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One thing that hasn't been said here is apologise when you are wrong. If you lose your temper and shout when you shouldn't have, take the time to apologise for it and explain in an age appropriate way why what you did was wrong. Otherwise you risk him learning that taking out his frustrations on others is ok.
It's not always easy, but apologising often isnt!
Read raising boys by Steve Biddulph.
I was in a similar situation its pretty much sorted now 🙂
Yes, always apologise for losing your rag. You'd do it to anyone else of course.
My boy has been playing up lately , I just lock him in in the shed.
😉
(and this is the bit I hesitate to write) I can see me and my dads relationship forming in me and my boy (I hate my dad, always have done). Thing is, I can now kind of see where he was coming from, but the thought of CJ thinking of me what I did of my dad is heart breaking
parenthood shows you straight away, if you are prepared to look, things about your own childhood that you may have forgotten...try to remember that your parents where in exactly the same position you are now, possibly thinking exactly the same things. no one gave them an instruction manual either, they/you just do your best...parenthood is a way of forgiving your own parents for the sh1t things they did, and trying to do a little better. remember you love your kids and your wife, and you're only here once...
email in profile if you any where near west yorks
One thing that hasn't been said here is apologise when you are wrong. If you lose your temper and shout when you shouldn't have, take the time to apologise for it and explain in an age appropriate way why what you did was wrong. Otherwise you risk him learning that taking out his frustrations on others is ok.
This is a great point.
Also, Mrs Guru (who has always been wise beyond her years) is a great believer in saying things like "I understand that you're upset/angry/etc" because it's important to place value on the child's emotions (even when you think they're being silly/soft/unreasonable/etc) and then talk about what will help them feel better about that.
I think one on one time is very valuable - it's not always that easy in modern life but I think it's worth finding ways to achieve it on a regular basis.