I'll kick off with people who describe short fluffy lightweight experiences in their lives as being "a journey".
People who diss other's life experiences cos they think they know it all.
NEXT!
People who use the word "next" to indicate the discussion is over.
'My Bad'.
Your bad what? Back? Toe? What?
'Swap out'. Oh, let's add another completely unnecessary word.
Props.
People who go onto threads where they have no interest in a subject, or it's not about [i]them[/i], and just post 'WGAF?' Why bother wasting the time to post that then you knobber!
At this moment in time
like
sweet
rad
People who take internet forums too seriously.
People who take internet forums too seriously.
That's not really a saying or cliche now is it 😉
People who get too serious about people taking internet forums too seriously.
Like
End of the day
Basically
Stoked
DARKSIDE - users saying this should be banned.
Chapeau
Very unique
Rad
People who forget that cliché has an accent.
"pulls up a chair"
This fred is full of win.
He lives in a pineapple under the sea, cut him some slack!
And has a pet snail.
"To be honest" - what, you mean you're not the rest of the time?
"Going forward, we will..." - that's generally how time moves - forwards. Also, use of the future tense tends to indicate you are talking about things that are going to happen.
Realboy it's a total cliche.
here:
hive mind
dark side
there:
"put my pants back on the line. If I see you here again, I'm calling the police !"
I don't wish to be rude' but............
In my humble opinion..........
Will you swap it for an xbox and a bmx......
"I'm not being funny, but"! 😆
"you get what you pay for"
"Take a different tact". It's tack you moron! "different tact" means nothing at all. And ironically it's almost always said by people who're being really tactless.
I love it.
"Take a different tact".
you just made that up, no one would be silly enough to say it 🙂
Oh I wish that was true
using the word BIG
i.e is that a set of BIG 203 rotors on there
no they are just the standard 203 if they were big 203 they would not be called 203`s
meh
Oh I wish that was true
were true
"Awesome"
When talking about things like mobile phones or bicycle forks
Erupting volcanoes can be awesome but surely not a mobile phone?
"we are where we are"
A favourite one of a former boss.
I really dislike the use of the word 'run' when you really mean 'have fitted on my bicycle'. You 'run' a business, a market stall, a youth five-a-side football team or half a dozen huskies. Not a piece of overpriced machined aluminum.
Gok Wan when he says,
'go girlfriend'
'stop it already'
we are where we are
Oi, I use that one! Can you suggest me an alternative way of expressing resignation that despite the fact you wouldn't have done it that way in the first place, you just have to get on with fixing what you have because there is no alternative?
Gok Wan
Fixed that for you. 🙂
Any perfectly normal phrase that is turned into business speak to make the speaker sound like they know what they're talking about or more important than they are.
Back in the day
Aracer, I'd say "f*ck it, we screwed up, now let's fix it" 😉
It's just a phrase that annoyed me in a stating the obvious kind of way.
"get out of our meat counter before we call the police"
Nah, Scardeypants did it already, and better MrNutt. Your one was a pathetic, weak attempt. Bit like your riding.
"Rad" - unless it refers to a radiator, and even that's debateable.
"Off" - as in "Tinners was pedalling at walking pace along the bridleway in perfect conditions when he had a nasty off" - "**** off" I can understand, but "nasty off", "big off", etc make no sense to me at all.
Unconventionally spelt names e.g. Lynda and Walliams, lovely though they are, because I always get the spelling wrong.
Names that can be pronounced a variety of ways e.g. Aaron (lovely name, but is it "Air-on" or "Arghh-on"), mainly because I always get the pronounciation wrong
Surnames with a "z" where you don't expect it e.g. Gzbowska, again, lovely in themselves, but for the sheer inevitibility of either causing offence or looking foolish or both when trying to pronounce them.
"Bad" - see above, as in "my bad". Your bad what? Grammar?
"Niche" - as in "That bow tie and toupe combo, Mr Tinners, is very niche"
"For my sins" - having invariably described something that is about as sinful as picking daisies.
"My better half" - only because it's usually accurate
"Nom, nom" - unless said by somebody who genuinely leaves their dentures out and pinches their nostils whilst eating sticky food.
"So" as a means of gauging a unit of measurement - as in "It was so high and about so wide" (usually accompanied by a "pincer" or "arms held far apart" gesture)
"So" - as in "I'm so over him/That's so 1990". Usually accompanies a "like" e.g. "Thats so, like, 2009"
"One" - unless it refers to a number and not oneself.
"Lush" - unless it refers to dense green vegetation
"Strength in depth" - because no rugby commentator can go 5 minutes without saying it
"Old age doesn't come alone" because whoever says it thinks they're the first to have said it.
"Hubby" - You'll never hear a bloke refer to himself as that, unless the wife wears the trousers in that relationship, if you know what I mean. (However, fascinatingly, if the wife uses the term "Hubby" then it often indicates a relationship of "his n hers" things where they both wear identical brands and styles that only differ in colour - e.g. both wear matching cardigans/walking boots/MTBs/lederhosen/golfing apparel etc, but his is in blue, hers is in pink - am I the only one to notice that? It's a practice that's popular in the over 60s and often sighted in the Lake District).
"Nipple" when used to describe anything other than the ends of ladies boobs. As in "Have you tried pulling on the nipples, Mr Tinners, before you release the grub flange holding the stanchion bracket on to the pawlgrips?".
"Pawls/stanchions" - because I don't know what they are, what they do, how expensive they are to fix and they sound like words that have been made up just to confuse me.
"Her/She" when used to describe a mechanical object. As in "She'll run a lot more smoothly after you've lubed her up" (said pointing to a bike/car/tractor)
"In the zone" when used to describe a rider who isn't riding along a designated area (Disabled/Mothers and toddles/No parking) marked out with yellow cross hatched chevrons. As in "Tinners was riding like a God along the singletrack switchback and breaking all records because he was in the zone".
I could go on.
"with the greatest of respect"
Because people saying it usually mean the exact opposite
"Super" as an adjective for everything, usually by irritating surfer types - super stoked, super gnarly, super clean, super messy etc.
Team building. Team player. Team my arse ... if there is nothing in return for you.
😈
Uni instead of University
Another one for "back in the day".
What f***ing day?!? How does that "day" stand out from all other days? If there were a phrase I would invoke the death penalty for it would be "back in the day."
