[Closed] Stupid names!

Couldn't agree more Loddrik.
(exception being if you had two girls, Cagney and Lacey would be perfectly acceptable 🙂 )

bless you for being so grumpy over something so silly, have you thought about having a nice cup of herbal tea and maybe doing some breathing exercises to keep calm. It can't be good for a man of your age.

I think the trend nowadays is to name them after your mums fave video game character

Mr Ryu Donkey Sonic Nutt

What business is it of yours what people call their children? Don't be such a snob.

I hadn't realised that chav was still the lower middle class IT manager's term for all those considered "below" him.
I haven't heard anyone actually say that term for several years.

It's just in case they win the poor persons tax (lottery).
so they'll be ready to fit right in with celebs 😉

You see this thread would be even funnier if Loddrik was your real name. Please tell me it is, go on, please.....

I think the whole naming your children thing takes place in some kind of alternative universe for most parents. It's as if there is some sort of temporary suspension of common sense, maybe it's the hormones, I don't know.

All I do know is that when we were expecting Ethan, for a brief period, I was absolutely convinced that 'Willoughby' was a great name for a boy and no amount of convulsive horror expressed by friends or family could shake my faith in that fact.

I haven't got the faintest, freakin idea what leave I took of my senses, but I am glad that I came round before we came to sit down in the registry office and declare him as Ethan James, rather than Willoughby James.

My wife happened to mention a girl that she'd dealt with at school, her name was......

....Alice Cooper! I 'proper LOLed'!!

In my teaching career I've also had the pleasure of knowing:

Fred Perry
Michael Caine
Michael Jackson
Jack Nicholson

i have a customer called david david.

Jaden is an old name.

[i]The name Jaden is a baby boy name. The name Jaden comes from the Hebrew origin. In Hebrew The meaning of the name Jaden is: Jehovah has heard. A Biblical name.[/i]

For sheer (lack of) class you can't beat Cantona. It sounds best when shouted in ASDA.

[b]Cantona, put that Tia Maria back on the ####ing shelf[/b]

We gave my son an unusual name. Call us chavs and we'll come round and stick a petrol bomb through your letterbox.

If i had a daughter I'd call her Clamydia. Sounds right posh. Not sure what it means, probably foreign or sommit. Our two pet Staffs are called Ronnie and Reggie.

This thread is now about terrorism.

Can someoene post a picture of Lacey Turner for me?

Thanks,

TSY

I Google Image searched Lacey Turner. No idea who they are but there seems to be 3 of them. Which one did you want?

The naughty cockney one off of Eastenders.

my youngest son is called Beech

when he's older i'll send him round to rob your house and rape your cat

Knew a family who called their daughter Princess Tiami. Apparently following the lead of some Z lister. There's also a Pocahontas McGinty in Govan. It's a pure sin furra wean so it is.

When considering a name for your newborn. Simply use the "tea" test. If the chosen name fits neatly in to "Haw (insert name; Charlene/Queen Lafita etc), come in and get yer tea", when shouted from an upstairs windae, then don't use it.

my children will be called "come here" and "go away", doesn't matter what sex they are.

actually i might suggest "winty Mac" then the poor sods name will be "Winty Mac Winterbottom".... oh the fun they'll have in school

yossarian - Member

my youngest son is called Beech

When he's older, he might provide you with a grandson... A Son Of A Beech.

(IGMC)

Came across a good one yesterday, Zsuzsanna. That's just adding random letters for the sake of it to try and look unique! It's just paving the way for a lifetime of repeating "No, 'Z' for zulu... etc" to incredulous call centre staff.

I had this conversation with an acquaintance that called her child "Daisey". What is the put on the extra E???

Can someoene post a picture of Lacey Turner for me?

There you go:

[img] [/img]

YAY! I love that girl. Would a rose by any other name be quite so hot!

Met her on holiday last year, and instantly said to my then girlfriend...

'we should have one of those celebs that it's acceptable for us to cheat with'

We split up shortly after the holiday.

She's my second favourite on UK TV after the lovely Jennifer Metcalfe in Hollyoaks!

