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Good cheer and a brighter horizon.
Three weeks ago I made a post about drinking too much which for me was a way of trying to cope with a much more serious underlying problem and an awful situation that I found myself in. Here is a positive update.
I had returned Edinburgh after six months of being a reclusive wreck and not being on the bike for a very long time. Staying in my old home - my ex's, with her and much sadness and tension. It took a few weeks until I got my bike in working order and headed out.
Following my post about the drinking I received good advice and support from people on STW and someone much wiser than me suggested that instead of going to buy the evenings booze, I go out the bike.
So I did exactly that.
My regular ride will be familiar to many here. It starts off with a climb up and around Arthurs Seat: our own mini mountain in the city. The view along the coast and then across the city as you round the hill is brilliant. Everything looks better from above. A mild evening and the city feels alive. Across the meadows (a city park), along the canal (tentatively over the cobbled aquaduct path) and up through a wooded dell along the river and finally a short bit of climbing and I'm out of the city below the open hills. I went just far enough to be away from the city and be able to look north across the forth to the mountains of the southern Highlands.
This first ride was testing - I'd not ridden inclines for long time. Opened the lungs up and made me cough for all the next day. But there was a joy to be out there and I went again the next day. In the morning I walked up Arthurs Seat and sat at the summit in the sunshine looking at the city I love to live in. Not a run up for fitness (I nearly collapsed with a lack of energy on the way up) but to drink it all in and savour it like a new experience. Had an emotional moment.
Ride up to the hills again later and watch the suns final evening glow from on high. Exhausted but feeling good.
The following day I rode out along the coast again in glorious sunshine and arrived at the Forth Rail Bridge, tide high and looking to the north and the west. There is an inbuilt trajectory in me that compels me in that direction. Emotional moment again.
So for the next weeks I ride every day, through wind, rain, dark, illness, hangover, and a lot more wind. I'd be out in the evening for up to five hours, away from the tension in the flat and getting stronger in body and heart.
I would go further than before, linking descents and trying new routes, dragging myself and bike over the tops of hills and often descending the final hill with the city lit up below in the late evening. By the time I'd get back and get cleaned and fed there wasn't much time for drinking. Last week was my first day since June without a drink at all.
I'd like to wax lyrical about a lot of what happened on my rides but this post is long enough for now. I mapped all the rides and bike route toaster told me that in the first two weeks back on he bike I covered 400 miles and 22,000 ft of ascent. That's a hell of a lot for me.
Someone also told me that other things would fall in place and they have. I've met old friends and seen the lively, dynamic part of life here again. On Saturday I had a great night out with some new friends and met up with a girl I first saw at new year. A beautiful, sassy redhead who I actually graduated with but didn't know her at the time. A couple of parties, some of the old art crowd and a great night that came out of the blue. Walking home across the city in the morning sunshine I was the happiest I'd been in years. I loved is place a little bit more. Tonight I'm seeing her again. It may not go any further (she's much younger than me and I hadn't totally stopped thinking of myself as a wreck) but I'll take what comes.
I'm looking forward to a new home, new independence, whatever comes and a lot of riding a bike.
I love where I live, where I ride.
Good to hear, I'm in a similar place right now and that's a pretty inspiration thing to hear 🙂
Blimey - what a great post!
that's really good to hear!...Good on ya!
Have you been riding with other people as well? Could make it better for you.
Fantastic post though, good for you.
yaay! 😀
*applauds*
Glad to hear of something positive happening.
Why not try to join up with some of the other riders from Edinburgh? Wednesday night rides are go and I for one am out most weekends around the city somewhere. Email me if you want some routes as well.
Good to hear, onwards and upwards.
Bikes are ace.
Great post, life is f'cking good no?
great post.. 🙂 🙂
😀
I love where I live, where I ride.
Quote of the day. And I'm in total agreement with you.
Spring is a great time for renewal, mental and physical. Things are springing back into life, days are getting longer and the weather is improving.
A great time of year to be alive and enjoying the world.
I remember reading your original posting and its really heartening to hear that some of the advise on here has worked for you!
Onward and upwards!
I'm absolutely made up that its working out fella. That's really put a smile on my face. Onwards and upwards indeed. There's a whole dry dusty summer stretching out in front of us too. It doesn't get better than that 😀
Don't go riding with TJ, he'll have you back on the booze in no time!
😉
😀 Made my day. Thanks for the thanks. Great to hear that and keep it up!
Good for you! The girl sounds nice too. I tip my hat. 🙂
There'll be a time when you're riding as much as poss and things might start to drop off. Stay strong, keep guys like [url= http://uk.freecaster.tv/bmx/1015461/pass-the-bucket-stephen-murray ]Stephen Murray[/url] in mind.
