[Closed] Quick fire jokes to text

Hoping he will get fed up, turn his phone off and actually learn something.

Or block your number

How about.....

"I'm not putting anymore credit on your phone until you start taking school a bit more seriously"

or

"I'm cancelling your phone contract because you're pissing about at school"

Why did the baker have brown fingers?

He was kneading a jobbie.

https://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/crap-joke-friday/

And of course, STW answer: take his phone off him before he goes to school.  If he absolutely needs a phone at school (why?), I've a Nokia 3310 here.

I’ve a Nokia 3310 here.

Deedle-ee-dee,Deedle-ee-dee,Deedle-ee-dee-deeeeee

Yeah I suggest stoppping him from taking is phone to school.

‘Did you hear the one about the kid who got his phone taken off him for pissing about at school?’

So the son jokes around all day at school using a phone, and his Dad thinks the solution is to send him jokes....

"What do you call an 18 year old with no GCSE's wearing a suit?

The Accused"

"What do you say to an 18 year old with no CGCSE's and a job?

Big Mac and large fries please"

"What did the 18 year old with no GCSE's say to the pretty girl in the street?

Big Issue? "

“What do you say to an 18 year old with no GCSE’s?

Should have put your phone down while at school.

“What do you say to an 18 year old with no GCSE’s?

Don't forget to write your blood type on the form and pick up your cammo gear in the corner private cannon fodder

Cat facts sub?

Keep reminding him that you've ****ed his mum.

“What do you say to an 18 year old with no GCSE’s?

If you'd done GCSEs you'd know how to use a ****ing apostrophe!

I have already started, what suggestions have you got?

After I'd leathered my child for pissing about in class, I'd put a rocket up the school high heid yin and get the phones banned. No need for them in the classroom at all.

My kid gets annoyed by one thing in texts from me - if I include an emoji 🙂 I'd never do that to annoy him, of course 😀  😉

Upon confirmation from the school, he was out for an early lunch so not in a lesson. Although the school policy is no phones during school times. They were very interested to hear what i said about being allowed to use phones in school by certain teachers, i get the feeling the head is going to have some strong words after my discussion with her.

This is the 6th time i have been put in this position by him using his phone in school. Apparently my way of dealing with it is a bit harsh, but after reading your replies i don't think i am.

First time, serious talking to about education etc. Second time, warning he would lose his phone. Third time he lost his phone for a week. Fourth time lost it for 2 weeks. Fifth time lost his phone for a month. After that, he had the most basic phone we could find which he had for another month, then he had his phone back.

We live 3 miles from the school and he hasn't got a school bus space. He either walks, catches bus half way and walk, or lately been riding his bike. The phone is a way of getting hold of us or us getting hild of him if there is a problem.

I think if it happens again i will personally take him to trade it in and give him the basic phone back and that will be the end of it. My intention was not to humour him, but to send a load of texts to annoy him to the point he had enough of it and he would switch it off. I had started by sending the alphabet to him one letter at a time but was getting bored of that hence the jokes angle.

Thanks for the replies, i think they confirmed i am not being too harsh.

being harsh would be removing his thumbs.

start with just his little finger.

Humiliation is your most powerful weapon.

Whenever you see him with his friends, dance.

Also, would his mum be amenable to blatantly flirting with his friends?

you're not being harsh, you're doing him a favour long term.

phones are marvellous devices, but their use needs to be reigned in, and not just by kids.

you’re not being harsh, you’re doing him a favour long term.

phones are marvellous devices, but their use needs to be reigned in, and not just by kids.

Sent from my iPhone

Out of interest, how do you know he's using it in school?  Are the teachers telling you?

My intention was not to humour him, but to send a load of texts to annoy him to the point he had enough of it and he would switch it off.

Or just laugh at your inferior technical knowledge and block your texts whilst continuing to dick about on his phone.

Funkmaster,

naturally!!

Just drop him off and pick him up each day. Remember to give him a great big hug each time.