.. "none of you bastards touch my easter eggs, ill be back on sunday!"
Made me chuckle.
Depends whether they used Jewsons nails or not.... 😉
8)
Do you reckon that a modern day crucifixion would still result in stigmata, or do you think it'd be gotten rid of through the use of No More Nails?
Thought it was going to be the good old "I can see your house from here"
I can see the pub from here
I'm fed up with being hammered by tacks(tax)
"Hell of a way to spend a Friday night, but you get a
great view of Jerusalem from up here"
"Okay guys you win i'll stop doing the wine trick and buy a round like everyone else"
This kind of talk reminds me of the Billy Connolly gag,
Jesus walks in on the last supper, and the disciples are all eating a Chinese takeaway...
"Whats all this?" he asks
John replies " ahh, Judas decided to treat us all, he seems to have come into a bit of money..."
( I'd just like to get the apologies in , but I do have some very devout relatives who see the black humour in that one too)
Not funny
Why is that not funny?
WK, that's just great!
Nah, even I regret posting that one the minute I hit send, 'though it has been on tv a couple of times, so I thought the offense may be less,
Sorry again.
For phoenix
[img] 
[/img]
Always look on the bright side of death...
Just before you draw your terminal breath...
'cos life's a piece of shit
When you look at it
etc
"Ow!"
I seem to remember that people mocked Him then also.
The saddest part is He died just for people like you except you don't realise it ...yet.
I'll remember to mention you in my prayers.
🙂 Happy Easter
I seem to remember that people mocked Him then also.
old ba$tard
So Jesus said to his disciples as he was nailed to the cross
"go on then , where the **** is Jeremy Beadle?"
To the casual observer, the two aspects of Easter seem somewhat incongruous. On the one hand is the secular holiday, where children hunt for brightly colored eggs in the grass and receive candy and toys in baskets brought by an anthropomorphic rabbit. On the other hand is the religious observance, where the Christian faithful mark the miraculous resurrection of their savior. While the two sides seem to have nothing at all in common, they begin to make greater sense when one considers the pagan roots of the holiday.
Fertility Goddesses
The word Easter itself is likely derived from Eostre, the Saxon mother goddess, whose name in turn was adapted from Eastre, an ancient word for spring. The Norse equivalent of Eostre was the goddess Ostara, whose symbols were an egg and a hare, both denoting fertility. Festivals honoring these goddesses were celebrated on or around the vernal equinox, and even today, when Easter has supposedly been Christianized, the date of the holiday falls according to rather pagan reckonings, i.e. on the Sunday following the first full moon after the vernal equinox.
Bunnies, Eggs and Lilies
Rabbits, of course, are a potent symbol of fertility due to their prodigious output of young. Eggs, likewise, have always been considered representative of new life, fertility, and reincarnation. Painted eggs, thought to imitate the bright sunlight and gaily colored flowers of spring, have been used in rituals since the days of the ancient Egyptians and Babylonians. Lilies were also seen as fertility symbols because of their perceived resemblance to male genitalia. Even hot cross buns, associated with Lent, derive from the ancient Greeks and Romans, who baked “magic” wheat cakes with crosses scored in the top; two of these cakes were discovered in the ruins of Herculaneum, which was destroyed by the eruption of Vesuvius in 79 CE.
Roots of Resurrection
The pagan celebrations most associated with modern Christian practices derive from Mediterranean cultures. The Phrygians celebrated a spring festival honoring Cybele, a fertility goddess. Cybele had a consort god named Attis, who was born of a virgin, and who died and was resurrected after three days, an occurrence commemorated sometime around the vernal equinox. Worshippers of Attis mourned the god’s death on Black Friday, then celebrated his rebirth on the following Sunday.
Attis was simply the latest manifestation of earlier resurrection myths, like those of Osiris, Orpheus, Tammuz and Dionysus, who were likewise said to have been born of virgins and resurrected three days after their deaths. In areas where Christian beliefs later took hold, these already existing tales were grafted onto the story of Jesus Christ, and continue to be retold to this day. It seems that ever since the dawn of civilization, ancient peoples have always associated spring with rebirth and resurrection, with nature’s reawakening after the “death” of barren winter, and have further embodied the concept in the person of a god or goddess.