We are choosing baby names at the mo for our impending arrival and some of the websites are full of stupid names. Most of the sites are American and they are known for stupid names so the chavs come along and look at these sites and thats that, Chardonnay leona princess talulla smith is created.

krystahl shandelleah is a good girls name.

OI Formica! leave little Le-A alone. Cricklewood stop fighting NOW!

Zsuzsanna - quite common in eastern Europe as a non-made-up non-weird name. You should spend more time outside your ghetto.

Watching my Godson (9 years old) playing football the other week and heard a parent shout

'For F*ck Sake Ronaldo, if you are going to fall over at least do it properly!'

I turned around to see a little ginger haired kid getting up off the ground.

My wife was at school with an Everhard (think thats the spelling) - his surname was Dick.

And his sister was Afelia...

Freakanomics had a chapter on the naming conventions of 'lower' America:

http://freakonomicsbook.com/freakonomics/chapter-excerpts/chapter-6/

There's a Latoya at my college. Which isn't so bad but the story goes that one of her lecturers called her Toyota. Poor girl , it sort of stuck.

It's hard not to laugh.

In my time working with kids, I've met a Chardonnay & a Stella, colleagues & I assumed it was the alcohol that had been involved at the moment of conception. Not exclusively but quite often younger parents/younger parent.

Also come across lots of "phonetic" spellings of more traditional names, for example Shevaun.

Good job Mrs MFL & I didn't follow that lead, otherwise Josh would have been known as Vodka Red Bull.

I went to school with Phil McCavity and Ivor Biggun.

Edit. I didn't really.

My two favourite names (after Lacey Turner) that are seemingly innocent until you abbreviate the christian name..

Michael Hunt.
Jennifer Taylor.

Much like downsheps tea test I decided you've got to go for a name you don't mind shouting in your own ([b]and[/b] the local one if you didn't grow up where you live) accent across morrisons - or indeed asda

Cantona, put that Tia Maria back on the ####ing shelf

Edit: and for goodness sakes make sure it doesnt sound ridiculous with your surname too.

Josh

Biblical names are what do it for me. Hate 'em. Obviously a late 20th/early 21st century name fashion victim. I predict free schools all over the country full of Jacobs, Noahs, Joshs, Aarons, Isaacs etc in a generation's time. Roll call will sound like someone's reading the bible.

I had to create a user account the other day for Dongdong Smith. I can only assume that's come from marriage, but what a great combination.

used to work with "Cherry-Pie Peters"

she was lovely 🙂

I know someone who has the joy of shouting britney, Paris, Chelsea come ere - she genuinely thinks they are classy names.

They do it so we can easily identify the lower classes - see also Tarquin, peregrine, Portia etc for the upper classes doing similiar
I once had to call and ask to speak to babar Bing

i have a customer called david david

I was once interviewed by Martin Martin

One of our PA's is called Airdreamer. Great name. My name, however has an odds ratio of 4 for being in prison 🙄

There's a Hungarian guy at our place called Zoltan - bloody great name!

Guy once applied for a job with me, name of Tyrone S. Love. I decided that if the middle name was Sweet, he could have a job, no interview or owt, just to answer the 'phone and give his name.

Turned out it was Stephen.

Hope he found employment somewhere.....

Someone asked me about my "funny made-up name" the other day. My name is Tobias, which I think is in the old testament.

I'm told by one of my school teacher friends that they saw this as the correct spelling of one of the kids in her class.

Le-a

(Le'dash'a) 🙄

I called b*llsh*t, but she swears it's true.

Biblical names are what do it for me. Hate 'em.

You wouldn't enjoy it here then, more Jesúses (or should that be Jesi?) than you can shake a stick at.

A fair smattering of Purificaciónes, Inmacaladas and Concepciónes!

EDIT: Better add that my name translates into "sump" from Spanish, so it works both ways. 😆

I have no idea what she sang like, but the very idea of one of the X Factor contestants being called Treyc was enough to confirm that I'll never watch that show even on pain of death.

Took me several readings of the name to realise what the pronunciation was supposed to be.

Caught a microsecond of "River City" last night, one of the kids is called "Madonna" laughed all night over that one.

Guy from Papua New Guinea used to come in the Uni library I worked in in NZ called John Thomas. Was quite easy not to laugh when he came up to the desk, very big and scary looking. We also had a Richard Head on the users directory.

