice not having to peel it off my leg anymore

Jeez, someone just pass me the talc.
If I shake my head again it's going to look like I'm enjoying myself a little too much...

[i]blast with a good anti persipirant?[/i]

I use a roll-on..

Loving the image of a bloke in the gym... foot up on the bench liberally applying a roll on deoderant... or better still a stick deoderant...

I like a nice bit of "salt and pepper" around the old chap now and again. Not all the time mind just now and again. I tend to talc all over at the weekends. Mmmmmm silky smooth.

Edit. Bloody android key pad and auto correct.

[i]I tend to talk all over at the weekends. Mmmmmm silky smooth.[/i]

Funny how one slightly incorrect letter effects a sentence

There is a guy at my gym who stands infront of the mirror (in the changing room) with one foot on the bench whilst blasting his tackle with the hair drier.

I believe he is trying for this effect.

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I don't get it.

Surely talcing your man forest is simply going to make it look like some dandys wig from the French revolution?

However, if I were going to, I'd probably suggest coke. It'd certainly give a different meaning when dropping your trousers and looking a lady in the eye and saying "blow".....

Dr, I like you! I've been waiting for someone to make that comment. Your reward... fancy a line?

I often see blokes in the changing rooms emptying half a can of spray something, DDT maybe I dunno, all over their bodies just after a shower.

Wtf? Seriously, less is more. You just do not need that much. Are you really that insecure about your personal hygeine that you need to douse your clean self with a bucket of nasty chemicals? Think it's going to make everything ok maybe?

I bet the French would never consider talcing les ballons.

I simply wrap mine in good quality kitchen towel and dispose when suitably saturated.

Slightly off subject - is it quite common for us men to have a "longer" left stone?

*checks current moisture content of kitchen towel*

d_s... yes.

If they both hung at the same height things would be pretty uncomfortable!!

Is STW turning into Embarrassing Bodies..?

would custard powder mean people could walk all over them

I did that once, my OH accused me of trying to trifle with her affections.

ION,

Guy goes into a chemists, says "I'd like some deodorant please." Assistant asks, "do you want the ball type?" Guy replies, "nah, it's for under my arms."

Etc etc.

DezB - it'll be confidential... what's the problem?

Oh, where to start..

I knew someone who had a problem with a excessively droopy nut...he was advised to wear tight pants as he had some kind of problem.

I know no more than that, so can't tell you what the 'some kind of problem' was, or how droopy it is/was.

But I understand a certain amount of lopsided droopiness is to be expected.

Oh, in answer to the original question...I've never seen anyone using talc on their man-garden though, although some people do have a lot of beauty products for a man.

What is with blow drying your entire body? Don't you get too hot?

I use athletes foot powder personally, this helps fight Tinia Curis (Ringworm of the groin). I had a VERY bad case in 1989 which was made even worse by the treatment with Canestan. Turned out I was allergic to it so this made the complaint even worse. At one point I was having to use sanitary towels in my pants to absord the puss! Took aboyt 2 months to get under control and in the end this was achieved with an intramuscular injection every 2nd day for 2 weeks! I assume it was a steroid injection.

So I remain very prone to fungal infections in the trouser area and often have a recurrence (suffering from one now). Have to use Daktacort to treat it, so that is why if I can't shower or bathe after a ride I use anti fungal powder.

[i]Tinia Curis[/i]

I went out with her at school! Oh. Sorry. Read it as Tina Curtis.

Your reward... fancy a line?

Yes, but I'll be using a razor blade to make sure it's super fine first.

But then I guess I'd worry about the flacidity of the septum:scrotum interface. I'd hate to sniff in and give you a scrotal hernia by vacuuming up a few too many wrinkles.

CHA!

Chilli powder does the job just fine IME.

Have to use Daktacort to treat it,

Holy hell, there's a substance I'd erased from my memory. Back when I was a kid I had eczema on my feet (I think it was a reaction to the chemicals in the public swimming pool) and was given Daktacort to treat it. Dunno how effective it was, because it made it itch like an absolute motherhubbard, I couldn't stop scratching. I can't imagine it being something I'd want to put anywhere near my bits.

They swapped me over onto Synalar in the end, and it was a massive improvement.

😯

😆

TSY - I'm never going to be able to look you in the eye without s****ing. 😉

For having itchy feet?

I have a warning for all male STWers.

DO NOT apply Sudocrem to your bell end.

I have a friend who did (ahem) and it takes weeks to get it off.

You have been warned.

D_S

To do it properly you need a puff to apply it.

(As in a powder puff, what else would I mean 🙄 )

DO NOT apply Sudocrem to your bell end.

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C_G - I wouldn't worry about that... the main problem, it seems, is that I don't spend enough time looking people in the eyes 😯

Yeti, thank you for this, im very grumpy today and this has made me smile *hopes colleagues don't wonder why I'm looking at my phone and lol*

DirtyG... don't forget about the new religion! Salvation is just around the corner... talc'ing will not be compulsory!

I'd rather dip them under McMoonter's log splitter.

How could I forget *power hasnt quite gone to my head yet*. Can we also ban standing in front of the mirror flexing/admiring muscles, unless they are nice looking?

Blimey ... no.

😡

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I don't talk to them much, but they do all of my thinking.

oh... talc!

talc me up baby
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Guy goes into a chemists, says "I'd like some deodorant please." Assistant asks, "do you want the ball type?" Guy replies, "nah, it's for under my arms."

Bloke: "I'd like some deodorant please."

Assistant: "Certainly Sir, ball or aerosol?"

Bloke: "Neither, it's for my armpits."

Blimey - that is a [b]TOM[/b]cat.

Nads as big as jam donuts.

matt outandabout - in 1997 I had a lung condition that lowered my oxygen levels and made me go a bit mad. At the same time, I had really bad aches in my lower back and .........testicles.

In my "madness", I rubbed Ralgex liberally over the lads down there.

*winces at remembering the sensation*

chewkw... you against people putting talc on their magggots then?

DirtyG, the mirrored workout room will be reserved for those that can demonstrate a certain level of yogic ability.

Phil - how's the leg feeling today? You try tiger balm on it?

Try tiger balm, hmmm? 💡

Meanwhile, for those of us old enough to remember Not The 9 o'Clock News...

I'm old enough to remember it, but not old enough to have watched it at the time.

I shall however be adapting my joke forthwith, that's excellent.

leg, hips, lower back, right arm = still moving but painful
upper back (particularly the right side) and neck = seized up pretty badly... very limited range of movement.

still mobile though, still able to walk, talk and post lolcats....

broken cat is broken
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Meanwhile, for those of us old enough to remember Not The 9 o'Clock News...

I find it tastes bad so don't..........

Not up for the tingly lip sensation then sharki?

I get that anyway as i numb them first.
You've heard of the stranger...

Ralgex- followed by a hot shower to ease the situation only makes things worse!

DirtyG, the mirrored workout room will be reserved for those that can demonstrate a certain level of yogic ability

I was going to say it'll just be me and you in that room then, being as we're the smoking hot ones who also look good in lyrca doing yoga...but i have sinned today *hangs head in shame* I skipped my weights session as i was too tired from last weeks crash training. I sat in the park in the sun, people watching and then went for coffee instead. Can't remember the last time i skipped a session. I will make up for it tomorrow or wednesday by going for total press up fatigue with feet on the powerplate.

Double post

I just use a can of cyclist's deodorant

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