Read more at Suite101: The Pagan Origins of Easter: Pre-Christian Rituals Form the Basis for Modern Celebrations
tazzymtb - part of what you write is correct, however, the evidence for Jesus's life, death and resurrection is overwhelming, historically as well as Biblically. It's whether you choose to believe He is the Son of God which is the real question - and that relies on faith, repentance and revelation.
The whole Easter event is about God's love for all of us.
Can you explain why christianity didn't come to our shores until 600 years after his death?
I won't argue on your special weekend about people coming back from the dead, have a jolly time, with your bearded zombie resurrection flesh eater.
😉
tyger, what 'overwhelming historical evidence' is there of his resurrection?
shhhhhhh, don't upset him or the easter bunny won't bring nice pagan chocolate fertility eggs
Isn't it depressing that we are, as a species still a bunch of dumb superstitious monkeys, that will believe any old bollox
Isn't it depressing that we are, as a species still a bunch of dumb superstitious monkeys, that will believe any old bollox
i don't
😀
wors - MemberCan you explain why christianity didn't come to our shores until 600 years after his death?
The French ports were blocked by angry lorry drivers?
The French ports were blocked by angry lorry drivers?
😆 😆
wors - Member
Can you explain why christianity didn't come to our shores until 600 years after his death?
[invitation to bu11sh1t brigade to shoot their mouths off]
Not that it matters in any way as far as I can see, but Christianity was in Britain as early as the first half of the third century, and no later than the early fourth.
****ing he11, they need to instate history as an educational requisite in this country.
The biggest problem with every one of these anti-religion threads that appear on this forum like a cancer, is how woefully uninformed they are.
People strike out on here like Mexican children with piñata sticks on their birthday, blindly swinging and not caring who or what they hit. Come on. If you're really interested in challenging the status of historic religion, then take an OU class or two, and start dealing with what [i]is[/i] instead of what you [i]think is[/i].
[/invitation to bu11sh1t brigade to shoot their mouths off]
[invitation to saxonrider to put toys back in pram]
calm down dear it's only a bike forum
[invitation to saxonrider to put toys back in pram]
Not that it matters in any way as far as I can see, but Christianity was in Britain as early as the first half of the third century, and no later than the early fourth.
okay then it wasnt until around 600ad that it was taken serious, before then the people of Britain thought it was bolox
[i] the evidence for Jesus's life, death and resurrection is overwhelming, historically[/i]
really? as far as I remember, the Romans (who ruled what they called Judaea at the time) didn't say too much about him. Now, considering how anal they were about writing down [i]everything[/i] so much as how many sacks of grain every small farmer sold at his local market, there are 2 possible answers to this:
1) he never existed
2) he was such a thorn in their sides they had to hush it all up
your choice folks.
While I'm open to the idea that there may or may not have been a preacher around at the time who annoyed the local powers somewhat, "son of god"?
people of Britain thought it was bolox
some still do 😉
I might start a thread about evolution!
noooo it'll set the creationists off who will tell you that Mary went to bethlehem on the back of a triceretops!
It's just another reason for supermarkets to make a load of cash. shopping holliday. Who went shopping today?
Having been a bad boy with my earlier contibution, and despite being in the hardcore sceptics club, I also dont really like the mocking tone of some of the religion threads. 😳
I suspect that the bad things about religion are best challenged with a degree of respect and cold reason.
So I'll spare you my other joke about Siddharta Gautama...
west kipper - Member
Having been a bad boy with my earlier contibution, and despite being in the hardcore sceptics club, I also dont really like the mocking tone of some of the religion threads.
I suspect that the bad things about religion are best challenged with a degree of respect and cold reason.
I genuinely thank you for that, west kipper. You imply that there is a distinction between 'respect and cold reason' and mocking on an internet forum, and it is only the latter that I really have any problem with.
Everyone should be able to engage in an exploration of/discussion on/critique of religion. That's what religious studies departments and pubs are for. I simply contend that there is an unbridgeable chasm between what most often happens on here, and what ideally happens in those places.
Religion is a form of mental illness.
Trying to discuss religion with someone who's got an invisible friend is like trying to plan a picnic with an anorexic agoraphobic.
It's easier just to point and laugh.
[i]I suspect that the bad things about religion are best challenged with a degree of respect and cold reason.[/i]
Count on it.
Time for Jesus to be brought up to date...
[img] 
[/img]
...and sent to the Vatican to sort out the sith pope and his cohorts for once and for all...
GET SOME!!
Religion is a form of mental illness.