An acquaintance of mine has called his son Aaron but spells it Airwren as he says his son is the air he breathes and the wren is his favourite free spirit bird...I think he may use a lot of illicit substances!

Heard in the high street 'Tia! Tia! Tia-Maria you bloody come here now!'

My vets' son is called Hugh. His surname is Cumber!
I also know of a Cherry Bush!

+1 for the tea test

This is absolutely true.

The brother of a friend of mine is one of those (stupid) Man Utd fans and idolised Eric Cantona in his days at Old Trafford.

Anyway - his girlfriend got pregnant and they decided that if they had a boy they would call it Eric.

This plan was scuppered when a little baby girl arrived so....what did they call her? Erica perhaps?

No.

They called her Cantonia.

Incroyable.

Was Jethro Tull's wife called Jenny?

IGMC 😀

At various times in the army, my dad met a Captain Courage and a Sergeant Slaughter. 2000AD-tastic!

I wanted to call my first son Buster. My wife was having none of it.

She said if we get a dog I can call it Buster instead...

BH - I met a General Courage - depending how old your father is may be the same chap - he was a descendant of the Reading brewing family. With whom did your father serve?

There's a Hungarian guy at our place called Zoltan

Re biblical names, my mate married a Sarah, who has sisters Emma and Rebecca and a brother called Matthew !

I know a Willam Cock and one of his middle names is Richard.

I know of a Zepharina.

we have had an italian at work called marco ferrari. how cool

I present the motoring correspondent on BBC Radio Gloucestershire, [url= http://www.bbc.co.uk/gloucestershire/content/articles/2005/05/12/who_is_zog_feature.shtml ]Zog Ziegler[/url]!

Chlamydia

That's a good girls name 🙂

My mate works with a Keaton Keaton, affectionately known as Keaton squared.
I myself worked with a nice lad called Christian Leader.

Zepharina:

my sister went to school with Mr & Mrs Gentle's daughter. Name of Carmen. I kid you not

mefty - Member
BH - I met a General Courage - depending how old your father is may be the same chap - he was a descendant of the Reading brewing family. With whom did your father serve?

He's 61 now and retired in 2003, so he'd have been 53 at the time.

Served with the RTR, retiring as a Brigadier.

My guess the guy i met is a bit older, probably 70 now.

Was Jethro Tull's wife called Jenny?

No he married Susannah Smith

Twin Girls will be arriving in the UncleFred household in a couple of weeks. I want Pixie and Trixie but the wife won't have it...

I was at School with a guy called Fred Braid, we called him toastie! Ha ha. Not really.

I know a Mr C Lyon tho. I have got him a few times with "this guy phoned for you, just phone this number (local sea life centre) and say who u are"

I like Mr G Raff aswell.

My missus works in a shop and has heard of a Troy, Pocahontas, Porsche -Lea...wait for the posh surname! Brown! Ha ha. A Bunty, Tellulah and a Boris!

Oh dear.

Where I work, I know of a Dr. James Mason & Dr. Rong Dong 😀

I have taught Bubbles St Clair - true name

and last year worked in an office next to Neal Thunderchief head

When my uncle lived in the states in the 60's he had a mate who was native American. His name was George Standingatthedoor (honestly). Something to do with native Americans having names which reflected things that happened when they were born.

In the NZ news recently.
Someone had named their kid 'ASDF'

Fast to type, unpronouncable.

Come across loads on my courier duties..best one of late; Eardley Gear.
Pretty cool.

[url= http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/7522952.stm ]here[/url]

Earl- similar thing in NZ, someone named their twins.... Benson and Hedges.

Once knew a girl called Randy.
Been with a lass called Velvet.
Brother met a guy called Versace McKlatchey

🙂

The Para's had a Major Pine-Coffin

Also Drew's not funny if your last name is Peacock

I don't know if it's only me but whenever Fenella Fudge reads the news I damn near piss me pants

I remember hearing an interview on BBC radio with a British Army Brigadier, Jolyon Jackson great name!

When I were a nipper I remember clearly the last man in the NI phone book was Zebedee Zzyp.