[Closed] Peer pressure - mentally healthier to resist?

Erm, did you mean to direct that to someone?

Which body part have you just had tattooed or pierced then?

Lighten up, have a beer

May help someone:

https://www.skillsyouneed.com/ips/peer-resistance.html

"It is important to stress that there may not be a ‘right’ and ‘wrong’ in absolute terms. It is about what is right for you."

You've bought a fat bike haven't you?

Just say no. 😉

Did you put your car keys in the bowl?

Deep. I'm so far past caring about pleasing my peers.

Watched an episode of the Apprentice?

Why do something you're not comfortable with and furthermore that costs you money to do it?

Is this about the coffee machine?

Just because your friend has one doesn't mean you have to buy one.

Be strong.

Stag do?

Be glad you have friends, there are a lot of lonely people in this world.

Stag do?

Stag don't!

Be strong.

Just say no.

have a beer

Thanks, but I'm on the wagon, although it is time for my pre GoT cup of tea...

Not an issue about me, I've dealt with a lot of my indecisive but fronting up to these issues. But the more I fix me, the more I see it elsewhere.

Jamie - Member

Stag do?

Stag don't!

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You can wear your shirt untucked with jeans, even if you're over 40. Don't give in to the fashionista bastards

Careful now funkmasterp, that kind of thinking put Bearnecessities in the Flasheart club recently...

Sounds like you need to grow a pair of trousers.

Once went out on a works night out, nice curry restaurant. They misplaced our booking so we had to have a drink in the bar area and wait for a table, fine really, i like a beer. Then we ended up on a crappy table with not much room and the service was not very good.

When the bill came there was a proper reservoir dogs moment as they were all paying about a fiver extra for tips, and i calculated what I had had and paid exactly that into the pot.

You should try it, it's liberating.

You

Wakey wakey, its not about me.

Try being the awkward sod. Its fun. My mates assume that I'll be awkward every time and live with it.

International Women's Day?

Jimjam and jamie done made me laugh out loud. 🙂

Just get the new wheels

and i calculated what I had had and paid exactly that into the pot.

You should try it, it's [s]liberating[/s] just about the most nobbish thing you can do in a restaurant.

FTFY 😉

Good to see your growing up.

Welcome to the beentheredonethatdontgiveashitanymore club.

Entries free BTW.

bikebouy - Member
Good to see your friend/mate/acquaintance is growing up.

Welcome to the beentheredonethatdontgiveashitanymore club.

Entries free BTW.

I've fixed that...

The first step is to stop asking people on Internet forums what to buy, do and think.

I'm not sure why you all think this is about me - although I can see why.

It actually came from me listening/observing a conversation between four girls yesterday on the train back from Cardiff, whereby one was trying to relent from a previously arrange "party" back in Cardiff, the other three were pushing her to go whilst she was trying hard to say no while complaining about the cost of the train / travelodge etc.

Upon reflection, my analysis gave me pause to think about how my mindset had changed, just before the original OP and I googled Peer pressure. It can be a quite damaging mental issue for some.

Good to see your growing up

I was asked the other day but an infrequent accquantance how my job - corporate sales - was going. My reply was that I felt that effectively owning my own business outcomes and the resulting effort / role had forced my perpetual "peter pan"* mentality to grow up - my actual words. I always thought i never really wanted to "grow up" and struggle with some of the seriousness of llfe / expression of my personality. Since I realised a level of personal acceptance I'm at more of a balance.

*Actually written on a school report of mine once.

Anyway that enough self analysis of me, this isn't a Kryton-level angst/vanity thread 😀

I've always found it easier to not care about peer pressure, and just get on with my life the way I want. Of course this has the side effect of having no "friends", but then I don't see that they would be friends if I have to change myself to fit into their idea of what I should be.

It can get lonely though.

I find there are 2 types of people in this world.
Those that think I am a knob because I diverge from the 'normal' path
and
Those who accept that I will choose my own way and occasionally it will be the same way they are going

(NB I do not fat bike)

Okay, but had the group of friends committed to paying for hotel/night out etc, based on a the idea of shared cost and now they will all get stung as a result?

Should the person in question have just said no in the first place rather than the vague "might" attend that you imply was the original answer? I think this is the crux of this issue. Indecision followed by decisiveness is as bad as indecision all round.

Peer pressure - mentally healthier to resist?

Yes, and better for the group too.

Every group has got that one person who wants EVERYONE to do EVERYTHING and won't take no for an answer, but every group's got those people who can't say no, they have to make excuses or give reasons that sound like they'd love to go if it wasn't for the date/time/location etc and let everyone else try to change things to suit them whilst they come up with more reasons - just bloody say no!

It's something I've had to work on myself, I'm very good at saying no (politely) to things I just don't want to do, less good at saying no to things I really shouldn't or cannot do.

I've just had to accept that I might have to say no 3-4 times for it to sink in, the 'trick' is to be honest "I won't enjoy that" or words to that effect the suit the needs without sounding rude. Rather than giving false excuses.

The first step is to stop asking people on Internet forums what to buy, do and think.

How do I do that?

[url= https://www.simplypsychology.org/asch-conformity.html ]Peer pressure[/url]
[url= https://www.simplypsychology.org/milgram.html ]Authority[/url]

I'm not sure why you all think this is about me - although I can see why.

er 🙂