And perhaps ignorance, narrow-mindedness and bigotry are symptoms of an under-developed mind... 🙄
Curious, as to why, if all the non-religious types are sooo secure in their infidelity, that they constantly feel the need to mock others...
Live and let live, eh folks?
I'm saying nowt
Defending religion by accusing someone who opposes it it of "ignorance, narrow-mindedness and bigotry".
Oh, the irony.
The absence of a sense of humour in religious types is the root cause of so many of the problems that humans face.
How many wars have a huge religious motivation behind them? Our current conflicts do, WW2 did etc....
"The absence of a sense of humour in religious types is the root "
"Oh, the irony"
Can you explain why christianity didn't come to our shores until 600 years after his death?
No internet back then
Can you explain to me the "religious motivation " of WWI and WWII?
I was about to say that. I'm not religous in any sense and find the whole thing a bit ridiculous, but to say all wars are caused by religon is quite frankly bollox.
Mind you, imo enough of them are that I personally consider religon in some of it's guises to be throughlly distastefull. The trouble is, there is always going to be extremism in any form of human activity, and it doesn't make all elements of it inherently evil. Islam - Fundementalist Islam. Mountain bikin - Singlespeed 29ers. One and the same... 😉 Religion in of itself isn't the issue. Live and let live... It's extreme fundementalism, in any guise, that is the issue.
Buzzlightyear and tree-magnet, nice attempt at putting words in my mouth. Go back to the remedial class and learn to read please.
Why people want to start threads like these is beyond me. I'll just put it down to a combination of low morals and lack of intelligence.
phoenix from the flame - Member
How many wars have a huge religious motivation behind them? Our current conflicts do, WW2 did etc....
Buzzlightyear - Member
Can you explain to me the "religious motivation " of WWI and WWII?
.phoenix from the flame - Member
Buzzlightyear and tree-magnet, nice attempt at putting words in my mouth. Go back to the remedial class and learn to read please
Is it just me who's confused ?
mudsux, we have this thing called humour and these things called jokes, we also have this thing called laughter. Often this laughter is about humorous jokes about fairy stories.
Jeepers - get a sense of humour.
MG: Nope, me too mate.
PFTF: Grow up please.
MilitantGraham - MemberReligion is a form of mental illness.
Trying to discuss religion with someone who's got an invisible friend is like trying to plan a picnic with an anorexic agoraphobic.
It's easier just to point and laugh.
Personally, I would be more worried about the mental health of someone who feels the need to point and laugh at how other people choose to live their lives.
Many people live their lives in all manner of ways which quite frankly baffles me. And yet, I am perfectly happy to let them get on with it............ It is after all [i]their[/i] lives, not [i]mine.[/i]
Rather than having these constant new threads on religion everyday, I reckon Mark should designate one religious thread as a sticky. Like that, the busybody anti-god botherers could satisfy their infantile daily urges, and shore up their confidence in the face of their own obvious insecurities.
💡
Hi! 😉
mudsux, we have this thing called humour and these things called jokes, we also have this thing called laughter. Often this laughter is about humorous jokes about fairy stories.
I'll assume you've a low intelligence then.
I am not too worried about having my intelligence levels questioned by someone who chooses to call themselves mudsux.
I am not too worried about having my intelligence levels questioned by anyone. I'm in Mensa. 😛
tyger - MemberI seem to remember that people mocked Him then also.
The saddest part is He died just for people like you except you don't realise it ...yet.
I'll remember to mention you in my prayers.
There is no evidence to suppose that any of the events portrayed in the "gospels" ever took place and are anything more than a set of fictions.
Even supposing (for the sake of argument) that this is NOT the case, and this "Jesus" had himself nailed up "for me" over 2 thousand years before I was even born,then frankly, he must have been a complete lunatic who did so without even asking my permission. Which he could have done, being magic and all, even though I didn't yet exist. Presumably. How rude. I would certainly have told him not to bother, and save himself a lot of unneccessary suffering, silly man.
Prayer: how to do nothing and think you're still helping.
Mr Woppit. Not being "attack-y or aggressive" or anything...
It's not about fact or fiction.
Threads like this [i]always[/i] seem to rub some people up the wrong way.
End of.
I think some of us go a wee bit too far as a kind of release, a way of pettily getting our own back for years of indoctrination.
I remember resenting the religious aspects of school massively, despite not going to a faith school, just a regular council primary.