Keep it up, good on yer.
Hey sweets that's fantastic to hear!! So pleased for you. Onwards and upwards now mate
Love Debs xxxx 
Fantastic. Keep riding, keep smiling and taking in all that surrounds you.
One step at a time with the lovely young lady.
P.S. Age never matters.
Great to hear how things are improving for you mate 🙂
🙂 great news so far and good luck for the future. A really heartwarming post that must make you feel even better.
Post of the day!!! Brilliant! 🙂
You know what mate.... thats put a smile on my face.
What a great post. Well done you!
You've lifted my day and for that I thank you. I've been getting over a break too over the last few months, also local to Edinburgh, and the bike and running has played its part. No sassy redhead, though, so I can't be doing it quite right 🙂 Enjoy tonight, regardless of what may come of it
Good man Bobble. Speak soon.
Good work comrade...
Wow. I'm bowled over by your replies. Really. I'm just back from the hills and in the final stages of wardrobe crisis before going out. Yeah, wow. Spread some happiness eh...
mmmmmmmm redheads
good work fellah keep up the riding it makes everything a bit more bearablr
Well done for getting out that door and discovering the joys of fresh air and bikes. 😀
Great achievement and good to hear of your optimism for the future.
I do remember your last post, some good advice was posted. Which goes to prove that nothing is as bad as it seems at the time.
Well done and good luck 😉
Fantastic - it's absolutely ace when life turns around after a complete train wreck isn't it 🙂
Sounds great
Stay away from the redhead though, she's bound to be trouble 😉
Seriously though after a nasty break up, I stayed single for a while. May not be the best idea, but it worked out well for me
Very proud of you
Great post, but you did miss the really important question.....What tyres for a joyous personal epiphany?
make sure the redhead's logos and values are lined up and it'll be the perfect start to the reast of your life, nice one
make sure the redhead's logos and values are lined up
Was that a typo, or are you Naomi Klein?
Come on then. You can't keep us in suspense. Progress report please. What happened with the redhead? 😀
nice one. 😀
He's not got home yet 😀 Wonder how long she'll keep him.....
Something as simple as riding a bike really can change our perception of the outside world. Thanks for the reminder and keep experiencing each moment as it comes.
Haha, contain yourself binners. A lady's honour may be at stake. Discretion you know. Anyway, I've been a bit distracted away from t'internet.
Meeting up later to see a friend's band. We were going to see Kassidy at an earlier gig but there's not time for that which is a shame because it would be the perfect gig to take her to. Of course, all this will be after the daily constitutional hack around the hills.
Addendum: Sometimes it all just lines itself up in front of you.
Capped a quite a weekend with a great ride last night. Kept putting back the start of the ride until the evening. It panned out very well indeed.
Such a beautiful warm and sunny afternoon promised to yield a great sunset and with this in mind I headed out in the evening through the city spaces: all ball games and barbecues and up to the hills. Trending west towards that orange glow and soon enough the north western skyline is revealed and I can't take my eyes off it. The view is very familiar but that orange sky vividly highlights the serrated line of hills and mountains across the Forth valley. Brilliant.
I had vague plans for the ride and it seemed to be shaping up nicely.
Turning east and upwards I was aware that the light seemed strangely dimmed - though there was a big ball of red sitting above the mountains on the western horizon. I kept looking back as I climbed and the red ball seemed to neither dim nor lower. It just sat there in the haze of the atmosphere.
The top of this little climb is a shallow U shaped dip between two round hills and just as I hit the top - there nestled in the U was a massive, bright full moon large and low in the sky. Perfectly framed and a really dramatic reveal. A wow moment.
I then realised that the red ball in the west wasn't behind the haze, it was the light of the moon projecting onto it. A false sun. I stopped and stood for few minutes twisting my head from eastern to western aspect. This was something that I can't recall seeing before and I found it captivating.
Onwards. Around the hills with the dying light across the Forth on my left and the moon making another surprise brief appearance in a gap between the high ground. Campfire glow in the trees behind the reservoir and I head for the shoulder of the last hill before descent. It was as dark as I wanted it be when I get there. From here it feels like the whole city is alight just below me. Beyond it and before the hills of the skyline is a wide flat stream of silver that is the Forth estuary. Clusters of lights of the towns across in Fife and to the west. I stayed here for ten mintues or so just drinking it in. It's a fascinating, widely encompassing and varied view. Sea, city and mountains.
A failing light made the descent interesting. The track down was badly churned from winter - mostly hardened from recent dry weather apart from one mudpit that took my front wheel hub deep. I don't know I managed to keep my feet out of it. Soon enough I'm riding back through town.
It was a very satisfying ride - familiar place but with glorious surprises.