MegaSack DRAW - This year's winner is user - rgwb
We will be in touch
Not had a good one in ages? You lot could fall out with a singing nun in an Alpine setting. Come on, someone must have something juicy?!?!
My neighbours insist on closing our shared electric gates every time they drive through them meaning delivery men can't get in and we have to wait for them to open when we're in a hurry. The bastards.
2/10
[s]My neighbours[/s] the guards insist on closing [s]our shared[/s] the electric gates every time they drive through them meaning prisoners can't get out
Massive fix
My elderly neighbours often take in parcels for me. They watch for me coming home, and when I pull up, they rudely tap on their window and point at their porch, just because they can't be arsed to pick up their walking frames and bring the parcels across themselves.
My neighbour not only hasn't repaid the pint of milk I lent her, but also kept the jug i put it in.
She's dead to me.
My neighbours are ace. They lend me bike tools, smile, chat and we all have a meal together now and then.
The swines.
My neighbour not only hasn't repaid the pint of milk I lent her, but also kept the jug i put it in.She's dead [s]to me[/s][b]now[/b].
My next door neighbour still doesn't talk to me, I pass him most weekends on our shared drive, he'll have his bike on the stand, I'll roll by on mine "hi" he doesn't look up and sort of murmurs "h..." not even the full 'hi'.
I couldn't work it out, I'm fairly introverted myself but another cyclists I'll talk to.
Until last week, Wife saw him go out for a jog, came back 45 mins later jumped straight on his road bike and sprinted off for an hour.
The penny dropped, he's a triathlete.
How can I live next door to a triathlete?!?!
Next door insist on having home delivery from ASDA.....it's SOOOOOOO embarrassing.I've dropped Waitrose leaflets through the door but to no avail 🙄
Ours maintain their garden immaculately showing up our half assed efforts.
One of my neighbours watches out for my youngest kids when they play on the street, and is incredibly patient with all the noise he must hear through the shared wall.
The other neighbour has a terminal illness, and I am gutted. They have only been in the house for about 3 years, and in that time not only have they improved it immensely, he and I have enjoyed some good banter.
All in all, we've been pretty lucky around here.
Edit. Even by my standards. No.
Ours maintain their garden immaculately showing up our half assed efforts.
Mine got so bored of the plants out the front of our house dying she started watering them for us.
Next door has 15 guinea pigs.
.
And I'm allowed to pet them 
My neighbour bought an e bike.
He is waiting for a heart transplant though.
My neighbours hedge is a bit overgrown, to the extent that I make a point of driving the front of my van passive-aggressively through it whenever I go up the drive.
It really winds him up.
Good.
My neighbours either side keep trying to get me doing road rides with them
****ers
😉
On one side the rogue landlord is barred from renting so the flat is empty...Down below the old lady died...That's empty too for a while...Other side dunno very quiet maybe dead?
Some fanny cleans the close stairs with a hoover, wait! that's me.
My daughter scratched the side of my neighbour's car when we'd both told her not to ride her bike between the cars many times.
He was very good about it and didn't accept any money from me.. and not from her when she went round with all her pocket money to try and make it up to him.. then instead she made him a sorry card and took that round instead.
Just the usual fence disputes, trying to get me to pay half towards the fence that isn't mine.
£800 you say, no thanks it ain't mine!
He then follows it up by doing a £100 'that'll do' fix when I'm not paying for it.
My neighbour opposite has a teenage kid who is learning to drive so 17ish.
He's also a little overweight and has a right drinkers belly. Although it annoys me, his tendency to rap some form of gansta grime, complete with effs, jeffs and c-bombs, is hilarious.
Not so much when my four year old is outside but it does compensate. He normally stops singing when I let my four year old dance to his rapping. THE POWER OF DANCE.
Ours maintain their garden immaculately showing up our half assed efforts.Mine got so bored of the plants out the front of our house dying she started watering them for us.
This and this.... were hoping they'll sort out our front lawn too, whilst were at work.
I hate old people 😉
My parents neighbour has cut a plant well inside our garden (must have leant well over the wall which is about 7 ft high). Parents don't really want to start a big dispute but aren't pleased. 2nd time, they also did it 4 years ago.
