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They're not really a demographic as there are only 17 of them
In Binnersnomics, with what other group are you lumping them then? Seeing as that's your style today... 🙂
Its a very valid question DD. Given the somewhat random nature of the whole exercise, we could include them with cross-dressing communists or nazi morris dancers
*is getting annoyed with binners' refusal to bite*
I'm finishing work for a week in approximately four minutes. Short of murdering my family in front of me, nowt could upset me at the moment fella 😀
And I also like the idea of i-reading nazi-sympathising morris-dancers
I have a morning tomorrow, then Thursday off - roadie-rider here I come. Then an early morning flight to hAmsterdam for the weekend.
Mmmm...drugs.
Sounds like a dream ticket fella! I'm off up to the lakes. We should put together some new demographics for [i]Binnersnomics[/i]
I'm sure the Dam will provide a host of interesting characters
HAVE FUN 😀
Over and out y'all. WOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
I guess this all just highlights how challenging it is to bring kids up these days. Soem of my earlier experiences at one place I worked was that the kids were seen almost as a social accessory with the parents not really wanting to be involved the in the whole "parenting" bit of it. Farmed out to a nanny while they went to work (not specifically because they needed the money from both of them working, but more that neither of them could bear the idea of being at home all day looking after them). Haven't seen them for a long time now but those were not the ingredients for a happy childhood. Jamie's Dream School was an interesting observation on some "difficult" children, many of whom were from very middle class backgrounds. Out of control kids are not a pretty sight at all adn you can't help feeling sorry for them that unless anything dramatic happens post teenage years they are destined for very unhappy adult lives, which is pretty tragic.
I feel very fortunate that so far my kids are pretty well adjusted, well behaved and a pleasure to be with. This is largely thanks to a fantastic wife being a brilliant mother and as a family being firm on discipline and boundary setting. Have we got everything right? No, of course not, not by a long way. As a parent you always live with the concern about whether you are doing the right thing for them both now and in the long term. The evidence for us so far is that perhaps we have probably just about managed to enough of the good things to outweigh the mistakes.
Not much help with the OP but perhaps as others have suggested either limit the time you do spend with the spoiled "princess" or, for those times when you do have to be together as families, make sure your two know that the boundaries have not changed and you still expect them to behave in the way they know you expect them to. Any change to that and they will be disciplined and will reap the consequences - whatever they tend to be in your family.
I can fully sympathise. We live in an area with a higher-than-average incidence of middle class, Guardian reading, lentil chomping, yoghurt-knitters. Some of them are so achingly PC and liberal (read: wishy-washy and spineless) that they regard any discipline whatsoever as tantamount to beating their kids with sticks.
That's a very curious thing to say. I'm from an area that was higher than average middle class very locally and not quite so locally very much "lower" than middle class. It was always the local kids that were well disciplined and ordered whereas the out-of-area kids were a nightmare bunch of spoilt brats that always got their way.
How experiences can differ! Goes to show you shouldn't judge a book by its class, cover or your personal experiences.
out of control children go hand in hand with bad parenting.
people are too scared to discipline their own kids these days...
All the 40 something champagne socialists
= STW
I resent that remark. I'm 50 several.
people are too scared to discipline their own kids these days...
No they're not, just too lazy and think that parent == friend.
parent == friend
I'm surprised at how often I hear parents addressing their kids as "mate" 😕 A slippery road...
Don't get me wrong, I think that parents can be friends with their kids 🙂 But as you're well aware they clearly need to have parent as the over-riding role and ensure the two do not cross purposes.
I met a spoilt brat that was used to getting her own way and had hissy fits when she didn't get what she wanted.
Her mother had taken her away from her father at a young age and used her as a tool against him. Proper nasty little madam she was.
Problem is, I met her when she was an adult and she did all the same things to me, that her mother did to her father.
Piece of advice for anybody looking to date a "I want" type of girl... Check the mother first 🙂
I worked in a kids club during summer holidays, so many spoiled brat kids. You can easily match them up to thier parents. As others have said brattyness gets worse the older she gets. It needs nipping in the bud now, i have full sympathy for you, I've seen how one brat can be destructive to other children. In time I hope your sons see her as a brat too and stop copying her.
Mooly - have you thought about having your niece one day a week (without the parents)?
It'll be hard at first, but I think she'll really get to like the idea of rules and boundries, which is what most children need.
We have played a large part in bringing up my slightly spoilt nephew (who's father annoyingly calls him mate, as DD pointed out). He seems to really enjoy the one day a week he spends with us and all the sleepovers.
When he's with us, he has to do some easy chores, sit at the table and eat properly, say please, thankyou (basic manners in my book)and is rewarded with rides out on his bike, walks in the countryside etc.which he loves.
He's always respected us for the fact his 'treats' are not material, or money, but are more spending time with him, oh and lots of cuddles. (although at 8 years of age) he thinks he's getting too old for those.
I'm surprised at how often I hear parents addressing their kids as "mate" A slippery road...
I'm from Essex mate, it's that or geez, and as I'm expecting a daughter...
I don't know what I'd do in this situation tbh. I think if you've got your values and techniques then it's fair to use that standard when you're looking after your niece. If you aren't happy with the way your kids are treated there, then make it known subtly. Or just don't let your kids be there so much, that's not so easy though is it?
Bunnyhop!
Great words and advice. Unfortunately we live too far apart for that to happen or i would certainly relish the chance of sitting her down at the family dinner table and getting a balanced meal into her and sitting patiently till everyone had finished.
I also guess you have hit the nail on the head about the most basic of things. Please - thanks you - Pardon etc. I cant believe that some parents dont instill this in their children.
Whats more worrying is the fact that my sister isn`t doing this!
Its beyond belief.
Sounds like the problem is the sister and partner. As this is obviously upsetting you - perhaps it is time to talk to them. This might be unpleasant, but unless they accept your beliefs your relationship with them is not going to get any better
consistant law laying is the answer!
We have the same prob with our friends kids. When they play up we TELL them how it is, who is in charge and what they can't do. The shocked little ****ers quickly start acting properly as they realise they've approached a boundary. The parents look at us like we've just crapped pure gold. We never shout or smack. I suppose it's easier when your missus is 6foot and built like a concrete shitter.
My house, my rules. Sorry if thats old fashioned, but kids need defined boundaries of what is & isnt acceptable. Not talking draconian measures here by any means, & the kids know if they come round ours they can go a bit wild but that they have to reign it in when told. They accept it & have a great time when they come to ours.
I upset the Wifes Sister once, when I told her she would have to sit her youngest in the car if he carried on. My two boys arent angels, & they can be a pain sometimes, but if its a public place I wont tolerate anything that is likely to annoy other folk, however much freinds are letting their kids get away with.
DD I was using all the many factors to weave together, to conjure in your mind if you will, the image that I'm greeted with when picking the kids up from school.
Heh.. however seems to me that most middle class people I know think carefully about bringing up kids and put a lot of effort into doing it right. Most problem kids seem to come from parents who don't give much of a toss either way.