I still feel a bit angry about that bias , and being in trouble for questioning and doubting, even all these years later.
Defending religion by accusing someone who opposes it it of "ignorance, narrow-mindedness and bigotry".
Oh, the irony.
Where was I 'defending' religion?
I stand by my comments. Yours are obviously just an attempt to try and make yourself appear 'clever'. Member of Mensa? I solved loads of their 'are you clever enough to join Mensa' puzzles when I was in Primary School. Big deal.
By comparing being religious to having a 'mental illness' shows your woeful ignorance of what mental illness really is. And your deep prejudice and fear of anything you don't 'get'. People are different to you, you know. They might have different ideas, philosophies and beliefs. Ever considered that?
Or maybe you're just too clever to have to? 🙄
Temporal Lobe Epilepsy, Neurotheology and Paranormal Experience
The first researcher to note and catalog the abnormal experiences associated with TLE was neurologist Norman Geschwind, who noted a constellation of symptoms, including hypergraphia, [i]hyperreligiosity[/i], fainting spells, and pedantism, often collectively ascribed to a condition known as Geschwind syndrome.
Vilayanur S. Ramachandran explored the neural basis of the [i]hyperreligiosity[/i] seen in TLE using galvanic skin response (which correlates with emotional arousal) to determine whether the [i]hyperreligiosity[/i] seen in TLE was due to an overall heightened emotional state or was specific to [i]religious stimuli[/i] (Ramachandran and Blakeslee, 1998). By presenting subjects with neutral, sexually arousing and [i]religious words[/i] while measuring GSR, Ramachandran was able to show that patients with TLE showed enhanced emotional responses to the [i]religious words[/i], diminished responses to the sexually charged words, and normal responses to the neutral words. These results suggest that the medial temporal lobe is specifically involved in generating some of the emotional reactions associated with [i]religious words, images and symbols[/i].
UFO Researcher Albert Budden and cognitive neuroscience researcher Michael Persinger assert that stimulating the temporal lobe electromagnetically can cause TLE and trigger [i]hallucinations of apparent paranormal phenomena such as ghosts[/i] and UFOs. Persinger has even created a "God helmet" which purportedly can evoke altered states of consciousness through stimulation of the parietal and temporal lobes.
My italics.
Right, and? 🙄
And your point is what?
The above example is a possible explanation for the extremes of religious experience, but not for the quiet day-to-day faith of many people.
It may be, that there is a series of genes that give a spiritual need in humans, ones that help to build unified social behaviour. Studies with identical twins suggest this quite strongly.
Equally there may be genes that govern NON-belief too.
That means that you are what you are- a religious persons belief is not necessarily because they're stupid, but because they have it hardwired into their makeup.
And those of us that have no belief, cant help it either, we're not smarter, just programmed that way.
Many people live their lives in all manner of ways which quite frankly baffles me. And yet, I am perfectly happy to let them get on with it............ It is after all their lives, not mine.
+1. Except, they want your lives to be like theirs. That's what religion does.
phoenix from the flame - MemberAnd your point is what?
The "religious experience" is a result of brain malfunction, not proof of ghostly or godly presences.
Paul on the road to damascus, for instance.
The "religious experience" is a result of brain malfunction
'Malfunction'? In what sense?
I've had some pretty mindblowing experiences on acid. I certainly wouldn't say my brain was 'malfunctioning'. Far, far from it.
What does "hyper-" as a prefix mean?
how is having a go a people for their core beliefs any diffrent from slagging off fudgepackers? oh sorry i meant gay people, or coloureds?opps so sorry i meant diffrent ethnic groups?,
just seems to be a trend against people who hold beliefs but the min anyone says anything on here even in jest about anything like homosexuals/racist issues etc etc ,the mods pull it and the stw massif start waxing lyrical about being in the 21st century and accusing people of bigotry etc,
just really wondering why?,is religious hate crime any better than rascism or homophobia??
Where does Tom Cruise fit in to all of this............................ 😳
These results suggest that the medial temporal lobe is specifically involved in generating some of the emotional reactions associated with religious words, images and symbols.
Most of the emotional reactions on STW associated with "religious words, images and symbols" seem to come from professing atheists.
Does TLE cause atheism?
I think we should be told.
Where does Tom Cruise fit in to all of this
He's very very small, so he could probably fit into a tiny corner somewhere.
That's sizeist and will not be tolerated in my thread. 🙁