We live in a group of 7 houses, with lots of shared space. the Australians call this a "townhouse", but I guess in the UK, it would be called a "mews" by some spikey-haired **** from Foxtons. Anyway:
The lady in the house nearest the road to totally bat-sh*t mental. Her front garden is almost beyond description, she's like a womble, she just collects all manner of tut and "displays" it in her front garden. Old tree stumps, various bits of road furniture, actual furniture, random bits of metal bent into unusual shapes and (perhaps the very worst) WIND CHIMES.
We had a chat with a member of the owners committee who told us that she submitted a $2,000 invoice after taking it upon herself to jet-wash some of the common areas. After being told to poke her invoice (obviously), she is now taking them to court because she apparently slipped over whilst doing said jet-washing.
We only rent, so we are quite enjoying keeping out of it!
My neighbours are my landlords...It says here on the handy crib sheet they gave me, that they are in fact lovely.
Mate at work lives next to a total maniac, started feeding the birds to annoy folk, but it's spiralled into full blown madness, been at court loads, been sectioned, nails meat to the back fence to attract rats, slashed tyres, nails on the road, to be honest I can't even recall half of it.
He started to hide behind mental illness as a defence as he was threatened with an ASBO, it gives him incredible protection, no one is allowed to speak to him or challenge his behaviour, he films everything - everyone in town knows about it, so selling a house there is nigh on impossible.
Bugger that.
Our neighbour has been fitting his own kitchen for 4 months now - not sure he'll see the summer out if he continues drilling at 7.30pm on a Sunday night.
He's obsessed with hoovering too - he'll drill, hooover, drill, hoover, drill, hoover on and on and on. Just make a ruddy mess at clear up at the end!!!
I knocked on the bloke opposite's door to report some dodgy looking yoof had been hanging around his immaculate motorhome looking through the windows.
It was his son.
My neighbour has gone to America for 3 weeks, and left her teenage son at home/caring for her dog ... which means the dog is barking from early evening till late at night every day ... every car that goes up street, every person who walks past house, even for no particular reason - it just goes into a barking frenzy.
My neighbour has gone to America for 3 weeks, and left her teenage son at home/caring for her dog ... which means the dog is barking from early evening till late at night every day ... every car that goes up street, every person who walks past house, even for no particular reason - it just goes into a barking frenzy.
Teenage son, home alone, three weeks. I'd say you were getting off pretty lightly so far!
my neighbour keeps bringing me fresh fish from the lake. He however crosses the garden and comes up to the kitchen door, not using the front entrance . Very rude
My daughter scratched the side of my neighbour's car when we'd both told her not to ride her bike between the cars many times.He was very good about it and didn't accept any money from me.. and not from her when she went round with all her pocket money to try and make it up to him.. then instead she made him a sorry card and took that round instead.
But there's a venomous 16-page thread on mumsnet about it.
😉
Our neighbour used to come and feed our cat for us when we were away. Since the cat was put down, she hasn't offered once.
I lent my neighbour my sliding compound mitre saw and dehumidifier over a year ago, and forgot about them because i didn't need them. The arse not only bought the dehumidifier back when i told him to consider it a permanent loan, but also bought me a brand new identical saw due to the wear and rear he didn't really cause to mine.
What an arse.
My neighbour not only hasn't repaid the pint of milk I lent her, but also kept the jug i put it in.She's dead to me.
To be honest, it may be she's dead to everyone.
DrP
Our neighbours turned off our water supply when we were on holiday 👿 when confronted their feeble excuse was that they could see our overflow pipe running and were worried we might get flooded, cheeky interfering sods
My next door neighbour has just put her house up for sale. She's decluttering and insisted that we must keep all of her son's old lego. We now have about 8 tesco bags full cluttering up our house. Outrageous.
Our neighbours aren't poisonous but they do have three smoking hot daughters
One summer's evening lst year I pulled up and noticed the eldest one was cleaning her car in a crop top and cut-off shorts, all covered in foam *cough*
As if that wasn't enough she sauntered over dripping sponge in hand and asked me how I got my car so clean
Doreen hasn't made me the cake she promised for putting up the trellis.
The cheek of it.
Our neighbours turned off our water supply when we were on holiday when confronted their feeble excuse was that they could see our overflow pipe running and were worried we might get flooded, cheeky interfering sods
Is my sarcasm meter broken? You seriously are annoyed at that?
Done you a massive favour and looking out for you.
Whoosh
Yes it's broken gobuchul
😆
Here at work the office tannoy is going mad with increasingly urgent requests for people to move their cars because our neighbours on the estate have a crane in today. Not really a dispute though.
Our neighbours at the bottom of the garden (terraced houses) have just bought a cockerel as apparently hens get lonely on their own. 2 weeks of 5 am crowing and I'm done. I'm pondering first move - all suggestions welcome.
Not neighbours but maybe killing some of my lazy work colleagues today.
Our neighbours turned off our water supply when we were on holiday when confronted their feeble excuse was that they could see our overflow pipe running and were worried we might get flooded, cheeky interfering sods
I'd probably have done the same. And if someone had done that to me I'd have been chuffed.
But then I don't have automatic plant watering or anything like that.
We needed a crane on our front lawn for a tree-surgery job and having finished, they filled in the ruts with sand. Our neighbours three cats see it as a public lavatory. Not the neighbours fault I guess but relations might sour if I step in one more and they see a cat being drop-kicked over my gate.
Our next door neighbour only had two new world IPAs on tap during last week's beer festival which I thought was a bit poor..
And while I appreciate the 5-7pm happy hour, I think 50p off any pint is a bit stingy..
Our neighbours are very nice, but she does go on a bit, so I try and avoid getting drawn in if I'm busy. I hope she doesn't think I don't like her.
Farmer owner of field behind my house has access to the field via our shared gravel drive.
The 'Ladies of the pasture' made their move from the Winter Barn to the field this week. One or two of them left cow pats on drive. Pfffftttt.
My MIL has a neighbour who quite frankly is an utter arse. He's in his mid 70's shes 85 this year.
He's moaned about urr parking on the gravel in front of her own house (apparently the house deeds are old and you can't park there as its not load bearing), accused me of blocking him in (there was about an 8' wide gap to "squeeze" his car though), forced a Sainsburys delivery man to drive up the road as he was blocking the shared drive (its a delivery FFS, how long do you think hes going to be there fore), he even came round to tell her to stop banging the door from the conservatory to the lounge (its semi detached FFS).
Most annoyingly I've been banned from having a chat with him by the MIL and my OH. Bastards.
My neighbour thinks we do too much reversing*. We live in a small hammerhead cul de sac and can only get the van in the drive if we reverese it down the road. She also thinks the local schoolchildren should not use the street outside to do their "bike ability" courses. You know the one that teaches them about junctions and traffic etc. Apparently the school playground is much safer...
* This is not a euphamisim, but I'd be interested to hear what you thought it might be?
Our neighbour takes out our bins. She started when sandwicheater jnr arrived to help out. That was four years ago. Feels a bit odd when you're at the breakfast table and she walks into the garden to get them.
My neighbours in the past have been complete bell ends. Only topped by the current ones who take great pleasure in baking huge banoffee pies and cream cakes which they bring round to me. They make excuses of not being able to eat themselves but I am not convinced. I am sure the 70yr old wife secretly fancies me and is a closet 'feeder'. I am currenty trying to lose weight so I don't look so attractive to her
My neighbour walks our dog and does most of our garden because he doesn't like the mess I leave it in, he's also much better at DIY than me so I let him get on with that as well. I figure as he doesn't work it gives him something to do. Yesterday he wanted me to come over and help him move a table, WTF tipping point was on.
He started to hide behind mental illness as a defence
TBH, he does seem to be putting on quite a convincing act.
I have one neighbour 3 doors down who is an ex smoker. He is retired so gets up early to survey the street and uses the opportunity to hack up half a lung and spit it out on the street. If you're lieing in bed with the window open the sound is a most pleasant way to awaken to the day. He is 'a bit funny' so I have so far avoided asking him to do it in his back garden or inside his house, however some mornings when I'm in a bad mood and putting the kids in the car I will occasionally mimic the noise a few minutes later hoping he gets the hint, how very passive aggresive of me. 😀